Mistletoenails

Khakis make people look naked

[damazcuz]

The lion is concerned. The lion is honestly really fucking worried.

[fireopals]

[aropride]

[whole body so tense you'd think it was a verb form indicating what time an action occurred] yeah i'm fine why

[gaytanic-panic]

[thememedaddy]

[sunsetbuddie]

hey so anyone else just, feel thin. sort of stretched. like butter scraped over too much bread. like you need a holiday. a very long holiday. and you don't expect you shall return? or is that just me and bilbo baggins

[yourdeaddoll]

i date to:

> marry

> die together

> get buried in our beautiful garden

> haunt our manor forever

[contemptible-scoundrel]

due to woke theyre now calling it five pregnant guys burgers and fries

[worlds-of-garnet-ink]

perhaps a shower will cure me. like going to stay by the seaside

[contemptible-scoundrel]

guy with a cube fetish who drinks weird coffee: I like my women like I like my coffee... geometric with six smooth, featureless faces

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

cute little girl excitedly telling her class she's gonna bring her pet bunny in for show and tell and everyone is expecting an adorable ball of fluff but then she comes in with the most demonically possessed looking hare ever. she's got him clutched to her chest like you would hold a stuffed animal but his long back legs are dragging on the ground. she smothers him in kisses and proudly tells everyone "I haven't been able to teach him how to fetch or anything yet but if you look in his eyes long enough he can tell you how you'll die!!! 🥰"

[what-even-is-thiss]

Pretty sure a friend of mine has that exact rabbit

[idiopathicsmile]

no more hustle culture; we're doing heist culture now. assemble some quirky friends with highly specific abilities. learn how to work together despite your differences. create a shared goal and move towards it, making sure you always have a backup plan or two. visit the louvre, see what happens

[escuerzoresucitado]

[official-linguistics-post]

official linguistics post

[t4tstarvingdog]

“start your free trial now” what if i told u i am already experiencing trials. and the cost is more than i can bear

[boatgrave-deactivated20250901]

[mysteryteacup]

*Scrolls past*

*reluctant sigh*

*scrolls back up*

*rebogs*

[markscherz]

[estrogenesis-evangelion]

i don't care if monday's bleak

tuesday matches wednesday's freak

thursday mispronouncing steak

it's friday, i'm in love

[segamascott]