Session Twelve - Monthend
Among the entrails of a giant lizard creature and an undead Dragonborn, the victorious party stands. The skies have cleared, and off to the south, a huge tower stands - Monthend.
This is a matter for tomorrow, though, since cleaner-turned-publican-turned-mayor Tiatha Rowe is standing in the doorway of the Jaunty Skinner, furious about the gore that slicks her entryway. She fetches buckets, mops and brooms, and gets Normal Leg Barty on the case.
Oddsock is discomforted by the idea of cleaning and hides himself behind some barrels, but Julius mucks in with gusto, using his druidic magic to help sluice the worst of the detritus away from the pub.
Once everything and everyone is looking cleaner, Tiatha locks the pub doors, fetches all the bedding from upstairs, and invites everyone to enjoy ale and food on the house. Barty fetches out a roasted two-faced pig from the back, along with some grilled fish for Julius.
A squeak is heard from Oddsock’s pack, and beside him appears two barrels, both marked in Infernal with their names - Elvish Juice and Jackies’ Hammer. Accompanying them is a letter - also in Infernal - and a little bag of treats. Oddsock wolfs down the treats before reading the letter, which is just as well, since that is what the letter instructs him to do.
The treats taste of Oddsock’s favourite meats - a mixture of imp and beholder flesh - barbecued and mixed with a variety of warm spices. He feels a pleasant burn in his throat, which gives way to a gentle tingle of power.
Barty, spotting the barrels, fetches them over to the bar and taps them. The sheer number of revellers proves to be a problem, however - the pub is short three clean mugs.
X produces her bejewelled Cup of Sune, and Oddsock his iron dog bowl. Talion, after a moment, remembers the simple wooden cup in his pack, and produces it.
Barty - a man of the world who has seen many a magical thing - feels sure he recognises the cup, and asks for one of the party’s potions. Filling the cup, he passes it to the clearly wounded Freginald. Supping it down, the burly fighter reports that the potion seems to be at full potency. Furthermore, he can sip what he needs from the potion, and leave the rest for another person.
At this time, what he needs is the whole lot, so he chugs it down before getting an ale.
Oddsock, meanwhile, has a chew on his dragon toy Tim, and requests an audience with his patron in his domain, rather than just at the edge of unreality. It’s his first time in his patron’s lair, and he finds it rather comfortable - a small bar with a single beer pump dominates one wall, while the rest of the cosy space is bedecked with cushions and low tables, with howling dog head lanterns on the walls, spitting balls of fire from their mouths.
The two enjoy a nice chat over a fresh IPA, while Oddsock quizzes the black-robed figure about various things - mostly about the meanings of terms like “core competencies” and “vertical integration”. The patron is unsure, and advises him to seek out a more evil being for these answers.
Back in regular reality, Julius carves a couple of his pebbles - one in the likeness of Barty, and the other as he imagines X’s goddess Sune. Both turn out quite well, and he decides to offer them up as parting gifts in the morning.
Talion, meanwhile, begins a new composition - a stirring number that details the events from his arrival in Dogwood to the final defeat of Slathiel. Even at these early stages, it is a fine song, and one that will doubtless get even better with successive renditions.
Kadis sits apart from the fun, contemplating the gear that was planted in his hand by mysterious forces. It is made from a smooth material, with a suggestion of unknown magics. In this respect, it is just like the egg that hangs next to his idol, but he feels no connection to it.
The drinking and eating continues with much joyous revelry, until the air is filled with the sound of steam-powered hooting. Aberron - who had secreted himself in a corner with the remains of his brass owl Dominique - holds aloft his repaired companion, who spreads her wings in celebration.
The night draws on and the food and ale dwindles until nothing remains but sleep. Oddsock gets the best place for himself - right by the hearth, in a pile of racoons.
The party has strange dreams of a creepy house filled with unknowable horrors, though Kadis finds that his usual writhing tentacles are confined behind a locked door.
After a moment, he finds himself on the other side of that door. Before him is a single, glowing egg. A dark tentacle slinks up and around it, clutching it tighter and tighter until the shell breaks.
Then, he sees a face. Though it is older by some margin than the last time he saw it, it is definitely his own, with the strip of material bound around his eyes.
After a couple of minutes, he comes to a realisation:
He is no longer asleep.
As he reaches up to touch his face, his vision blurs and skips, until he can see himself from an elevation, lying on the inn floor with his friends.
Taking a moment to gain his bearings, he begins to move to where he believes the vision is coming from. Understandably disoriented, he stumbles over Julius, who awakes with a hiss and a grumble.
Assisting each other, the two find the source of the visions - a tiny little floating green ball with a single eye in the middle, and four miniscule flickering tentacles.
Based on their encounter at Mansion de Mortesque, Julius identifies it as a beholder - probably a newborn, and much more alive than the one they fought before.
Julius gives Kadis a once-over, and finds nothing new or different about him that would explain his connection to the creature. He does, however, notice that the mysterious idol is gone, and shards of it are across the monk’s chest. The only thing that remains on Kadis’ necklace is the egg that was once a black-green lantern.
Feeling the bond with this creature, Kadis holds out his hand and beckons it to him. It floats warily over, before nestling into his palm and purring gently. Julius takes copious notes, and observes that the beholder’s connection to Kadis is similar to his own link with the fey weasel Rupert - who, upon hearing his name, pops up from under Julius’ potato sack robe, squeaking curiously.
By now, the rest of the party has awoken. After a series of disgruntled borks, Oddsock accepts the new arrival, though Talion remains unimpressed. The baby beholder, a little overwhelmed, tucks itself into Kadis’ clothes, peeking out with its little bulbous eye.
Now that the sun has risen, Tiatha unlocks the doors and Barty brings out the breakfast - porridge, and eggs in various styles from a farm in the north. Oddsock tucks in to the eggs, and Julius enjoys the porridge, though Kadis and Talion are rather more wary.
After breakfast, Julius hands over his carved pebbles to their intended recipients. Barty is moved almost to tears by the gift, but he keeps his cheeks dry through the sheer power of swarthiness. X is also delighted, though she does mistake the woman in the carving for Em. In either case, she is enchanted.
And so, the time comes for departures. Aberron and Freginald decide to stay in Dogwood to pursue their new trades of artificery and tattoo artistry respectively. 38/12 also opts to stick around for a while to assist Aberron with his research into… whatever 38/12 is.
X and Gyder, unsurprisingly, decide to move on, having unfinished business elsewhere. Barty also chooses to leave, to return home to his Polly - the most beautiful bird there ever was. To fill his post at the Skinner, Tiatha recruits Dandy Bianco, former castle guard and horse testicle enthusiast.
Also leaving town today, though with very little fondness, is Eno Greysect. Tired of his home being pissed upon and his nose being punched upon, he hangs up a sign reading “God Does Not Live Here” and strides miserably south.
Oddsock, naturally, changes the first word to “Dog” as he trots over to bid farewell to the Jackies. His firm raccoon friends have committed themselves to keepings Oddsock’s beers brewing, and will share the profits next time he visits. They also ask that he spreads the word of Dogwood to the Monthenders, so they they can grow the town and eventually start a proper Chamber of Commerce.
Oddsock agrees, and wonders how long it will be before the Jackies become mayors of the town. Jackie Face mulls this over with a peculiar look upon his face while Oddsock exits cheerfully, a four pack of new raccoon-made health potions in his pack to share with the party.
Having bid farewell to their new friends, the party leaves town. Then, after a moment, they return, having forgotten that they have two horses. Then they leave town.
On the way to Monthend, a couple of things break up the journey. Firstly, as evening draws in, the team arrives at the southern farm - the journey being much quicker with horses and without displacer beasts.
As they arrive, they see a familiar, unconscious Dwarf being loaded into a wagon, and being shuttled off to Monthend. Apparently, last night, an undead Dragonborn burst out of the ground, shouting about a monk that had stolen his lantern, startling former trading post manager Grum Swabspud half to death.
The party feigns ignorance as they join the farmers for some simple food (no porridge) and some beds for the night.
Shortly after departing in the morning, they encounter a group of mounted High Elves, on their way to investigate the town that had suddenly appeared in the woods around (and owned by) Monthend. Embracing the opportunity to quiz some of the new town’s residents, they join the group on the road to Monthend.
Many questions follow, most of which are answered by another stirring rendition of Talion’s new song. The Elven guards vow to pass on the information - especially the addition details regarding new trading opportunities with several individuals named Jackie.
At the gates of Monthend, a miserable little horse administrator takes down the details of their steeds so they they can be kept in the stables until they leave. When asked for the names of their horses, the team freezes - they never named them. Fortunately, Oddsock uses his broken knowledge of Domestic Animal to speak to them and ask them.
Turns out they’re both called Horse. Who would’ve thought?
After receiving a receipt made out to group leader Mr O Sock, the adventurers find themselves in the luxurious, high-end sprawl of Els’ unofficial capital, with nothing on their schedule. This can mean only one thing…
Shopping!
Over the next couple of hours they put some serious damage into their communal funds. Kadis purchases a new cloth to cover his eyes - one that can be carefully adapted to secrete an infant beholder, with a little slit for it to peek out. Julius also opts for clothes, but something in a thicker hide than his current clobber.
Talion and Oddsock have their sights set on something more magical. The dog goes sniffing around for magic ink, to transfer some Necromantic cantrips from the Mortesque books to his magical codex, while Talion attempts to chat with girl at the counter - a surly High Elf of no more than 90 years, with a tag that reads “Hello! My Name Is NUNYA”
His conversational gambits are rebuffed, so he tries a little magical charm. Suddenly, a crystal on the counter flashes with a lightning bolt that he barely avoids, and the girl taps a little sign on the counter which says “Do Not Charm The Staff”
Chastened, he browses the shelves an finds a copper bracelet within his price range, which slightly improves his weak constitution. The High Elf rings up the sale with the same sullen disposition, tapping the sign reading “Do Not Bother The Staff” when Oddsock demands to speak to their raccoon.
Threats to speak to a supervisor follow, and the girl taps her Supervisor badge, and then a sign simply reading “No”. The two leave the shop under a cloud, but take their revenge in their signature ways: Talion playing a vicious polemic about poor customer service upon his lyre, while Oddsock pisses in the doorway.
On their way to rejoin the others, Kadis and Julius encounter a harried tabby Tabaxi trying to wrangle two kitten-aged Persians out of the gutter where they’d found a rat, whilst also pushing a third kitten in a pram. Julius goes over to introduce himself and offer assistance, but the Tabby panics and ushers her young charges away.
The group as a whole is a little put out by their experiences in Monthend, but a little cheers follows as a crow-like Kenku rounds the corner, shouting about happy hour at The Wayward Alchemist. He hands the group some flyers filled with food and drink offers, and they notice a sign around his neck reading “I Repeat Your Message For One Gold A Day.”
Julius and Talion try to engage him in conversation, but all he does is repeat what they say back at them. Realising what is going on, Talion pens a short missive, hands the Kenku a gold coin, and reads aloud:
New trade routes have opened up to Dogwood! Come and visit the best new town in Els!
The Kenku pauses, then repeats it word for word, before offering them a chance to change the message if needed. Most of the party members are satisfied, but one adds “Presented By Oddsock” to the message before accepting the final draft.
The Kenku waddles on, alternating between his new Dogwood message and the one for The Wayward Alchemist.
Since they are now at a loose end, and since the position of the sun as it descends behind a clock tower suggests that it is now happy hour, the party decides to check out this tavern.
The handy map on the back of the flyer leads them out of the well-heeled streets of central Monthend, and into the less salubrious (though still adequately-heeled) outskirts.
Oddsock takes a minor detour after spotting a church of Commerce on the mini-map, and after sullying their windows with magically hurled dog eggs, soiled curtains and anti-capitalist propaganda runes, he skips cheerfully along to join the rest of the crew.
The Wayward Alchemist is a large, stone building, with a large, stone doorman. Julius introduces himself, and the Golem returns the greeting, indicating the name carved into his chest: Stopdick. He opens the door for the party, and they enter.
The interior is bustling with customers enjoying two-for-one Jinn & Tonics, and waiting staff in very little clothing. Kadis and Oddsock are slightly overwhelmed, but Julius takes in every detail with great clarity, from the fancy High Elf at the bar, to the stern Tiefling standing before a door at the back, next to a wide flight of stairs leading up.
As Julius heads off to introduce himself to the Tiefling - having never met one before - Talion regards the place with a lesser eye for the details, but a greater understanding. With liquor in the front, and probably poker in the back, plus several scantily clad servers, he does the mental arithmetic and comes up with the most likely answer: brothel. With a sly smile, he heads for the bar.
As he does, Julius engages in conversation with the Tiefling, whose name is Tabitha. He boldly asks what she is, and she informs him that she is a bar manager, which Julius takes questionably accurate note of. She asks if he plays cards, and, accurately judging the confusion on his little otter face, guides him gently towards the safety of the bar.
Down at the other end, Talion tries to gain the attention of a barman, but instead attracts the High Elf, who introduces himself as Herrington. Pointing to the dragon scale on Talion’s necklace, he sidles in close and tells him that he and his friends are hunters too, and may have take down a dragon or two themselves.
Unable to stop himself, Talion prepares to take a swing at Herrington, and is stopped at the last moment by a pressure on his elbow. Beside and somewhat below him stands a very glamourous Halfling carrying a bottle of aged Goodberry wine on a tray. She tugs at his arm insistently, and guides him back over to his friends, and then over to a nice quiet table at the back.
She introduces herself as Zanthia, and drops off the bottle on the table, along with four glasses. She says that they are on the house - better than the watered down Happy Hour swill - and that she has a lot to talk to them about after her performance..
Before they can ask any questions, they are interrupted by a drunken hand across Zanthia’s buttocks. A leering customer demands that he go and fetch him another drink - which, with a barely perceptible flash of something across her eyes, she does.
She then takes to the small stage at the far end of the bar. Throughout the room, the candles dim, save for those that illuminate her. Fetching up a saxophone from beside the stage, she performs a slow, haunting number - one which Talion finds strangely familiar.
The tempo has been slightly adjusted, and the key is different, but there is different, but there is no mistaking it - The Ballad of Araniel: his signature composition.
Once the applause has died down, Zanthia returns to the table and invites the group to join her upstairs for a private conversation. She knows who they all are, and needs their assistance.
The party remains silent - a silence only broken by the lecherous customer behind, as he snores face down into his drink.
I’ve been playing D&D for the first time, ably guided by @welcometoels. Not only that, he’s been writing up the session notes after every time we’ve played, and letting the story unfold in blog form as well as over Discord. This is a stonker of an entry, but definitely start from the beginning if you want to read the whole saga so far.
