(If you find an au I’ve posted that you fuck with lemme know and I’ll name it and put the tag here)
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Laundry and Other Domestic Skills Au : Fem! Naruto realizes Sasuke got dropped into the deep end of being an orphan after the massacre and offers to teach him how to take care of household chores. One thing leads to another and suddenly they’re married and living together before they can even graduate the academy.
Eyes are Better than wedding rings au: Obito might have died at kannabi bridge, but his crush sure as hell didn’t. How else is a spirit supposed to react when Kakashi is saying all those earnest things at the memorial stone?!? It does NOT help that the other spirits keep congratulating him for having such a devoted man that visits him frequently (unlike theirs usually went unsaid).
Wait whos Obito au: Obito wakes up with amnesia, gets into far too many S rank fights, and joins team seven in Wave. If this is a dream, Kakashi never wants to wake up.
From pup to bitch au: When thrown into the past, Naruto has two major goals. 1) save everyone he can. 2) get railed by Kakashi sensei asap. Sakura and Sasuke are exhausted bystanders.
Itanaru coparents au: when mikoto dies giving birth to sasuke, Fugaku distances himself from his remaining family. Itachi is forced to step up but aged up!Naruto refuses to let him do it alone.
The Fox and the Wolf AU: Naruto forgoes the typical bounty hunter arc when he gets sent to the past and decides to infiltrate and expose Root instead. With his alibi as Akane Uzumaki, konohas resident infiltration specialist and test tube baby, secured he’s making the most of the situation. Too bad his old crush on Kakashi reawakens like a sleeper agent when the hokage starts putting them on missions together.
The kit and the pup au: when a young kakashi has an amnesic Akane fall on top of him, he decides to bring the strange boy home with him. Sakumo tries to raise them as brothers, but honestly? He shouldn’t have killed himself if he wanted them to stay that way. Now look at them. They have separation anxiety!
The kit and the pup: survival edition: an amnesic Akane finds himself waking up in the past freshly pint sized and causes problems for everyone. With root exposed and Orochimaru dead, Kakashi and Akane are shoved to the frontlines. They get cannibalistic about it.
ANBU sub culture au: Naruto likes taking care of his shinobi. Sometimes he needs to get a bit up close and personal to do it.
Poly team seven: sometimes family is a sensei and three fuck off strong students who want to tap that SO bad.
Masked up au: when a teenage Kakashi wakes up in the future, ANBU Fox is tasked with watching him. Kakashi finds himself head over heels in love with man his future self marries and the thought of his future with Fox drives him forward. But as time passes, he starts to think he went to a different universe and falls for Naruto instead. Of course that’s when Fox pops up in ANBU.
Madatobi headcannon that when Tobirama is angry and in a bad snit he will invent most terrifying torture-esque jutsu ever not known until then to man. And when he's feeling all bubbly and warm and well rested and bathed and fucked and then has slept deeply he comes up with healing jutsu and progressive helpful inventions. He has twice the energy and patience and benevolence. Hidden under his usual mask of well placed shinobi indifference.
It takes a while but Madara starts to notice the pattern. And then he slowly begins to realize that his personal affairs might just be dictating the course of history, inventions and progression of the village. In short, his dick game saves (or dooms) lives.
WAIT, Headcannon for Kiba and Hinata being in a cuckold dynamic but they're just friends, trust™
Hinata is a secret pervert and Kiba found out about it and asked if she wanted to do it. Faints. Shrugs, next time during a mission, they need a plan to isolate the target and make them weak enough to capture alive. Idea juggling abound aaaand—Kiba hooks up with the target as the plan.
Hinata and Shino are preparing the capture room. Kiba and their target arrive early, scramble to hide. Shino is gone. How the fuck... Hinata scrambling to hide, dives in the closet. Kiba and their subject enter the room, tipsy and horny.
She's subjected to a sight that Hinata has always heard about, but never considered... watching before. She actives he Byakugan to make sure Kiba doesn't get stabbed in the middle of...rip, tear. He's shoving his hands in their pants. Being so mean and harsh. The wanted subject seems to be crazy for this. Asking for more, more. Why do they want to be bullied like...
Hinata forgets her surroundings. Kiba going wild. Fucking this person like no one's watching. Talking dirty in their ear, asking if they wanna be his sex pet. He forgets the original mission and he fucks them til sunrise. Shino has to remind Kiba through his bugs LITERALLY spelling it out on the wall for Fido to remember. Oops. Then wait, where's Hinata. Opens the closet, sleeping soundly. Nose bleed. Double oops!!!
Cut to Kiba begging for Hinata to forgive him and NOT tell Neji about his fuck up. Her cousin has been so scary ever since they've patched things up together. And Hinata does forgive him...on ONE condition...
“ do... ⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄-⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ do it again... ”
[ and then she gets teased for wanting Kiba to fuck Naruto. ]
Asexual queen Hinata who gets basically a front row seat to some hot and steamy gay sex, with her bestie Kiba at the reins no less, she was gonna be hooked from the start. Discovers a lot about herself that night. Her then asking Kiba about all his gay little trysts and he’s teasing her cuz “oh you little pervert, you liked it that much huh?” He then decides now’s a good a time as ever to inform her that he’s fucked Naruto. Like multiple times. He’s never old her cuz he didn’t wanna crush her crush like that but he sees the sparkle in her eyes grow even shinier and he think “jackpot.” She absolutely asks if she can watch them do it next time
hold on HOLD ON cause that just made me think of itachi heating up his mouth with the beginning of a doton jutsu or maybe a new doton jutsu he invented and using it on sasuke in the wintertime so that everywhere he puts his mouth is WARM warm compared to the rest of sasukes body
like hickies, nipples, oral, can you imagine?? sasuke would go crazy
The concept of Tobirama deciding HE wants an Uzumaki wife, traveling to Uzu, and then getting himself zapped by a time travel seal amuses me almost as much as the concept of Naruto x Tobirama in the canon series timeline does. The beef between Tobirama and Sasuke would be unreal, and the comedic potential? Like oh, you ran off to kill your brother and get cozy with Orochimaru? Well I'M dating the second Hokage! So take that!
Tobirama is probably mean as hell too. Literally nobody can tolerate him for more than five minutes. Or so Tobirama thought— enter Naruto, who literally just lets it roll off his back. He has a grumpy tailed beast in his stomach and is on a team with not only Kakashi Hatake, but Sasuke Uchiha. Heee can see under all that.
fem!naruto who goes back in time, adopts all the orphans and helps stop the war all the while kakashi is drooling over her bc pretty + powerful = step on me pls. just naru covered in blood, sweetly rocking baby!sai to sleep after she dealt with root, on her way to yank baby!naru from the orphanage while kakashi develops a breeding kink in real time
Kakashi shuddering: we could make so many ANBU teams together
