NDU PsychLab

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Narcissism and Jealousy

by Leila El Khoury

Jealousy is often troublesome within relationships. It can be messy and even disastrous. To make matters worse, recent studies have shown that jealousy can be purposefully solicited from one partner by another. Tortoriello and colleagues (2017) have found that making a romantic partner jealous on purpose is associated with narcissism. Narcissists, in their efforts to orchestrate the perfect crime scene for inducing jealousy, tend to be motivated by seeking power and control over the relationship, exacting revenge, testing the relationship’s strength, seeking security, and compensating for low self-esteem. Yikes. These findings have unpleasant implications for those who may recognize such traits in their partner. Manipulative behavior from a loved one is neither desirable nor easy to deal with. The best course of action would be couple’s therapy or even ending the relationship if things get too ugly.

Reference: Tortoriello, G. K., Hart, W., Richardson, K., & Tullett, A. M. (2017). Do narcissists try to make romantic partners jealous on purpose? An examination of motives for deliberate jealousy-induction among subtypes of narcissism. Personality and Individual Differences, 114, 10-15. doi./10.1016/j.paid.2017.03.052

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Criticism in the Romantic Relationships of Individuals with Social Anxiety

by Yara Awit

Ever noticed that some people find it hard to engage in friendships or relationships? Well here’s one reason why: A lot of those people experience something known as social anxiety which basically worries them when it comes to facing people and social situations. Being socially anxious when you’re in a relationship with someone seems to have a bigger effect on the relationship than you would expect.

While you would think that people who experience a lot of social anxiety would be less judgmental of their partners, apparently, they are not. A study has shown that there is actually no difference when it comes to the partner’s judgments between a person who is greatly anxious in social situations and someone who is way less anxious in the same situation. It is actually the opposite, believe it or not. Those who are socially anxious tend to criticize their partners more than the other way around.

However, for all you guys out there who think women are emotionally sensitive, you’re actually right. It is no surprise that when partners are criticized for their social anxiety, it is woman who are more upset than men.

Here’s a tip for socially anxious individuals. This is based on research so hear us out: It is not your partner’s criticism that is affecting the openness of your relationship. It is the degree to which you experience social anxiety that affects how much you are able to open up. The more anxious you are, the more likely you are to be fearful of letting yourself go with your partner and that will lead you to fear being criticized more than you might actually be. Your anxiety may also be the reason why you are critical of your partner. But guess what? Reality is social anxiety and fear go hand in hand. So be careful not to project your fear onto your partner and try cutting them some slack.

References: Porter, E., Chambless, D. L., & Keefe, J. R. (2017). Criticism in the romantic relationships of individuals with social anxiety. Behavior Therapy, 48(4), 517-532. doi:10.1016/j.beth.2016.11.002

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Spoiler alert: women should stop dieting. Men should start.

by Lea Eid

Ladies, thanks to science, one of the pillars of having a happy relationship is to eat. As for men, the other side of the table awaits to wish you a happy calorie counting.

The topic of dieting has been widely studied over the decades due it’s prevalence in both men and women and in various cultures all over the world. Generally, it is common to expect women, especially in a couple context, to diet and place emphasis over their appearance more than men. However, recent studies have delivered the opposite outcome and drew attention to how dieting is specifically related to intimate relationships. Boyes, Fletcher, and Latner adopted a study whereby its purpose was to assess the link among body satisfaction, self-esteem, depressive symptoms, and dieting patterns within partners.

The results showed that women who have low body satisfaction and high levels of dieting convey high depressive symptoms in their corresponding male partners. The latter could be the consequence of a significant social or sexual withdrawal, excessive need for reassurance over their appearance, and/or extreme restrictions on meal intakes. In contrast, men who have high levels of dieting have shown to have female partners with high self-esteem and low depressive symptoms. This boost in self-esteem, that women receive when her partner diets, is attributed to men putting effort into maintaining their attractiveness for their female partners.

Reference: Boyes, A., Fletcher, G., & Latner, J. (2007). Male and female body image and dieting in the context of intimate relationships. Journal Of Family Psychology, 21(4), 764-768. doi: 10.1037/0893-3200.21.4.764