Captain Of This Ship

I'm Noah. Shakespeare enthusiast with a passion for tattoos and music. I like feeling pretty. Pre-Op FtM// Gay// ENFP// Slytherin// Pisces

[regionallatworst]

fuk u brendon

[onlydadjokes]

I asked my nephew how old his dad was and he replied “six”. I said how can he only be six if you’re six?

He said “because he’s only been a dad since I was born”

[weekesthetic]

the end. // my chemical romance

[saddestbpd]

*dissociates so hard that someone asks me if I am on drugs*

[noahwayray]

Protect "fake fans"

Protect new fans that only just

discovered the band

Protect new fans that still only know the band's biggest hits

Protect new fans that love the band's music, but don't know anything about the band members

Protect new fans that love songs, but can't remember the names of them

Protect new fans that love all their songs, but don't know all the words

Protect new fans that only know the newest album

Protect new fans that haven't been to a concert yet

Protect new fans that have only discovered the band recently, but are already falling in love with their music.

Protect new fans that are quickly falling in love with the band, but are pushed out of the fanbase for being "fake fans".

[awsugar]

IVE WAITED SEVEN FUCKING YEARS HOLY SHIT

[awsugar]

[noahwayray]

me: *buys something online*

me:

me: where is it

[samleeuhl]

Spread the word.

[theshantiestme11ophone]

The fucking game is rigged

[dreamboatsandtrenchcoats]

Instead of saying motherfucker you can just say Oedipus

[m-ignon]

Half our generation wouldn’t even understand that

[genderchilled]

yes you are right the thousands of notes on this post prove how ignorant our generation is. only you are intelligent. you are the chosen one.

[nodaybuttodaytodefygravity]

only real Ancient Greek kids would understand

[microscopically-deactivated2014]

reblog if ur a tru 650BC kid

[never-that-important-somebody]

No, fuck you. I was good enough. But you made me believe I wasn’t.

(via cappadonnapapi)

[qumi]

mutual: hey

me: ❤️💗💖💛💘💙💝💙💝💝💚💘💛💘💘💛💝💝💙💝💘💙💘💚💖💖💘💛💘💘💗💗💗💙💝💚💝💟💞💝💘💘💙💖💚💖💚💚💟💟💚💝

[ohfolie]

Save Yourself, I’ll Hold Them Back // MCR for @awsugar

[noahwayray]

So what if the next Deadpool movie started like every white teen movie?

*valley girl voice* hi, My name's Wade.... And I'm not like those other girls, oh no. I'm not a cheerleader, or emo, or a nerd. I'm just Wade. *pan over to Spider-Man". That's Peter. He is soooo hot. He's like if Ryan Reynolds and Andrew Garfield had a baby. *pans back to him* but me? I'm just Wade. And this is my story * Dirty Little Secret plays*

[thespacegoat-deactivated2016100]

• Accidentally close a tab? Ctrl+Shift+T reopens it. • Bananas release dopamine, eat them when you’re sad. • CTRL+SHIFT+ESC is the one handed version of CTRL+ALT+DEL • Don’t brush your teeth hard, it makes them sensitive and removes enamel. • Don’t like spiders? Put citronella oil on your walls and they will not go there. • Drink one glass of water for every alcoholic drink you have, you’ll get drunk without getting a hangover. • Get clear ice cubes by boiling water before freezing it • Heal paper cuts and immediately stop the pain with chapstick. • If you accidentally write on your dry erase board with a permanent marker, scribble over it with a dry eraser marker to remove it. • If your shoes smell, put them in the freezer overnight, it will kill the bacteria.  • Make bug bites stop itching with a banana peel. • Make a paper longer with 12-point text, but 14-point periods and commas. • Need to get around a blocked website at work? Try replacing the http:// with https:// • Never send your resume as a word file (unless asked) Instead, print it to a pdf file, it’s much cleaner and professional looking. • Pick a flavor of gum you don’t normally chew, and chew it while studying during a test. • Place a piece of bread in a container with your homemade cookies and  they will stay soft. • Put a dry towel into a dryer with wet clothes, they will dry faster. • Put toothpaste on a pimple and it will dry out. • Practise fake smiling in the mirror every day before going to work/school, you’ll genuinely start to feel happier. • Rub canola/olive oil on knives before cutting onions, you won’t cry, alternatively chew gum and you won’t either. • Short on time with a wrinkled dress shirt? Hang it up in the bathroom to steam it flat. • The night before, place things you don’t want to forget the next morning on top of your shoes. • Use hydrogen peroxide to remove blood stains from clothing. • When cleaning windows use newspapers or coffee filters instead of paper towels, they will not leave streaks. • When microwaving bread products/pizza put a glass of water in with it, it will keep your bread for going spongy. • When you move into a new place you’re renting, take pictures of any and all damage, then post them on facebook (privately if preferred) so you can use the reference date as proof you didn’t do it. • When searching plane tickets online delete your cookies prior, prices go up when you visit a site multiple times.

[playboydreamz]

FINALLY THIS IS ON MY BLOG! I WAITED MONTHS TO SEE THIS AGAIN!!!

[joshanddrake]

[astrolojercy]

Why is it I have never seen this before in my life

[corgis-everywhere]

[ptrckstmph-blog]

#this looks like an election ad

[toodeepforyou]

a vote for leaf doge is a vote for america