[REDACTED]

Lemon. | Chemistry student.

[gorbling]

Im enjoying the longevity of tumblrs recontextualization style of humor. a seemingly innocuous post followed by like "posts that a gnome would make" or like "are you a phone"

[gorbling]

[hapalopus]

[hapalopus]

More from the notes:

[fufudoe]

orth and john gustav klimt patterns on john <3

[flutterbvnny]

daddy has regretfully informed kitten that we need a dual income household to survive

[ratajota]

[indigonite]

This getting your eyes and mind hijacked by an eldritch being is easy

[whyenn-reader]

"ingredients you can pronounce" i can pronounce anything

lets have phone sex over walkie talkies

[rninor-blog]

“bend over” “bend what? over”

[striderofthen0rth]

I hate this place

[0ddoblivion]

Inflation is fucking crazy rn

[nerdlemons]

STICKS THIS IN YOUR BACK

FEESH‼️

[tothechaos]

aw what the hell change my leitmotif to a minor key im not driving

[avagarde]

It’s so unfair i don’t get to see where evolution will go in 50 million years

[geekysteven]

crab

[existennialmemes]

Crustaceans: Crab

Mammals: Weasel

Plants: Tree

Amphibians & Reptiles: Unchanged because they are perfect

Birds: 360° around back to dinosaurs

Fungi: I shan't speculate on the affairs of gods

[pukicho]

fuck/marry/kill father son holy spirit

That's one guy, you fucking shit

[pervigilatrix]

Council of Nicea, 325 C.E.

[everyday-cutephoto]

[gauntletqueen]

"that's right, your majesty! You are in dire need of a new freezer... Do not concern yourself with the large cardboard container in which it shall be delivered! Just let your lowly advisor take care of that..."

[teaboot]

Highly unlikely to be of use but I want a card I can carry in my wallet that says “If I Die First In A Traumatic Survival Scenario I Want You To Know I’m Okay With You Cannibalizing Me, It’s Fine, Don’t Be Weird And Guilty About it”. And then on the back there could be like. A list of recipes n shit

[teaboot]

To be clear, I don’t WANT to be cannibalized. It’s not my personal preference. It’s just that if I beef it out in the open somewhere and some poor starving fuck has to have a crisis of ethics over using the protein or dying in a hole, I’d want to some way to let them know my dead ass is rooting for them

[teaboot]

New Hot Take: I Think An Organ Donor Card Counts In A Pinch, Actually

[sermna]

When you're unsuccessfully looking for something and start gradually increasing your It Could Be There range. Like yeah sure maybe the rice cooker pot is in the freezer, idk

[jame7t]

Dude my coworker left a scrumptious cookie unattended

[jame7t]

Uh, your honor? I scrumped it

[crowcaws]

Incredible events unfolding on reddit

[crowcaws]

[crowcaws]

I would die for Tessa. I would find her 200 toothbrushes.

[crowcaws]

So it looks like Tessa has been using these veggietales toothbrushes for ages, but has misplaced the stash.