[motherfucker-somewhat-limited]

[xenosagaepisodeone]

little known fact: this piece is incomplete, before writing the final words banksy became consumed by hubris and jacked off so hard to his artistic genius that he died. the intense blood splatter is what was left upon climax, suggesting that banksy was going to mold this piece into his magnum opus before his great fall. in mourning of this tragic event, residents of nyc suggested that banksy now be referred to as Banksy, The Big Jerk Off.

[wizardcurse]

I should start posting franz kafka style diary quotes but it’s from my journal from when I was 11/12 and obsessed with naruto 

[wizardcurse]

—Saturday 02nd October, 2011. 8:45pm.

[dogpuppy]

[dogpuppy]

[andorerso]

"they make me insane" and it's my own ocs

[coelii]

how my wife and I communicate when we miss each other

[jame7t]

Waiter? For me, your yummiest slices of meats & cheeses. For the lady one yucky berry

[cryptotheism]

Berry Sized Cackling Evil Witch: you always know what to get me

[izzetheking]

do girls eat hot dogs to or is it a boy food only

[prettykikimora-deactivated20250]

Some girls eat double dogs with fries and onions and relish and big pickle on it with mustard all the time and they like it.

[izzetheking]

erm.... OK sista

[memorycycle]

i need someone to put 10000 lbs of garlic and 2000 lbs of onions and 2000000 lbs of salt and 50000000000000 lbs of butter and 50000000000000 lbs of milk into my hands ok

[brucebocchi]

[transmechanicus]

‘You should only send hearts to ppl you’re romantically involved with’

WRONG! BOUNDLESS PLATONIC LOVE, WARMTH, AND ENTHUSIASM BE UPON YE!!!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[crabussy-beastwhimsy]

big fan of these stairs from a rental listing I was looking at. it gets worse the more you look at it I think. ghoulish

[g4tzby]

human cat tree w/ scratching post

[anxietyproblem]

[drumlincountry]

Why do they even make apps for ADHD. You want me to use my 24/7 handheld immediate distraction device? To manage my 'gets distracted too easily' disorder? Ooooh we developed the perfect tool for managing your anemia. Its hosted in Dracula's castle. 👍

[incisedwound]

[coenoflaslea]

damn they need to add some kind of warning that there are new cutscenes in oblivion remastered. just booted up the game and martin septim appeared out of nowhere he kissed the hero of kvatch with tongue too. sorry todd i didn't know you were chill like that