Just for this moment, I hope you won't think about learning something from me and hearing my story. I hope you will just realize how this person feels living that kind of life. I can't be your mentor, because I have a hard time to manage my own life. So what I can do for you is this. If you tell me how tough things are for you, I will tell you how things are worse for me. That way, you will realize that your life is not so bad after all. So I will just answer your questions.
"I don't know which one's more important. Is that what I want to do or what I'm good at doing?"
Everyone probably has this same question. I laughed because this applies to me too. Although I turned 40, what we do is the same, and we all worry about this. This is what I want to tell you. It's the same for all the animals in the world. You should be able to take care of yourself. If you can manage to feed yourself three times a day, at least twice a week, you have to allow yourself to do what you want to do. But usually, we think resting time is wasting time.
Lion is the king of the jungle, it's on top of the food chain, not because it can hit buffalo or kill buffalo. It's because he can comfortably lie down and sleep for hours when his enemies are all over. That's why he's the true king. So, in order to become strong, we shouldn't always push ourselves . Instead, we should rest well and not think of rest time as time wasted. It's hard, but you need to do that. I want to give this answer to the question.
"I was born with a lot of interest in women. For my success, I think I shouldn't fall in love. What's the most necessary thing to date a woman? Is it possible to study and to have a girlfriend at the same time? Do I have to give up dating when I have to study?"
If you think about this useless stuff, you can neither study nor date. From now on, I will tell you about love. You may think like this: "You will?" It's understandable where you're coming from. By the way, we say success is the stupidest teacher and that failure is the greatest teacher. Given that, it's hard to meet a greater teacher than me when it comes to love.
Is it possible to have study and have a girlfriend at the same time? There is a great chance that this person is currently not in a relationship. When you face your fear, it's much less scary than you thought. So it's better to just do it. And it's simple to confess your feelings to a person.
If you have the freedom to confess your love, that person has the freedom to reject you. Okay. Once you understand that, you're good. You have the right to confess, and [that person] has the right to refuse. Then you can stop worrying. Just go to anyone: "Hello, I [like] you." If [the person] goes, "What's wrong with you?" You say, "I got it" and just leave.
And what is the biggest benefit of doing this? If you confess your feelings, who is in charge of worrying now? It's the other person who is in charge. If we don't confess our feelings, who is to worry? It's me. So just make the others worry about it, and you focus on your things. Let them make the decision for you.
"What's the driving force of enduring a long time of hardship? "
This is a tough question. Actually, I get the most help from Jaeseok. Jaeseok always says this to me: "I would feel like that too if I were you." ... Empathy, more than criticism, gives you the opportunity to deeply examine yourself. That's the power of empathy. Looking for someone who will acknowledge you unconditionally is not being selfish; it's the human's most basic desire.
The best way to get over a hard time is not to push yourself harder so that you can get away from this life fast. It's to give yourself more time to rest. Then the anxiousness fades away. You might worry that you'll be resting for the rest of your life; but as long as you have one friend who can comfort you in times like that, you will be fine.
Someone asked me to teach how to make superiors like you.
If you were them, what kind of people would you like? You can be like those people.
"Do women really line up for you when you get a job?"
I can tell you two things. There is a great chance that this has nothing to do with getting a job. Carefully examine yourself. There is only one possible way to make this happen. You can get a job at a club. Ladies will line up every night...
What I want to tell you lastly is also something I want to tell myself. I think it's not important and fair to excessively blame yourself for what you have done. If you say "hello" to others, you should ask yourself if you're okay at least one hour a day. When your friend fails on an exam, you acknowledge that you know he tried hard and you take him out for dinner; but when you fail an exam, you say to yourself, "I saw it coming when you wasted time sleeping too much." You shouldn't say that to yourself.
Why? You know the best how hard you've worked for it. When you go home today, look at yourself in the mirror and call your name three times, and tell yourself that you're doing a good job. I won't tell you to cheer up. To a person who is struggling, "Cheer up" is the most abusive thing to say; and it's as useless as "Hello." I know it. I will sincerely cheer for you. Stay happy.
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