mj @mjisnotreal - Tumblr Blog

I love using "by the way" as a segue into topics that are completely unrelated to the matters at hand. it isn't remotely by the way, quite a ways out of the way in fact. a little adventure

if i were a whale i would swallow people and spit them out all the time. make them appreciate what they have. life is finite, i will eat you.

#inspirational #yum kayak taste good #ew person taste bad #love yourself #whale #epic whale moment #pinocchio

me when i take a good selfie

#sophie thatcher #yellowjackets #yj #lucy dacus in that one picture

guys we need to get doechii an inhaler

#she’s having an asthma attack #cuntiest asthma attack #how to slay while having asthma #swamp queen #asthma queen #nosebleeds #when i breathe you breathe #i can’t without my inhaler #doechii #guess we’ll never know

if i were an elephant i would stomp on someone….. perhaps

#only if they deserved it #i’m not a monster #i’m an elephant #obviously

ex-riddlecats

party rockers in their bed tonight. every body just have a good night

pompeiusmagnus

youare all just jealous of my severed head

one 1️⃣ grilled🔥cheese🧀with☝🏻bacon 🥓 and 👩‍❤️‍👨tomatoes🍅😍

tomatoes 🍅 on🔛the🤓side⤵️please😌

#cold tomatoes pls #and fries pls #can you make the fries crispy #well done fries please #thank you #jake’s hates to see me coming #small town slut #grilled cheese slut #regular slut #who up grilling they cheese #who up jaking they eatery #who up copying they pasta

sabrina’s “taste” and olivia’s “de ja vu” are two sides of the same coin

#short n sweet #sour #olivia rodrigo #sabrina carpenter #they should work it out on the remix

strayknight

if i lived in the mushroom kingdom luigi and i would be best friends

strayknight

mario and i would have a mutual respect for each other but we never really clicked

strayknight

princess peach would have me executed via firing squad for the role i played in the infamous toad town murders of '96 but it would be later discovered that my involvement was greatly exaggerated and the severity of my sentence will weigh on peachs mind as she feels like it sullied her reputation as a fair and just ruler

strayknight

daisy and i would play tennis