The Day that Changed it All
In the darkest night, who will stand with us? Who will champion us when we cannot champion ourselves?
Oct 24 started out just as any other day but quickly turned into a nightmare.
My mother has battled with depression, self doubt and crippling loss of self worth for a long time.
She came close to losing that battle when she lost control of her emotions and those feelings led to her taking over half a bottle of unknown pills. In those moments, she turned at first to anger then rage.
This will always be a painful moment, a scar upon the lives of our family, but it was not the darkest moment.
And this is why I feel her story NEEDS to be told.
The second I learned my mom had taken a large amount of an unknown substance, I forced her into the car rushing to seek aid at the place all of us turn to in such dire straits, the Emergency Room.
After relaying all I knew about a bottle of pills, which we believe consisted mainly of diltiazem, my mother was taken back into their trusted care.
Safely delivered, I felt I could shift my attention from the woman who gave me life, to that of my disabled father. Unable to walk, he was left behind in the rush for my mother. I only sought to collect him and return so both of us could be with her. I informed the receptionist of my intentions to be back as quickly as possible, and reassured my mother would be safe I rushed off to reunite my family during this struggle.
Upon returning to the Emergency Room, I was greeted with a sight that stunned me to my very core. My mother who was suppose to be receiving treatment was being escorted out in cuffs by officers. I was informed of my mother’s refusal to change and of an altercation with a staff member in the less than ten minutes I had been gone.
The staff member accused my mother of grabbing their collar (my mother denies this). This incident was enough for those who could help her to abandon the woman in need. Her mental status unquestionably not sound and her actions not of the noble caring woman who loved her family.
Both my father and I found ourselves begging both the police and the hospital itself for help, seeking for an understanding that she was not well by any means and that every moment passing could be doing untold harm. Despite our pleas, the staff and officers ignoring any protest or challenges to what was right or wrong, my mother a US Air Force Veteran was discharged, dumped and refused life saving treatment.
No matter what we shared of the woman’s sacrifice, the love she had given, the pain she had suffered it fell on deaf ears and was not taken into account. They only had fear and anger at a fifty one year old woman in cuffs. All while she was tempting fate each second a treatment was delayed.
Our mindset shifted from how can they help, to where can she GET help and that was the last hope we had. Soon an agreement was made, with a punishment of a fine for disorderly conduct to be given and a required appearance in court the next day in return for release unto our custody.
From there we raced to the next Hospital, the closest ER to get her the help she had been denied now for over and hour. Each moment in that car was more painful than I can explain in words, as I struggled to keep my mother awake knowing that should she pass out her body might give up.
I am happy to say she did make it, she got treatment and I am ETERNALLY grateful to the individuals at the other two hospitals who gave my mom back to me.
No matter what happens, I will do everything I can for her and for our family but I can not deny how horrible this was.
I do not understand how an Emergency room could refuse a life in danger. How police would not strive to get her treatment, and most of all how a Doctor who swore a oath would abandon a woman in such need.
How is this right? How is this allowed?
My hope is no one should ever face the nightmare we did that evening. No one should ever beg for a loved ones life.
This conversation needs to happen. Our veterans, our families, should not be treated in this manner. Only by talking about it, can we even begin a movement to fix the underlying issues in our healthcare system.
Thank you for reading our story.
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areudirty
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