The greatest wit that the worst of humanity has to offer. (NOTE: These posts don't display correctly in the Tumblr App, because the Tumblr App sucks giant donkey balls.)
Now, first of all, I’m perfectly aware that many of the following comments are, themselves, satire. But they aren’t funny satire, and enough of the comments seem legit that I’m going to have to assume that I’ve stumbled into a writhing mass of complete morons.
Now, many people got the joke just fine.
But the ones who didn’t...
When I was a kid, parents would bemoan the fact that kids weren’t taught Critical Thinking in schools anymore. I’m here to tell you, it’s only gotten worse. Now parents aren’t teaching critical thinking, either. (I work with kids on a regular basis, and the number of times I’ve heard eight year olds having conversations about The Illuminati is absolutely insane. I love modern technology, but when I was a wee nugget the computer was in the living room and your parents could see everything you were doing and the very first time you stumbled across Jeff Rense’s website they could put a stop to that shit. Kids are now able to take in any old bullshit when their unprepared brains aren’t physically developed enough to sort the wheat from the chaff. Kids will believe whatever you tell them up to a certain age because that is how the human brain learns and we are telling them everything.)
We also have the Town Crier folks, who feel the need to warn us about the video, in much the same way that one would warn about a virus on a torrent site. (Not that I would know anything about that.)
And the curious ones who want to know HOW this is possible:
And the ones who have almost grasped it. They’re aware that it’s possible that this might be a joke, but they’re not... quite... sure.
And some people are just confused and scared.
Yep. Satyr.
Ph.D. in WHAT?! Good lord.
I legitimately fear for the future of the human race. I want to say “Remember the good ol’ days when COPPA prevented tiny idiot children from publicly spewing their youthful ignorance all over the internet at large?” but I remember being… however old these people are (Six? Four?) and already having a firm grasp of fucking satire.
Every one of these people is going to grow up to become that idiot relative who posts misspelled, jingoistic screeds on Facebook about some enraging article they just read in The Onion.
But even more worrying, I think, are the ones who don’t seem to grasp the concept of “acting” and feel the need to declare this video “fake.” Fake is such a weird word to use in this context. Let’s say you go to a kids’ birthday party, and there’s a clown there, because the parents are sadists. If the clown is clearly just the kid’s uncle Jeff with facepaint on because the sadist parents didn’t want to spend three hundred smackers on an actual clown that went to Clown College, you might say to someone “that’s a fake clown.” But this, this is more like there being a professional balloon-shaping, nose-honking clown present, and saying “that’s a fake clown” because you suspect that at the end of the day the clown goes home and takes the makeup off and is, in fact, secretly a human being.
They’re like the aliens in Galaxy Quest.
“Is there no one on your planet who behaves in a way that’s contrary to reality?”
“You are speaking of…”
(“Deception.”)
“Deception.”
(“Lies.”)
“Lies.”
“We have only recently become aware of this concept.”
But shoutout to the MVPs:
(Note: This post doesn’t feature the typical list of comment links, ostensibly to protect the guilty but really just because there are so fucking many of them.)
turnnoffyourmind
prguitarman
discoholicmusic
2087
snowghoul
vaporwave
