this fanfiction shit easy
dirt enthusiast
trying on a metaphor

tannertan36
Show & Tell

Andulka
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
No title available

Product Placement
almost home
NASA
Not today Justin
occasionally subtle
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Three Goblin Art
styofa doing anything
One Nice Bug Per Day
Monterey Bay Aquarium

Janaina Medeiros

JVL
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom

seen from Mexico

seen from Russia

seen from Italy
seen from Canada
seen from Jordan
seen from Italy

seen from Germany

seen from Brunei
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from Italy

seen from Malaysia
seen from Italy
seen from Australia

seen from Brunei

seen from Germany

seen from Türkiye
@mossboner
this fanfiction shit easy
Got that fantasy bleach job
HOW ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO PUNISH A KNIGHT WHO BLUSHES AND SMILES EVERY TIME YOU TRY
listen, if i didn't respond with a blushing "as you wish, my lady" and squirm a little about it then what kind of loyal knight would i even be?
YOU COULD AT LEAST PRETEND THAT YOU DONT LIKE IT
Our girlfriend looks so pretty from outer space
I find it funny how most working dog breeds are pretty cut-and-dry, they do exactly what it says on the label, but with hunting dogs it gets all No Such Thing As A Fish.
Like herding dogs herd, right? And shepherd dogs herd sheep. They make the flocks move where you want them to go. Some nip at their heels, some just use scare tactics, but their whole job is to make the flocks move. They run around them going hehe get relocated, idiots.
Guard dogs guard. Sure there's the patrolling alarm dogs whose whole job is to go around and supervise that nothing is out of place, and there's the four-legged security guard type that make sure that either the intruder leaves the premises on their own or with several limbs removed, but the principle is still pretty simple. This Is My House, My People, Our Livestock, And You Can Fuck Off.
But hunting dogs? Are we talking about the mushy temperament eager-to-please soft-mouthed retriever who can hold an egg in their teeth without breaking it? A bear dog that fucks off into the woods to find big game the size of a truck and then barks to keep it in place until the hunter with a gun can get there and deal with it? The noble dachshund that is specifically tube-shaped and audacious-natured in order to bolt into tunnels to go badger a badger in its own damn house? Or a pointer, who points.
My boyfriend's family's dogs are a very rare seal hunting breed, that are no longer used to hunt seals. They make pretty good alarm dogs, though, and for breaking your ear drums.
Or do you mean greyhounds, who seem to do very little, unless you turn you back on them for 2 seconds and they see a rabbit. By the time you look back, they are gone
"Greyhounds are very active, high-energy dogs" is actually a statistical error. Most of the time, greyhounds don't do jack shit. The 2 seconds every day when they get an energy spike and bolt, running at the speed of light to slam face first into a wall, are an outlier adn should not be counted into the average speed.
autumntides
10h
"In the instance an employer makes an illegal request for a photograph as part of a job application, you may submit a complaint to the United States Equal Employment Opportunity Commission." Successful violation fee collections are paid partially to the one who suffered the violation, which in many cases exceeds a year of work at these shit jobs. There's only two weak points to a corporation, and those are in the budget and in the supply chain. Hit them where it hurts.
Fucking word.
Learn your rights!
AUTO REBLOG IN CASE YOU MISSED THIS THE 1ST TIME AROUND. It is important to KNOW YOUR RIGHTS.
Mark is not a masochist, he just wanted to be flung around multiple times, break his nose, get hospitalised from getting blood in his eyes and almost drown in a pool of blood to see how much he can handle for a film.
what could possibly be in there
growing up i never understood why people call vegan food bland because a lot of my family is vegan and i like their cooking just fine. but today i had a vegan burger from a fast food place that was using imitation meat and imitation cheese and imitation mayo and yeah it tasted fucking: Bad. an uncanny burger of lies and deceit. a burger with burger envy. like it couldnt embrace the fact it wasnt a real cheeseburger and was thus living a lie to appease its strict burger parents. you want good vegan food you need the stuff thats meant to be meat-free from the ground up. eat a delicious rice and bean bowl with me. take my hand. there is a better world.......
ITS NOT A GENDER METAPHOR DONT MAKE ME FEEL SYMPATHY FOR THE MEDIOCRE FAST FOOD BURGER
I had a dream that Joe Biden kept trying to sneak back into the white house to become the president again and he had a variety of silly disguises like in one he was wearing a big moustache and top hat and introduced himself as Job Iden and tried to sell trump snake oil and trump was super interested until his moustache fell off and then JD vance was like "wait a minute.. that's joe biden!!" amd he was like "welp, gotta run, see ya later jack!" and then all the evil white house staff were shaking their heads cus joe biden almost sneaked into the white house and the newest aid was there and she was like "That was a close call, Mr President" and his new aide was actually kamala harris wearing a big cartoon wig and they were all too distracted by joe biden to notice
Frank and Julie have Girl Time but in a 'Girl as a unknown Noun' kind of way:
Julie, cheerfully: Girl Time, Frank! Frank squinting his Eyes at her: What Kind of Girl Time, Julie. Julie: Girl Time! (Getting ready to hurl a bowling Ball at Frank like a baseball)
Frank: I hate Girl Time. (Wearing a catcher's mitt and bracing for Impact)
Person who's listened to 10 Will Wood songs: Yeah I think my favourite definitely has to be Against the Kitchen Floor
Person who's listened to 100 Will Wood songs: Oh god no I'm not into any of that overrated stuff. You gotta listen to Bob Zmuda v. James Carrey off the original TRWW album or maybe Front Row Seats from his Jamface days
Person who's listened to 500 Will Wood songs: Yeah I think my favourite definitely has to be Against the Kitchen Floor
Sounds hot
theres a whole album of song titles you can make just from the words of this tweet
check out my next stoner metal ep, featuring such classics as:
Marijuanification
Complete Derangement
Stoned Sex Drive
Derangement Manifests a Literal Sex Demon
Monstrum Incarnate
Narcotic Parody of Sex
this makes smoking weed sound so much cooler than it is
new sayings: "dont jerk off with the devil" - dont do something awesome "Hand me a pail of horsewater" - I want to try the horsewater No other sayings were invented this year
the cici's pizza mr pibb hits different
could you make up some more words please :)
wawa gobbler
belly laughing while sloshing my chalice around in my many ringed hand