Kanda did not do touchy feely shit. That, Gojyo knew. The man had antisocial behavior down to a fine art. At least when they were in public. He didn't talk much. When he did it was maybe one syllable. He talked a bit more around his friends, maybe saying whole sentences. I know, the horror.
But when they were alone? Gojyo found that Kanda wasn't quite so uptight. He talked more, laughed, smiled, joked around a bit, and didn't react poorly to physical contact. In fact, he tended to initiate such things.
It was Halloween and they were stuck at home due to a freak snowstorm that had started sometime early that morning and still hadn't stopped. The heat was on but the house wasn't that warm and Gojyo found Kanda sitting on the couch in a sweater and a mug of hot tea watching it snow. "Aren't you cold?" Gojyo asked. He himself was wearing his coat for lack of anything warmer to put on.
"Not really," Kanda said. Gojyo flopped down beside him, pulling the blanket from the back and the couch and draping it over his lap. Complete opposite of what he'd just said, Kanda scooted over and leaned against Gojyo. The redhead smirked and wrapped his arm around the younger man.
"Liar," Gojyo murmured. Kanda stuck his tongue out at him before taking another sip of his steaming tea. Gojyo looked absently out the window, noticing how the red orange of the leaves was being smothered by the white of the snow. It was like the last glowing embers giving way to ash. That thought was kind of depressing and Gojyo sighed, shaking his head.
"What?" Kanda asked, leaning back so he could look at Gojyo's face better.
"Nothing," Gojyo said. "I just thought it was depressing how the leaves gave way to snow like embers to ash."
"But from the ash the world will grow anew," Kanda said, curling up against Gojyo again. Gojyo gave him a sidelong glance and smirked.
"Who knew you were a poet?" Gojyo joked.
"Not a poet," kinda grumbled. He leaned forward to put his tea on the table before moving to straddle Gojyo’s lap. "You," he poked Gojyo in the chest, "are cold."
"Hey!" Gojyo complained.
"Stop that," Kanda scolded. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Gojyo's lips. "Stop being cold," he muttered into the kiss. "It isn't like you."
Gojyo wasn't sure if he had ever been this drunk before. As soon as he stood up from his chair in the bar his stomach had started to do back flips. As he staggered home he continually needed to put a hand out on a near-by wall to stop the world from pitching and tossing him. He almost missed the wall a few times and smacked his face hard against the wall. Banri had left him in the bar hours ago to chase after some skirt, so now he was on his own as he made his way home. His stomach was doing backflips and he stopped a few times to empty the contents in an alleyway.
Gojyo finally made it to the shack where he saw the lights were on. It took him several minutes to work through his agonizing headache that Banri couldn't possibly be home yet. He swore when he realized it was the kid. Kanda was still up. He briefly considered just staying outside, but it was a cool night and Gojyo didn't have anything warm enough to stay out here in. He leaned heavily on the door frame as he fought with the door knob. As the door opened, he spotted Kanda sleeping on the couch. Gojyo knew he was a light sleeper, but maybe if he could just get to his room, the younger boy wouldn't notice just how wrecked he really was right now.
He shut the door as quietly as he could and tried to sneak past. However, he bumped into the table, a chair, and managed to knock over a bottle. So much for being quiet. He took a bad step and the world moved on him. He stumbled as he tried to keep himself upright, but the floor was coming up to greet him. Before he could hit the hard wood, he was caught by a set of smaller arms. Apparently, his noisy entrance had woken Kanda. Hot shame spread through Gojyo as Kanda wordlessly helped him to his room. So much for being a better role model. Maybe the kid was better off without him. Kanda dropped him into bed a little less gently than was expected. "I'm sorry," he whispered as Kanda left. Gojyo never wanted something like this to happen again, ever.
Gojyo came home to find Kanda had once again turned the couch to face the window. He was watching the snow fall, a cup of long-since-cold tea cupped in slack hands and the raggedy grey blanket draped loosely around his shoulders.
"Yo," Gojyo said. Kanda glanced back. His eyes were a million miles away and Gojyo sighed. The swordsman always got like this when left alone if it was snowing. He didn't know why but the snow made the man pensive... for that matter, the cold made him pensive. Maybe it had something to do with having nothing better to do that sit under a blanket and watch the world be washed away by a blanket of monotone white.
Gojyo toed off his boots, leaning down to fix his socks when his boots tried to steal them. He shucked off his coat, hanging it on a hook by the door, before moving to sit by Kanda. Kanda, who was sitting sideways on the couch, pulled his knees up just enough for there to be room for Gojyo. Despite this, Gojyo still ended up sitting on the man's toes.
"Jesus Kanda, you're freezing," Gojyo said, squashing his hip into the armrest so he could grab Kanda's toes with a large warm hand. Despite the thick socks insulating the younger and shorter man’s feet, they were cold to the touch. He slid his hand up from foot to ankle to leg and higher. Despite the warm clothes and the extra insulation of the blanket, Kanda was cold. Gojyo's hand slipped up the man's thigh and over his hip, hooking behind his back and pulling him into his lap.
"Ack!" Kanda said, just barely managing to keep from spilling his tea all over Gojyo and himself. Gojyo took the cold drink and placed it on the table. "What the hell?"
"You're freezing," Gojyo said. "Just enjoy it and warm up, popsicle boy."
"Oi." Kanda frowned.
"You know it's true," Gojyo said with a smirk. Kanda wiggled his cold toes inside their black socks and frowned. With a sigh he curled up on Gojyo’s lap, resting his head on the man's shoulder, his legs hanging over the armrest. Gojyo draped the old blanket over the both of them, moving over so Kanda could tuck his legs closer. It was only a matter of time before Kanda was warm, or warmer at least, and he fell asleep on top of Gojyo. The redhead smiled gently, hugging the man in his arms and on his lap, turning his red gaze to the steadily falling snow. Maybe that was the nature of snow, to make one nostalgic...
It was warm when Kanda woke up which he found odd as he distinctly remembered being cold when he fell asleep the night before. They’d been hiking for a couple days and sleeping rough during the nights between. The entire group had been grateful when they got to the inn they were now at. But that didn't make Kanda any less confused.
A yawn managed to slip out and Kanda decided he didn't care why he was warm. It was comfortable. He curled tighter into the warmth and drifted off once more. It wasn't often that he was this comfortable when he slept.
Gojyo woke when Kanda curled tighter against his side. His red eyes blinked open and he lifted his head to see the younger man curled up against him. Kanda was using his shoulder as a pillow and his long, black hair was splayed all over. He looked shockingly innocent like that. Especially for someone who could out-swear a sailor with ease and never stopped glaring when he thought anyone was watching. A small smile curved Gojyo's lips and he shifted onto his side carefully, pulling Kanda closer. He pulled the too thin blanket up higher and settled back to sleep himself.
That was how Lavi found them an hour later when he went to tell them they'd be leaving soon. Surprised they hadn't woken from his noisy entrance, and not wanting to wake them anyway, Lavi quietly backed out of the room, closing the door gently. He returned to the first floor of the inn where everyone else was waiting.
"Where are Gojyo and Kanda?" Hakkai asked.
"Sleeping," Lavi said, avoiding eye contact.
"Why didn't you wake them up?" Lenalee asked. Lavi glanced at her and looked away awkwardly.
"They were too cute," Lavi muttered.
"Kanda? Cute?" Allen asked. "You must be joking."
"I'm not!" Lavi cried. "They were all cuddled up together. It was cute!"
"I am not cute," came a low and dangerous voice from behind Lavi. The one-eyed redhead turned around slowly to see Kanda standing at the bottom of the stairs.
After being roughly manhandled, processed, and posed for his mug shot, Gojyo was finally dumped into the cell he was currently sitting in. They even took his cigarettes so it sucked far more than it would have without them. Gojyo, probably for the first time in his life, was happy that he was alone because it meant the kid wasn't with him. He actually ran this time. Hopefully, he would go to Banri to tell him that Gojyo had been caught and that he needed to bail him out. Or even the old squid guy, Fu. He might help...maybe. Or at least let the kid stay there until Gojyo could get out. So far he hadn't been given a phone call, but he highly doubted he would get one.
After about an hour, Gojyo had begun to get bored. Just as he had counted every brick on the wall twice, a guard came over and opened the cell door. "A kid just paid your bail," the guard answered when Gojyo gave him a questioning look. Gojyo didn't argue and got out of there as fast as he could. He saw Kanda standing in the lobby and gave him a small wave. Kanda nodded. The police gave him back his personal belongings (his cigarettes and lighter) and the two of them left.
"Thanks kid, I owe you one," He said, clapping a hand on Kanda's shoulder. Kanda winced. It did not go unnoticed. "You hurt?" Gojyo asked, concerned.
"No," Kanda said, as he shook off Gojyo's hand and walked a head.
"Wait," Gojyo said, catching up. "You didn’t get hurt or nothin' when we were chased, right?"
"I'm fine," Kanda said, clearly not wanting to talk about it.
Gojyo stopped. "You didn't fight did you?" Kanda stopped as well. "That's how you paid bail, isn't it?" His voice was full of accusation.
"God damn it, Kanda!" Gojyo yelled, when Kanda didn't answer.
"I got you out didn't I?" Kanda fired back.
"That's not the point," Gojyo snapped. He pulled out a cigarette and lit it, not looking at Kanda. After a few minutes he started walking again.
"Come on kid, let's go get you fixed up then," Gojyo said wearily as he placed a hand firmly, but far more gently, on Kanda's shoulder as they went back to the apartment. Once there, Gojyo went and got the first aid kit. Neither of them spoke as Gojyo tended to any injuries that hadn't healed.
Kanda could tell something was eating at Gojyo but he didn't ask. He didn't get what the big deal was, he had gotten Gojyo out and these injuries would be nothing in no time at all. He hissed as Gojyo wrapped a bandage too tightly and swatted at Gojyo's hands. Gojyo caught Kanda's wrist none too gently and gave him a withering look.
Once Kanda was all patched up, Gojyo grabbed his coat. "I'm going to go for a walk. I'll be back in a bit, Kid."
Kanda was muttering a stream of curses as he ran. He'd promised after all. The next time Gojyo said to run, he'd run. So here he was, running away while Gojyo was getting pinned to the ground by some bastard cops. Cops meant jail which meant bail which you needed money to pay for.
Grabbing a rusting pipe, Kanda used it to sling himself down an alley, never slowing. He gritted his teeth as he ran. He'd promised not to fight again, but where the hell else was he going to earn some quick cash?
Running into the underground arena, Kanda looked for that barely familiar head of red hair. More like orange but whatever. He ran over to the man.
"I'll fight!" Kanda shouted over the hubbub. The man looked over at him and grinned.
"Finally got away from that bitch of a mutt?" Roark sneered. Kanda gritted his teeth but said nothing. Roark shrugged and led him over to one of the guys who ran the arena.
"Yo, Kenji, this brat wants to fight," Roark said. The green haired man looked down at Kanda before shrugging.
"Alright, but we don't have many small guys," Kenji said.
"Gimme the biggest one you got," Kanda snapped. People would bet more on such a stacked fight and he'd stand to earn more. Kenji gave him a calculating look before shrugging again.
Within minutes, Kanda was in the arena facing off against this mountain of a man. His name was Bob or something like that. Kanda ignored it. His name meant nothing, he just had to knock the guy out.
A gun shot rang out and Bob lunged for Kanda. Being smaller and faster, Kanda dodged out of the way. He darted in as Bob stumbled back, aiming a flying side kick towards the man's knee. It wasn't enough to break it, but he did manage to hyper extend it. Bob howled in pain, lashing out. Kanda caught the back hand across the face and went flying, crashing into the cement wall of the arena. He hauled himself to his feet, wiping the blood from the corner of his mouth and smirking.
Bob looked wary and the people in the crowd were cheering. Bob made to punch him again but Kanda grabbed the arm, swinging himself up to catch the man's thick neck with his legs. He wrapped his legs around Bob's neck in a triangle choke, letting himself hang down the man's back like a deadly necklace. He grabbed the man's belt, using it for leverage to make the choke tighter.
Seconds later Bob toppled over backwards, unconscious. Everyone went silent as Kanda's legs unwound from Bob's neck. Was he unconscious too? That question was answered when Kanda wormed his way out from under the giant man, spitting on his purple face before turning to face his sponsor and giving him a bloody grin.
Roark smirked back at him as he collected his winnings. Two burly men walked into the arena, removing Bob while another guy was directed in. Kanda frowned. Sure he was already healed, but wasn't one guy enough?
Despite this, Kanda got ready. This guy was smaller. Normal sized. Honestly, he kind of reminded Kanda of Banri. His blood boiled. That blond bastard was the reason they were in this mess.
A powerful round kick to the ribs snapped Kanda from his thoughts and smashed him against the wall once more.
Growling, Kanda got up. They circled each other for a moment before the Banri lookalike darted in again, this time with a punch. Kanda ducked under it, aiming a shot at the man's kidney. It connected and the guy winced, spinning to face him. They circled again but the guy still made the mistake of striking first. He tried to kick Kanda in the head but Kanda just ducked, taking a cheap shot and elbowing the guy in the crotch as he spun out from under the kick.
The guy fell to the ground, groaning in pain. Kanda scoffed, delivering a hard kick to his temple that knocked him out cold. These guys were weak.
Despite this, Kanda was panting, try to hide it as he might.
Kanda growled under his breath as yet another guy was ushered into the arena. How many more was he going to have to fight?
This guy was smaller. He reminded Kanda of Gojyo almost, except the lack of scars, red hair, or red eyes. And just about everything else. Kanda wondered how he'd even made the connection because Gojyo wasn't a bad looking guy and this one was hideous.
Shaking his head, Kanda readied himself for the fight. The guy was shaking in his worn boots and Kanda rolled his eyes.
Despite that the guy looked horrified, when he started fighting, he was a force to be reckoned with. It was all Kanda could to to keep dodging. A fist connected with his temple and he went down. He pushed himself up shakily, the world blurry. Panting, he tried to keep his game up. It wasn't working.
A kick connected with his ribs and he heard more than felt them break. Gasping for breath and wiping blood from the corner of his mouth, Kanda lay on the ground. The guy started kicking the shit out of him and Kanda growled, waiting for the man to pause for a breath. The second he did Kanda pushed himself up into a tornado kick, knocking the guy to the ground. He was on him like white on rice the second he hit the ground, arms tangled around his neck and cutting off his air as well as the blood going to his brain.
The guy was out in seconds and Kanda let him go, staggering to the edge of the arena. He stumbled out when the burly dudes came to collect his opponent.
"That should do for tonight then," Roark said with a sneer. Kanda glared at him, still panting and the first flares of pain made themselves known.
"I need the money," Kanda snapped.
"Yeesh, pushy little brat aren't you," Roark said, handing over a wad of cash. "What a brat like you needs money so badly for is beyond me. And if I find that you're using it to feed your sweet tooth, I’ll put you back in that arena and won't let you out till you're dead."
"Bite me," Kanda snarled, spitting blood at the man's boots before running out of the underground. He had the cash, now he just had to get Gojyo out and they could forget this ever happened.
Gojyo laughed as he pulled a dented camera from the bottom of his bag, “Looks like there’s still film in it too. Huh, nice!”
“OH! I wanna take a picture!”
“Nah-uh Monkey, you’re little chimp brain couldn’t possibly figure out how to use it.”
“I’m not a monkey! And I definitely use it! All you do is press the button!” If these two were starting this now, it was going to prove a long day on the train. Hakkai would see Sanzo’s rage already rising and deemed an early intervention would save every passenger’s nerves from the shouting and gunshots that would inevitably follow.
“Gojyo, why don’t you let him take a few pictures, yes?” Hakkai suggested.
“Okay, yeah. Whatever chimp just makes sure you have it pointed in the right direction,” Gojyo conceded, handing the
“I’m not an idiot!” And with that he was off running about the car. Every cabin in their car was invaded and with a quick “CanItakeyourpictureokaythanks!” Goku would snap a photo and leave. Because the Sanzo Ikkou picked up a few extra members, they all ate together, partly as a get to know your traveling companions, and as a way to plan where the hell they were going. Goku still had the camera and proceeded, once he had sufficiently cleared a healthy portion of the table with Allen, to take group self-shots. Lavi took the camera from him at some point and starting snapping some pictures of his own. Eventually the camera got around to everyone. Just as Goku was going to snap the last picture on the roll of film, Gojyo plucked it from his hands and snapped a photo of him and Kanda who up until now had managed to avoid every other picture. The now full camera went back in the bag and would sit there, forgotten and undeveloped until long after everyone returned home.
Kanda hurried into the house, door slamming behind him accidentally in his rush to keep the sudden downpour out. With an exasperated groan, he slumped against the battered, old wood lifting his left foot to carefully test the ankle. Despite having rolled it quite severely, it was fine and Kanda heaved a sigh before pushing off the door. He was soaked and doubted that Gojyo wanted him dripping all over the place.
That being said, Kanda quickly strode through the house to the bathroom, ignoring that the shower was on as he flung the door open. He’d done so, so many times in the past, Gojyo had stopped freaking out at him. Still, that didn’t stop the elder male from peeking out from behind the shower curtain.
“What’s up?” Gojyo asked as Kanda closed the bathroom door to get at the closet door behind it.
“Started raining,” Kanda grumbled, grabbing a towel off the top of the small pile. He rubbed the towel over his hair viciously, ignoring how it messed his ponytail up further than his training had before. Gojyo made a contemplative noise before retreating back into his shower.
“Leave a towel on the counter for me?” he requested. Kanda grunted an affirmation, grabbing a towel and setting it on the counter by the sink. He was about to close the door and strip out of his soaked clothes when he noticed a shadow down by the floor.
Frowning to himself, Kanda got down on his knees and looked under the bottom shelf, moving aside the bottles of cleaning products that weren’t used nearly often enough absently. The shadow he’d noticed was a small door, barely a foot square, set into the wall. Kanda frowned and sat back on his heels glancing over toward the other side of the wall the door was set into. There was nothing but air; thought that wasn’t what had bugged most about the small door. He’d never noticed a door there before.
“Hey, Gojyo, has there always been a door here?” Kanda asked. He looked over his shoulder to find Gojyo wasn’t in the shower. In fact the shower wasn’t even running. The only sounds in the small bathroom were those of his own breathing and the rain pounding ever harder on the roof. Kanda shook his head. He must be more tired than he’d thought from training.
Pushing the thoughts aside, Kanda leaned down to get a better look at the door. It was pretty normal looking, besides being square and small. The knob was fittingly tiny as well, tarnished brass shining dully from its place against aged, silver wood. Curious, Kanda reached out and twisted the knob carefully. It turned easily and the small door creaked open quietly.
Beyond the door sat a skull in a pool of blood despite that there shouldn’t have been enough room for such a space in the wall. Somehow, there was light in that space, like the space was outside somewhere. Kanda shook those thoughts away and examined the skull. Three lotus flowers bloomed from it. One in each eye and one in the mouth. Attached to the skull somehow where stringy, lank strands of blood-red hair. They were familiar, but he couldn’t place them.
The lights went out, and the rain stopped. All Kanda could see was the flower infested skull, illuminated only by the softly glowing flowers. The skull started chattering, jaw working and mangling the lotus in its mouth even as the petals fell away and turned to ash.
“Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us.”
Kanda felt tremors shake his own body and his mind felt strangely blank. His heart started racing and Kanda’s hands shook, fingers twitching sporadically as he reached for the skull.
“Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us.”
Kanda felt like he was gagging on something and a pressure was growing in his skull. His blank mind swirled sickeningly and he found he couldn’t close his eyes even though he wanted to.
“Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us.”
He shook his head against the chanting. It remained the same volume, the same pace, but it felt insistent and he couldn’t find a reason to disobey. Still, he shied from the chanting. It was horrifying in its consistency in a way that mounting volume or increased speed could not be.
“Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us.”
Kanda felt his world shift and suddenly he was looking out from the petal wrapped eyes of the skull in his hands. He still didn’t know why it was familiar but those clinging thoughts were shoved away by the sight of himself. His hair was falling out in clumps, and the dampness he was kneeling in wasn’t from the rain soaked into his clothes but the blood pooled on the floor. Kanda noted absently that it was his own blood, his body a wrinkled husk of what it had been, blood dripping slowly from his eyes even as it poured still from his forearms.
“Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us.”
Kanda felt himself tumble from his own fingers, the skull he now resided in watching from tilted perspective now. Blood obscured the vision of his right eye entirely, but he could still see in vivid detail how his skin was drying and crumbling to dust, his muscles following quickly after.
“Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us. Join us.”
Kanda watched as lotuses burst forth from his mouth and eye sockets, spraying the room with what blood remained.
Kanda woke with a start and immediately scrambled out of bed to go relive his dinner into the toilet. Five minutes later when he finally stopped heaving, Kanda slumped, leaning his sweaty forehead against the seat of the toilet.
“You okay?” a familiar voice asked from the doorway. Kanda turned his head, opening his eyes even though he didn’t remember closing them. He saw a red haired man standing in the doorway and it took a moment for his mind to catch up, putting a name to that familiar face.
“Gojyo,” Kanda muttered, before closing his eyes. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
“You don’t look fine,” Gojyo said. Kanda scoffed and sat up, reaching out to flush the evidence of how ‘not fine’ he really was. He placed both hand on the seat of the toilet and pushed himself to his feet, legs shaking.
“It was just a nightmare, I’m fine,” Kanda said, shaking his head. He stumbled to the sink and went through the motions of brushing his teeth, but his mind wasn’t there.
“Kanda, oi!”
Kanda jumped and looked over at Gojyo.
“You do realize that you’ve been brushing your teeth for, like, twenty minutes now, right?” Gojyo said. Kanda blinked before shaking his head jerkily and rinsing his mouth out. He dropped his toothbrush back into the cup he stored it in and pushed away from the sink. Despite the time, his legs still shook as he walked back to the bedroom he now shared with Gojyo, said redhead trailing worriedly behind him.
“There isn’t a little door in the bathroom closet, is there?” Kanda asked as they crawled back into the bed. When he received no answer, he turned around to see Gojyo laying behind him in all of his bloody, stringy haired, skeletal, flower infested glory.
He woke up screaming and never made it to the bathroom.
I was running away from bad guys again. It seemed to be a theme of my life. Beside me is Gojyo. My friend. My brother, almost. Banri had vanished, as per usual. When the going got tough, Banri hid like the vermin that he was. Oh how I would pound him some day. But not today. No, today I would run. And tomorrow?
Tomorrow it would rain. It would be bright and sunny but it would rain. There would be no rainbow, no beauty. There would be loneliness and an ache that would not fade the whole day. I would not be able to look at Gojyo for the blood red shade of his hair and eyes would remind me of the blood that coated the room I killed my best friend in. Tomorrow it would be two years since Alma died on the blade currently strapped diagonally across my back. Tomorrow I would mourn, like I should.
Tomorrow it would rain. But today, today we would run.
Kanda started awake from a particularly bad nightmare. He dragged in ragged breaths trying to calm himself. The small room suddenly felt oppressive and he had to get out.
He grabbed his sword and was about to open the door when he heard the front door open and the sound of angry voices enter the small shack. He gripped the sword and opened the door enough to see what was happening
"No Banri, I think you’re an asshole! You always leave me to deal with the shit you get into," he heard Gojyo yell.
He heard Banri mutter something that clearly must have upset the redhead because he socked Banri one right in the face. Banri stumbled back then leapt at Gojyo and the started an all-out brawl in the house. Some of the bottles that littered the house were knocked off tables and smashed on the floor. Besides fists flying, curses and insults flew too.
Finally Banri threw a punch that sent Gojyo to the floor. He shook himself then walked out the front door, slamming it so hard the window rattled. Gojyo spit out some blood and got himself up as Kanda opened the door fully. Gojyo turned sharply at the noise and stared at the boy. Kanda stepped out of his room, but stepped right onto a piece of shattered bottle, the shard imbedded itself into the bottom of his foot.
"Ah!" Kanda yelped as he grabbed his foot and sat. Gojyo was shaken from his initial shock of finding out Kanda witnessed the fight and shakily made his way over to the injured boy. Despite feeling like he got hit by a bus, Gojyo scooped up the boy and brought him to a chair. He found his makeshift first aid kit, because damn if one of them was always getting roughed around, and set to removing the glass form Kanda's foot. Once removed, he gave the boy one of his lopsided grins, enhanced how with a bloody lip and forming bruises.
He went to the box for some gauze when Kanda spoke. "It will heal."
"Yeah, it will but you need to wrap it," Gojyo replied.
"No, it will heal, see?" Even as he said it, the wound began to close.
[8/19/2012 1:28:09 AM] Kyah: "Well I'll be damned," Gojyo said amazed. "I could use that right about now as he looked down at his cut up knuckles. He looked around at the mess and decided it could wait for tomorrow. He cleaned himself up and then asked, "What are you doing up anyway?"
"I couldn't sleep," Kanda mumbled.
Gojyo frowned briefly, "S'okay kiddo, as he stood and ruffled Kanda's hair.
"Don't call me that!" Kanda snapped.
"Okay," Gojyo said as he held his hands up to show he meant no harm. He knew when he was younger and couldn't sleep, he would often crawl into bed with Jien. "You can sleep with me, if you like," Gojyo offered. Kanda seriously considered turning him down but then thought back to his dream and nodded. They carefully picked their way through the broken bottles. Once on the small bed, Kanda curled up into a ball away from the other boy and fell asleep. Gojyo sighed. Maybe Banri wouldn't come back this time. For the first time, he found that he really hoped he wouldn't.
I woke with a start, lying in bed for a moment wondering what exactly it was that woke me. A bright flash from the window drew my gaze outside. A deep rumble of thunder had me sitting up fast. I jumped out of bed and practically ran to the window, staring up at the pitch black sky. It was dark, so very dark, and I couldn't see a thing but for when the lightning flashed.
A light rain started and, disregarding all common sense or decency, I ran outside. Oh, this most certainly wasn't my first thunderstorm. But ever since that first one, I had loved them. They were awe inspiring with their tall clouds, bright lightning, and loud thunder. A wonder of nature, strong enough to destroy the world that created them.
I felt the warm rain on my skin and the cool breeze ran its damp fingers through my growing hair. The door opened behind me from where it had slammed back shut and I turned. A flash of lightning revealed that it was Gojyo standing in the door. I just grinned and he smirked, shaking his head.
Aki was six now. Time to enter the first grade. Gojyo and Kanda both agreed that Aki should get an education and Hakkai had helped him prepare for the first grade. Thankfully they lived in a mostly human town where not many understood what red hair and red eyes meant, but that did not help any of Gojyo's fears as he walked Aki to school.
He could still distinctly remember how cruel kids could be and how it had motivated him to stop his education all together at a young age.
Over the past few weeks Gojyo had done his best to warn Aki about the possibility of him being picked on without discouraging him. Aki was, in fact, totally pumped about going to school. Even as they walked now, the youth was chattering on and on about things he was going to do, hoped to learn, and friends he hoped to make.
Man there was nothing that would bring this kid down. Gojyo sincerely hoped that nothing would either.
After a sort of drawn out goodbye, which mostly consisted of Gojyo making Aki run through ways he could contact him or Kanda and any other sort of parental advice that he could think of, Aki ran off to his first day of school.
Gojyo didn't have a shift today and Kanda was home so both of them were home all day, waiting and worrying (although neither would admit it). Both of them went to pick up Aki, as neither could just sit and wait anymore. The kids were released from their classrooms and the two of them finally spotted the familiar bob of crazy red hair bouncing towards them. Aki came up and hugged them both.
Kanda asked the question that the two of them had been agonizing over all day. "So, how was your day?"
They didn't have to wait long as Aki's face lit up. "It was great!" and he proceeded to tell them everything he learned and friends he made the entire way home.
I froze when Gojyo fell back onto Mugen. The white-silver of the blade protruded from his abdomen gruesomely. He’d fallen fast enough that there was no blood staining that part of the blade. The rain became the only thing I could here and it was deafening. Gojyo got back to his feet, wrenching the blade from his chest. Blood soaked the once silver blade and a chocked scream slipped past shock pale lips. Mugen remained in my frozen fingers. I couldn't let it go. The blood on the blade dripped down, made thinner by the rain. It slipped through the holes in the tsuba and coated my slender fingers. It was lukewarm and I cringed away, my hands tightening further on the hilt of the sword.
Gojyo lashed out, punching the last guy hard across the face and knocking him out. His hands pressed against the wound on his front, hot blood that matched his hair and eyes in color perfectly slipped through his long, bony fingers.
Gojyo fell to his knees and my grip finally fell slack on Mugen's hilt. My precious sword, and only possession, fell to the ground. Gojyo's dulling, blood red eyes met my obsidian gaze. I could practically see his consciousness draining away.
Blood red eyes drifted shut and Gojyo slumped to the side. I jumped forward, crashing to my knees and catching Gojyo. I felt the rough ground shred the skin of my knees but I couldn't comprehend the pain. "Gojyo," I said, shaking the older boy slightly. "Gojyo, wake up. You have to wake up."
Gojyo only let out a quiet groan. I swore colorfully and tried to think of something I could do. Anything. The blind Exorcist flashed before my mind's eye and I blinked. I let Gojyo slump against me so he was lying across my lap as I knelt in the bloody mud. My already bloody fingers scrabbled behind me before finding purchase on Mugen’s blade. I grabbed it tight, not caring that it cut into my fingers and straight to the bone. I needed more blood. I had to make sure this worked. I wanted this to work. Really I was praying it would. I dragged Mugen’s deadly sharp blade across both of my wrists, taking care to cut the veins open.
"Please let this work," I prayed to the god I did not believe in. I managed to drip some blood on the wound, closing it, but my own wounds healed too fast. I tossed Mugen's ungainly length away and grabbed a piece of broken glass. I ignored the pain, the fear, and forced myself to focus. Next time this wouldn’t happen. Next time I would run when I was told to. Because I wanted there to be a next time. I wanted Gojyo to be there to tell me to run. I wanted to do another job with him. It was fun. I gritted my teeth and carved the jagged, sharp edge of the glass down the inside of my arms from elbow to wrist and pushed Gojyo onto his back to heel the wound there too. When he still didn't wake, I was afraid.
"Gojyo..." I said. "Gojyo. I'll run next time, I promise, just wake up." it was useless. The injury on the inside was still there. I ripped my left wrist open anew and pressed the wound against Gojyo's barely parted lips.
Gojyo coughed slightly, his eyebrows coming together in distaste. I knew it had to be from the taste of my blood on his tongue. "Gojyo?"
"Hmm," Gojyo said. "Can't be dead, you're still here, shrimp."
"Gojyo," I said, relieved.
"Let's go back, yeah," Gojyo said, trying to sit up. Try as he might, he was just too tired. I nodded enthusiastically, picking up Mugen and sheathing it.
When Gojyo couldn't stand, I picked him up, piggy-back style. He protested, flailing tiredly. Despite his larger size, I carried him easily. He was light compared to Marie. Hopefully Banri would be gone for a few days and Gojyo wouldn't ask too many questions about the missing wounds. Feeding him my blood had healed the others as well. Maybe I could play it off as a delusion and just pretend I had no idea what he was talking about.
From the moment I got outta bed this mornin' I could tell this wan't gunna be my day. That little naggin' voice in the back of my head sayin' I shoulda stayed in bed kept buggin' me through the day.
But I got up anyways. Banri had a job and he needed us to do it. I didn't like takin' the little squirt with us when we had to do this kinda shit. He was jus' a kid, but he was smaller than us and Banri saw that as an advantage. Anyway, we had'ta take the job as rent was comin' up on this shitty piece'a real-estate. We left the house, the kid carryin' his sword that was too big for him, I could just feel somethin' was off about the day. I shook it off, though I wonder if I had listened to it that I wouldn't be where I was now.
But I'm not there yet. The job went well enough. We got item we were sent in for and got out fine. However, one of us must've tripped an alarm or somethin' because before we got no more than two streets down we were bein' chased by the pissed, armed men of the guy we just stole from.
Somewhere along the way Banri ditched us, taking the item with him. Bastard. So we ended up cornered in a dead end ally, just the kid and I. I told him to stay back as I started to take out the morons. I started swingin', hopin' that I could keep 'em busy so the kid could escape. This is why I hated draggin' him on these jobs. They always ended in a fight and I would hate to see him get hurt. Me? I could take it, what's a couple of bruises anyway?
It starts to rain as I take out a couple of guys, but my game wasn't that good today. I just felt off. That little voice came up again, tellin' me I should've stayed in bed. The kid never runs when I tell him too. Stubborn little brat. He just draws his too big sword and starts fightin' with me. I can respect that, but still, he's just a kid, he shouldn't have to do any of this. The rain was makin' the ally all wet and slick. Great. Just what we needed. So it was no surprise when I got hit that my feet slipped from under me.
What was a surprise, however, was the silver tip stickin' outta my side. It didn't really hurt. Not yet. I guess I didn't see the kid behind me when I slipped. Maybe I should've stayed in bed. I managed to get my feet under me again. Stepping forward, pain shot through me as the sword withdrew from me. I tried to choke off the scream that attempted to tear itself from my throat. I hit the guy as hard as I could, knocking him out. Thankfully, he was the last one. Hot blood, the color of my hair, slipped from between my fingers as I dropped hard onto my knees. The last thing I saw before I passed out was the look of horror on the kid's face.
Gojyo had known Kanda for – what was it now? – a month. He’d learned a lot in that short amount of time surprisingly. They boy didn’t like being called by his first name and would react with violence if it was used. He could swear more fluently than Gojyo could, which was a feat in and of itself. His sword was named Mugen. He did not trust anyone, ever. He couldn’t sleep without his sword. His bracelet was charmed to keep his hallucinations at bay.
And if there was one thing that Gojyo had learned above all else, it was that Kanda Yuu did not laugh. He did not understand jokes or their point. He did not find anything funny or amusing. He was never truly happy either. Oh, he’d seen the boy smirk like the devil himself but he was never happy.
That was probably why the light childish laughter from the back of the house brought him running to the back door. He paused just before throwing the door open when he saw Kanda standing under a tree. There was a bright green something crawling up Kanda’s arm and the boy laughed, catching it with his hand and letting it go again.
Gojyo realized a moment later that it was a stick bug. Kanda watched the creature’s halting and spindly legged walk with glittering obsidian eyes, laughing when the little feet tickled him. Gojyo smirked; leaning against the doorjamb and watching the boy play with the insect. Sure it wasn’t the most normal thing to play with, but it wasn’t like he was ripping its legs off so Gojyo supposed it was fine.
Kanda was running. He wasn't consciously sure why. Fear and panic swirled through his veins like liquid nitrogen as his heart pounded a tattoo against his ribs. He passed figures, human in form but demonically evil in expression with little other features visible.
Warm wetness fell from the sky and formed puddles on the bone strewn ground. Kanda knew better than to believe that it was rain. Rain was not red after all.
The bones gave way to skeletons as he ran, his feet catching on rib cages and femurs as he ran. Skeletons gave way to mutilated corpses. Kanda cringed each time his feet passed through decimated flesh. Corpses gave way to dead bodies and those gave away to dead comrades. Dead comrades he knew were alive. Nonetheless, he saw them lying dead in the bloody mud. He tried to run on but their fingers clung to his ankles, catching on his trousers and the edges of his long coat.
Kanda tripped, something he hadn't done in so many years. He went sprawling and ended up over the corpse of Gojyo. Kanda froze. His fingers clenched in the bloody mud on either side of Gojyo’s head, his whole body going tense. He did not want to straddle this corpse above all the others. This one he did not want to see, ever.
The corpse of Gojyo slowly started to move, eyelids cracking open and limbs moving much like those of a marionette in the hands on an inexperienced puppeteer. The arms came up, wrapping around his shoulders. Kanda stared into Gojyo's dead gaze. One eye lolled down and to the left while the right eye stared straight at him despite the white film that was forming on it in death.
"Why did you live?" Gojyo accused with blue lips that had half rotted away to reveal jaw bones and teeth. Some strings of fraying muscle still clung to the bones. Just enough to make the picture even more gruesome. "You said that we'd die together. You lied to me."
Arms slid and suddenly half skeletal fingers closed around Kanda's throat. "Gojyo," Kanda rasped past the thumbs intent on crushing his trachea. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry."
"SORRY ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH!" came the roar of all of the corpses, comrade or no. Hands gripped him, holding him as more and more of the dead piled on top of him, smothering him. "YOU LET US DIE! WE'RE DEAD BECAUSE OF YOU! BECAUSE YOU WERE TOO WEAK TO SAVE US!"
"I'm sorry," Kanda said again, only managing to mouth the words due to the lack of air. The bodies piled higher and Kanda could no longer hold them up. He fell to his elbows, face mere centimeters from Gojyo's. Despite this he felt no breath against his lips and a silent, yet broken sob passed his bluing lips. Warm blue met cold, half there blue as the world finally faded to black.
Kanda woke with a start, sitting up in bed like he'd been shocked. He kicked all the covers off of himself, ignorant of everything else and scrambled back into the headboard. His back smashed against the wooden rails and he curled into himself. He wrapped his arms around himself, hugging himself tightly and pulling his knees up to his chest to squash his arms as well. Then and only then did he look around the room.
There was a knock at the door and Kanda tensed, obsidian gaze snapping to the plain wood. "Kanda? What's going on?" Gojyo asked from the other side of the door.
Kanda clapped a hand over his mouth to stifle a relieved sob, dropping his head onto his knees. He took a deep breath to try to calm himself and said," Nothing, just go back to bed." It came out far more shakily than he would have liked and he cursed under his breath when he didn't hear Gojyo move away.
"Are you okay?" Gojyo asked. It sounded like he had his forehead pressed against the door.
"Fine," Kanda managed to say. It was strained and just barely above a whisper as he fought back tears. He hated crying. It was useless. And besides, it was just a dream and Gojyo was right there. He was alive, naught ten feet from him. Alive and breathing and warm.
Kanda heard Gojyo sigh. "I'm coming in," the taller man said. Kanda's head shot up, eyes wide. Before he could protest Gojyo was opening the door. Gojyo's bright, blood-red eyes widened slightly at the sight of Kanda.
Kanda, the perpetually annoying, stuck up, swordsman who acted like nothing in the world could faze him of bring him to his knees was curled into the smallest ball he possibly could against the headboard with wide, tear-filled, horrified eyes. Gojyo blinked in shock. "Kanda?"
"I'm fine," Kanda whispered, breaking eye contact and hiding his face in a cascade of tangled black hair as he rested his forehead against his knees.
Gojyo crossed the space between them in three long strides, grabbing Kanda's arm. Kanda's head shot up and he jerked away, whimpering like an injured animal and trying to push himself back further into the headboard. When that didn't work he just pulled his knees closer.
"Shh, hey, sorry," Gojyo said, sitting sideways on the edge of the bed before Kanda. He reached out carefully, running the palm of his hand up and down the area he'd grabbed. Kanda closed his eyes, the welling tears rolling down unnaturally pale cheeks. Despite this, he leaned into the touch. "Bad dream?"
Kanda made a noise that was half laugh half choked sob, a wry smirk curving pale lips. He opened his eyes, a desperate frown creasing his eyebrows. "Yeah, bad dream."
"Want to talk about it?" Gojyo asked, scooting a little closer. Kanda gave him a look that suggested insanity and Gojyo raised his hand in surrender. "Some people think it helps."
Gojyo got up to leave. Kanda let out a panicked noise and lunged forward, latching onto the only thing he could grab, which happened to be the waist band of Gojyo's boxers. When Gojyo glanced back, Kanda snatched his hand back as if burned. "Don't leave," Kanda whispered, refusing to meet Gojyo’s gaze.
"Kanda?" Gojyo said, half turning back.
"Please," Kanda said, managing to force himself to meet Gojyo's blood-red gaze.
Gojyo frowned but turned back fully. He crawled onto the bed and placed himself on the far side, fetching and fixing the covers that had been thrown willy nilly in Kanda's panic. He settled down and Kanda hesitantly slipped back under the covers. He curled himself into Gojyo's side, clinging to him for all intents and purposes. Gojyo shifted a bit, uncomfortable with the sudden clinginess from a man who would rather live on the moon than interact with people. "Thank you," Kanda whispered as he drifted off once more. Gojyo sighed and stroked his messy hair before allowing himself to sleep again.
Rated: T (I don’t know... maybe this should be M but it’s kind of really mild)
Links: FF.net / AO3
Kanda, for as long as Gojyo had known him, had worn regular slacks with his uniform. Well, maybe not regular. They were a little thicker than normal to withstand more but they always ended up cut up. So when Kanda showed up in his actual uniform pants, Gojyo choked on his beer. "Are those leather?" Gojyo asked, tugging at his own pant leg so Kanda knew what he was referring to.
Kanda glanced down and sighed. "Yeah." he said.
Gojyo almost jumped on the younger man right then and there. The leather was tight, form-fitting, and looked like it would be soft. The black material was snug and hugged Kanda's not inconsiderable ass beautifully. "God..." Gojyo muttered.
"We're still going, right?" Kanda said. "If not I will kill you."
"Why wouldn't we be going?" Gojyo asked.
"You seem dazed," Kanda said. Gojyo smirked and shook his head.
"We're still going," Gojyo said. "You don't get out of it that easily."
"Humph," Kanda said, looking away haughtily and crossing his arms over his chest. His usual white, button down had been replaced by a tight, also black training shirt with a slightly high collar and no sleeves.
Gojyo paid to get in and had to practically drag Kanda into the club. The samurai glared at him the whole time until Gojyo pulled him over to the bar. They both got and drank beers quickly. After about two and a half beers Gojyo put a hand on Kanda's shoulder and leaned in to speak into his ear. "Wanna dance?"
Kanda tried not to shiver when Gojyo's hot breath hit his ear and turned to look at the dance floor. The music thrumming through the speakers was loud and almost sexual. Kanda flushed and ducked his head, shrugging his shoulders.
"Come on, it'll be fun," Gojyo said, pulling Kanda up as he slid from his own bar stool. Kanda tried to ignore the fact that Gojyo had grabbed his hand and followed the redhead.
Gojyo stopped once they were a couple people deep in the crowd of people on the dance floor. "Just let go," he said into Kanda's ear before he started dancing. He had to show Kanda how to move for a couple moments but by the time the next song started, Kanda was dancing on his own.
Somehow during the confusion of dancing amongst so many people, the pair found themselves on the edge of the group. Kanda was facing the group but Gojyo wasn't and as such Gojyo noticed that the wall before him was made up of mirrored glass. "Ne, Kanda," Gojyo purred, spinning Kanda around so he too faced the giant mirror. "Look at how hot you look right now."
Kanda blushed as Gojyo grabbed his hips. They both continued dancing even while red and black eyes scanned their reflections. Kanda looked a mess. His tight shirt was riding up just a little, revealing a sliver of pale skin and his hair was coming loose of its ponytail. His cheeks were red and what hair had come free clung to his damp forehead and neck.
Gojyo's long fingers massaged Kanda's hips as they danced and Kanda bit his lip, eyes half closing. Gojyo chuckled. "Why don't we take this somewhere... more private," Gojyo purred. Kanda shivered and spun in his grasp, lean arms wrapping around his neck as calloused fingers buried themselves in blood red hair. Kanda smashed their lips together, eyes slipping closed, and uncaring of anyone who might be watching. Gojyo smirked into the kiss and pushed Kanda back against the mirror. Maybe taking the uptight bastard clubbing wasn't such a bad idea after all.
