[alyakthedorklord]

Bruce Wayne, sitting in a cute eco-friendly cafe while on a video call with Tim: Oh Noooo, are you sure there’s no way the board of directors will let us get rid of this old decrepit Wayne Factory building that is unsafe for our workers and also for the surrounding environment?

CEO Tim, with equal gravitas: No, I’m afraid they just won’t budge. It technically meets legal requirements on paper, and we can’t prove that the chemicals affecting the local ecosystem that have no other possible source are from the out-of-date drainage system… they’re saying it would cost too much to fix the place up too, which is ridiculous, because we’re us, but our hands are tied…

Bruce, full Brucie himbo mode: Oh I just feel so SAD for all the sweet fluffy animals and the pretty flowers and especially our hard workers dealing with such unsafe conditions… I think I’ll give them all a nice short vacation this weekend, so the ENTIRE PLACE will be EMPTY and SHUT DOWN from FRIDAY TO TUESDAY, the SECURITY SYSTEM WILL BE DOWN because it’s just so GLITCHY, I’m sure nothing will happen to the ENVIRONMENTAL STAIN ON OUR COMPANIES NAME THAT WILL BE COMPLETELY ABANDONED FROM FRIDAY TO TUESDAY- Timmy do you think I’m being too subtle?

Tim, snickering: no no you’re doing great Bruce I’m sure they’ve got it

Poison Ivy, on a date the next table over: ( ‘-‘)-☕️

Harley, through tears of repressed laughter: so… we doing anythin’ this weekend?

[inactiveaccount12345678]

My roomba is scared of thunderstorms

I was sitting at my desk just a few minutes ago, drawing, and a really loud crack of thunder went off–no power surges or anything, just thunder–and my roomba fled from its dock and started spinning in circles

I currently now have an active roomba sitting quietly on my lap

[systlin]

Humans will pack bond with anything. 

[shyravenns]

Valarr sketch! Probably taking a moment of breathe after a grueling training session

[teddyandrosie]

beating him up in the tiltyard as punishment for occupying my thoughts

[fleabatbites]

CIEL: Vampire Requiem

[stillnotsquashed]

Damian: Out of respect for the Robin name, I have been researching the person who originated it: Mary Grayson (nee Lloyd). Bruce: Oh, find anything good? Damian: Were you aware she had a criminal record? Bruce: Yes. Tim: Of course. I have a copy of it at home. Jason: I mean I didn't. But I'm not surprised. Damian: Why not? Jason: Because I've met her son. I imagine Mary Grayson was involved in every anti-authoritarian protest she came across on her travels. What I would be more interested in is learning exactly what Janet Drake was up to to create Master Stalker over there.

[aliteralchicken]

Tim getting questioned by his school for having bruises (canon) + Tim wearing makeup to cover his bruises (canon) + tim being very popular in the schools he went to (canon) = Tim accidentally starting a boys wearing makeup too trend at his school during peak 90’s/early 00’s (not canon but plausible and will piss off Chuck Dixon so it’s real to me 🙂‍↕️)

[brucewaynehater101]

I have been missing a cornerstone of the parental!Tim AUs:

Parental rage.

Tim tends to go a wee bit off the rails every time Bruce is in mortal danger. He's willing to forsake everything so that Bruce is safe. He is generally protective, but that gets pushed to the extreme whenever Bruce dies.

A good parentified!Tim scene could have him drowning in rage, anguish, and desperation because he doesn't want to bury his kid

[papayafromtv]

like, 90% of the time when i see Tim Drake as Joker Junior stuff it includes Jason being like, either traumatised or really uncomfortable with the whole thing because of the Ethiopia incident, but i gotta say i think the opposite would be wayyyyy more entertaining.

Jason finds out Tim was turned into Joker Junior and was, in essence, Joker's adopted son for a while, and his first instinctual thought is 'alright well that kid has to be mine now.'

like, i don't think a lot of us take into account regarding the Joker that Jason isn't always just... terrified of everything Joker-centric. he straight up stole the Red Hood mantle from the guy. he loves jokerized seasoning on his fries. when he first came back to Gotham to kill the Joker he just kinda nabbed him and threw him in a closet all tied up for a while so he could go antagonise Bruce. like, Jason doesn't give a fuck. it's not always fear that fuels his rage against the Joker, it's fuckin' spite.

with that in mind, i think it would be funnier if Jason found out that Joker tried to make Tim into his son and instantly responded with 'ok well fuck the Joker, Tim is now MY son.' and Bruce just has to watch forlorn from the batcomputer as his kid is stolen by his other kid like. at least they aren't fighting this time?

i think Tim was supremely worried about Jason's reaction to Joker Junior stuff, too. like. he fully thought he'd spark a panic attack or get himself killed once Jason found out. instead he accidentally lets out a Joker-laugh one time and Jason's just like fuck yeah kid let it out.

Tim: ...does it not freak you out, or like, remind you of him? Jason: buddy are you joking? i'm wearing one of his old costumes. i have stolen his child. that man is a narcissist who loves attention, the worst revenge we can do to him is to just take all his gimmicks and leave him a nobody. steal his fucking laugh, Timmers, we gotta take that asshole for all he's worth. Tim: ...huh. you know i never thought of it that way. Jason: yeah. me and Harley are thinking of starting up a FWB situation just to really ruin his day. Bruce, yelling from three rooms away: *completely resigned* please do not do that, Jason, ignoring him: -it will also piss off Bruce, which is two birds one stone. Bruce: Jason please i went to school with her. Jason: if we start a family group chat i'll add you, don't worry. Tim: Tim: your way of dealing with trauma is weird.

[brucewaynehater101]

Take this legal concept with a grain of salt, but a fascinating scene could involve a character *not* saving another.

By this, I mean that character A *isn't* the cause of character B's fatal situation. They never harmed B. Yet, they do nothing. No help. No call to emergency services. No other actions.

A stares down at B indifferently, coldly. They watch B's breaths become shallow, their face pale, and the light draining from their eyes. At last, when B's chest finally stills, A walks away and never looks back.

[brucewaynehater101]

There are so many scenarios this can fit:

A warned B that they wouldn't help if B got themself in danger. B, whether they believed this or not, still did so

A is tired. They are so fucking tired that they don't care about B anymore

A doesn't know B. Why should they care about B's fate?

A's never seen someone die and B is right there. It's a bit more boring than they thought

A has tried to help people before, and they've always paid for it. They can no longer afford the cost of empathy

B tried to kill A and ended up dying instead

B is a famous bastard. A doesn't know if any of it's true, but they are unwilling to save someone with that kind of reputation

B is a sacrfice. A knows what happens to those who save sacrifices

A's emotions have been altered. They *should* care about B dying, but they don't

[femmebatman]

Reverse robins Stephbin and Duke so good because on the high chance Bruce doesn’t reveal his identity to Stephanie there is just no way he can keep Stephanie and Duke from meeting and once they meet the SECOND Duke gets wind that Stephanie has no clue who Batman is Duke WILL be revealing that man’s identity cuz why are you lying to a middle schooler while you risk her life every night like

[brucewaynehater101]

Cass should use cheesy dad merch - shirts, slippers, cups, hoodies, hats, etc.

Just her rocking a "Coolest Dad" shirt

[katanahime]

By the way, the questions of "Who is the biggest Tim glazer, Bruce or Dick?" and "Who is the biggest Dick glazer, Bruce or Tim?" are both rather close, like we are talking President and Vice President of the respective fanclubs.

But the question of who is the biggest Bruce glazer is Dick. And it's not close. Not remotely. He's the biggest Bruce glazer alive. And Tim doesn't even really glaze Bruce. But Tim is conversely the biggest Bruce excuser, which is like the opposite while maintaining positive feelings. So basically if Bruce actually fucks up, Tim ends up like "well what did you expect?" and Dick is like "BETTER OF HIM" which is why Dick is the one that gets angry.

[hyperblue]

bro is that fucking jason todd

[ashoss]

yes

[sushizushi6]

Apology for tumblr for forgetting to post stuff

[urktola]

Hello summer!

[my-dailydreams]