Stockholm Syndrome

Undefined. Norway.

[yeoja]

why is lotion so annoying to apply i want to be soft and smooth but this is too much

[owlcitytweets]

[beyond-authority]

Update!

[the-great-void]

Mr. City

[timetrees]

#mr city was my father please call me owl

[archillect]

[elfpen]

It’s a scientifically verifiable fact that straight men are only capable of watching a handful of television shows:

The Office

How I Met Your Mother

Game of Thrones

Friends

Breaking Bad

The Simpsons

and if they’re feeling particularly out of the box,

Frasier

[cheesey-toast]

You forgot Big Bang Theory

[elfpen]

I DID, HOW COULD I

[justwaitingformrdarcy]

Pride and Prejudice and Arrested Development-style narration

[writing-prompt-s]

The world’s tiniest dragon must defend his hoard, a single gold coin, from those who would steal it.

[mildswearingat4am]

Suggestion: The dragon’s definition of “steal” is somewhat loose. It still allows the coin to be used and bartered and change hands–but on one condition: the dragon must be with it at all times.

They become a familiar sight in the marketplace.

“Here’s your change, ma'am. One gold piece.” The merchant holds out a palm, on top of which rests a tiny, brilliantly colored creature clutching a single gold coin.

“That’s a dragon,” you say dumbly. “One piece… and a dragon.”

“Yes.”

You cautiously reach out and attempt to take your change. You tug. It holds. You tug harder. The dragon lets loose a tiny, protective growl.

“Ma'am–no, ma'am, you have to take the dragon, too.”

“Sorry?”

The seller notes your dubious expression. “Not from around here, are ya?” They shrug. “Them’s the rules. Take the coin, take the dragon.”

They wait expectantly. Wondering how the world has so suddenly gone mad, you slowly, slowly hold out your hand.

The dragon perks right up. It scampers from their palm to yours with the coin clamped in its jaws and scales your sleeve with sharp little claws.

“Have a nice day, ma'am,” the merchant says. “Spend him soon, now, you hear? At another booth, if you can. He likes to travel.”

From its perch upon your shoulder, the dragon lets out a happy trill.

[bdubs8807]

Bonus: the coin eventually passes to the rogue in a group of travelling adventurers. The dragon becomes the mascot of the entire group, and they lay out a small pile of coins for him to sleep on every night, clutching his coin like a teddy bear.

[euphorichords]

This is so pure I am in love

[loveage-moondream]

[bitchycode]

‪What part of “i don’t wanna spend anymore money” don’t I understand

[janeaustentextposts]

[halfagony-halfhope]

Me watching Elizabeth Bennet rejecting rude men:

[babyanimalgifs]

These are perfect

[just-shower-thoughts]

It doesn’t matter how old you get, buying snacks for a road trip always feels like you are an unsupervised 8 year old who was given money.

[just-shower-thoughts]

Some stupid fish crawled out of the water 35 million years ago and now we have to deal with taxes smh

[singerrrsongwriterrr-deactivate]

I follow this page on Facebook called Toilets With Threatening Auras and well…

[singerrrsongwriterrr-deactivate]

[tadpoledancer]

POST MORE

[singerrrsongwriterrr-deactivate]

As you wish!

[singerrrsongwriterrr-deactivate]

[singerrrsongwriterrr-deactivate]

And just because…

[themakeupbrush]

Marchesa S/S 2015

[trainthief]

wish customer service jobs operated w video game standards, so a customer would come up to me and i’d say “greetings traveler! looking to trade?” and they’d only had 4 options for their response 

[trainthief]

i’d just stand there wiping down the same part of the counter for 8 hours until my shift ended and then id drop everything and walk away and if you tried to interact with me i’d just keep running into you silently until you moved 

[scenicroutes]

[walks around with an entire big mac in my mouth but never actually biting down] It’s a metaphor, see: you put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don’t give it the power to do its killing.

[sweetstardrop]

you took this from a fault in our stars augustus does the same thing only with a cigarette ok ok

[scenicroutes]

i don’t know what you’re talking about this is an excerpt from my upcoming 100% original novel “the fart in our stalls”