Liams Journey

The story of our long journey after nearly losing our son to adoption coercion.

[moandtsellers]

Not going to give up fighting...

I will be going to the Nebraska legislative session in January where a bill will be proposed pertaining to adoption laws as a direct result of our adoption case. The proposed bill however is not at all what I had requested, but was designed based upon input from adoption lawyers and adoption agencies. And guess who gets paid for adoptions?? Yep, adoption agencies and lawyers. So of course they have designed a bill that will protect THEIR best interest and NOT the children. You can bet your butt I will be fighting that. In the proposed bill an adoptive couple can use coercion as much as they want and it will not affect the finalization of any adoption. This is totally wrong and unethical. Please send an email to Nebraska senators and demand that this does not happen! I've proposed that at the very least there is counseling for a mother and that she is told that most adoptions do not and will not include her in any way. Promises are almost always broken and she should be prepared for that possibility. Also any adoption papers should be signed in a court room with a judge present. I am an educated woman, but the day we signed papers it was handled so casually and things were not explained. I truly thought I was signing temporary documents. If we had been in a court room setting it would have been made clear to us and everything said would have been documented. Please don't let this happen to other people like us. Please fight for children's rights and the rights of EVERYONE involved in an adoption!! Teresa

[moandtsellers]

Remembering the bad days...

August 5 will forever be a very bittersweet day for me. Sweet because it’s my dear husbands birthday. Bitter because it is the day two years ago that we found out that the temporary custody papers we thought we had signed were actually final papers.

I will never forget those moments and the sinking feeling of despair and hopelessness that we felt when we learned what the consequences are of not reading a document before you sign it.

I am so thankful that God knew our hearts and He knows the truth of what happened in those horrible days, and He brought our precious son home.

This day will however be engrained in my heart though as one of the saddest days I’ve ever had in my life. After I found out what we truly had signed I stayed in bed for days with a mountain of used Kleenex beside me. I didn’t care if I lived or died. All I wanted was my son.

I look at him now and my heart overflows with thankfulness that God took our mistake and fixed it.

Thank you Lord for bringing us through all of that.

[moandtsellers]

Have I gone mad??

I remember when I was younger. I always felt I was a single mom, raising three kids, my husband being the third. I cared for the girls, got up during the night, wiped noses, gave baths, got them enrolled in school, did the dishes and laundry, fixed the meals, worked full time, and cleaned the house. Exhausted was my middle name during those days. So when I remarried at the age of 40 I looked back on those days and thought there is no way I would have the energy to do all of that again. A baby wasn't really the plan-but it would be fun to see a child that my new hubby and I could conceive. We both have very easy going, laid back personalities and a good sense of humor. Would our child be like that? What would he look like? So the idea of seeing what we could create together and sharing in the joy of our little "mini me" was very enticing. Another couple could also share our joy by raising him and we would all be a big happy family. Well it seemed a good idea at the time. But as it turns out, when you have the right partner to raise a child with, it is sooooo much fun!! We share the responsibilities. I really hate cooking, and Monty hates cleaning. So he cooks, I clean. We take turns with diaper changes and parental duties. It just works, and it works well. I'm enjoying it so much in fact that a really big part of me wishes we could have another child together. Wait- yes you read that right, I love parenting with my perfect partner and husband so much that I would do it again in a heart beat. Perhaps a big part of me is missing the chunk of time that we missed out on with our son. The big six month time period when those little stinkers change and grow so fast. I missed his first smile, laugh, sitting up and rolling over. I know I can never get that back, but I wish I could experience that joy with my hubby. Let's not forget the fact that we make awesome babies together. Liam is very funny, easy going, cute--no---adorable, smart and happy. He loves to snuggle like mommy and talk with his hands like daddy. Must be an Irish thing.... But because I had such a hard time carrying our little bundle of joy, we decided a vasectomy was the best answer. I would go back in time and carry that little boy through the back ache, swollen ankles, inflamed gallbladder and sleepless nights if I could just do it all different. So perhaps I have gone a bit mad, but I would do it all over again and I would love to have another child with the love of my life. I won't get the chance at either, so I will just have to enjoy the time that God has given us with our precious son...and I'm ok with that.

[moandtsellers]

Two is too cute!

On July 17,2015 we got to celebrate our sons 2nd birthday with him!  Part of me wanted to cry because I am so unbelievably happy that he is home with us, and another part wanted to cry because he is just growing too fast! 

Watching him open presents and get all excited about each one is better than watching a Super bowl game or whatever it is that other people get excited about seeing.  :)

We helped him practice for a few days before his birthday to say how old he is when asked.  He holds up two fingers and crosses them as if he's making a wish and says in the cutest voice ever "twwwooo" 

Ahh....music to my ears.

Terrible twos?  Not my son.  He is living the terrific twos!!

[moandtsellers]

The price of the fight

Well it has come to this. God saw us through in our fight for our son, and I have faith He will help us now as well. We have set up a go fund me page to help us put a dent in the enormous attorney fees we’ve accumulated in our court actions to keep our son. If God lays it on your heart to help us, then we thank you. If He lays it on your heart to pray for us, then we thank you for that as well. Anything will help. God bless. gofundme.com/Thefightforliam

[moandtsellers]

God makes miracles and people create drama

I can’t thank God enough for answering our prayers!! The joy of knowing our son will forever know his true blood family is beyond amazing. Some people still don’t get it though. I’ve gotten comments like, “I hope the Sellers get the karma they deserve”. “They will have to meet their maker one day. ” and “the p. A. P’s should have won. That baby was torn from the only family he knows. ” If only they knew. They didn’t see my son turn away from B as she reached for him during her visits. They don’t see the love in his eyes as he hugs me and says “my momma.” They will only believe the one sided stories they’ve heard, and God only knows what they’ve heard. But do they ask or care about what the truth is?? Do they care what Liam’s best interest is? How would he have felt years from now if we had lost? He would have felt very betrayed by the P. A. P’s if he had found out they kept him away from the family that loves him, wanted him and fought so hard for him.

I will hold my head high and know that I did what was best for my son. I know that God was in control of the situation and seven Supreme Court judges and a District court judge all agreed that the law was not followed and our son belongs with us. I thank God so much for helping them see the truth and bringing our precious son home. I still am in awe and just amazed and ecstatic that our precious boy is home with us.

[moandtsellers]

[moandtsellers]

An end to the longest road in my life

The Supreme Court of Nebraska has ruled in our favor. We will forever be blessed to be called Liam's mommy and daddy. I am so thankful and overjoyed that I can't even find the words!

[moandtsellers]

Waiting...please hold...

I haven't written in a while because there is still no news. Each week I think this may finally be the week we have an answer but each week goes by with no news. During this waiting game we have to send our son to a court ordered visitation with the other couple. This happens every Saturday from 1-5. The feelings I have as I watch my son leave with the people who hurt me more than anyone my whole life is beyond words. I am scared of how this will affect him and how confused he will be from all this. Over and over I have to answer people's questions. "How can these people even take you to Supreme Court when the adoption agency denied the adoption?" I have no answer. The more I try to make sense of it the more confused I get. The system is flawed. That is why I want to work so hard to make changes. So...maybe this will be the week. Maybe we will have our answer now. Pray, hope, wait...

[moandtsellers]

Funding

In my efforts to fight for my son and to work to get laws changed for the good of birth parents and children, I am selling candles. All money raised will be used to fight for this great cause. If you would like to help by ordering a candle please visit my website at https://www.jewelryincandles.com/store/tsellers https://www.facebook.com/jicsellers Thank you!

[moandtsellers]

My plea for law changes

The following is a letter I will be sending to every law maker I can find. I hope I can make a difference and the laws will change so adoption coercion will just be a distant horrible memory.

I urge everyone who has been a victim of adoption coercion to join me in this fight.

Dear Senator, Coercion. Fraud. Relinquishment. These are all words I was unfamiliar with until they impacted my life in a very horrible way. I was blindly led into a coercive adoption, and my rights as a mother were signed away before I even knew what had happened. I am pleading with you to consider changing the adoption laws to protect birthmothers, children, and adoptive parents. In my case I had agreed to have a child (biologically mine and my husbands) for some very close friends of ours who were unable to conceive. I made it clear before conception that I needed to be a part of my child’s life or I could not do this. The couple eagerly agreed and promised I would always be in his life and he would know who his real parents are. “One big happy family” was the term always used. The signing of documents were referred to as “temporary custody” and “48 hour” papers. I was also told the adoption wouldn’t be finalized until the baby was 6 months old. This also led me to believe I would not have to sign adoption papers until the 6 month time period. I did not have an attorney to represent me, and never even knew that was an option. We were told to take our baby to the Dr. the day after we left the hospital due to a slight fever. I was told by B-the potential adoptive parent, that in order for her to take him to the Dr. we HAD to go first thing in the morning after I was dismissed from the hospital so she would have papers to show the Dr. Once again, I thought these were temporary documents giving her a legal right to have my son in her home and to seek medical care for him until the adoption was final in 6 months. Early the next morning we left for a law office and met with a lawyer I had never seen before. I was crying my eyes out because I was really having doubts about not having my son for the 6 month time period, but I was too scared to say anything. I was horribly sleep deprived and taking a pain medication I wasn’t familiar with that made my thoughts even more cloudy. The whole meeting was very casual and there was a lot of talk between B and her lawyer about how we would remain involved in our sons life. I could barely see due to my crying, and regrettably just signed whatever paper was slid in front of me. I trusted this was temporary at this point, and never ever dreamed it would be so easy to sign away permanent rights so soon. We left the office with no copy of what we signed. Our son was born on July 17, and we didn’t find out what we had truly signed until August 5. I was devestated and heart broken. All I could say when I found out was “What have we done, what have we done???” I’ve gone through more red tape to adopt a puppy than what they did to take my son. I have researched and found support groups for so many women who have similar stories. Some don’t remember signing anything at all. Almost no one ever has had a lawyer to explain the documents before they are signed. I’ve seen a great deal of sad stories. Before this all happened to me I would have never believed half of these stories, or I would have dismissed the women as crazy. There is no way of knowing the emotions one will feel after your baby is born. Then when you have someone pushing papers in front of you and making promises to you, it is all just too overwhelming. I would like to propose a change to avoid this trauma to all parties involved. I propose that it become mandatory for a pregnant woman to recieve counseling at the expense of the potential adoptive parents so that she can make an informed decision. This will help ensure she is not being pressured or coerced by anyone, and that this is truly her decision. I propose that every pregnant woman would have to speak to an attorney prior to any signing to go over the documents that she will be expected to sign. The documents should be explained thoroughly by the attorney, and she should be told in no uncertain terms that once papers are signed, she will not have any rights to ever see that child again. Any promises made by the potential adoptive parents will most likely be broken, and she will have to learn to live without her child. I propose that the waiting period to sign papers be lengthened. Giving birth is a very hard, life changing moment and no woman should be expected to make a life changing decision in that condition. I propose that all adoption documents be signed in a court room in front of a judge. This will cause the woman to understand the seriousness of the matter, and everything said and done will be on record. While it is true that in some cases adoption is the best answer for a child; there are way too many cases such as mine that are very wrong and the system has failed us and our children. Please protect those of us who have been victimized by people that want a baby so badly that they will say and do anything to get their hands on one. Please protect the innocent children from such wrong doing. Thank you for your time and consideration in this matter.

[moandtsellers]

[moandtsellers]

[theunclaimedgeneration]

TUG***

[moandtsellers]

[moandtsellers]

[positivedoodles]