"Whether consciously or unconsciously, to the world or to themselves, no one ever says what they really want to say." Heimdall- [HEIMDAL X FEM/ dwarve READER]
Btw this is a small run down how I saw "heimdalls" character i know my writing is pretty premature/ a povs are lazily english ain't my first language )
Atleast I'll have someone that I can keep around to have my mind off things.... all fathers orders and tasks are top priority but I can feel myself taking glimpses of this girl in my free time... shes probably aware of it by how much she runs to locations to avoid me....
She doesnt talk back very very primitive still but very very submissive remains passive to avoid any of my actions is like shes aware I'm about to test her shes given me zero eye contact because she knows I will decipher her thoughts and actions, but she doesnt give me the satisfaction of a reaction I dont wanna completely force out of her the pleasure will be too small for the price I want....
Shes a seamstress (our seamstress) a very prestige one sif is always asking her for more colors and expensive silk for her dresses the softest fur in all nine realms the most durable but elegant jewelry forged by dwarves materials. Every order she places the more tired and stressed she gets because she has to deal with me "looking" out for theses things.... she is forced to hunt, tracks and identify theses materials I can "help" but for a price.... she almost got eaten by a bear.... she was lucky I wasnt so far behind or cruel enough... she isnt a figther nor a hunter so she clearly prefers threading in heavy waters just to avoid me getting near her.
Her hands are already caught up in the war that will soon happen in ragnarok, she seems to be handling it poorly typical of aesir cattle Odin has them only for us to only reproduce in this realm not outside of it, I doudt we have options with other gods since they already burn Odin's good Grace's... but I wouldnt stick it to a giant thoses slow and oblivious creatures....
Typical aesir cattle life by carrying precious materials to dwarves have zero speaking privileges with any of them outside of her own kind the all father doesn't allow inner "communication" in his presence or the land of asgard he watches with the crows I watch her with my mind..... the great all father blessed me with all sight, speed, strength but sadly it had developed me to lack trust in others on how far I can "see" in them....
She avoids being alone now such a sneaky... little pet I willl catch her even if it takes watching her bathing with her clothes on ....
I will add a little tattoo on you're pretty little neck, have my name written over that face and some small "meanings" in each part of youre body from hands to knees... you are angry but because of fear being vulnerable, defenseless, scared..... maybe even ..... hope that I wouldnt go that far but thats the thing isn't? You cant predict that..... a scary thought to a small human woman....
What the hell? Did my eyes dissive me ? Did I caught you walking between realms? What the hell are you? A half breed? Dont you ever.... ever attempt to do that you hear me!!? The all father would had thrown you off this wall!! Dont you fear for you're life? Not even a little bit? Dont you care about you're pathetic future??!??! Ohhhh you have earn yourself a permanent job on my side! I don't need a pupil I need you're servitude and If that suffers a violation I wont allow it to reach further, thoses eyes will be confiscated and whatever little freedom you had is permanently tarnished.....
I want to give you a gift one that is considered "noble" to aesir gods and probably a big meaning to you're little half human minds.... this silver necklace and bracelet are matching set dont loose it my little sunshine....
Oh and a small little side note.... speak any of this to an outsider and that necklace and bracelet become weights... good luck!
I love it when you stay quiet and gently have my way
My little puny ant my sweet sweet little hard worker that is doing her best just to be over shadowed by the gods..... atleast you're prayers are some what answered with little to no return....
theres a mess between us .... made me loose myself there couldnt bare the thought of... forgetting my purpose hm....
Heimdall rest his hand on her belly predicting the gender before her...
"Oh it's a boy!, a strong and very handsome young man capable of defending himself in battle such joy!"
His eyes slither on you're sight, you didnt look at him only at you're belly wondering if the child will turn out like HIM ..... the mid wife woman started to dote on you jumping of joy and holding you're hand so tightly
"Oh y/n the joy! The JOY! Being picked to be aesir lineage! With a boy on the way! What name you wish to place him my mistress?"
Y/n wondered what name could fit the little imp inside of you wondering if you truly wanted to give "heimdall" such blessing or "satisfaction".....
You look at you're giddy mid wife and replied to her question....
Heimdall smirk quickly trickled and he exhaled...
"Mogni? That sounds..... very very familiar to some clumsy useless asses....."
You locked eyes with you're mid wife and said "oh but atleast modi and magni had a bit of charisma, sure they messed with me just to get under youre skin but doesnt that suit such godly blood line I think it sounds cute!"
Heimdall shot daggers back at you
"Oh that name will be laughed at mocked even dragged to the mud with such characters attached to it with withered reputations I will not name my child after THEM, maybe name him "ask arr" for now since he is after all a half human"
He stood up and walked out with odin to head into another mission, the mid wife looked so terrified seeing heimdalls reaction to youre response....
"Oh ask arr, is a lovely name mrs. Y/n such blessings to you and you're forever place in Valhalla!"
You sencirely dont believe you're poor soul have any redemption after having aesirs god child all father already doom his lineage for killing Ymir the creator of all living things that came from his arm pits and feet..... so many gods, giants, dwarves, humans were punished by Odin's ruling leaving a wasteland behind....
"Ask arr, will you be a good one? A good god? A god that can redem himself from what's to come? Could you ever see humans as people? Not as cattle like theses gods? Will you ever listen to human mothers voice? Will you respond kindly to said voice?"
Do you know that having aesir gods child will have consequences? Do you know that you might die giving birth to it? Maybe suffer a curse if you survive it?
That's why I'm trying to spend as much time with you y/n the world and time itself holds an unknown future for you..... a very uncertain outcome one you could never predict.... maybe that little woman human could be the child's aunt before me and the all father take him away after well.... a certain time period but oh dont you worry she will atleast get schedule visits to him for a few moments we have so much to learn and undo if thats the case!
Do you see that village down there over the big wall that keeps giants out..... that's were I grew up in and taken by the all fathers "blessing" to be married with his "kin" they didnt just took me they took every young women so they can find every single one of his children a "wife".... a pick and choose which could be wed into the family. Is not a blessing it isnt safe or even freedom in asgard you do what you need to do or what has to be done or you will suffer for it.....
I struggled to accept any type of connection I wasnt always distrusting people, I can hardly remember my guardians face he was strict wasn't going to sugar coat things refuses to accept failure he always encourage me, told me to hone my skills like a diamond under pressure he told me to aim higher, be capable and always eager to learn .... at this rate i a believe asgard is the highest I've been.... if he knew what my life has become he probably dissapointed ...I cant change my faith in this situation, I cant face heimdall I cant leave asgard.... I dreamt jumping off the hall to my death I doudt heimdall will ever allow me near the edge of it if he did, he will dangle me just to scare me but honestly that would be 10 time better than to deal with him....
Yes I'm pregnant not by own choice , if I could choose who to marry and be in love with it wouldnt be HIM for sure ever since heimdall placed his hands on my stomach telling me the baby's future / gender made me very uncomfortable even if I had pleasant company lf my midwife/ aunty.....
She kept squealing with joy telling what I was gonna name the child telling me advice how to raise one since she had previous experience with her siblings (her being the eldest of 11 kids n counting ) I know I shouldn't tell her the grimy details and my issues but man it hurts not having people you can be open with I wish I can just..... escape even it meant death.....
Magni and modi both built like mountains and were troublesome to the town of asgard... were two idiots who harrased me and interrupted people I guess their father lack of love and attention cause them to seek elsewhere even if it is negative... they would randomly approach my quarters and interrupt my progress on the jewellery design/ material unity with their "questions" even asking me if I wanted to experience "flying" I dont wanna over step on my "powerless" stature so I just nodded and kept my hands on my work modi will randomly tell me how he wanted a nicer belt a matching set like his older brothers / fathers clothes but with a "unique look" I remade his clothes so many times I'm actually thinking hes having a identity crisis being smushed between his brother and father..... magni will purposely take off his jewelry and dump it on my table for me to fix it and remove his additional garments right infront me, not sure if gods dont know what "personal" space is but I get uncomfortable when he stares at me for too long.... heimdall will show up and tell them off, they will taunt him saying how they "gave me a good time" when he wasnt there UGH if I ever wanted a bunch of disgusting unwashed worn down unstable mommy n daddy issues alchohol stinking men in my presence.... heimdall will always pull his sword and get behind one of them while having the weapon drawn at them "say is that so?" "I dont see any truth to that "
They would take the challenge of the drawn sword and take the "business" outside while I work on the new commissions of each individual heimdall will specifically place orders on earrings, bracers, shoes or sword holsters.... he will EXTREMELY specific and will expect no imperfections he will do this while standing behind me or infront of me or standing against a wall sipping beer slowly staring a hole on my head hoping I will entertain him....
Baldur's is Odin's favorite because he gets to torment frig with it, the goddess of love of the vaenir couldnt win or get away from Odin's knots and abuse, he tried to sell her to another god as a peace offering once too or the time that she tattoo baldur's body with protection seals and "curse" to protect him from harm..... causing baldur to delude himself and go mannic because the lack of feel, touch, pleasure he couldnt even feel the tempature of this room.... odin love it the idea of his son to be immortal and possibility of having the same spell casted on him.... such a scary thought... baldur will randomly appear in my quarters with many things to fix after long prolonged fights/damage or abuse dragons holsters, his belted waist garments his strapped leather fined boots beaten to hell and back everything was torned, ripped to pieces burned far from recognition.... this guy gave up on how he was percieved...
I'm so glad I have a little ear to listen my rambles until i can get my head straight to more important matters you dont want that interfering with our "quality" time do we?
Who do you devote you're heart and soul to? Which whom gifted you a son and a beloved wedding of you're choosing a matching gem stone the reflects my eyes no less? Heimdall the all seeker of asgard the guardian that stands between asgard and the great wall.....
The bracers you gifted me are quite treated how much tread, leather and sleepeless nights you spent on theses? You know I love it when you devote yourself to you're aesir GOD husband cute little offerings here and there are always appreciated.....
Heimdall always had his guard down around me because he assumed I couldnt hurt him not in a godly way, anyways.... I forged him a "ring" made with love and "admiration" he looked at it and said "is that it? You finally getting to you're senses? All it took for me is to give you a son?.... Interesting"
Heres the trick I'm half dwarf / half human that ring shrinks when time goes on so suspicion falls to 0... what he cant see through my intentions "aka eyes" he cannot predict or be sure my abilities to create weapons hasnt been honed or developed (again I was brought in because marriage purposes /of heimdall + being aesirs personal seamstress) so is not like I can walk up to a forged that will piss off heimdall and Odin specially when they can't let people know that they "procreated" with giants..... and seeing a human around dwarves forging materials / practicing with them will look very bad for their "image" . I tried to sneak in a dagger but heimdall will immediately tell me to cough it up and "let this go smoothly for you're OWN safety" the amount of times he stick his hands in my clothes, shoes, hair to look for anything "dangerous"( is ridiculous more like a TSA check up in a airport ) If ragnarok happens i hope heimdall doesnt live to see it, so i can make my escape
Trusting the presence of a god is unwise
What do you gain for attacking us?
Lies you fight us to protect something
Let you're death be a mortal one
No get away from my mother !
Theses injuries no please mother dont die I will be better I will be stronger dont please
Dont let fear of death it will eat away at you're future we will all be layed to rest. ...
Ah yes let the norns tell you a poetic version of you're own reality instead of having your god husband to do so what you will hear wont be very comforting
Not being part of much more than just her husbands property have no say of her own actions or future stuck in her thoughts praying to someone else instead of the aesir pantheon pityness
A human entangled by a gods affairs trapped in a helpless, horrifying situation.....
Birthing a son with the same fate as her husbands part of all fathers crazed plans with no choice in sight, such a pathetic life to live with such little redemption or safety promise...
Oh and that "guardian" you seem to mention in such a good light? He was spineless coward that abandoned you or should I refraise it as giving you away to the all fathers wishes? tsk parent of the YEAR such an embarrassment he got on his marry way to the ocean and never came back for you! Why do you THINK he will ever come back hes probably a father to a new child leaving you in the past! Is that what you want to be living in past that could never be? Dreaming about being some mortals wife? A man that can be killed so easily? Is that how you mortals wanna live on a time limit? Have a expiration date? Is that how you cherish you're love ones? He lied, he left you and never WILL he ever come back that's the truth the UGLY reality that you have to learn to accept, I saw through him and knew his intentions to leave you was to save his OWN hide now you are stuck with me until you're human body can no longer stand on its own two feet! Mark my words y/n you will always come back to me even death!"
How can a human protect a god? What happens if heimdall dies what would I do? Everyone will try to kill him because of his own family's history he will be a target towards everyone outside of asgard..... what would I do if that came to happen? What can I human do? What can I do? I will be rejected, shamed even killed if admit who his father was or what my child and me had a relation with.....
"Atleast I know that if I DID had a mortal man he wouldn't harm me as much as you, if a mortal man harm me I could bury him on the next day but a god? A GOD???? If he outlives me I will be lucky! My child will be target to other gods and hated by all living things all because his father and his whole family were a bunch of killers, enslavers to everyone!!!!"
"You worry about the most silliest things asgard wont fall and the all father and me will make sure of that..."
I heard the horn, it transported itself on my lap .. the giant monster erupting through asgard great wall, heard thrud and all father speak about heimdalls death I couldnt believe it. I'm free I can actually escape walk out like nothing happened maybe atleast not be dragged anymore into asgards affairs I'm not cattle anymore ..... I am free
I didnt felt hate seeing his lifeless body maybe a sense of closure and peace that I wont be under a gods judgment or violence anymore, but it didnt stop me to gently hold his head close to me it felt...... oddly comforting this is the closest thing of affection I've ever recieved of years being stuck at asgard maybe his thumb or finger tracing my cheek meant more than a intolerable moment maybe if the all father was ..... different maybe things wouldn't had turned out like this....
