There is this creeping feeling that rises in your chest. A slow, steady build up almost as if someone left the faucet on but forgot to tell you about it. You’re waist deep but keep moving because you figure it’ll get drained by some outside source; live in this denial you’ve crafted for yourself because if everyone around you can hold it together, you sure as shit can too.
That is, until the seams start to come undone and that one, teeny-tiny crack you got from the last overflow breaks again and you fall, fall so fast that sudden laughter turns into wretched tears and you are drowning in it all.
---
You shut them all out, too unstable to answer another question, to chat with another person. It’s all you can do to hold yourself together but you try. Archons know you try. You cross your heart, you swear to yourself that you won’t open that door for anyone but what could you do when it opened on it’s own and in stepped the only person who could throw you a life line.
“Y/N?” Diluc’s voice is so soft, warm, comforting like the fire you sit beside in the evening. It’s richness reminds you how delectable his embrace is but you can’t bring yourself to ask for it.
The pacing, the shaking, and the tears right on the verge tell him something isn’t right but you beg him not to ask you because no matter your answer it’s not going to be good enough to justify you breaking the way you are. What could possibly give you the right to crumbling so weakly before anyone - you should be stronger than this, you are better than this, you are -- you are --
“Diluc ...” You cover your face with your hands and let out the sobs that have been so silent up till now. A hand extends toward him and he captures it in his strength, his arms curl around you and his chin rests on the crown that’s fallen from your head. “I’m - I’m so stressed out. Everyone is coming at me at the same time and they keep asking, asking, asking me for more. I don’t have time and -and -” You dig your face into his chest. Perhaps if you bury yourself in him it’ll all go away, you can hide just for a moment in the barrier he creates, right?
“Is there something I can do?”
“No -- I -- I don’t know -- no.” You shook your head violently and stumble out the words. A blubbering, stuttering mess they are but they make it through.
“It’s alright, I’m here. Try to breathe.”
“I - I can’t --”
“Yes you can.” He holds you tighter, holds you closer until the trembling eases and you can feel how deeply he breaths. They are slow, steady breaths and you let their rise and fall push away the waves that overwhelm you. It’s slow, painful, and you slip back under more than you’d like to admit but it helps. He helps. “There you go.” He whispers against your hair, a hand rubbing up and down your back in a steady pace.
“I’m sorry.” You admit, embarrassed and filled with shame even though you know it’s silly. You’ve heard it before: everyone is different, everyone has different limits but sometimes you wish yours was stronger.
“For what?”
“For this - I - I’ll be alright.” Sniffling, you pushed away from him but he held you still, hands moving to brush your cheeks and push back your hair. You let out another breath and eased into his touch.
“Let’s take a rest.”
“I don-” His thumb brushes across your lips, fingers pushing against your jaw and the actions cut you off completely. The way he looks at you shows he’s not taking ‘no’ for an answer. Easily, he ushers you to the nearest, comfiest couch he can and once your seated he wraps his arm around you and lets your head rest on his shoulder, snuggled right under his chin.
“That’s better.” He hums and you have to admit he’s right. “Offering you my support is what I know best, but if you really don’t need me -”
“It’s not that I don’t need you.” You explain, fingers pulling at the accessory around his thigh. “I - um - I don’t want to burden you.”
“We are a partnership, we share the weight. It burdens me more when you don’t rely on me.” You felt a soft kiss against you head, letting out a sigh you heard him continue. “Though I know how ... difficult it is to ask for assistance so I won’t pressure you.”
“Just ... give me a bit of time, okay?”
Another kiss on the top of your head made your eyes close and you took in a slow, body relaxing breath. “I’ll be here when you’re ready.” He reassured you, hand scooping up yours as easily as the sun rises.
Diluc keeps his word no matter what and he, as he said, waited until you were ready - even when your ‘ready’ was hours, days, weeks later - he was there when you called for him.
prompt: diluc wishes to procrastinate his paperwork. his method of choice? you. (also known as the fic where you make out with diluc)
pairing: diluc x f!reader
word count: ~1.6k
warnings: diluc & the reader are married, this fic has very intimate kissing details but nothing that isn't sfw! however, for my own comfort, please be 16 years of age or older when reading this fic c:
a/n: this is purely self indulgent hence the f!reader pronouns. ty for understanding ;;; i dont really write physical stuff like this so i hope u enjoy & let me know if u like it ? i spent a few days on this & i even bothered my gf about it LMFAO. new year = new writing challenges ?
it isn't often that the two of you are cooped up in dawn winery with nowhere else to go. diluc, being the ever-popular wine tycoon that he is, often spends his evenings fraternizing with potential clients and spends his nights protecting the streets of mondstadt. you, an adventurer at your core, are often whisked away on commissions that leave your side of the dawn winery master bedroom bed empty for days at a time. as soon as the wintry weather of mondstadt comes to its peak, with snow coating the ground and trade grinding to a near-temporary halt, commissions become unsafe and socialite parties dwindle.
this means that you and diluc have approximately a fortnight of nothing to do besides winery paperwork and mundane activities. you have chosen to read a book in diluc's study, curling up next to the fireplace while he sits at his desk, reading and signing away at some financial documents.
"darling," diluc calls for you. you perk your head up, looking over at him questioning.
"yeah?" you ask, twirling your bookmark in your hand.
"could you come over here?" he asks, voice a bit stiff. you nod and place your bookmark in the book before setting it to the side, eagerly bouncing over to your boyfriend.
"what's up, lulu?" you ask, looking over his shoulder at the documents before him. nothing about them seem relevant to you. noticing that you're scanning over the words on the page before him, diluc uses the opportunity to take one of your hands in his own, causing your attention to disrupt and your eyes to narrow.
a faint blush appears on diluc's cheeks as he looks up at you while his fingers absentmindedly play with your own. you now realize exactly why he called you over here, especially with the way his rubied gaze keeps flickering down to peer at your lips.
"don't you have work to do, ragnvindr?" you tease, giving his hand a squeeze. his thumb begins to trace absentminded patterns on the back of your hand and a small smile appears on his face.
"'ragnvindr', hm?" he muses. "do you not wish to return the favor of sweet nicknames?"
he swivels his desk chair to face you before gently tugging you closer. you oblige, moving to stand in front of him as he looks up at you fondly. you look at him with a sly smirk.
"well, you've never been the fondest of 'lulu'..." you say with an exaggerated sigh. diluc's deadpan expression gives you no indication that he disagrees, so you continue. "plus, when you have so much work to do, i can't help but keep our relationship strictly... formal."
"is that so, love?" diluc says. "i suppose i cannot resist the affectionate nicknames for you, then. even when my attention should be focused solely on business, my thoughts are wholly consumed by ones of you."
to seal the honesty of his words, he lifts your hand up to his lips and presses a soft kiss to your knuckles, looking up at you with utmost adoration as he does so. diluc doesn't fail to notice the way your breath hitches at the action. his smirk widens ever so slightly and he turns the inside of your wrist to face him.
"ever the charmer, huh, diluc? if only the other girls at the tavern could hear you now," you giggle. your gentle, amused laughter cuts short as diluc brings your wrist to his lips, gracing your pulse point with a chaste kiss.
"you are the only woman i could ever tell such words to," diluc says. "after all, such words are only truthful when i speak them to you and no one else."
you wonder if diluc felt the way your heartbeat quickened upon the impact of his mouth against your wrist. after all of these years spent together, diluc knows you far too well, yet looks up at you with innocent wonder all the same, even if his actions are anything but naïve. years spent together have only taught diluc exactly how to lure you into getting what he desires. who are you to deny him such a simple wish that you are more than willing to provide?
"hmm, really? then how should i reward such honesty?" you lean in closer to diluc's face, smiling as you look down at him. his scarlet eyes bore into your own and you can feel his breath fan lightly over your face in the close proximity.
diluc's hand releases your arm and instead finds purchase on the curve of your jaw, fingers slanting upward into your hair as the edge of his palm rests underneath your jawbone. his thumb grazes your cheek, carefully brushing across the skin as if you were made of intricate, delicate glass. the cool metal of his wedding band nearly sends a shiver through you as it brushes your jawbone, its chill softened only by the pyro-infused, familiar warmth of his skin.
you wonder many things about diluc ragnvindr, but you have never wondered if he loves you or not. you know the answer to such questions by heart. his intimate touch conveys his innermost loving sentiments towards you, even if he may be too bashful in other moments to voice such affections. tonight is different. tonight, you see the mirth in his eyes that the birth of adulthood stole from him.
"a reward..." diluc stares into your eyes and, despite his intense gaze, you don't look away. he places his other hand on your hip, fingers splaying across the thin fabric of your night clothes. "spend the evening with me?"
diluc's plea sounds so innocent, yet his eyes bore into you with the same ferocity and warmth of the flames that he conjures in battle. deciding to play into his little game, you wrap your arms around his neck and grin devilishly at him. instinctively, his knees part to allow you to stand directly between his sitting legs.
"spend the night with you? how scandalous, diluc," you murmur, lips now only centimeters away from his own. diluc's eyes dilate as you finally look down at his own lips with the same longing glance that he's been giving your own since he called you over. "what would everyone think?"
in spite of your appalled words, you use the parting of diluc's legs to your advantage and sit down on his lap. you hear diluc inhale sharply and your mischievous expression only worsens.
"i did not ask for a night with you -- only an evening. however, i will gladly oblige you with both, darling," diluc says, voice hushed in the close proximity.
and with that, the phoenix swoops in for the kill.
heated lips ignore your own. diluc's hand on your jaw guides you to look away from him and afterwards, his lips come in contact with your jawline instead, placing a desire-filled trail of kisses down your jaw. the hand on your hip shifts positions as diluc wraps his arm around your waist, allowing him to hold you closer as he begins to descend down the length of your neck.
you grant him access, allowing diluc to litter your skin with open-mouthed kisses. if someone had told you years ago that your newly-proclaimed boyfriend, diluc ragnvindr, would find entertainment in kissing you anywhere his lips could reach, you would have laughed in their face. now, you only careen further into diluc's touch, stabilizing yourself in his lap by bunching up the fabric of his shirt in your hands.
when diluc begins to trail down past the sensitive skin of your neck to focus on the exposed sliver of your collarbone, you pull back with a whine of the nickname he proclaims to dislike so much (you know otherwise, considering its the only nickname to put a blush on his cheeks).
"lulu," you protest and diluc chuckles softly, unoffended by your refusal of his silent plea.
"as you wish, love," he says, fixing the collar of your silk pajama top that he disrupted.
before you can tease him for trying to go further than just kissing, diluc silences you by pushing his lips against your own. you melt into the kiss as his hand returns to cup your cheek. his fingers brush against your hair as he kisses you like a man starved. hopeless desperation is poured into his kiss and you feel nothing in your senses besides all that diluc ragnvindr is conveying to you in this moment.
when the two of you finally break to catch your breath, diluc's cheeks are flushed red as he flashes you a wide grin, one you so scarcely see. you are unable to hide your own lovestruck smile as you laugh at his enamored expression.
"are you-" you pause to catch another breath, only causing diluc's expression to grow smug at your apparent breathlessness from his actions. "are you done procrastinating yet, love?"
diluc's eyes widen at the soft nickname, but he regains his composure, shaking his head with a quiet laugh.
"with my beautiful wife in my arms?" diluc asks. "i do not believe that i will ever be able to return to such mundane paperwork."
diluc ragnvindr descends upon your lips once more and you are all too willing to let yourself burn in the passionate flames of his affections.
premise: your diligent efforts to uncover the identity of your secret admirer had ultimately amounted to nothing. in fact, your investigations only raised more questions — your companions' strange behaviors and shifty-eyed gazes hadn't completely escaped from your awareness, not to mention you've become... privy to some of their affections...
and what is the last thing you need while trying to search for one person who liked you? more people to like you, of course!
but that is exactly what you receive. (goddamn it all.)
includes: zhongli, kaeya, scaramouche, itto & the real secret admirer !
note: oh god i have done it. it's even longer than the other one but since this is the 10k celebration fic, it's only rightfully so! i hope you enjoy this... likes and reblogs are appreciated <33 please read the first part if you haven't already!
zhongli:
all things considered, zhongli is an unrelated figure to your personal issues, not particularly concerned with such trifling matters. you lived worlds apart, and he's generally preoccupied by his own studies anyway, too absorbed in his thesis to mind who has a crush on who and whatnot.
yet it seems as if fate is intent on pulling you two together whether you like it or not.
you belong in different majors, your lecture halls on opposite sides of campus, and he's an upperclassman. not to mention the upperclassman everyone looks up to, the senior equivalent of albedo. though he holds an air of benevolence and warmth, he's unapproachable in the way nobody would dare impose themselves in fear of bothering him with their presence.
professors only speak of his name in accordance with endless words of praise, and legend has it that any paper he proofreads is guaranteed to receive a high grade... not that anyone could confirm it, since nobody has been gifted that luxury.
except for you, of course, living the y/n life — you'd been slaving away on your assignments per usual at diluc's cafe when, in a moment of misfortune, zhongli had crashed into a waiter and spilled his coffee on your papers, soaking pale sheets in brown splatters and smudging the inked sentences you'd painstakingly written for the past hour.
if only your laptop hadn't run out of battery, you wouldn't have resorted to drafting with pen and paper. or you could have done your work in a later date instead of being productive for nothing. fuck.
witnessing your expression crumpled to disbelief and misery, zhongli apologized through offering his assistance in doing your assignment with you. and oh boy, he did it well. it was better than what you could've ever done, the insight he provided beyond profound. he was humble even as you showered him with compliments, still looking quite apologetic for the fiasco he caused.
and. right. it could've ended there. after that occasion, you would wave at him if you passed by each other at the hallways, but that's where the extent of your relationship ended, a pair of underclassman and upperclassman who'd known each other once.
but of course it's never that easy.
he pops up when you least expect it, running into you frequently even though the rumors articulated “you'd hardly get a glimpse of him since he's busy all the time” clearly. and he's acquainted with people you know well, just that you never paid attention to it; keqing seems to respect him a lot, so does xiao, ganyu perks up whenever he's brought up in conversations, and childe sticks to him when given the opportunity. perhaps it was only a matter of time that you begin a friendship with him as well...
but what's up with these horribly timed drama tropes you keep experiencing with him?!
bumping into him and dropping your books to the floor so he offers to walk you to the library, locked into a room when a professor asks you to collect materials for class with him and the door has a faulty knob, getting photographed by a student while you study in the same table and everyone assumes you're dating,,
you've been seeing far too much of him.
everyone's patience has been wearing thin. xiao tries his best to keep his annoyance at bay but fails. childe has resorted to bribing zhongli for free lunch to lead him away from you. albedo straight up drags you to the opposite direction whenever he spots zhongli within vicinity.
but it's like there's a force of nature compelling you to stick right back to him.
hosting events for college fests had never been your kind of thing, but attention follows you if you're acquainted with famous people, and keqing was unwilling to be an emcee if she didn't have a friend alongside her to act as a second host. of course, that meant everyone was deadset on dragging you with her.
you're not very keen on standing on a stage to face the whole school like a kid participating in a talent show, but you've never been good at saying “no” to your friends.
hence why you find yourself clutching on a microphone now, blinded by bright stage lights. you would much prefer if you were part of the audience. or if you were in ayaka's place instead, holding up cue cards behind the curtains.
there's some kind of beauty pageant going on, a popularity contest for the prettiest people in uni. votes are collected via online polls, and you're tasked to reveal the top 10. you don't doubt for a second your friends will all join you on stage eventually, and you've already asked ganyu to drag xiao up the platform if he tries to escape. sweeping off a piece of confetti by your shoulder, you flip open the folden paper in your hand and announce the winning names.
zhongli steps up as one of the candidates for first place and you faintly hear gasps of awe and high pitched squeals.
you nod at him in acknowledgement, and he returns the gesture in kind. you head on over to hand him a mic of his own, keqing busying herself by doing the same job for other contestants, and...
in your carelessness, distracted by fumbling with the paper in your hand to hide it back inside your pocket, you trip over an electrical cord.
you've been waiting the entire night for the time where you'll eventually embarrass yourself in front of a crowd. perhaps a voice crack in what's supposed to be a tense situation, a stutter in your words, falling off a stage even, but here it is, even more horrifying than what you could've imagined.
squeezing your eyes shut instinctively, you brace yourself for the hard surface to tumble onto. instead, what meets you is something squishy, someone's hands gripping around your shoulders, and-
FUCK. you banged your knees on the ground.
the first thing to pop in your mind is a myriad of swears that could stun a sailor.
the second is the oddly plush surface your lips had landed on.
the third is the sight of widened golden eyes. they look very familiar. but you'd rather not think about who they belong to.
the ugly screech of the microphone dropping to the floor is drowned out by gasps, yelling, and the scandalized choke of keqing behind you. xiao — who did end up being a contender for the stupid popularity contest and is standing only a few meters away, makes an alarming noise that could trigger a person's fight or flight reaction.
you hastily attempt to rise to your feet, but the floor is slippery what the actual fuck, and zhongli, oh for fuck's sake, innocent and oblivious zhongli grabs your hips to keep you steady.
.....of course the accidental kiss and caught in a compromising position tropes were going to happen eventually.
kaeya:
“it's from me.”
your gaze travels from the fresh, new bouquet of flowers emitting a sweet fragrance lying in your arms, and the face of the man currently standing before you, lips curled in what seems to be a supposedly reassuring smile.
“you mean... this and the carnations last time?”
his lips are still firmly quirking upwards, admirably patient in spite of reiterating the same phrase over and over again whenever probed with your repetitive questions.
still, he doesn't quite give off the impression of someone deeply infatuated.
and okay, not to be narcissistic, but you expected a secret admirer to... well, admire you more, yet this person looks as nonchalant as ever.
and he doesn't look like the type to profess love through subtle means. at all.
you'll be blunt. you've heard of kaeya. who hasn't? whether it be of mischief, or something more scandalous in nature, he's more or less always involved with trouble, gossip about him traveling fast. it may be an insane prank in the boys' dormitory or someone he bedded (who's supposedly out of everyone's league, yet fell for his charms so easily), you hear of his name quite often.
it's just that you didn't expect you'd associate yourself with him...
and if you have at least two brain cells to rub together, you can easily piece together the conclusion: this guy is definitely talking out of his ass.
nobody has ever heard of kaeya pining over someone so badly that he personally sent bouquets and other small gifts to appease them, admiring them from the shadows. it's so clearly not his style. if he likes someone, he'd flirt with them a bit and cleverly worm his way into their heart, and absolutely not give away presents expecting nothing in return.
but if he's not your secret admirer, then for what reason is he pretending like he is?
you want to seek the truth, and playing along for the meantime sounds like the best option. and this may draw out the real secret admirer, the sly part of you voices internally.
thinking it'll be rude to turn him down publicly (since of course he initiated this exchange in the middle of a crowd, and that only gives you more reason to doubt him), you decide to see how things go first.
if anything, this whole “wooing” business with kaeya seems like it's done out of spite. does he have a bone to pick with you? or he made one of those stupid “it'll only take a week for you to fall for me” bets with his friends? hopefully not, because that's terribly out of trend.
your indifferent responses do nothing to deter him from sticking to you like glue though, doing this and that to earn your favor. he's... not doing anything wrong, actually. if you didn't know any better, you'd think he's like any other eager guy who wants to receive your love.
he does a great job of remembering what things you like and dislike, making a habit of inviting you out for a meal in your favorite restaurants every now and then or taking note of what movies you're looking forward to so you could watch it in the cinema together.
... it feels more like hanging out with normal friends now.
kaeya eases into the idea of that notion, too, insisting on meeting you outside of his shady “i'm your secret admirer” business. it doesn't take too long until you begin to reach out to him as well, inviting him to go shopping with you to look at jewelry together (and dear lord, does kaeya know how to accessorize) or giving him a ticket to the amusement park when kokomi bails on you. (“so i' m just a rebound? a back-up plan?” kaeya arches a questioning brow, acting deeply hurt to provoke a reaction. you smack his shoulder and he laughs in mirth.)
(he definitely tries for the “let's go to the haunted house so you can cling to me when you're scared” cliche but fails. why does he feel disappointed though...)
if given more time, maybe the time would come where you'll both just shrug off the secret admirer thing and continue on normally as friends. it'll be the last thing on your minds, a joke that never had a punchline. just some prank kaeya didn't see through the end.
but then it resurfaces when kaeya had already given you your daily dose of coffee — yes, he somehow knows the secret recipe you like, something you plan to ask him about later — but another cup is waiting at your desk, its once warm temperature turning lukewarm.
you inspect it, judging for yourself, and you confirm it's the same recipe you like.
so this one is from the real secret admirer then, the one who's still hiding in the shadows. that, or this recipe is just popular.
the people residing in the same room as you observe the scene with interest, because apparently your romance drama became a spectator sport, stares pinned in kaeya's direction.
you knew he was a fraud from the very start, but others do not, and he's not sure what to say.
someone else makes the excuse for him. “do you have another person who likes you, [name]?” amber asks innocently, essentially saving kaeya's ass without her realizing it. you let your gaze shift from her to kaeya.
“...maybe.” you place the two cups of coffee side-by-side, feigning nonchalance.
if the real secret admirer found out that someone's pretending to be him, this must be his way of saying kaeya's a fraud in front of everyone. after all, if he was actually the secret admirer, there'd be no need for kaeya to give you another cup when he'd already placed one on top of your desk.
and a couple of people already know who the real one is, anyway. xiao just doesn't want to tell you.
kaeya sends what seems to be a longing gaze your way but ends up turning away to head to his own classroom. he'd only offered to walk you towards yours, and you didn't share classes. it gives you more time to ponder how to confront him.
you didn't have to. he explained things himself.
it comes in the time you least expect, a peaceful lunch like any other. he suddenly arrived at your table, tray in hand, and sat opposite of you. “it's not me,” is the first thing he says, no context at all. he admits the obvious truth and you shovel more food in your mouth in your hopes of hiding how curious you are for what else he has to say.
“but i know who's been giving you flowers... and the coffee. also the chocolate the other day. i helped him pick out the presents, actually.” and that's where you choke because that's not what you were expecting at all.
“he was considering sending a love letter, but i told him you'd recognize his handwriting because you know him very well. and he refused to give a printed letter because he thought it was 'lacking' and you deserved better than that.” he scoffed at the thought. “and that's cute of him. endearing, if you will. but he seriously pissed me off last month and i wanted to mess with him a bit.”
“so you... tried to date the person he likes?” your expression sours. that's a dick move. he immediately shakes his head, as if to say perish the thought.
“not that. i knew for a fact you wouldn't like me anyway. i was just teasing him,” kaeya huffs. “and he got angry at me. well, it's a justified reaction. but i didn't plan on keeping up the charade for long. i only wanted to fool around for a few days.”
“and then?”
“...i missed the timing to pass it off as a joke. then we started to hang out like friends. but i assured him that you didn't actually think i was the real secret admirer, so he forgave me as long as i... do some work for him.”
oh. he's right about that though. and that also explains why kaeya looked so tired recently, helping out a friend with his project as a sincere apology.
“does he plan on revealing his identity anytime soon?” you can't help but ask, your eager eyes betraying the nonchalance in your voice. kaeya sighs at that, leaning back on his chair and crossing his arms.
“i've been trying to convince him to. it's exhausting to look at him flailing about like an idiot. he talks about you all the time.” he frowns at the way your cheeks color. “you should try luring him out.”
you tilt your head in question. to show his point, he reaches out his arm, grabbing your hand. you let him do as he pleases, even as he brings the spoonful of your meal to his lips, and takes a bite out of it.
distantly, you hear a metal clatter against the floor and a voice cry out in surprise. you turn your head towards the noise, and you see—
the hell. it's just bennett tripping.
... but it's not like bennett dropped a metal utensil or anything. he is the one who cried out, though.
“wrong direction, sweetheart. you were supposed to look at the right. what a shame, you didn't see him picking up his fork like a fool.” kaeya laughs, releasing your hand from his grip.
he seems strangely reluctant in doing so, but you decide not to look further into it.
scaramouche:
at best, he is an unwilling spectator.
emphasis on “unwilling” because he truly does not wish to see you. like at all. you're pretty sure he hates your guts, but he'd amassed a lifetime's worth of misfortune and keeps seeing you... and the guys around you.
it's safe to say if your love life was turned into a k-drama, he'd probably seen the entire series.
he'd walked in on you when childe confessed he likes you, purple eyes narrowed into a sharp glare before he turned on his heel and left the room. he'd seen the way xiao looks at you, starstruck and excruciatingly fond, because of course scaramouche sat beside him in class (long, long ago they settled a mutual agreement to not speak to each other unless necessary, even if they hadn't verbally discussed it). he'd seen you at diluc's cafe, too, when diluc poured coffee at the angry customer. scaramouche's clothes were stained, as he was the customer sitting beside your table.
he'd seen you with kazuha when kazuha came to pick you up in the rain. he'd seen albedo draw sketches of you in the corner of his notes. he'd seen thoma with you while out for grocery shopping. he'd seen gorou follow after you not unlike a loyal puppy.
he's, reasonably, tired of seeing your stupid face and your stupid harem and he hates you.
by the looks of it, none of your friends like him. especially mona. she had a few arguments with him already. they didn't mix well, and scaramouche liked poking fun of the astrology she loved, a firm disbeliever of such things. “how is my birthday supposed to dictate my personality? or my relationship status? is this fortune-telling? tell me, then. what's my lucky color for the day-” and he only shut up when mona landed a clean kick to his shin.
...yeah. he's kind of an asshole. the type to scowl 24/7, glare at you for no reason, and bump into you without apologizing. then when you do try to make small talk to alleviate the awkward atmosphere, he scoffs and pointedly ignores you.
but you can't blame him for finding you and... the guys following you irritating. you imagine it must be an eyesore for outsiders. there's already quite a bit of rumors about you going around seducing men (and women, you add, because apparently you can't be friends with pretty girls without having those kinds of intentions... and yoimiya and ayaka could be somewhat touchy) and rumors are almost always wildly changed with each pass of gossip from one person to another.
of course your friends don't believe it one bit and are ready 24/7 to defend your honor, but scaramouche is very obviously not your friend, and he may regard you with something less than pleasing.
it's only understandable you're caught by surprise when you chance upon him picking a fight with people badmouthing you, shoving a boy to the wall with brute force you wouldn't expect from someone his size. (you berate yourself for making fun of his height in this kind of situation.)
“shut the fuck up,” scaramouche drawls out, fisting the boy's shirt collar. “your voice is grating to the ears. surely, you have better things to do than yap nonsensical bullshit out in the open?”
“what's your fucking problem?!” the guy responds, panicking within his grip. “it's not like we were talking about you! don't think so highly of yourself!”
that prompts a scoff from him, and he tightens his hold on the boy's collar. he immediately shuts his mouth, thinking it better not to retaliate. scaramouche's glare promises something beyond simple violence if he continued to act prideful.
somwhat satisfied by the fear glistening in the guy's eyes, scaramouche finally releases him. “scram.”
the group runs off, and you quickly duck behind a wall to hide from his sight as he walks away. you're not sure what to feel, conflicted by his usual prick demeanor and shockingly kind(?) actions behind the scenes.
unfortunately, your confusion reflects directly on your face. after a handful of times catching you staring at him, he finally snaps, “what do you want.”
your expression twists into something complex, and scaramouche's frown deepens. “uh... no, it's nothing, really...”
“you've been looking at me all day. do you take me for a fool?”
your face sours. so much for planning to thank him. maybe he didn't stand up for you and actually just found the noisy gossiping annoying enough to choke a guy and pin him to the wall. if it's scaramouche, it isn't too far-fetched at all.
and what were you going to say to him, anyway? it's not like he explicitly stated he did it for you. it would be beyond mortifying if you thanked him for it and he clarified that little detail, thinking you were stuck-up enough to assume the world revolves around you.
... no, that's too much overthinking, isn't it...
“well?” scaramouche impatiently taps his foot, raising an eyebrow expectantly. you hold back a defeated sigh and decide to stay put.
“sorry if i made you uncomfortable. i was, um, looking at...” who does he sit with again? “xiao!” you mentally apologize to your friend, using his name as an excuse.
impossibly, he becomes more irate than before, his taps ceasing into a calm quiet. the silence pierces more than the tense conversation prior.
without another word, he walks away.
...well. okay. that was safely evaded.
life continues on per usual. you don't interact for the next week, and you want to leave it at that.
except your life is a joke. a romantic comedy you never wanted to be a part of.
...you're assigned to a group project. with him. with childe too, no less. the childe who confessed his love to you not too long ago and you still have problems wrapping your head around it, not sure how to talk with him like you did before.
amidst this drama, scaramouche is stuck smack dab between you. he's unquestionably furious.
he's present when childe looks at you in the same excruciating way xiao does. he's present when childe tries to make jokes to ease off the tension, and it doesn't work in the slightest. he's present in the lingering gazes, awkward pauses when you graze fingers as you hand materials to each other, and reluctant conversations that never last any longer than seven clipped sentences.
scaramouche feels wronged. had he committed a war crime in his past life to deserve this despair?
and you. you just want to get this over with. collect information, make a powerpoint, and present in front of the whole class. easier said than done.
the three of you together doesn't sit right with you, but left with only two isn't any better either. childe and scaramouche don't get along if you leave them long enough for an argument to brew. scaramouche hates you and doesn't fill the silence when childe leaves for a bathroom break. childe tries too hard to talk when scaramouche leaves for a coffee break.
when the first day of working together ends, you nearly cry tears of joy.
“i can walk you home,” childe offers out of goodwill. it's certainly not because he has other intentions in mind, he's just concerned since it is pretty late.
“we take the same bus,” scaramouche speaks, for the first time joining your conversation. “we can go together.”
childe smiles in relief, lifting a hand to ruffle your hair. then he stills. old habits die hard. damn.
for his sake, you don't comment on it. you walk out of the library, scaramouche in tow.
the stroll to the empty bus stop isn't a comfortable one, but at the very least, you're accompanied by an acquaintance and you don't have to feel anxious being alone. you take a seat as you wait but scaramouche chooses to remain standing, placing a fair amount of distance between you.
“...you haven't made up?”
his voice is small, almost swallowed by the howling winds. you're surprised he wants to talk about it, but you laugh. “we didn't fight or anything.”
“fighting would've been better,” he replies. “an apology could still repair your relationship. but there's nothing you can do if you don't see him that way, and he can't see you as a friend.”
you look down at your feet, heels resting firmly against the pavement. “yes... it's tricky. i don't know how to act around him. i don't want to hurt him, but... maybe not rejecting him is painful, too.”
“then turn him down properly.”
“it's not that easy...”
“would you rather him still have hopes for a chance with you and eventually get disappointed instead of dealing with it once and for all?”
he makes an excellent point. it's reasonable enough... but you don't know how to bring it up with childe. not now. not yet. you'll have to think about it properly, the way to reject him with the least amount of discomfort from his side.
“receiving relationship advice from you... if someone told me this would happen today, i'd think they've gone mad.” you chuckle. “do you deal with friends whining about hardships like these often?”
“apparently, they think of me — someone who has no interest in dating — as the perfect person to consult for relationship problems.”
“hm? you don't date? do you like anyone, at least?”
he gives you a look. it's perfectly blank, devoid of his usual arrogance or irritation. you blink at him, the pause in the conversation stretching too long to be comfortable.
“you could say that. but i don't... try things i know won't work out.”
“...like?”
he rolls his eyes. “think about it this way.” he removes his hands from his pockets, approaching your seated figure. he comes startlingly close, mere centimeters away, and his fingers curl around your wrist. your lips part and close, and you wonder if he's trying to kiss your knuckles-
“if i told you now that i like you, with this many people who like you too, there's no way i'd win, is there?”
it's an example, you tell yourself. you asked him a question and he answered it.
“...so the one you like is popular...”
but his gaze looking directly into your eyes is too earnest, too honest. sincere. light reflects against the violet pools, a turbulent storm clouding within.
you neither nod nor shake your head. the bus arrives and you scramble to get on it.
scaramouche pulls you by the wrist when you nearly trip over the small set of stairs, leading you to a pair of seats. if you have something to be grateful for, it's that he doesn't try to talk anymore, using the pair of headphones resting by his neck for the rest of the ride.
itto:
itto barges into your life in a whirlwind of chaos.
it comes in the form of a stray volleyball plummeting towards your back, and the sheer force behind it knocks the wind out of your lungs. your knees buckle and you kneel on the floor, heaving violent gasps of air. the searing pain makes you wonder if you broke your spine.
distantly, a screech bellows from the court. a figure almost flies past the gymnasium's doors to check on your condition. “are you okay?!” it's gorou, you realize, his eyes blown wide with panic.
you don't want to worry him and say you feel as if you've permanently shattered a bone, but your back hurts like a bitch and you tell him so, “fuck me with a hammer, did a bowling ball crash into me or something?”
he ignores your interesting choice of words and answers, “my friends and i were playing volleyball, i'm so sorry! we didn't see you there at all!”
you steer your sight to the gymnasium entrance and oh my god. the doors aren't especially massive, and one of them is even closed, so what are the chances you walk past the small space and precisely get slammed by a stray ball? it's gotta be lower than a five star drop in gacha.
“can you stand?” gorou holds up a hand for you to take but you really can't move away from your fetal position without an explosion of ache jolting through your body. he's three seconds away from offering to carry you when someone else beats him to it.
“did you get hurt?!” a blur of white hair passes through your eyes, and you blink up at an unfamiliar man. gorou's friend, you're guessing, most likely the one who injured you too — that powerful force from the volleyball could only come from someone like him. tall, athletic, muscular. he's ripped. shredded. probably tore your muscle fibers too.
you don't let the pain cloud your mind. he didn't mean to kill you, you remind yourself. you stretch your lips into a smile, but it may just look like a grimace.
however, with a gentleness you didn't expect from him, he carefully hoists you on his back. oh. he's strong. and really warm.
...sticky with sweat too, but you'll try not to mind it too much...
“i'll carry you to the infirmary!”
your brain clears up from the haze of agony. “...wait, you don't have to-” before you get another word in, he rushes to the clinic, and you bypass many, many people. you settle for hiding your face as best as you can.
after proper treatment, he gives you a serious apology. you learn his name is itto, and you instantly recognize him. you've heard of the name itto before, that one popular student on a sports scholarship for basketball, but he's known more for goofing off with other sports teams. he's broken a lot of windows when he played baseball... and probably also broke bones of other people when he roughhoused too much on the soccer field. it's just that he's insanely talented, enough for most people to overlook his troublesome tendencies.
anyhow, famous or infamous, you can't tell yet. but he's very much willing to make up for your injury.
a free meal would honestly suffice just fine, but even after that, he insists on following you around, offering his assistance whenever needed. and, well. you have no problems with having an extra hand to help when you need to carry heavy equipment.
then he learns about the whole secret admirer thing and he proposes he'll help you lure him out.
“and how do you intend to do that...?” you inquire just as you enter the lecture hall, itto trailing after you and setting your bag on the table. his face splits into a grin and you have a vague idea of what he plans on doing.
he wraps an arm around your shoulders and tugs you close to his chest.
several things happen at once. a huff leaves xiao's mouth involuntarily. the crack of pencil lead breaking into pieces sounds from beside him, scaramouche holding the pen in his hand with too much force. the laughter ringing seconds prior comes to a halt, childe's face no longer displaying a bright smile.
itto blinks, retracting his arm. he didn't expect this outcome. “you have really overprotective friends, [name].”
as one would expect, you never got the results you want because too much people react to his provocations. it's tricky to pinpoint which one of them exactly is your secret admirer when they all like you the same. (this whole situation is truly absurd. it's not that you fed all these guys love potions by accident, right?)
itto doesn't dare upsetting gorou with this though, but with anyone else, it's free game. he begins calling you the most ridiculous pet names he could come up with, in the wrong place and in the wrong time.
my precious cupcake. my sweetest honeybun. little ducky. snugglepuff. they send shivers down your spine. (albedo is noted to be most affected when itto does this. it's not hard to imagine his brain cells frying when itto shamelessly calls you by such awful names.)
but then it becomes a habit. he's not doing it ironically anymore. his mouth had become accustomed to addressing you in manners only lovers do. more often than not, your friends would be caught by surprise when he wholeheartedly calls out “babe” to earn your attention and you turn towards him as if it's like the most natural thing in the world.
the cherry on top is when you attend one of his games for the basketball team.
it's not like you wore his varsity jacket to rub into everyone's faces the fact that you're dating. nor did you wear a cheerleader outfit of some sorts to show your passionate support as his significant other. you'd only come with gorou and kokomi, waving the banner the three of you made into the air as you were seated in the stands along the sides of the court.
when they won the finals, people on your side all rejoiced, flocking over to the team to praise them and offer their congratulations. thinking it would be better to stand by instead of joining the sweaty crowd, you stood aside with kokomi while gorou insisted on diving headfirst to the sea of people.
then a tall head approaches from afar. white hair, bright eyes, and a similarly blinding smile. “[name]!”
you didn't expect him to come to you. well. spares you the effort then. you throw a towel around his neck. “you're drenched in sweat. please don't touch me.”
he frowns. “not even a congratulatory hug?”
“not when you're this gross.”
at least that wasn't a stern no. itto grins. “wasn't i great out there?” he cards his fingers into his hair, fishing for compliments. you thought he had enough of those from the crowd currently swarming him. “i did a ton of 3 pointers. you saw me, right?”
“would you be disappointed if i said i was on my phone the whole time?”
immediately, his face twists into an offended look. of course that was a lie. you laugh and lean on the tips of your toes to reach his hair, ruffling it into a mess. “kidding. you were amazing, babe.”
that moment, you hadn't seen his expression clearly, occupied with patting his head. perhaps you hadn't even realized what you called him.
but to everyone around you, they could see it, plain to the eye — the shock in his gaze, the small twitch of his lips, the rise of his brows. then his cheeks flush a lovely color as he stares at you under his lashes with a hesitance as one would look at the sun, longing to admire its radiance yet afraid to be scorched by its brilliant rays.
he takes the leap anyways, staring at you as long as he wanted.
a lovestruck fool, keen to your touch.
your secret admirer.
relatively speaking, it's an ordinary day so far.
or as ordinary as it can be with a life as silly as yours. the past few weeks didn't feel real. you wish they weren't. everything has become too complicated. everyone kept on acting suspiciously and skirting around you, avoiding eye contact only to observe you from behind.
your day starts out seeing thoma when you open your front door, both of you telling each other good morning. you pass by kazuha having breakfast at a fast food joint. then you run into itto first thing in the morning, where he gladly helps in carrying a 3d model of your project into class. kaeya swings by to bring you coffee since you didn't get a chance to visit diluc's cafe, not having the extra hand to carry among the pile you already have. you make your daily greetings, saying hi to your friends and annoying xiao, as you always do. you nod towards scaramouche, and you even had enough courage to say hi first to childe too. when walking to another lecture hall, you happen to meet albedo, gorou and zhongli in separate times.
then at lunch time, when you briefly leave your belongings alone for a moment, someone leaves a packet of candies stuffed into your bag.
a sticky note is stuck on the surface, “please meet me at the physics classroom at 6 p.m.” scrawled in black ink.
the penmanship is good. it twists in elegant curls at the edges, brush strokes light and even.
you're able to recognize it at first glance, just as kaeya has told you.
you've seen it enough times to burn it in your brain. you've rigorously studied notes with that same handwriting, after all.
at 5:56, you stand in front of the classroom doors. in different circumstances, you'd have second thoughts before blindly following somebody's orders but you know who it's from, and it is decidedly not a murderer out to get you.
you collect an intake of breath, and twist the doorknob.
the last traces of sunlight bathe the room in a heavenly glow, a haze of aureate like shimmering flecks of gold. the billowing curtains hide the figure standing by the windowsill, the gentle breeze caressing your cheeks as you squint in its direction.
the figure moves of their accord, the sound of a book snapping shut following their actions.
albedo walks out, a serene smile displaying on his sun-kissed face.
“...hey.”
your heartbeat pounds in your ears. though you expected his appearance, it does nothing to dull your surprise.
“it's you.”
albedo had always admired you in quiet adoration.
he can't provide a clear explanation why his gaze is naturally drawn to you, turquoise eyes sweeping by your countenance before he realizes it. but it started out simple, as everything does: a curiosity piqued, when he heard of a person tagging along the supposedly unapproachable girls in school.
gossip comes and goes every season, and albedo knew it will pass soon. it's only a matter of time before they cling to another topic to babble about. most likely something kaeya did again, because he chases after trouble like a dog with a bone.
rumors are nasty. they paint you in malicious light, a person seeking attention among the most eye-catching lot. you wished you were on the same league as them, they said. you were only after the benefits of acquainting with those girls, they said.
but you were special on your own.
the way you carried yourself with confidence, against the judgmental stares and muddled opinions. the way you hadn't cared about what other people said, because you knew best about the situation and you were different from what they made you out to be. the way you genuinely loved your friends, sincerely wishing them happiness and doing everything you can to put a smile on their faces.
you were dazzling.
your laughter rang like bells in his ears, your grin a delight to see. your voice was melodious as you prattled on about the latest film you watched, or as you hummed a song with headphones covering your ears. your colorful expressions were amusing, a reflection of the feelings in your heart.
as the professor drones out during lessons, albedo finds himself distracted by his daydreams. what if he stood beside you? what if he could partake in conversations, not only able to hear your voice but you'd also hear his? what if he was the one faced with your smile, the reason of your smile, the one who made you feel such joy?
what if you permitted him to go further? to brush hands with you, to intertwine your fingers in simple intimacy, to curl his arms around your waist in a loose embrace, to press a kiss on the corner of your lips-
his ears burned in humiliation. what on earth was he thinking?
but forget “seeking attention from others,” it didn't even seem like you were interested in dating.
you showed indifference towards the idea, avoiding mixers and drinking parties. you also turned down quite a few dates. not to mention albedo wasn't even friends with you. he wasn't even sure if you knew of his name.
then you showed up at the library, and for the first time, albedo was thankful for the privilege nobody bothered his table, so you could sit alone together.
you became friends after his (despairingly embarrassing) insistent attempts to acquaint himself with you.
and he files away the little details, storing the small things about you in the corner of his mind. what you like, what you dislike. what days were you free, what things you prefer over the other.
it's a happiness he relishes in, the comfort of your friendship. but his greedy little heart yearns for more, for what you cannot give.
he tries anyway.
he's running out of time. you're always surrounded by people, whether you realize it or not. but he considers himself a selfish person. he doesn't want you to be taken away.
he may lose you entirely if he does it wrong.
but you're already here, eyes gleaming, lips pressed in a nervous tight line. the red dusting your cheeks leaves some hope for him, so he musters up his courage and simplifies the storm of feelings that eats away his heart each day:
premise: as a friend of the most attractive students in school, you're more than used to acting as the middleman between them and the people vying for their affection, often tasked with delivering presents or handing out their love letters. however, when you chance upon a small bouquet of flowers on your desk without a note indicating the sender or who you're meant to give it to, you start to wonder if this one's supposed to be yours.
a/n: hahaha why is this so long... anyways this is a college au + reverse harem of some sorts. enjoy. i really don't want this one to flop so likes and reblogs are appreciated thx
“Do you think it's a prank?”
“Why is that the first thing that pops into your mind?” Keqing sighs as she fixes her makeup in front of a compact mirror, smacking her lips to spread the color evenly. “You're really cute, [Name]. why wouldn't someone like you by now?”
Your face burns at the offhand comment. “You're only saying that because we're friends.”
Ayaka giggles, twirling a lock of your hair with her finger. “Of course not. You're very adorable! If anything, it'd be more surprising if nobody likes you.”
“Who do you think it's from, though?” Ganyu quietly asks from beside you, observing the handful of carnations laying on your desk. Scanning the students currently present in the room, she thoughtfully adds, “maybe someone on the shyer side since they couldn't give it to you directly?”
“Or someone who did it to be romantic,” Kokomi suggests, scrutinizing the flowers with keen eyes. “That's quite nice of them.”
You hummed in contemplation, trying to figure out who placed it on your table. “Are you sure it's not a prank... or a mistake? You all sit beside me, so maybe they mistook my seat for yours-”
“You're the only one who faithfully sits there, [Name]. We don't even have assigned seats so most of us sits wherever,” Keqing clarifies, staring at you with a disapproving look. “Don't deny it. You know it's yours.”
“But I can't think of anyone who would like me!” you exclaim in defeat. “I am curious about who gave it, though... I should try to find out who it is...”
“More importantly...” Ganyu smiles at you, noticing the blush dusting your cheeks. “Who do you want it to be?”
childe:
in all honesty, he's your first guess.
not because you think he likes you or anything! he's just a huge flirt.
at the beginning of the school year, you hardly got along. you know he's a friendly guy, but it's in the way that... intimidated you. he's part of the “mood maker” clique, attracting attention wherever he goes, and you're not sure if you could handle his energy...
you preferred to stay away from the spotlight though that's a bit hypocritical considering you're friends with the prettiest group of girls in your year, and he relished in it. you didn't know if you could get along.
you didn't become friends until you were assigned partners for a project that meant a lot for your grade, and you vowed to yourself if you couldn't be close to him, you should at least be close enough to work together without trouble.
in the end, you surprisingly hit it off, childe easing the awkward air between you with jokes and random stories to tell about his weird friends. your friendship didn't end when the project did, and you continued to hang out outside of school. you're sure he didn't approach you to get closer to your friends, either; though you had some doubts at first, he was nothing alike with the jerks who tried to use you.
you're no stranger to the pranks he pulled, nor were you unaware of his flirty nature; he occasionally entertained the lot who fancied him when he attended drinking parties. so it made perfect sense if it was childe who gave those flowers, along with the gifts that followed after. it would just be him messing around again, right? oh, definitely! it wouldn't be the first time he spent his money in reckless abandon, bragging that he has the cash to spare for it.
but unexpectedly when you bring up the topic, his expression darkens, showing no sign of joking around. he looks a little shocked, too, to know someone was pursuing you.
“it's not from me,” he admits, gently taking your hand. “but it's true that i like you.”
xiao:
xiao is one of the people you deliver presents to lol
due to his intimidating disposition (and the endless amount of nasty rumors swirling about him, thanks to said intimidating disposition), hardly anybody would dare to approach him, daunted by the perpetual scowl etched on his face. he remains as eye candy, but an entity no one could reach.
you avoided him at first, too. his face is admirable, you can say that much, but you've become somewhat desensitized from having been surrounded by pretty faces 24/7 so you can't really say it's anything new... and yes, you are scared of him to a certain degree. you could never guess what he's thinking.
you weren't sure if he's as scary as people make him out to be though, since people tend to exaggerate gossip for the sake of shock value. he once defended a middle schooler from high school delinquents (through persuasion and not with fists), but the story somehow twisted into another tale entirely detailing how xiao had brutally wiped the floor with their faces and painted the concrete floor with blood...
but as intimidating as he might seem, you don't think he's that kind of character. if you overlook his piercing glare and sharp tongue, he's quite decent.
... you thought that way until you caught him tailing you on your way home.
he crept up behind you, maintaining a natural distance, but after numerous twists and turns in hopes of leading him away, he had yet to cease heading towards your direction. you wouldn't be so suspicious if you hadn't purposely gone in circles around town, leading back to where you came from — which meant he didn't have a particular destination in mind, and fully intended on being hot on your tail.
tired of having bated breath waiting for his next move, you gathered all your courage and confronted him directly, cornering him to the nearest wall to assert dominance. xiao seemed startled by your forwardness, and you took his moment of vulnerability as an opportunity to interrogate him.
unexpectedly, he sheepishly confesses, “i'm not a stalker, i got worried since you're going home this late. haven't you heard about the crime rate these days...”
from there on, you suppose you could say you understood him better. though he's snappy and stern, he's not that terrifying, even sweet at times. when you become proper friends (and you stop suspecting him as your stalker), he saves you a seat next to him, or brings you coffee that you like when he notices you're sleepy in class.
it wasn't long until everybody came to know you were friends and a girl finally — you guessed it — asked you to send a love letter to xiao in her stead.
when you gave it to xiao, he was unusually flustered, flushed pink to the tips of his ears. his expression falls flat once you tell him it's from someone else, badly containing the disappointment to show on his face.
nevertheless, you continue to be friends, and xiao has learned not to expect much from you.
he's the earliest to arrive in class, so you ask him if he'd seen the person who gave you flowers. with a cold, hard look, he says no.
he's acting kind of weird, isn't he...
diluc:
the barista in the coffee shop near your university that has to put up with so much bullshit flirting everyday.
he has to reject people in a roundabout way, and you know he hates it, but of course he has to provide great customer service if he still wants customers right... directly breaking their hearts would only make problems.
but he takes no shit from rude customers.
no, you weren't one of them. in fact, diluc quite liked you a bit. first of all, you don't have any romantic interest for the staff, you genuinely enjoy his drinks (he knows because your face is like an open book), and you mind your own business. he tolerates you enough that he can make small talk with you and it doesn't upset him in the slightest.
so it really ticked him off when some idiot was bothering you in the cafe, starting an argument over a trivial matter that shouldn't be fussed over.
in normal circumstances, diluc would've done the usual protocol — reason with the angry customer, offer free products, and let them leave the premises peacefully. but the moment he saw the man grab your shoulders and you winced in pain as a result, he didn't even have to think of what to do next.
cold coffee rained down on the ill-mannered man's head, evoking a surprised scream out of him. his fingers left your body in favor of patting away the sticky liquid from his clothes, and you stared blankly at the seething figure behind him.
“your order,” diluc announced, his voice tinted with rage. then he pretended to remember something, looking at the empty cup in his hand. “oh, i apologize. you ordered it hot, didn't you?” he forced a smile on his face. “would you like me to brew another one for you?”
the man erupted to a new screaming fit, but he was promptly dragged aside. diluc immediately questioned if you were hurt anywhere, his voice a total 180 from before and turning into a soft tone you nearly didn't recognize.
“that stunt you pulled...” you nervously said. “will you be okay...? won't you get, er, dismissed because of it?”
“...you don't know i own this place?”
“???”
in any case, you've become good friends ever since that incident. so when your secret admirer gives you your customized drink from diluc's shop (that even xiao doesn't know the recipe of!), you ask him if there's a customer who ordered your exact drink that morning.
strangely enough, he changes the subject.
“he only gave you coffee?” diluc wrinkles his nose. “he's not fit for you.”
he proceeds to shove you a plate of pancakes for breakfast and won't let you talk about that topic again.
kazuha:
the soft-spoken boy working part-time as a florist. as one would expect, his good-looking features attracted customers left and right, just like how a flower allures bees with its colorful petals and sweet nectar.
he studies in a different university from you, but it's relatively close by and you run into each other a lot. you could say you're pretty good friends; you exchanged contact information and text every other day, phone each other up to have a meal together whenever you're both free, and hang out over the weekend.
he stirred up some drama with you once. on a rainy day, he invited you to eat lunch together, but you've forgotten to take an umbrella before leaving for school so you told him you'd be a little late 'cause you had to run to the convenience store first. however, he told you not to worry about it and abruptly ended the call.
fast forward to the afternoon: the glass doors to leave the corridors had a few people lurking by, covering what was beyond. you cocked up an eyebrow in question, confused over what was all the fuss, but then you see that familiar pale hair streaked with bright red.
kazuha stood innocently by the school gates, a crimson umbrella in hand, and a small bouquet in the other. he checked his wristwatch every few minutes, seeming to be waiting for someone. he completely ignored the gawking stares pinned on his frame, busying himself by humming a quiet tune.
you hesitantly pushed open the doors, approaching him with wary steps. he immediately perked up once noticing you, beaming brightly to greet you with enthusiasm. he offered you the bouquet, telling you it's nothing more than a small gift the owner had let him craft for free (who mistakenly thought kazuha had a lover, since he was always on his phone texting someone).
you might have known the reasons behind the present, but nobody else did. and what general implications could gifting a bouquet of flowers have?
thus, the school's online forum exploded with questions, asking for the identity of the pretty boy standing by their university, and the lucky person he'd given flowers to.
needless to say it was hard to convince your friends that no, he isn't your boyfriend.
but that was another issue! the issue NOW is the other bouquet you received, much more recent in nature. after suspecting childe, your next thought was to ask kazuha if he had any buyers who purchased the same flowers you had.
his lips twitch for a moment, faintly looking displeased. but he flashes a flawless, award-winning customer service smile, covering his initial expression easily.
“no such customer ordered for those flowers that day. but i am curious about this matter... could you humor me and explain more in detail, by any chance?”
albedo:
the med student fawned over by students and teachers alike. he's simply brilliant, idolized by the entire student body. though he's mainly studying science, he's been praised for his art as well, his paintings hung in the art room proudly.
you're not very familiar with him, only knowing him through hearsay. you don't know what he looks like, so you've never confirmed for yourself if he's as beautiful everyone says he is.
he's well-known but you haven't heard anything bad about him, which is an impressive feat. his name is only ever mentioned in concert with endless compliments.
you meet him by chance in exam season. unsurprisingly, the library is filled to the brim, tables stacked high with books and each chair occupied by agitated students sipping energy drinks and coffee to stay functional. amidst all the chaos, one student remains radiant and carefree, leisurely flicking pages through his notes. he's situated by a corner table, unbothered by the mindless zombies despite having plenty of free seats beside him and everyone else is squished together like canned tuna.
and you, carrying binders, books and stationery, are visibly desperate for a place to rest. his eyes leave the words in his notes briefly, beckoning you to come closer. and you, still unaware of his identity, gladly plop on a chair and heave your heavy supplies atop the table. it shakes for a moment as it bears the new weight, rattling his items, and the zombies gape at you in question. ironically, the person you've been bothering is not offended at all.
you sneak glances at him when you need to freshen your eyes from studying, nauseated by the letters that never seem to come to an end no matter how many paragraphs you've read. you're at awe by his fair skin, not a single blemish in sight, and he doesn't even have dark circles under his eyes. truly mysterious. either he has a magical skincare routine or he's not human. if anything, you'd think he just came from a relaxing vacation, not in the middle of hell week.
you snap out of your trance, and you scold yourself for being bewitched. you have more pressing concerns, and so you grill more information into your brain, oblivious to the turquoise eyes that begin to stare at you.
the next encounter comes when exams are finally over, and you celebrate by buying the pricey food set in the cafeteria. the crunch of golden breading is rewarding for your taste buds and you shovel more food towards your mouth, minding your own business.
the seat next to you is pulled back, and you pause from chewing. it's that guy again, his refined beauty easy for you to recognize. he places his tray on the table, smiling amiably as he asks if it's fine with you should he sit there. you nod, but there's plenty of vacant tables around. it's also pretty weird that he sat next to you, not across...
well, strange as it is, that's how you befriend albedo. you've yet to learn why he came on so strong, almost aggressive. like he really wanted to talk to you. but whatever.
the more you learn about him, the more his image of “golden boy” withers away. picture of elegance? the standard of sophistication? sure. but this guy doesn't hesitate to do the weirdest shit sometimes.
he doesn't fear anything. he puts anything edible in his mouth. one school trip to the countryside taught you a few things. if he's offered fried bugs, he'll eat it. if he's given frog legs, he'll eat it. he doesn't care. he'll eat seemingly anything. because of this, you worry his admirers will put something strange in the food they give him, but that possibility doesn't cross his mind at all. (well. not that he eats it. he rejects gifts most of the time. exceptions are when they come from you.)
you're starting to think he really doesn't fear anything. when you start to scream in fright like a headless chicken while watching a horror movie, he calmly studies the anatomy of whatever horrifying creature is on screen, questioning their ability to walk when half of their body is split apart. why is he questioning horror movie logic. “ghosts are supposed to be transparent and can pass through walls, how come she can grab the main character's hair and drag him to the incinerator?” “albedo, please.” (he comforts you when you get scared, hiding your face in his shoulder as he wraps his arms around you. he softly whispers in your ear to tell you when the scary parts are over.)
he's also an overprotective older brother. for good reason, actually. his little sister, albeit cute and outwardly harmless, is an explosive child who likes to make trouble. if he takes his eyes off her for more than two minutes, she will undoubtedly set fire to his little garden.
but aside from being a pain in the ass, his observation skills can help you — surely albedo can make a few guesses for your secret admirer's identity?
she's the reason why he's so observant. he can tell you trimmed your hair because he's all too used to klee chopping off her own hair with craft scissors. he also notices when you feel a bit under the weather. klee is the type to hide her sickness so she could play outside, and albedo would often have to forcibly tuck her back to bed. you're no different. he will, quite literally, drag you to your house and make you rest.
albedo blinks at you, uncharacteristically silent. he purses his lips, and gives you a small smile. he asks a few unassuming questions, things like what traces your secret left behind, or if they'd sent a love letter and he'd check the penmanship to see if he found it familiar.
he's not the most eager to help, you know that, but you're still slightly disappointed when he says, “sorry, i can't help you with something like that. it'd be better if you figured it out yourself.”
thoma:
the cute neighbor living in the apartment next door. just like kazuha, he studies in a different university, but you run into each other a lot because... well. obviously.
you find him rather silly. he'd signed the lease not knowing pets weren't allowed in the premises, and tearfully waved taroumaru goodbye when he moved in. to cope, he started staying at the park near the apartment building, playing with the dogs there and getting hit on by their owners in the process, but let's not talk about that.
despite being a newcomer, he fit right in with the tenants. he made effort to learn everyone's names and chatted with them whenever presented a chance, thus winning their favor. it isn't a strange sight to see him with middle-aged ladies and looking at home, listening earnestly to their complaints about their husbands or rowdy children. (his hard work pays off when they give him their special recipes and inform him of supermarket deals lol)
he seems to get along well with old men too, invited to their drinking parties. except thoma isn't good at rejecting alcohol from older adults, so when you save him from such situation — pulling him away from the old men prying into his love life, because surely a good kid like him would have someone to love him dearly — he's become eternally grateful.
he's honestly too good for his own good.
exhibit a: thoma is prone to cooking too much food for one person to eat in one sitting, so he tends to invite you to eat his hotpot with him or bring you packaged food you can easily pop into a microwave. after your one act of goodwill, he's become strangely attached to you, pronouncing you best buds. he then admits he used to live with a larger group of people (hence his cooking habits), and he's thankful for your company. (you'd argue you're getting the better end of the deal, receiving free food like this)
exhibit b: he's always available to help you in your troubles. need a hand with heavy groceries? he's on his way! ran out of soy sauce? just wait a bit, he's gonna grab some from the cupboard! forgot your key inside your apartment? then stay at his place for the meantime before the locksmith comes! your shower isn't working well?... he promises he won't peek in the bathroom, so feel free to take a bath h a h a h a. need someone's opinion on what outfit to wear for a date? sure, he's- wait.
YOU'RE GOING ON A DATE?
his face twists weirdly as you showcase two different shirts, asking which one he likes better. you raise an eyebrow when he doesn't dare to utter a single word. “are they both bad?”
he blinks rapidly, then shakes his head laughing. he half-heartedly points to the shirt in your left hand, but you can tell he doesn't really think much of it. he excuses himself fairly quickly, saying he had chores to do, and scurried back to his own home.
(you were only going to a date with ayaka's older brother because she insisted you both needed a love life, but it's not like you actually feel anything for him.)
it doesn't end there. thoma acts weird sometimes. he's strangely cold when he sees you inviting kazuha to your apartment to hang out. he also stiffens when he spots xiao walking you home.
but by far, he acted the weirdest when your phone number called him, but when he answered, he heard a different voice respond.
it's childe, whom you went drinking with. he doesn't know where you live, and you're not nearly sober enough to return home on your own, and it's not like you'll agree to staying over childe's house. you also refuse telling him your address, so childe is left with no choices but to call for someone he knows.
he uses your fingerprint to unlock the password in your phone, heading straight for your contact list, and dialed thoma.
it doesn't take long for thoma to arrive where you are, panting after running for a while, and childe is almost impressed. thoma hoists you up and you obediently wrap your arms around him.
“sorry for the trouble. [name]'s dead drunk as you can see,” childe comments, chuckling to himself. thoma doesn't look amused and replies with, “it's no trouble at all. i'd be glad to help [name] anytime.”
then in a way that almost seems possessive, thoma leaves childe behind.
so now when you arrive home, bouquet in your arms, red dusting your features, thoma is displeased once more.
(yet he is envious of those who can freely profess their affections, because he's certain if he were to ever admit his feelings to you, things can never be the same.)
gorou:
you first suspected childe because you thought the bouquet of flowers was a joke, but if it wasn't and it was real with the intentions of sweeping you off your feet...
then you might have another suspect in mind.
gorou is... a funny guy. can you put it like that? you don't know what to think of him. he's nice, you already know that very well, kokomi's good friends with him and told you a few stories about him, all of which are sweet and amusing. your first impression of him was that of a pure-hearted boy that can do no wrong.
he's younger than you by a year, and kokomi was fairly excited when she first told you he would be attending the same university soon. she promised to introduce you to him in hopes you'd be friends as well.
and okay, you could get behind that. there's nothing wrong with meeting new people. gorou sounded like a great guy too, and it'd be nice to take care of someone younger. you've been coddled by your seniors the past year as a freshman, and you thought it would only be right if you did the same to the new batch of students.
so you attended the welcoming party kokomi dragged you into. it was just a small gathering to get the freshmen familiarize themselves with older students, and she told you you'd get to meet gorou there, her eyes carefully scanning the crowd in pursuit of a specific face.
just as you were reminiscing over the past where your sadistic seniors encouraged you to drink a lot in the last welcoming party, shuddering in fright, kokomi tapped your shoulder and gestured to the brown haired boy standing before you.
it must be him. per courtesy, your lips curled into a practiced smile, exuding an amicable air. kokomi briefly exchanged a few words with him, but it looked like she was doing all the talking, the male frozen in spot as if he'd seen something strange.
he stared at you blankly, eyes slightly widened, and you slowly became unnerved with his vacant gaze, your smile faltering. you made eye contact with kokomi, silently questioning her, but she gave a subtle shrug of her shoulders, also confused by his behavior.
then, completely out of everyone's expectations, he'd dropped to the floor.
gorou had knelt on the ground with one steady knee, solemn in his endeavors. in an instant, your hand was seized, fingers enclosed in his warm palm. his piercing stare was impassioned, sincere at its core. heat shot up to the tips of your ears.
“marry me!”
his voice resounded in the entire room, earning unwanted attention. the chatter halted immediately, all eyes dedicated to the spectacle that was the both of you, and your mind began to spin, cold sweat dripping down your forehead.
your voice was caught in your throat, not knowing what to say, and all you could formulate was a garbled string of incoherent mess. undeterred, the grasp on your hand was unrelenting, gorou committed through this act until the very end.
everyone was thinking the same thing: we haven't even started drinking yet, but this little guy is drunk already??
shameless. crazy. a head with loose screws. you're probably the only one who'd describe gorou that way.
but what kind of sane man would say that upon first meeting???
kokomi quickly tried to mediate the situation for him, pulling him away and patting his back to knock him out of his dazed stupor, and pushed you to the farthest corner.
she vouched for him when she saw your puzzled expression, thinking of him as a weirdo, and she insisted he's normally not that odd. she swears he was never interested in dating before, and she isn't sure what changed for him to... propose... all of a sudden... to you, who he'd barely seen for ten seconds, no less.
naturally, it feels strange for you to see him. after that disastrous encounter, gorou — who did feel embarrassment for what he did, horrified at his own impulsiveness — tried to make amends, backtracking steps (he skipped way too many and immediately went to propose lol) and treating you normally like a friend of a friend, slowly trying to make the atmosphere between you casual instead of a freezing blizzard that kills off the amicable mood.
in spite of all that, however, you do feel as if his feelings are actually genuine. he can be clumsy, and incredibly so, you don't know who else could propose to another person within a span of a minute meeting them for the first time, but he means well! you started off on the wrong foot, and maybe this bouquet of flowers is him trying to curry your favor... or something...
yet all he gives is a disbelieving look, and that's enough to provide a clear answer: it's not from him, and he's upset.
it,, probably wasn't a good idea to ask someone who likes you about another person who likes you.
but if it isn't him, who else could it be?!
drop your guesses in the comments but im pretty sure it's already obvious lol
Hi!! Thoma makes me feel so many soft feelings ;; could I ask for a scenario where he's patching the reader up after taking a hit for him,,
“What on earth were you thinking?” Thoma scolded you, hand pushing against your back while you painfully made your way into the chair he ushered you toward.
“I don’t have to explain myself.” You were just as frustrated as he was, it wasn’t like him to put himself at risk like that and if you hadn’t done what you did he’d be in serious condition.
“Fine, but that doesn’t make what you did any less stupid.”
“What was I supposed to — ah — to do, let you get hi-ouch!” Your abs stung, the cut along the side of your body throbbed every time you moved and it didn’t help that Thoma was fussing with your shirt so he could better see your injury. He settled himself in front of you and, in his irritation, was less patient than he normally would of been with your clothes. “Thom-AH.” Hissing, you shot your hand out to his wrist, fingers digging into his gloved hands while your face contorted because of a sudden flash of white pain.
Through the tears in your eyes, you saw his expression shift from irritability to concern and behind the flash of jade eyes you could see one thing you never wished to see there: fear.
“Are you alright?” He asked, adding more support to your body than before.
“N-no, but it’s not that bad right … I mean I’ll live?”
“Yes, and your lucky you will too.” He was right, the whole situation was a sheer boon of good luck. The way the treasurer hoarders were flinging their weapons at you, the exploding bottles of elemental reactions swirled and reacted to one another set everything into chaos. It was sheer coincidence you noticed the arm pulling back to lob a spear at Thoma in the first place. It was stupid of you to bolt forward and parry the weapon but in the heat of the moment you simply reacted. If he hadn’t felt you collide against him and activate his shield arte, there was no way you would have made it out with just this superficial injury - even if it did hurt like hell.
You watched him carefully, eyes trained on his expression; the way he clicked his tongue and shook his head, how he twisted the rag and began to clean the blood around the injury. It all pained your heart but you would have done it again for him. “I-I’m sorry.” You confessed, hand pressing into your forehead as you leaned back against the chair to give him better access.
Thoma let out a heavy sigh before moving to cleaning your injury directly. “It’s me who should be sorry.”
“What for?”
“I … let myself get emotional, I lashed out at you because I …” He shook his head again, turning to look away from you for a moment only to give you a perfect view of his clenching jaw. “You put yourself on the line for me. I’m not happy because you got hurt but …” His warm fingers pressed against the wound and seemed to heat up the ointment he spread across it. You let out a relaxed sigh as the combination eased the pain. “I have to properly repay you so …”
You watched him, tracked his every movement as he reached for a bandage and placed it over your injury. You leaned against him as he helped you up just enough to wrap the gauze around your waist. The strength of his shoulders, of his arms and the security of his presence as he held you made you feel safer than any suit of armor ever could. When he was finished, he made sure you were comfortable before scooting back and pressing his hands against the floor near your feet.
“I, Thoma, give you my weapon and my loyalty …”
“Thoma … what …”
He lifted his head and took your hand in his, a careful, loving, vowing gesture that captured the words that spilled from his lips. “I will protect you, fight for you, no matter what. I will keep you safe, on this promise I swear.” You felt the tears fall from your eyes when the warmth of his kiss came into contact with your skin.
“Thoma I -”
“Nothing you say will change my mind, understand.” You nodded your head, hand shielding your eyes from his as the tears fell from them with every emotion he crafted in your heart. A shaky ‘thank you’ spilled from your throat and he caught it with his response, “Always and forever.”
"wanting to know just if you've captured the heart of mondstadt's most eligible bachelor? look no further! find out in this issue of the favonius codex - only 500 mora!"
prompt: how to know you've caught his attention + diluc x gn!reader
editor's note: part of my 7k event, relationship rescue !
"may i walk you home?"
the question is simple, yet, even the wintry air that rushes over you as you stand in the entryway of dawn winery cannot quell the warmth that rushes to your cheeks at diluc ragnvindr's words. the two of you are acquaintances, yet your heart dances to the tune of a lyre you know that only he can play. and now, as he stands close to you, with hope glowing in his ruby eyes, you feel your heartbeat quicken. you nod.
"i would appreciate that. it is getting late, after all."
diluc smiles at your words and, in a chivalrous manner that only he can seem to pull off without seeming egotistical, gestures for you to lead the way. the two of you begin the trek down the cobblestone paths of mondstadt's inner city. it is a rather safe trek back to the apartment you live in, even without diluc tagging alongside of you. knights patrol the streets with vigilance, standing at nearly every other street corner. watchful vendors with kind souls fill the areas as well, more than willing to help should harm fall upon you.
for all intents and purposes, diluc is no more than a flashy accessory. the two of you receive stares from others as you walk down the streets (after all, who knew that the uncrowned king of mondstadt even had friends, let alone ones that he frolics around in the evenings with?). on your walk, the two of you remain silent, tension inflating between the two of you like a balloon.
unfortunately, you can't think of a needle to pop it with, losing yourself in your thoughts as you desperately try to stop your flustered state from becoming worse as yet another onlooker does a visible double take at the sight of diluc by your side.
"ah, sir!" a voice calls out to diluc, capturing the attention of both of you. immediately, diluc stiffens, instinctively placing a protective gloved hand just above the small of your back and taking a slight step in front of you, as if to shield you.
"would you be interested in buying some flowers for your date?"
the vendor's question leaves you mortified, yet it only seems to relax diluc as his shoulders deflate slightly. he pauses, but at this angle, you can't quite read his expression. is he disgusted by the notion of being your date? after all, he only offered to walk you home -- a simple act of chivalry for someone of his status. diluc's hand leaves your back and you brace yourself for rejection, until you hear the unfamiliar sound of a gentle laugh leave his lips.
"there is nothing that i would enjoy more," diluc says, before turning back to look at you with a gentle smile. "what type of flowers would you like?"
you take a step forward, standing by his side, parting your lips to politely refuse. he's already done the favor of walking you home. receiving flowers in addition to his company is far too splendid of a gift than what you think you deserve. however, the briefest hints of vulnerability in diluc's expression, seen within his bated breath and watchful gaze, have all declinations dying on your lips. instead, you muster a small smile in return.
"i would appreciate the small lamp grass, if possible," you say and the vendor immediately scurries off to retrieve a bouquet.
much to your surprise, diluc's hand returns to the small of your back as he leans over to whisper in your ear.
"lovely choice. the small lamp grass have always been my favorite choice of flower as well," he praises, words sultry in your ear. you laugh softly at his words, turning to admire the way red flushes across his cheeks in response. the action places your lips just a short distance away from his own and you don't fail to notice the way his gaze ever so briefly darts down to look at your lips. your breath catches in your throat as the two of you look into the eyes of the other.
"that will be four hundred mora, sir!" the vendor calls out to diluc, causing diluc's eyes to widen and for him to pull away. diluc's hand pulls away to fumble for the wallet in his coat pocket and you can only watch enchanted as you watch diluc ragnvindr lose his composure for the first time, haphazardly trying to find the appropriate amount of mora to give to the florist.
in this moment, you realize it wouldn't be so bad to fall in love with diluc, especially when it seems as though his own attention has been ensnared by you as well.
Request: Hi! I am in love with your writing! Could I request holding Diluc, Kaeya and Thoma’s head in your hands and telling them they’re your whole world?
Hi! First of all, I LOVE your work - it’s so immersive and I just KDHAKSNAM
Do you write for Thoma? If you do, how about something where the reader gets love drunk off his kisses? Face flushed, eyes hazy after a kissing session, I’m a sucker for those ideas 😂
Warmth, in his arms is you are surrounded by it. The intense scent of the ocean mixed with soft flowers and rich tea made your head spin, but the sensation of his lips as the pressed against your skin left you speechless.
You gripped onto his sides, the dangling bits of his half jacket. Each press of his mouth to your cheek, neck, nose, forehead left you spinning and pulling harder at the fabric. You were drowning in his warmth and it was such a lovely way to asphyxiate.
He stole your breath, held your heart in the palm of his hands and gave it back to you with each connection of his lips to your own. When he pulled away you hummed, whined, fluttered your eyes open just in time to catch him coming in for a other - an endless attack from all sides. Luckily for you, his arms kept you close as if to protect you from fading away, if they weren't you were sure to have slipped off his lap.
"Thoma..." You breathed, hot and unsteady against his cheek as he kissed your jaw.
"Hmmm?"
"What's gotten into you?"
"Am I not allowed to show you how I feel." He asked, pulled back and running his hand up your back. Fingers slipping around the back of your head.
"You can, I just ..." Shaking your head, you tried to come up with a response but your brain was so foggy it couldn't form any real answer. "Umm, give me a second."
"Shall I continue while you wait?" He chuckled, moving in for more but you pushed against him.
"That'll make it worse." Shaking fingers dug into his black shirt while he leaned back, chin moving to rest in his hand while he watched you slowly try to compose yourself.
"You're so cute." He mumbled before letting out a sigh, hands moving to cup your face and as he moved in for more you called his name, which he loved.
Hii ! ...This is my first time requesting NSFW but your work is just so nice and honestly makes me feel so loved... So, this might sound weird and plz ignore it if you're uncomfortable but how about one day (not their first time) Diluc, Xiao and Zhongli's s/o getting emotional while doing the ...do.... because I KNOW they will be gently taking care of their lover like they're the most fragile thing ever and that will make happy either way but after a hard day it is certain that I will cry. Thank you.
When you’re ready
( Authors note - I hope you are okay with me adjusting the request a bit - I had a hard time crafting the scenario in my head -- so I’m keeping the essence of the request, and also pulling it back a bit to the initiation of the action, rather than the middle of it )
Warning -> Angst -> comfort, SFW ( negative self-talk, oppressive thoughts, hints at depression-like symptoms, attempt at physical contact & initiation by reader )
Character X GN Reader | Anthology
Includes: Diluc, Xiao, Zhongli
Diluc
It was so hard, it had been so hard. Every day was something new; new situations, new problems to solve, new and unexpected twists and turns that left you drained both physically and emotionally
Now, you finally found a moment without stress and worry, and all you wanted to do was spend it with him but how could you do that when he was also so busy - so, you waited and let your mind get the better of you in the silence
Standing at the bottom of the steps, you watched as he directed people here and there, assisted with tasks that only he could help solve. His eyes fell on you and with a weak smile, you waved at him. What was eating at you - there was something settling strangely in your heart, around your mind, and no matter how many times you tried to shake it away it came crawling right back. Turning, you made your way up the stairs and hoped to distract your mind with something else that would help.
The books you liked to read rested in your hands but no matter how many times you read the lines, no scenes played for you. No understanding of the linked words entered your brain and eventually, you gave up. The sun began to set but the sound of busybodies beyond the door continued on.
He could tell something was off about you - there was something distant in your eyes, the smile that once came so easy was harder and harder to notice. How many days was it that he heard your laugh, how many weeks had passed since you last hummed your way from place to place? Lately, he noticed you staring off into space too many times to count
It was apparent that you were keeping something locked away from him - and he hated to see you like this
You sat on the bed, your eyes glancing at your hands as you tried to let the unusual thoughts slip through your fingers. If they had nothing to catch onto, perhaps they would just go away, but no matter how much you wanted them to splatter onto the floor all they ever did was cling to your weary hands.
“Y/N?” A voice called to you, his voice.
“Hey.” With a complacent smile, you looked at him. The way he entered the room, the way he stopped near you and looked at you made your arms open to wrap around his stomach. He smelled so good and for some reason that stung the corners of your eyes.
“Is there something troubling you?”
Looking up at him with your chin resting on his stomach, you furrowed your brows at his question. “Oh, not really.”
“Are you certain?” His thumb brushed over your cheek and your heart tightened. Why was he clarifying, why was he pushing - didn’t he know how fragile you were right now. There was no way you could burden him with the silly emotions that bubbled inside of you. What was the best way to help him move on?
“Yes, I just missed you.” That was an understatement, you did miss him, but what was really weighing on you was the incredible amount of stress that you couldn’t shake off. No matter what you did, it clung like leeches to your skin.
“I'm here now; you have my full attention.” He slipped free from your grip and settled next to you on the bed. His fingers felt warm as they ran along the edge of your hair, his presence was comforting and for a moment you thought his touch was the best medicine for your state of mind. Leaning forward, you pressed your lips to his cheek. The soft flesh was a perfect receptacle for your affection, when you pulled back and looked into his eyes there was no halting your impulse to kiss him.
He let you guide him, let you take the lead and when he was laying on his back, hips supporting you as you settled over him, you couldn’t help but notice his eyes full of love staring back at you. Quickly, you leaned down and tried to silence the invading thoughts that you desperately didn’t want to be there. What you wanted was right below you, he was all yours, he was holding you so kindly, and all your stupid brain could do was weep.
“Y/N?” His voice was concerned now, how could it not be when he clearly felt the warm drops of water fall across his neck. He shifted, pushed your back as you tried to force yourself through with wet kisses against his skin. “Stop, what’s going on?”
Leaning up he wrapped his fingers around your arms and in an effort to escape in any way you could, you covered your sobs with your hands. “Y/N. Talk to me, I’m worried.”
“I-I’m sorry, I don’t know … I don’t know.” You sputtered out, voice strained and higher pitched than normal - which you completely blamed on your emotional response.
“Was … is it me?” The concern in his tone shattered you even more. This is not what you wanted, this is everything you were trying to avoid.
“No, it’s never you.” You hated this, not only were you hurting yourself but you also hurt him ... why couldn't you just be normal again. Why couldn't things just be normal? “It’s me, there's something wrong with me.”
“There is nothing wrong with you.”
“Yes, there has to be. That’s the only thing that makes sense!” You felt his finger graze your chin but he didn’t try and pull your hands away. He instead curled his legs to bring you closer, rested his hand against your leg, and ran his thumb across it. “For days now I’ve struggled.”
“With what?”
“Everything.” You dropped your hands, fingers, and palms pressing beneath your eyes to push the falling tears away. Looking at him only made your eyes blurrier, your lip quiver, and, in complete exhaustion, you pleaded with a weak heart and wet cheeks.
Without hesitation, he wrapped his arms around you and held you as close to him as he could. His hand pressed into the back of your head, his palm flush against your back as his legs wrapped tighter around you. You responded in kind, ankles locking together against the bed, fingers digging into his shirt and face buried into the crook of his neck until all you could smell was him.
When the waves of your emotions began to ease, you found each breath came a bit easier, the beating of your heart felt less strained and the thoughts that were dark before now floated in a subtle grey. Diluc let you pull away from him, but his hands never left you. If they weren’t resting on your arms or wiping away your tears, they were against the small curve of your back. His forehead found a home against yours and considering how simple his affection was in public, right now he was giving it to you in droves.
“I-I’m okay now. I just let my emotions get the better of me, I’m sorry.” Pulling back, you looked away from him before continuing. “You have so much more to do, I won’t keep you.”
His head moved and pulled your attention back to him, his eyes were serious - as they almost always were - “I’m not going anywhere, I told you. If it is within my power …”
“You’ll give it your consideration.” You chuckled and found this time it didn’t seem so hollow.
“I shall do what I can if it brings back the smile I adore.” Another tear fell down your cheek but this time it was of appreciation and, as it fell onto your hand, it seeped into the skin with all the love it carried inside.
Xiao
There were too many new things, too many challenges to face all at once. It was like trying to climb a mountain face with absolutely no footholds and every time you tried to find a place to rest the shaking earth beneath your feet would send you back down again
You knew that you had to keep going, only you could reach the top of the sheer cliff you faced, but it would be nice if you could get a little support - a nice push or a gentle hand to lift you higher
You wanted to visit him, you wanted to see his face but no matter how close you got, a voice in your head always told you to turn back around. What was that little whisper, how could it have so much influence over you that every fiber of your being bent to its will? What a terrible little voice it was.
The elevator rose toward the top of the but you weren’t on it. For the twentieth time, it left without you, and as soon as it began to descend again, you turned to leave.
It wasn’t like you to be so distant. It wasn’t like you to avoid him - for him to feel your presence only to have it fade away again, what in the world were you doing, he absolutely did not understand the way of humans
Why wouldn’t you just call for him if there was something troubling you, he was more than capable of helping you get rid of it - didn’t you trust him?
You found yourself at the bottom of the large tree. The wind blowing off the water was clammy and under the warmth of the sun became sticky against your skin. Pushing your fingers against your collar bone, you attempted to alleviate the growing anxiety in your chest. The little voice was creeping its way back in and making everything you thought you were confident in fall like a plop into the shifting water next to you.
In a huff, you gave up and began to walk away but something stopped you. A dark gust of thick clouds surrounded you and before you had any time to react, an arm wrapped around your body and the dirt road before you disappeared into the mist.
Suddenly, you reappeared in the dimly lit room at the top of the inn. It smelled familiar, smelled like him, and that’s when it all clicked.
“Xiao?” Turning your head, you saw him standing next to you, his arm letting you go so you could adjust your posture and better take in your new surroundings. “What in the wor-”
“You’ve been avoiding me.” His harsh tone caught you off guard. It had been so long since you heard his voice, and even though it seemed rougher than normal, it was still his.
“... I haven’t really been avoiding you.”
“It’s been weeks since you last came here. Tell me if there is something troubling you, I will take care of it.” He crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. His head turning to look through the large open door, hair blowing in the gentle wind and for a moment the sound of the annoying voice in your head dissipated.
“Nothing is troubling me, I'm just tired is all.” You tried to play it off, slinking over to his side so you could be closer to him. The distance made the voice weaker, satiated, and you desperately wanted to keep it that way. Perhaps the lie you told him would also settle in your heart, and whatever little secrets your brain tried to keep would be deposited deep inside of your mind where only you had to suffer from them.
Your hand rested against his chest, the contact causing him to turn toward you, and with as much gentleness as you could, you kissed the exposed skin on his shoulder. Another kiss found its way further up his body until you were planting affection after affection onto his neck. He hummed, a deeply rich and throaty sound as you found his jaw and when he wrapped his hand around your waist only to push you against the wall, you could tell that he had missed you.
His lips found your neck and as his hands moved to hold your wrists, but the thoughts that kept you away from him suddenly came flooding back. Not good enough, should you really even be here, you’re letting everyone down because you’re so lazy … good for nothing. Prying your hand from his hold, you covered your eyes and bit down hard on your lip. Why, why right now when his touch was what you craved, why was it calling on the harshness that you were trying to drown out. A small whimper slipped past your lips and you hoped he wouldn’t notice but as soon as it fell into the air, he pulled away from you.
His fingers curled over your wrist and attempted to pull your hand away but you fought against him; it was useless in the long run, he was so much stronger than you even when you weren’t so weak.
“Tears?”
“I’m fine -- just giv-give me a minute.”
“I could sense your heart was clouded; is this what you’ve been keeping hidden?” He let you go and crossed his arms but didn’t leave your side.
“I didn’t want to bring this to you. I’m just having a bad few days is all.”
“I have felt worse suffering, besides, I told you to call on me.”
“I know but …”
“Do you think I’m incapable?” His question forced your eyes open, the pounding in your heart grew as your watery eyes settled onto his face. It was focused, but the way his eyes looked into yours hurt so much.
“Never! My problems -- they are just so small and … it would only bother you if I … if …” You didn’t know how to finish your sentence. It hurt too much to admit that you were struggling and to admit them to someone as capable as he was, to someone who knew more pain than most would in their entire lifetime it seemed selfish, and you wished it would just go away.
“What do I do with you?” He spoke under his breath but before you could respond he hoisted you over his shoulder and walked out to the balcony. In an instant, he jumped high into the air before settling down onto the roof of the inn. You weren’t sure when the sun had set, but as he settled you between his legs and adjusted until you were able to take it all in, the vastness of the stars quieted all the voices in your mind.
His arms draped over your shoulders, fingers dangling just above your body, bent legs on either side like a barrier to the world beyond them, and when you looked up toward his face, you could have sworn there was a hint of color to his cheeks.
You opened your mouth to speak but his hand now covering your eyes cut you off before the thoughts could take over again. “You’re surrounded by darkness; rest and I’ll protect you until it goes away.”
“Are you sure …”
"Yes."
"Thank you..." He only grunted in response, but as the rustling leaves and rattle of his charms grew louder in your ears, the whispers in your head finally began to drift away.
Zhongli
Nothing went right and you were so over the fact that nothing went right that you just wanted to toss in the towel - what was helping these people if they weren’t going to give you any kind of consideration … but no matter how hard you tried to give up, the guilt inside of you would start to eat away and you found yourself right back into the thick of it
Sometimes you were far to giving for your own good
Things were so busy and tedious that every ounce of your energy was taken from you before you even had the choice to let it go. The demands of others made you weary, but it was hard to deny them when every plea, every request was so powerful that you couldn’t help but give just a little bit more.
With a sigh, you turned to the never-ending ticking clock but before you had a chance to take in fresh and rejuvenating air, another document slipped across your table.
Zhongli watched you from his place, his eyes scanning your face every chance they got and while he worked on his own tasks there was something growing inside of you that you continued to shield from his eyes - what would make you open up to him - what would make you see him as the sturdy pillar he tried to be … what would make you trust him
He was bound to find out, there was no way to keep whatever was ailing your from his sight for too long - when you were ready, it would all come to light
You nearly collapsed as soon as you walked through the door. You were completely wasted, absolutely spent, and no matter how badly you wanted to spend time with Zhongli all your body wanted to do was sleep. Still, you had this growing and raging guilt inside of you that nothing could suppress.
When was the last time you gave him all of your time? When was the last day you spent by his side for more than a few moments? It all seemed like a distant memory, a haze, unclear and frustrating. So, in your weariness and regret, you made a decision the moment you saw him - even if you had to push through, you would do this for him.
Entering the bedroom, you found him already resting on the large bed. His legs crossed, hands wrapped around a book, and eyes locked on the pages. That was until he noticed you at the door and began to move off of the bed in your presence.
“My dear, welcome home.” His feet found the floor at the same time that your body made its way between his legs. Gentle hands rested at your hips and longing eyes gazed up at you - of course, they longed for you, this was the first time you’d returned home in days. “I apologize for not greeting you when you --”
You cut off his voice with your lips and the sudden intimacy caught him off guard. His hands slid to your cheeks and while he was accepting of your kiss, he questioned your actions as soon as he could. “Y/N? Is there something -- ah.” Your lips connected with his neck and the intensity of it stalled his voice yet again. “My … My dear …”
“You missed me, right?” You asked, fingers sliding to work him free of his shirt.
“I have yes, but aren’t you tired?”
“No, it’s okay.” You were in a trance, a guilt-ridden, mind-numbing trance to give him what you assumed he wanted. What if you couldn’t provide for him, what if you weren’t enough for him, what if he decided that one day you weren’t …
Zhongli gripped your arms and pushed you back just enough so that your face could see his, so your eyes could look at the ones that were breaking. It was like he saw everything that you were and in a matter of seconds, the trance was broken.
Collapsing to the floor, you began to cry. The uncontrollable emotions that you’d pushed to the back of your mind came rippling out like a shockwave from a broken bow. Your arms fell onto his lap, hands gripped tightly onto his clothes as your eyes let free the tears you were trying to deny and your throat quivered at your release - you crumbled before him, as expected.
“Y/N, what has happened?” He attempted to pull you from the ground but you only shook your head, a desperate plea for him to hold steady.
“I’m sorry …”
“Whatever for?”
“I thought I could hold it together. I thought maybe if I just pushed through it would be okay, but I …” You slipped off of him, hands moving to cover your face as you crumbled more into the floor near his feet. You felt lower than him, and your body seemed to replicate your thoughts.
With ease, Zhongli scooped you into his embrace. His sturdy arms captured you and hoisted you from the floor, and as soon as you could, you wrapped your arms around his neck. You apologized again and again, even after he settled onto the bed, even after he made sure you were comfortable, even after he tried to tell you there was no need, you continued to apologize.
“I just don’t want you to become unhappy with me. I can try again tomorrow, I’m just tired … that’s it, that’s why just give me … give me tim-”
He pressed a kiss to your brow and the sensation stole your voice. It was comforting and reassuring enough to knock the wind out of you even as you continued to take in challenging breaths through your now clogged nose.
“What has given you the impression I am unhappy with you?” He asked before placing another kiss against your wet cheek.
“I haven’t been able to … you know … be with you lately.”
“Ah, my dearest, that is far from what I require from you.” His hand ran across your back while the other trailed over your thighs. Taking in a deep breath, you adjusted your shoulder against his chest before brushing your palm against your cheek and glancing at his face.
“But … don’t you like it …”
A soft chuckle rumbled in his throat as he looked down at you. “Yes, and yet it is not why I love you.”
-- 'i love you' the words that could shatter mountains and break down every single wall of your tender heart --
“How do you love me?”
“A question like that requires an endless amount of time to answer, but I will attempt if that is your wish.”
You nodded, the hot tears that were just starting to leave you came again as he diligently explained in every unbelievable detail the ways in which he loved you. In his arms, he spoke and, as you listened, kind, compassionate fingers ran over your cheek stopping only when the last teardrop was captured.
cw: pure angst. major character death. blood. injuries. the usual.
————
focus, you think to yourself with gritted teeth. you can’t die here.
and yet, you crumple to the ground anyways, knees buckling as the pain becomes unbearable and washes over you. the arrow of an archer sticks out of your torso, having dug deep into your insides. moving will only make the pain worse and mondstadt is too far away. at the rate you’re bleeding out, you wouldn’t even make it there if you sprinted. so, you succumb to your fate.
is this the fate of a hero? it sure doesn’t feel like it. fuzziness clouds your brain, yet you can still hear someone calling out your name in the distance. footsteps approach you, yet you know it isn’t your enemy. your enemy is dead and you will soon join them in their fate. a hand clutches your shoulder as two knees clumsily hit the ground next to you.
“darling, what happened?” the voice is urgent and broken already, yet it’s more melodic than anything you’ve heard. it breaks through the fog of your brain and you turn to stare at the speaker with a bitter smile. archons, he looks like an angel. flaming red hair crowns pale skin, while two watery vermillion eyes look at you in shock. he bites the fingertips of his gloves and hastily pulls them off, throwing them to the side. you always loved how he took his gloves off. he always looked so pretty doing it.
“diluc,” you greet dreamily, so, so relieved that the one you love most is with you in your final moments. “i missed you.”
“hey, what happened? who did this?” he asks in a shaky tone, trying to redirect your swaying attention. his red ponytail nearly blends in with the blood that seeps through your clothes. the pain is agonizing, yet the familiar face of your lover provides some relief.
“doesn’t matter. i killed them,” you laugh sadly. “but i’m gonna die too.”
diluc’s face crumples. tears stream down his cheeks and you aren’t sure when he started crying. diluc never cries. this is your first time seeing it. as he gently lays you down to make the pain of your wounds more bearable, you can only pay attention to how beautiful he looks with tears streaming down his face. it’s unfair, really, how ethereal he looks even in times of distress.
“you can’t die. i won’t let you,” he croaks, but you shake your head.
“i’m scared to die,” you confess as his hand finds yours. “i wanted to grow old with you.”
“you can,” diluc begs. “please, please, you can, just stay with me. you’re not allowed to die, i can’t lose you.”
ah, if only the tavern patrons could hear diluc now, finally begging for something for once in his life. the man who keeps to himself now begging for someone to stay with him. it’s a pitiful sight and you don’t want your lover to despair.
“it’s alright, i’ll stay with you,” you promise, though your words are slurred. “we still haven’t gotten married yet.”
“i love you,” diluc pleads, as if that will change the tides of fate. “i’ll marry you a thousand times over, just please, you’re all i have.”
“i love you too,” you reassure him. “but...”
you trail off. your eyelids feel heavy. what were you saying? it’s unclear. you watch diluc’s lips move as he shakes you, yet you don’t hear anything. beautiful, you think and you smile as his tears fall onto your face. your lover truly is beautiful. your vision grows dark and the smile fades off your face.
diluc knows you’re gone when your vision loses focus and your hand begins to lose warmth. he still begs you to stay anyways. he begs to every archon, to celestia above, even to the tides of fate who were cruel enough to pull you from him. nobody responds.
all diluc wants to hear is the sound of your voice. yet, all diluc is met with is silence.
How cute would a relationship with Diluc and a cryo vision s/o be?! Like Diluc would be their own personal space heater, and the s/o would constantly love to cuddle and stuff 😘 could I maybe ask for a cuddling scenario with Diluc and a cryo vision s/o 😳😳
When cryo is mixed with the element pyro, there is no other reaction that to melt - and when these two elements connect, it’s easy to dissolve away into nothing
His chest is always sturdy, warm, and comforting. The feeling of his toned body underneath and pressing against your cheek, your legs wrapped over and around him, hips pushing into his sides while you run your fingers over the arm that holds you, it’s no wonder he can make you melt so easily.
The breeze drifting into the room as you soak in the warmth of the man next to you, its presence only known by the subtle movements of the curtains and shifting leaves of the trees outside. It’s afternoons like these, ones where the both of you have a moment to spare, that are your favorite. Not only did you get to relax but you were able to do so near the one person who you loved beyond understanding.
His hand slid up your back, his fingers brushing away the hair which rested on your brow. It was all in an effort to press his lips against your skin, to provide the gesture of his admiration for you and, as they rested there, the heat from his lips, you moved closer to him and buried your face into his shirt.
Time was limited, precious in this household. You knew eventually he would have to go back to his work, to attend to some arduous task brought to him by the many hands who helped him each day. Still, you wished this moment could last a lifetime. If only your cryo vision could put the both of you into an everlasting status. No interruptions, no distractions, no time limit. Just you and Diluc.
“When do you need to go back?” You asked him, your cheek brushing against his chest.
“It wouldn’t do well to keep them all waiting, I’ll have to return soon.”
“Can’t they handle things on their own? I don’t want to give you up just yet.” You wrapped your arm around his chest, your fingers gripping onto the muscles of his back, legs coiling around his as a snake holds onto its prey.
“I’m sure they can,” He chuckles, the sound reverberating in your ear, “Though it wouldn’t do well to their morale if I am not there to support them.”
“You’re far too good-natured, Diluc.” You pout, looking up at him.
“I’m not sure that description is the best fit for me.” His eyes caught yours for a brief second before he turned them away. It was infuriating to give this man a compliment, it was becoming apparent that he had a hard time believing recognition - it was as if he thought he was never worthy of it.
Calling upon your vision, you placed your hand against his chest and let a small sliver of your energy flow from your fingers.
“He-hey!” He exclaimed, hand rushing to grab yours and head snapping back to you.
“You deserved it.”
“What … why?” His expression was wrought with confusion, his breathing escalated as he looked at you with his hand gripping onto your fingers, hovering just above his chest.
“Every time you deny my compliments, I’m going to do that.”
“That is not a proportional response.” His brows furrowed but you didn’t care.
“You always play off any compliment you get, almost as if you don’t think you’re deserving of it.”
“I - uh …” He didn’t know how to respond, you were right of course, and he knew that. It was apparent that he became flustered and uneasy by the shifting hue of his cheeks.
“When people tell you something, please believe them. If nothing else, believe me.” You were serious, it flashed in your eyes and escalated as you pushed yourself off of him so you could reach his face. When your lips connected with his cheek, it was like you were taking a sip of freshly brewed tea. The warmth that spread across your characteristically chilled lips was unbelievably addictive.
You continued as your lips connected with different spots on his face, his hand long abandoning your own as it moved to hold onto your waist.
“You are incredible. Not just in who you are but what you are. I’ve never met someone who does more, who fights harder, and tries to prove himself more than you.” You pulled your face back from him, your elbow pressing into the bed, hand resting against his head and fingers lost in his hair. With your free hand, you ran your fingers across his cheek, over his collar bone. “Who are you constantly trying to prove yourself to?”
“... I’ve made so many mistakes …” He looked away but your comforting hands pulled him back.
“Haven’t we all? Diluc, those mistakes do not define who you are. You’ve proven time and time again the type of person, the man, that you strive to be. This heart,” you rested your hand on his chest, the beating heart that pounded against it brought you so much joy. “Is filled with so much compassion, kindness and it’s this heart that every. single. day. makes me melt.”
He looked at you, the honesty that shined through your gaze, the small smile that fell to him. He had to believe you, this time for sure, he had to believe you.
With slow movements, his hand reached for your face, his thumb resting against your cheek and the action caused you to sigh, to shut your eyes, and take him in.
“How did I get so lucky to have you.” He whispered, his hand pulling you toward him.
“Who knows, but you better not let me slip through your fingers.”
“I would never let that happen.” His lips brushed over yours until he stole a sweet, soft kiss from you. With each press to your lips, his became more intense until finally, he pushed against you so your back was flush against the mattress.
“Don’t you have to go back to work?” You asked playfully against his needy lips.
“They can handle it on their own.” He descended again, his hair falling over his shoulder, and all following reactions which occurred between the pyro and cryo vision users doubled.
Randomly cradling/gently holding Diluc's face with soft brushes against the cheeks, and just being totally enamored with him,, just have to appreciate how handsome and in love I am with him TT
He sat on the couch next to you, his weight adding to the bounce in the cousin until he settled against the backrest.
You knew his day kept him busy, very busy, and knew this was the first moment he'd really taken for himself. Resting your writing book on the table in front of you and shifting so you could tilt toward him, you watched as he fussed with his gloves and let his eyes close.
"You look tired." You observed, moving closer to him until your arms touched.
"There never seems to be enough time in the day." With his eyes still closed, you saw the tightness of his jaw after he took a deep sigh.
"That happens when you put everything on your shoulders." Tucking some of his hair behind his ear, you admire him. It wasn't just his looks that were striking to you, it was also his morals and dedication to see things through - even when he carried more than he needed to.
"Its on me, whether things succeed or fail." He opened his eyes and looked at his hands, "And they can't fail."
His words hit heavy in your heart. You wished he could understand how incredible he was. How much you admired him, how much others were impressed by him. He did so much to appease the guilt in his chest ...
Using your index finger, you rested it against his chin and pulled his face toward you.
"Hey," Your hand slid to his cheek as your other fussed with the hair in his face, "You do so much every day. You work harder than anyone I've ever known and you do it with integrity."
His hand moved to yours as if he was trying to pass off your comments, but you wouldn't let him escape this time.
"Diluc, you aren't alone. You know that right? I'm right here, I'll always be right here. So," Your hands cupped his face, tilted your head so his eyes met yours and smiled, "Let me hold some of that weight for you."
Avoiding your gaze, he sat there while you held him. After a few seconds, he turned his head and pressed a courteous kiss to your palm.
"... I didn't mean to make you worry."
"You didn't, I want you to trust me."
"Y/N, I've always trusted you." He slipped from your grasp and rested his head on your shoulder and there, in the quiet room on the corner couch, he relaxed against you.
When he shifted, you let him ease into your arms; you didn't mind that your work was far from your reach, because you were too busy running your fingers through his hair and keeping him steady.
