"He Touched the Butt"

Warning: ships, Legend of Zelda, anime, and lots of reblogged stuff up ahead! Icon was drawn by my good friend pigeonfeed (they're my ocs btw lol)

[wexler]

that one time on Hotel Hell when Gordon Ramsay fed the owner’s dog some shitty bread and then was afraid he killed her

[unclefather]

He checked her pulse

[stimman4000]

[zechery-deactivated20220114]

Him: yeah, suck that dick

Me, has authority issues: you boutta suck your own dick if you don’t shut up

[stream]

Spider-Man 2 (2004)

[its-only-the-rain]

Have you ever wondered how someone meets Santa? Well, you need to follow a very specific ritual to summon him.

[the-nwah-embassy]

Do you have any idea how long I’ve had this queued? Any idea? A year. A fucking year. I don’t even use my queue ever. Ever. This is the only thing I’ve EVER queued. I’ve had this queued for a year so I don’t forget it.

[toastbutteregg]

disney: attractions to appeal to your nostalgia or flaunt our licensed properties

universal: attractions designed to immerse you in our movies

six flags: do you wanna just barely cheat death?? here’s a 100000 ft roller coaster that goes faster than light

[unclefather]

[reinerist]

[iouoiuiioi]

Mood: Lol ok

[dare-i-say-asexual]

i love little kids with very niche interests. Like for awhile I nannied for a family who had a little girl who loved old black and white movies. She adopted a transatlantic accent, constantly wore a long string of plastic pearls, and would often dramatically drape herself over pieces of furniture when told to do something and say “I just can’t do it babe”

[dare-i-say-asexual]

i once dropped her stuffed animal and she yelled “there’s been a murder!”

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

drake?

[hazeleyedcat]

josh?

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

where’s the body of christ?

[wyrddog]

[ruinedchildhood]

[mamoru]

you may not be able to control the plot of your life, or the characters in it, or even the genre, but you can control one thing: the soundtrack. grab some headphones and make it a banger.

[godofavengers]

One of my new friends: *uses their own slang that I have never used before in my life*

Me subconciously:

[reinerist]

[delphinecormeir]

[koobaxion-deactivated20220403]