she/her, writes fanfics, aro/ace, mossy stones are like pillows I think, normal about sibling dynamics for normal reasons that make me scared of writing them,,,
So, it was the national day of Sweden today and I went to watch a marching band with my grandma and her partner and I noticed a van belonging to the military...
I can't believe I got jumpscared by a registration plate of all things....
Okay I know this is (most likely) a bot but like... the concept of it is really annoying me?
Like first of all, it straight up sounds like AI?? Like smooth and effortless feel? I've "put this together very well"?? On the first chapter??? (Also... the em-dash that I know doesn't appear automatically if you write -- in ao3)
Second of all, on the first chapter?? You're saying this about the first chapter??? Of more than a dozen??? I can clearly see it's the first and that (if it were a real person who wrote it) whoever wrote it most likely haven't read the rest of the fic!
Third of all, why is it negging me?? I don't want your advice for how to improve my fic and especially not, and I hate repeating myself, ON THE FIRST CHAPTER????
Also you're not getting me to a second location hello? I love it when people share their ideas and like things they hope to happen in my ongoing fanfics but do that by asking me on tumblr or writing it directly in the comments?? And don't make me personally ask you for it, I'm not gonna do that!
All of this to say that this shit feels so predatory. I know myself, I am confident in my writing and I know I don't want any thoughts "that could improve it even more". But that's me. Someone who is less confident in their writing and more unsure of themselves or, fuck it, lonlier than I am could actually fall for this shit! And I know that that's the whole point of a scam, to scare away the people who wouldn't fall for it by having grammatical errors or just sounding strange, but it's like really getting to me because the people falling for this would be people who just want to improve and who've now been negged into finding out what this oh so great though could be!!!
Anyway, I really do love comments that, you know, are real? It's really nice to see them, even if they're just a couple of words or just hearts they show that someone has appreciated my work enough to want to be extra clear with it and maybe share something they found extra interesting or funny or whatever. That's why I don't want to turn off the option of getting comments from anonymus folks! I seldom read when I'm logged into my actual account so I like it when I'm still able to leave a comment if I really like something! So it's annoying when I get a notification about one that is just a nothing burger (that's not even aimed at me or my fic because there's no way they even read it!) like this one :|
Hiii Sonia's joining us for this episode of Kazuichi being a damn moron...
But yeah chapter 14 of my Soudam fic If there's life, it's never too late has now been posted. "But Moss", you say, "posting this soon (within 3 weeks) is so quickly for you" and to that I say... you're welcome. Please clap
I come to thee with another 4600 words (oh god) of my Soudam fanfiction If there's life, it's never too late!
We're tackling the fourth chapter of the game in this one which is why it took a while to write oopsies (I am forever happy with my choice not to try to keep a schedule for my uploads 😅)
*throws ca 6k words at you* Hi, did you miss me? Here's Chapter 12!
This chapter was originally supposed to be a part of chapter 11 but uhhh they both got away from me. Enjoy Kazu being horny on main and suffering and also Gundham suffering a little, as a treat!
Today I bring you doodles in honor of my post game Komahina fic The memory of a sea hitting 500 (!) kudos. Tomorrow? Probably nothing :P
(Drawing isn't really my artform, but I doodled these while I had brainworms about my own damn fic and I think that's beautiful. Don't look at the proportions please and thank you ❤️)
Oh and see the alt text for bits of the scene they're each from (but don't if you don't want spoilers)!
Happy Valentines, I realized that I never posted this fic on tumblr and also that since this is a oneshot unlike most of my other fics I could just post all of it here, soooo… ta-da? Also, hey, the very very slight possibility of love suits in 2x2 is driving me insane 🙂
This fic of about 4k words is a rewrite/continuation of Kokichi’s love suit bc Shuichi wanted him to stay goddammit… There’s no smut though, only misunderstandings and hurt/comfort and unresolved romantic tension (because it is, as we all know, a dream and thus doesn’t have an explicit effect on canon… so yk)
*****
The room was slightly intimidating but mostly very tacky. Shuichi wasn’t exactly sure of where he was which could have been more unsettling but he did at least remember that it was supposed to be a dream. It probably followed... well, dream-logic. He hoped the whole thing wasn't indicative of anything going on in his subconscious, he was sure he'd never even seen several of the things filling the room before but they seemed like a lot. Not to mention the horse circling the bed, for whatever reason. And there, standing in the middle of the room...
Kokichi Oma.
He was supposed to play the role of his "ideal", like in a shared fantasy. He could only imagine how insane Kokichi's would be. Shuchi watched him for a moment, a little thrown off by the fact that he was both quiet and unmoving, but suddenly he turned, as if on some cue Shuichi hadn't heard, and locked eyes with him. The movement looked elegant and dramatic, like it was meant for someone wearing a coat or a cape. Shuichi wasn't sure if Kokichi imagined a different outfit or if Shuichi was just reading into it a little too much. Kokichi looked at him for a moment before breaking eye contact.
"Aw man, it's been awhile since I landed into trouble like this." he said with a bummed out expression and Shuichi told himself to focus. He needed to get this right, for Kokichi's well being. He wasn’t easy to deal with, but that didn’t mean he deserved to wake up in distress. Besides, maybe Shuichi could learn something about him.
"... Trouble?" he asked and Kokichi smiled cheerfully.
"Trapping me in a place like this... That's very like you, Mister Detective." he said, making it sound like an inside joke.
So I'm still a detective in this fantasy. Am I supposed to be chasing him?
But, a detective... That was... a strange coincidence. If he didn't know any better he would think Kokichi was messing with him, but that wasn't possible... right? He didn’t know it was a fantasy, right? Shuichi frowned but Kokichi started talking again before he'd managed to figure out what to say.
"But I won't tell you where I hid the stolen gem! Torture won't work either, y'know!" he said, smugly, and Shuichi blinked at him in chock.
"I-I'm not going to torture you! What exactly do you think a detective does?" he asked and Kokichi suddenly looked downcast.
"You're planning on tyin' and roughin' up my body, aren't you? That's why there's a bed, huh?"
Bed? Did he... did he see their surroundings the same way Shuichi did? But... He couldn't really imagine him not saying anything about the... other stuff in the room.
Wait, rough up???
He took a distressed step back, holding up his hands.
"N-No, no, you've got it all wrong!"
Kokichi smiled, way too casually for the subject matter.
"Eh? But isn't that what happens to a phantom thief when they're caught?" he asked innocently. Shuichi just felt more confused.
"A phantom thief?"
"But y'know... if you're into some craaazy kinks, even I won't be able to keep up." Kokichi said, ignoring Shuichi's flustered question entirely. Which was fine, because now there was a slightly more pressing question.
"I said, you've got it wrong–" he started, but...
No... wait a minute. We shouldn't be arguing... I'm in Kokichi's fantasy. I should calm down and play along.
He couldn't help but feel like he wasn't really living up to Kokichi's expectations. Not that he really knew what he was supposed to be doing, otherwise he would be doing that. Whatever it was. But... He was supposed to be a detective, right? So..?
"... I'm not gonna do anything to ya. From here out, you're the cops' problem. If you're tryin' to rile me up to give yourself a chance to escape... No dice, Kokichi." he speculated warily as he moved towards him. It sounded like something Kokichi would do, although his care-free smile neither confirmed nor denied that guess.
"Oh, figured it out already? Geeez, I was willing to let you do whatever you want to me... since I love you, Shuichi..." he said and Shuichi’s brain refused to process that for a moment, giving Kokichi enough time to continue, "But wow, you even researched my name! My identity is bare and naked, for your eyes only!"
Oh... whoops. Good thing Kokichi took that as a sign of his abilities as a detective rather than a sign something was wrong... But his name! Kokichi used his name!
"Kokichi... did you... just call me Shuichi?" he said and realised belatedly that it might already be an established fact that Kokichi called him by his name in the fantasy. But then..?
"Yeah well, looking up your name was a piece of cake!" said with another innocent looking smile but... Shuichi was just... Shuichi?
Ah, so I'm not a different person here. I'm me, and Kokichi is Kokichi...
He didn't... know what to do with that. And the other thing he'd said...
I know I'm supposed to be his ideal, but even when he tells me he loves me... I can't help but think he means the opposite.
It still made his heart beat faster. Kokichi suddenly got a mischievous look in his eyes.
"If you're not gonna do anything, then maybe I will." Kokichi said and then, before his mind even had a chance to process it, Kokichi's grin was upon him.
"Ah, hey!" he said, stepping back reflexively. He had no idea what Kokichi was capable of... But he smiled again, playfully.
"No need to be scared... What did you think I was gonna do to you?" he teased and Shuichi let out a sigh of... relief? No, it was too soon for that.
"Ah, I'm simply being cautious. We aren't exactly friends, Kokichi..."
... Are we? This whole situation is too strange for me to get my bearings. Having this kind of conversation only makes it harder to know why I'm here...
"Geez, don't be so cold to me. You've been chasing after me for so long. The stealing part doesn't excite me as much as being pursued by you, y'know? Don't you feel the same, Shuichi? You weren't bored playing with me, were you?" he said forlornly. Shuichi couldn't tell if that was just Kokichi acting like Kokichi or if he was actually supposed to be less... cold.
"Ah, well, I wouldn't say–" he said but got interrupted before he could say any more.
"Well, I don't care what you think anyway!"
Shuichi felt the sting of irritation and hurt (he didn't know what he was doing, he didn't know if all of this was just some elaborate set-up or if he was doing something wrong and Kokichi kept hiding what he thought despite the fact that it was his fantasy and–) and then he was talking without thinking it over first.
"... Because you just do as you please, don't you, Kokichi?" he asked but Kokichi just spread his arms with a cocky smile.
"Are you mad because I toyed with you? Don't worry. I'm always thinking about you! You're always trying your best to catch me. I really have to give it my all to win." he said as if he was trying to be reassuring. Mostly he just seemed unconcerned.
"You seem to be rather enjoying this... for a cornered criminal." Shuichi prodded. Kokichi kept smiling.
"Cuz the game's not over yet. Hey, Shuichi... What would you do if I told you that I wanted you to catch me?"
The smile turned into a smirk and Shuichi's brain buzzed unhelpfully.
"Huh?" he managed to squeeze out.
"There's a transmitter on my body, so my friends probably have this place surrounded already. Nee-heehee... looks like you'll be the one getting all tied and roughed up, Shuichi!"
"Th-That's not..." Shuichi started but then trailed off. It wasn't possible... right? It couldn't be. He was taken off guard by Kokichi's words, like usual, but then he remembered the roles they had. Kokichi was the one who was cornered. He straightened, looking him in the eye when he spoke, "Kokichi... your lies don't work on me."
"Aawww... you're not shaken up at all. I thought you would be more excited. That's too bad... I really wanted your eyes to be on me..." Kokichi said, pouting. Shuichi felt his cheeks getting warmer, despite himself.
"I thought... you didn't care about how I felt..." he said carefully. Kokichi fixed him with a startlingly blank stare.
"... That was a lie. Y'know... since I'm a liar." he said monotonously but then the smile was back, "But, when I said I wanted you to catch me... That was definitely not a lie."
"What do you mean...?" he asked and the smile dropped as quickly as it had appeared. The constant about-face was making him dizzy.
"It means... you can do whatever you want to me. And that's the truth. Come... Play with me... let's do a lot more together..."
His eyelids lowered and then he started moving towards him. Shuichi took a step back for every step Kokichi took forwards but was forced to stop when his feet hit the bed.
"Kokichi..." he protested, although he wasn't sure what exactly he was protesting against. It was just... Kokichi was moving too fast, getting too close, and the silence was unsettling. He seemed very serious, for once, and Shuichi didn't really know what to do with that. But Kokichi wasn't listening to him at all. He just pushed him, hard, onto the bed. Shuichi panicked, "Kokichi, wait! Wait!"
There was another second of silence, but this time Kokichi was still. Considering. His face was blank, again, and Shuichi was staring up at him. He didn't even dare to blink, afraid even the smallest movement might break whatever spell was on them.
"... Just kidding. Did I get ya?" he said finally, grin appearing once more. Shuichi felt shell-shocked, like his ears should be ringing. Or, maybe, the more accurate description was that he felt like one did when one had been outside in strong wind for a long time. Like his brain had flown right out of his head at some point while he was caught in the hurricane that was Kokichi Oma.
"What!?" he breathed but Kokichi didn't answer. Instead he turned on his heel and sprinted to the exit. Shuichi gasped, heart seizing at the thought of the door slamming shut behind him, "Kokichi, stop right there!"
He tried to give chase, but his knees were too weak to let him stand upright. Instead, he just tumbled off the bed. They were mortal enemies in this fantasy, but still, Kokichi couldn't be leaving...
I wish... he could stay? No, no, that was... no.
Kokichi was a mystery, through and through. Wanting to know more about him was only natural. It could be an advantage. And... Oh... This couldn’t be Kokichi’s fantasy! Shuichi was failing at something and Kokichi might have a nightmare! Shuichi couldn’t let him leave, he had been the one to put him in the situation they were in! So...
"Nee-heehee... that was pretty fun. See ya, Shuichi! I'll think of a more exciting game for next time. So make sure you excite me too." he said and as he turned towards the door with a flourish, Shuichi finally managed to get his legs under him and leapt towards him. He caught Kokichi's sleeve right before he placed his hand on the door and both of them paused, seemingly equally surprised at the action. Shuchi took a breath, still feeling slightly wobbly, and was surprised to see something wary in Kokichi's face. He leaned back a little, as to avoid towering over him.
"Kokichi, I don't understand what you want from me."
Kokichi stared at him and for just a moment his face was neutral again. Then he snickered, with a mocking tone to it.
"For a detective you sure are an idiot, Shuichi."
Shuichi looked away. He sure felt like an idiot.
"I-I'm sorry..."
"Welp, can't cure stupidity, right?" Kokichi said and shrugged, inching towards the door as he did. Shuichi tightened his grip on his sleeve and backed towards the bed again. He still didn't feel fully confident in his ability to stand up. Kokichi let him drag him to the bed and sit down, surprisingly, although he stayed standing.
"Would you please just... explain?" Shuichi asked quietly. Kokichi tilted his head as he snickered.
"Nee-heehee, at this point I'm not sure you'd even get an explanation through your thick skull." he said cheerily and then lowered his voice as he looked into Shuichi's eyes, "And, y'know, explaining it like you were five wouldn't work in this case, pervert."
Shuichi blinked up at him. Pervert? Then it hit him. It was like a wave crashing over him, information that had been building slowly beneath the surface was forced up once it hit the shore. A blush spread down his body just like water might and for a moment he could only gape up at Kokichi. Then he made another attempt at freeing himself and Shuichi's brain kicked back into gear. His grip on the sleeve tightened.
“Oh. You were propositioning me.” he said before realising that he would have to crawl down into a hole and wither away if he was wrong. The anxiety was amplified by Kokichi’s uncharacteristic silence.
"You got that now?" he asked, almost in disbelief, when he finally spoke again and before Shuichi had time to feel relieved his eyes filled up with tears and he started wailing, "Waaaaaah! Shuichi is so slow! I feel so bad for all of his dead brain-cells!"
Shuichi would have been more interested in the fact that he managed to pull a genuine reaction out of Kokichi if he wasn’t so embarrassed that he felt like he was dying.
"I'm sorry, I wasn't... But I..." he stuttered and Kokichi’s tears dried up as he got a disinterested look on his face, opting to look at his nails rather than Shuichi.
"Well, it doesn't matter anyways. You tooootally ruined the mood."
Oh, he... failed. Kokichi was going to leave unsatisfied (for lack of a better word)! And Shuichi still didn’t understand him at all. His chest squeezed painfully.
"I'm sorry, I..." he said, trailing off as he tried to calculate how far he was willing to go to please him. Startingly, he didn't really find a limit. His body felt warm.
"Eh, it was just a joke anyways." Kokichi said before Shuichi had made up his mind on what to say. Shuichi met his eyes.
"Was it?" he asked, although it sounded more like a statement. Though what Kokichi had said didn’t sound like a joke either, so he was in good company in that way. Another second of silence.
"... Who knows?" Kokichi said flatly before smiling and once again attempting to pull his sleeve out of Shuichi's grasp, "But, I'll get going now!"
"No, wait!" Shuichi said, grabbing his other hand when he nearly succeeded in escaping and Kokichi went still, for just a moment, before he started pouting.
"You're keeping me here against my will?" he asked, his eyes filling up with tears. Shuichi reacted without thinking again, pulled him closer and wrapped his arms around him. He only realised that the idea might backfire when he was already pressed against him. His clothes weren't all that soft, at least not on the outside, and Shuichi felt an urge to awkwardly fiddle with the various straps and buttons but he kept his hands clasped and his arms around Kokichi’s waist. He could hear Kokichi's heart beat rapidly against his cheek but he couldn't really tell whether it was his normal heart rate or elevated, he was too distracted to count. What he did know was that Kokichi wasn't moving and wasn't hugging him back. He felt more and more sheepish for every second but, well, he just had to commit at this point. After a while, a long while, Kokichi huffed out a laugh.
¨
"Shuichi, you're so weird! But... whatever. I get it, let go of me now." he said lightly. Shuichi almost did as he was told but... Did he? Shuichi barely got it himself, to be honest, so the odds of Kokichi getting it was... it wasn’t impossible, he was very perceptive, but it was unlikely.
"I don't think you do." he muttered and Kokkichi breathed out a put-upon sigh.
"You feel bad, right? Do you have memory issues, Shuichi? How's your object permanence? Did you hit your head on the floor? Cuz I already told you it was a lie!" he said mockingly. Shuichi shook his head.
"I won't let you go until you h-hug me back." he said hesitantly and Kokichi let out a scoffing laugh.
"Are you feeling sick? Y'know it's usually me doing the ultimatums, right?" he asked and Shuichi resisted the urge to hide his burning face in Kokichi's stomach. Kokichi squirmed... Not necessarily to get away but like he was... uncomfortable, maybe? It was hard to tell if he was genuinely trying to escape or not, though. Shuichi just kinda... kept his arms around him. Kokichi heaved a sigh, "Geeez, you're so clingy. Is that really why you've chased me for so long?"
He sounded annoyed.
"Caught you." Shuichi whispered, way too embarrassed to say it any louder, and he could hear Kokichi's breath hitch. But then Kokichi leaned forwards, just a little, and laid his arms around Shuichi's shoulders in a lukewarm hug.
"Alright, let me go now." he said and let out a squeak when Shuichi tilted backwards onto the bed. He sprawled on top of him with an 'oof' and Shuichi got to look him in the eyes again for the first time in a while. They were wide with surprise for just a moment before he broke their eye contact and looked disdainful, "If you wanted to get me into bed, there were easier ways to go about it."
"I... I did want to, I just..." Shuichi stammered and Kokichi glanced back at him as he propped his arms on Shuichi's chest and kicked with his feet in the air.
"But that's a lie. Who do you think I am? Someone who puts out on the first date? I'm hurt, Shuichi." he said, getting teary eyed again. But if he defined something like this as a date...
"Not the first..." Shuichi muttered, glancing away for a moment. When he looked back Kokichi was... blushing? Did he see that right?
"My friends are here, y'know?" he said, as if he was trying to change the subject. Shuichi wasn’t overly concerned about being captured, seeing as it was a dream.
"T-that's fine." he said. Kokichi gasped, scandalized.
"Eh? I didn't take you for an exhibitionist!" he said and Shuichi started stuttering, probably red as a stoplight.
"Th-that’s..! No, I..."
"Then you'd better do something worthy of exhibiting." Kokichi snickered, leaning closer. It sounded like a joke but, well... Shuichi's hand still found its way to Kokichi's chin. He grabbed it, gently, and Kokichi dropped his expression into the one that Shuichi had previously thought about as blank. Now, this close to it, he realised it wasn't. It was... sincere, maybe. Or maybe a bit overwhelmed. But more than that, it was earnest. Shuichi traced Kokichi's bottom lip with his thumb and Kokichi stared down at him in complete silence. His legs remained in the air but they'd stilled, now. Shuichi looked down at Kokichi’s lips and felt his mouth open in a quiet gasp he wouldn't have noticed if he didn't feel the air blow past his thumb. Their eyes met, briefly. His pupils were dilated but mesmering purple remained in a thin ring around the black. Then Kokichi’s dark eyelashes dipped as he looked down.
"Kiss me." he said and if he'd meant for it to sound like an order he failed completely. Shuichi still raised his chin and closed his eyes. Their lips met. It was indescribable, the feeling of just a parcel of Kokichi's trust and honesty and the warmth of his skin. He felt soft, all of him just felt soft. Kokichi gradually pressed him down into the mattress and Shuichi opened his mouth instinctively. Kokichi giggled against his mouth. It felt fitting. Shuichi wouldn’t mind hearing all of Kokichi’s laughs pressed to his skin. But then he drew away, with another giggle.
"... What?" Shuichi asked slowly, dumbly.
"Were you expecting tongue, Shuichi?" he asked as Shuichi blinked his eyes open. Kokichi was grinning again, but now there was definitely a blush on his face. Then he pouted, "How naughty, am I just another notch on your bedpost?"
Shuichi's gaze was drawn to Kokichi's jutting lip without him really meaning to so he forced it up to Kokichi’s eyes instead. It wasn’t much of a loss, they were beautiful.
"Ah, n-no, that... That was my first kiss." he said and Kokichi's eyes widened a little before he smirked.
"Hm... I guess I did steal something today, then." he said with a self satisfied air. Shuichi considered kissing away his smirk rather than continuing the conversation.
"What?" he said distractedly and the smirk widened.
"Your first kiss."
"Um..." Shuichi said awkwardly but then managed to pull his focus away from Kokichi's mouth for long enough to realise that his phrasing was suspicious, "What about the gem?"
"The gem?" Kokichi said, sounding confused for a moment before crossing his arms on Shuichi's chest and resting his chin on them with a mischievous sparkle in his eyes, "Oh, it's still in the museum. I guess the police are just reaaal bad at hide the object."
"Really?" Shuichi asked as he lifted his hitherto forgotten hands to rest lightly on Kokichi's upper arms. Kokichi smiled and cocked his head to the side.
"Mhm! It’s true! Hey, Shuichi... Did you know there's a hole in the bottom of the pedestal that the gem was on?"
Shuichi snorted.
"You hid it under the pedestal?" he asked, the thought probably more amusing than it should have been, and Kokichi blinked innocently.
"Hm? Who knows." Kokichi said, smiling at him. Shuichi started laughing but was quickly cut off by Kokichi once again leaning forward and kissing him. He hummed happily, train of thought completely diverted as he stroked up and down Kokichi's upper arms. It seemed to make Kokichi shiver even as his cold palms came up to cup Shuichi's face. He was gentle, as he tilted Shuichi's face and pushed closer to him. They kissed until Shuichi's head was swimming and even then they only came up for air and never got too far from each other, sharing each other's breath. His body on top of Shuichi’s felt like a weighted blanket. Shuichi felt calm, almost sluggish, as the tip of Kokichi’s tongue prodded at his lips and he opened his mouth again. This time Kokichi didn’t make fun of him, seemingly preoccupied with tracing Shuichi’s teeth with his tongue. Shuichi shivered, tilting his head further as he moved his hands to Kokichi’s sharp shoulder blades, pulling him down. He wanted to pull him close enough that there would be no distinction between them, absorb him into his ribcage. Kokichi gently bit his lower lip and his breath hitched again when Shuichi let out a noise.
He didn’t know how long it’d been when Kokichi drew further away, panting heavily. During the lull Shuichi noticed that their legs had intertwined at some point. The knowledge that Kokichi had to have been the one to, at the very least, lower his own legs if not intertwine them himself made Shuichi's heart hurt with affection. Maybe he wanted to be as close to Shuichi as Shuichi wanted to be to him. They were sharing their warmth now, although Kokichi’s hands were still pretty cold. The room was quiet and the bed was soft and Shuichi was sure he felt Kokichi’s heart beat, close to his own. He wanted to stay in whatever this moment was for a long time but he needed to see him, to make sure he was enjoying it too, so he managed to pry open heavy eyelids and became breathless once again at the sight of Kokichi's closed eyes and kiss-bruised lips. His cheeks were tinted pink and he was still. Calm. Trusting. Seeing him like that felt the same as having a small wild animal in your palms might feel. Like he was fragile and Shuichi had to do his very best not to accidentally drop him. It felt like a gift. A strand of hair had fallen down in front of his face, so Shuichi reached up a hand and carefully tucked it behind his ear. It was soft. Kokichi’s nose and eyelids twitched but he didn't open his eyes or say anything. He just breathed, and Shuichi couldn't keep his eyes off him.
It is important to me that Makoto never (as far as I can recall ) refers to himself as the Ultimate Hope.
Like everyone else can do it and they should but Makoto himself shouldn’t and if he’s gonna call himself an Ultimate it’ll be for Luck not Hope.
Because Makoto doesn’t really think of himself like that. In his mind he’s just this average guy who got lucky… and then horrible shit happened.
He doesn’t think he’s better than anyone or that he’s special or unique in any way.
Makoto is very humble, very down to earth in a way a lot of his peers aren’t. A lot of them grew up with these beliefs that having a talent makes them superior to those around them.
Some more so than others.
I mean even Kyoko who’s probably the most grounded of them says (while rescuing Makoto from the rubbish pit) that it was important for her to survive the killing game because of her talent.
Having a talent means something to them in a way it doesn’t to Makoto. He is very much the antithesis of his world that puts so much importance on that.
So it I feel that it’s very in line with his character to not suddenly give himself a new title. But rather something others project onto him, to make him this symbol and beacon for hope.
Rather than anything Makoto would claim for himself because yeah he fights for hope but he’s not the only one. He’s not some kind of hero he never would’ve gotten so far on his own.
That’s just the kind of person he is and I don’t ever see him referring to himself as that.
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