(co-written with my dear friend Dani â„)
âtaeminniiiiiiiiiiiiiieâ
âwhen will you be home? =3= i miss you so much.â
âIâm on my way. Iâll be here in half an hour.â
âIâm sorry Nini, should I drive as fast as possible?â
ânoooo!! you must drive safely & come back to me in one piece!â
âBe patient, Iâll be there soon. And I canât talk anymore. Iâm in the car.â
âi canât wait. i made chicken!!â
âOrdering chicken isnât âmakingâ chicken, Jongin-ah...â
âshut up, drive, & stop teasing me. get your ass back to me.â
Taemin is laughing out loud in his car. He puts his phone away & leaves the parking lot to drive to their apartment.
Itâs bigger than the one he used to share with Jinki, back in the days. Taemin likes it even more because they chose it together, decorated it together & most importantly, live there together. Taemin still feels overwhelmed with warmth every day when he comes home to the place he shares with Jongin & their dogs. When Jongin is there to welcome him & hold him close, itâs even better. But even when Jongin is away, for concerts, galas, or other work responsibilities, Taemin still likes to push the door open & see Jonginâs shoes in the entrance. He likes seeing Jonginâs mug in the kitchen sink. He likes laying on Jonginâs side of their bed.
It took them a while to be able to move in together. Taemin remembers how careful Jongin was at first... how nervous he was when he first told his fans that Taemin was his friend⊠how they had spent countless nights sharing their fears and comforting each other.
âso, itâs tomorrow.â
âYes, Jongin, I know,â Taemin tries to keep the anxiety out of his voice. No matter how many times he has reassured Jongin that everything will be fine, he canât help but feel nervous about tomorrowâs announcement.
âhow long do you think it will take them to recognize you?â
âI donât know. For those who follow me too, maybe an hourâŠâ
âare you sure youâre okay with that? once they know who you are, we can never take it back.â Though he tries to sound casual, Taemin can tell that this worries Jongin more than anything else, but he knows, even if Jongin doesnât, that he will never regret this decision. He turns around in Jonginâs arms and brushes his fingers against the otherâs cheek until his boyfriend meets his gaze. He holds it for a long moment before putting as much conviction into his voice as he possibly can.
âYes, Nini. Iâm sure.â
They took baby steps after that, each carefully planned by Jongin. They never came out publicly, but Taemin is practically certain that most of Jonginâs fans have figured things out. Jongin always says that Taemin is a friend, a very close friend, his very best friend, but Taemin knows that theyâve been reckless in public more than once.
âWhat are you going to do?â
ânothing,â Jongin answers calmly. âif someone asks, iâll tell them weâre friends, just as i always have.â
âWe donât look like friends.â Taemin gestures to the picture lying in front of them, a clear photo of them locked in a tight embrace.
âfriends hug. i hug my members all the time & no one says anything. well, they do, but no one takes them seriously. the same will happen with us.â Jongin sounds more confident than he feels, but he knows that Taemin isnât used to the press like he is & he doesnât want him to worry. Itâs not as though they can take it back so the best thing to do now is continue denying the rumors until the reporters get bored and leave them alone.
And they did. Eventually. Sometimes Taemin gets tired of being careful, of making sure never to kiss Jongin in public, but he knows itâs for the best. He also knows better than to complain about it to his boyfriend because no matter how reassuring he tries to be, Jongin still worries sometimes.
âthey know, you knowâŠmost of them, at leastâ
âOf course they know, Nini. Theyâre not stupid.â Taemin sighs as he prepares to repeat a conversation that he swears theyâve had a thousand times.
âmaybe we should just tell them.â
âJonginnie. You know we canât. It wouldnât just affect you. Think of your members.â
âi know,â Jongin sighs in frustration. âi just feel like such a liar sometimes.â
âHey,â Taemin keeps his voice soft as he runs his fingers through Jonginâs hair. âItâs not like you hide me completely... & you know itâs easier this way. You donât have to worry about it hurting your career or your dreams, & we get to be us.â
Jongin smiles at those words but keeps his eyes on their intertwined fingers. âitâs not fair to you thoughâŠâ
And Taemin knows that this is what heâs really worried about. He knows that his opinion matters more to Jongin than anyone elseâs. He turns Jonginâs head gently towards his to make sure that his boyfriend knows that he means what heâs about to say.
âI am perfectly fine with the way things are, Nini. Do I wish that I could touch you and kiss you in public? Sure. Do I wish that we could be open and not have to worry about being accepted? Of course I do. But this is the way things are right now, & Iâm okay with that. I would rather have this life that I live with you, secrets and all, than have our relationship be the thing that takes away your dream. I love you. And as long as weâre together, Iâm happy.â
Jongin trembles a little as he tries to hold back the tears threatening to escape his eyelids. He wants so badly to respond, but he doesnât know what to say so he pulls Taemin closer and presses their lips together with as much passion as he possesses, hoping that itâs enough.
Taemin smiles to himself as he gets off at the right exit, bringing him closer to the home he shares with Jongin. Having already let his mind wander to memories of their relationship, he canât help but think about when they first moved in together, smiling again when he remembers the first time Jongin saw his office.
A soft knock at the door brings Taeminâs attention to the man standing in the doorway with a mischievous grin on his face.
âlooks like someone has a favoriteâŠâ Jongin smirks as his eyes scan over the multitude of things with his face on them currently set around the room (he doesnât yet realize that his boyfriend has another box to unpack). Taemin blushes a deep red and looks down at the Jongin poster he had been about to hang up.
âLike you didnât already know,â he mutters without looking up.
âmhmm,â Jongin agrees, âbut i like to be reminded.â His smile is more genuine now as he enters the room fully. âwait, isnât this from this year?â he asks, holding up a piece of merch from the newest line.
âI canât help it.â Taemin pouts as his blush deepens, but his boyfriend just giggles.
âahhh, youâre so cute, taeminnie! the fans will love it when i make the apartment tour!â
âYah! Iâm not leaving this stuff up when you show your fans our place! We donât want them thinking your âroommateâ is a creep.â
Jongin just laughs, thinking about how happy he is. Finally, he gets to live with Taemin. Heâll get to see him more and take care of him better. Everything is working out for them. He was a little worried that Taemin would be annoyed at pretending that they were just roommates, but heâs been nothing but understanding, even borrowing Jinkiâs spare bed to put up for the video everyone said they had to make. Minseok did it when he left the dorm so now itâs Jonginâs turn.
âDo you think anyone believes that we're actually just roommates?â Taeminâs teasing voice pulls Jongin from his thoughts. Heâs long since stopped worrying about scandals, but he also knows how obvious they sometimes are.
âof course not,â Jongin scoffs. âbut it doesnât matter. at least things stay under control this way.â
Taemin hums in agreement as he feels strong arms wrap around his waist. He tilts his head up to look his boyfriend in the eyes and smiles contentedly. Heâs happy to be home.
As soon as Taemin gets home, Jongin has to fight their dogs to get to his boyfriend. But he likes it. They kiss & hug & Taemin showers while Jongin gets the chicken & prepares everything for a movie night. They end up snuggling together on their couch, talking about their days through half of the first movie.
Then Jongin hands Taemin an envelope. Heâs smiling like a kid & Taemin raises one eyebrow.
âWhatâs this about?â
Taemin opens the envelope to find two concert tickets & he grins & then kisses Jongin.
âYESSS!!! Damn, I feel like the last tour was forever ago!!â
âit was just last year...â
âIt felt like forever anyway. I donât need your opinion, Jonghyunâs going to agree with me.â
Jongin laughs loudly & Taemin shifts closer to him.
âIs there any news about your next solo album? Iâve also been waiting forever for thaaaat~â
Taemin freezes & suddenly pushes Jongin away to look at him with wide eyes.
Jongin stays silent & wiggles his eyebrows & Taemin looks offended.
âTell me! Tell me everything! Right now!â
Jongin laughs loudly & gets up to take their dirty dishes to the kitchen. Theyâve both completely forgotten that the movie is still playing.
âi canât, itâs a secret~~~â
âIf itâs a secret, then that means itâs happening, right? FUCKING FINALLY! Thereâs something to be secretive about!â
âJonginnie! Stop teasing me!â Taemin yells & follows Jongin to the kitchen. âLast time I asked, you said your solo comeback wasnât happening yet... so if you say itâs a secret now, then you know SOMETHING!â
Taemin presses himself against Jonginâs back, wrapping his arms tightly around his waist, & presses his face to his boyfriendâs shoulder blade & starts whining.
âNini, Iâm your sweet, lovely boyfriend. I deserve to know! Tell me everything!! What do we know already?â
âwe know that itâs confidential & even taeminnie canât have any information!â Jongin teases with a snort.
âOh my god, itâs really happening!â
Jongin chuckles & turns around to bump Taeminâs nose.
âi really canât say anything.â
His voice is soft this time & Taemin tilts his head with a small smile that looks cute at first but turns mischievous very quickly.
âWe both know Iâm going to get you to tell me everything. I have ways. You know it; I know it; everyone at SM knows it.â
âyeah, iâm counting on that...â Jongin whispers against Taeminâs lips.
He kisses him quickly & breaks their hug to turn and walk back to the living room, humming a soft melody that Taemin doesnât recognize. Taemin quickly follows, his eyes shining with intent at all the evil thoughts forming in his mind.