kami

diva with 18 years of histrionic experience

[moxlay]

you’re so so mean. i never wanted to like you. i don’t like liking you.

[moxlay]

i only see you smiling to me in my dreams, the only way i can still hug you. i wish i could never feel your warmth again, please don’t make me want you.

[stalgivc]

find opportunities accept rejection and do it all over again

[going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi]

honestly yall just gotta be comfortable reading books that make you feel stupid

[going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi]

read books that you don't understand. read books where you have to pay attention. read books that make you reread a page eight times to figure it out. read books that you need to take notes on. read books with words you have to google. read books that don't make sense without research on the setting. read books that make you feel stupid because otherwise you'll just be stupid.

[moxlay]

i dont need to prove my worth to someone who already overlooked it

[moxlay]

i’m not even sure if what i’m doing is what I want to be doing. i feel like without other people in my life and a desire to constantly get better just to get to their level i actually don’t have any internal motivation for doing things that i’m doing. it feels like i just don’t want to stay behind but i am still behind and i have some vague goals and dreams that i’m trying hard to achieve but then idk if it’s actually what i’m supposed to be doing, or it’s just something that i want to do at the moment to stay with my friends and not lose anyone in my life that i’m so attached to.

[moxlay]

i really don’t think about the outcome, i’ll just do it to do it. then in the moment i’ll probably regret it.

[moxlay]

and i dont want to force myself into idgaf’ing. i do gaf. and i’ll continue gaf because why would i run away from my emotions or blame myself for feeling a certain way??

[moxlay]

i think i’m really cool

i actually do think i’m really cool

even though i will walk around thinking ‘i hate myself,’ devaluing all my work, comparing myself with others and etc., etc.

in the end of the day, my life is mine to live, and i will never regret again for trying, i will not step outside feeling embarrassed and pathetic for losing, and i will not let any experience define my worth… i literally don’t have anything to lose.

i am already proud of myself for trying, for not giving up, for being brave and honest and staying true to myself, i don’t think i should let anyone or even myself to ruin it for me. if i will let myself get into something and do something i better finish it off. i think i’m already very cool for that.

[moxlay]

[moxlay]

[moxlay]

[weltenwellen]

Joy Sullivan, from “At the Airport”, Instructions for Traveling West

[moxlay]

2025

in:

green tea

filtered cigarettes

swearing

tumblr blogs

aritzia

hedonism

indigo and pomegranate colors

no makeup lashes combo

lace and silver

bralettes

journaling

scarves and funny hats

yogurt bowls

investing into intimacy

letting people have their own perception on things (and me)

bw outfits

scale

crocs

coming late

starvation as salvation

out:

mcdonalds & tacobell

procrastination

3% milk

tiktok as a browser

air dried hair

chatgpt

alcohol

iced latte

h&m

basket ice cream

internet debates

purging

instagram prompts and notes in general

cheap jewelry

micellar water and dry shampoo

gambling addiction

silent mode off

[cigz]

[godspreciousdaughter]

I just wanna focus on being a full human being. The plague of comparison is so insane and can play out so quietly. The reality of idolising things or making them seem out of reach is genuinely the most insane thing in the world, like this has never led to anything besides disappointment. There is nothing outside of your experience that is better than what you have. Ever. Someone else’s joy isn’t more joyus than yours. I am full and looking no where else

[moxlay]

I was crashing but I saw you reblogged a post I made... I feel very happy now thank you hope you have a good day and at least 3 of your enemies explode soon

omg bb ilysm i hope there will be more reasons to be happy about soon