Jane's Hair Dye
It's always a shock to me when Jane shows up at breakfast with different colored hair. I wouldn't mind if she were blond one day and auburn the next. But lime green lemon yellow, raspberry red and bubblegum pink? Oh well, apparently her flaming colors are a big hit with her friends, who can often be found in our bathroom dunking their hair in bowls of fluorescent drink mixes. Even some of my clients ask how my daughter does that. So I asked Jane and she gave me the recipe, along with a couple of caveats. The color lasts two weeks, so schedule college interviews accordingly. Also, be careful to use unsweetened Kool-Aid.One of Jane's friends spaced out on that detail and ended up soaking her hair in what amounted to sugar syrup. It was such a mess the next morning that she shaved her head.
1 packet unsweetened Kool- Aid
6 cups water
Paper towels
Plastic wrap
Mix one packet of Kool-Aid with the water in a pot. Heat until boiling, stirring continuously, Remove from heat and cool to a temperature that is evenly warm but not so hot that it will burn. Dip as much hair as possible into the mixture. Then, with your head over the pot, ladle the remaining Kool-Aid through hair. Do this for 15 minutes and immediately wring and pat hair with a paper towel. Do not wrap in a terry-cloth towel because it might absorb too much color. You also may encase hair in plastic wrap and sleep on it overnight. After it dries, rinse repeatedly, shampoo and condition.
Note: Excess hair dye might stain ears, neck and forehead. To avoid this, place a band of plastic wrap around your hairline or smear petroleum jelly on exposed skin. Even if some staining occurs, dye can be scrubbed off.
Ten Steps to a Bubbles Deluxe
Usually clients ask me to do a makeup makeover—what i prefer to call a Bubbles Deluxe—when they are going to a wedding, a prom or some other special occasion. Frequently, though, women come into the House of Beauty merely looking for a change. Maybe it's their birthday and they want to spruce up, or their boyfriend dumped them and they want a new face. Whatever. There is no quicker and easier way to dramatically alter your appearance than through makeup. A little cover up here, a new shade of eyeliner there, and voila—a new you. Of course, my natural inclination is to favor teal eyeshadow, midnight eyeliner and ruby-red lips, but that's not what my clients want. They prefer a more sophisticated, together look, which is achieved by following the steps below. Oh well. Taste is subjective. Can I help it if thick black eyeliner is passe?
Step 1: Pin back hair. Apply a light astringent toner over face. Pat dry with a tissue.
Step 2: Choose a cover-up one shade lighter than your skin tone. Apply in dots under eyes, around nose, or over acne. Blend with fingertips.
Step 3: Apply a foundation that complements your skin tone. If your skin has a yellowish cast, choose a foundation with more rose. If it's reddish, choose a beige. Apply lightly and sweep upward. Blend at edges of face.
Step 4: Use a neutral, light, eyeshadow to cover entire eyelid up to the brow. Match to skin tone and hair color. For wider eyes apply a darker eyeshadow to the outer edges of lid. For deep eyes apply a darker shadow to the top of lid.
Step 5: Line eyes in pencil. Stick to soft tones. Soft gray for blue eyes. Bark for brown. Eye pencils will last longer if you keep them in the refrigerator and out of the glove compartment in your Camaro on hot days.
Step 6: Fill in eyebrows. An eyebrow should not extend beyond an eyeliner pencil held vertically against the bridge of your nose. If it does, bring out the tweezers and numb eyebrow with ice before plucking.
Step 7: Apply mascara. Once again, avoid black and match to eye color. Use mahogany for brown eyes, soft gray for blue.
Step 8: Blush should be applied by brush only on the outside of the "apples" of your cheeks. Sweep toward hairline.
Step 9: Line lips with lip pencil if your lips are thin. Otherwise, lipstick alone is okay. Choose colors that go well with skin tones. However, this is one time when color can match clothes and should not clash. No red lips with purple dresses. Bright blondes, like me, can get away with wearing flashier colors.
Step 10: Finally set entire face with a loose translucent powder applied lightly.
TIffany's Beauty Treatments
To this day I can't figure out how or why Tiffany ended up in the commercial beauty biz. I mean, she dresses like a hippie, she believes cosmetics are the ultimate tools of male oppression, and she disdains all chemicals. Maybe she just appreciates the "good Karma," as she would say, of a cozy salon like the House of Beauty. Anyway, these all-natural beauty treatments of hers really work. I tossed my expensive antiwrinkle cream after one application of Tiffany's miraculous egg white and rosewater facelift. And clients rave about her avocado and mayonnaise therapy, which leaves hair shiny and full. Not Mrs. Illick though. She won't let Tiffany so much as shampoo her head after the burning highlights fiasco. Too bad. A few mashed avocados might have been the perfect cure for her frizzled locks.
Tiffany's Rosewater Mask
1 egg white
1 teaspoon rosewater (can be found at health food or cooperative grocery stores)
Beat the egg white and rosewater together in a cup. Wash face thoroughly with warm water and pat dry. Apply egg white and rosewater mixture over face with a cotton ball. Let dry—about 20 minutes. Wash off. Face will feel tight and clean for hours.
Tiffany's Avocado and Mayonnaise Hair Repair
1 very ripe avocado
3 tablespoons whole-egg mayonnaise
1 tablespoon honey
Mash the avocado with the mayonnaise. Stir in honey. Rub mix into dry hair. Pile hair on top of head and let sit 20 minutes. Stay away from dogs, who find the mixture irresistible. Shampoo twice and condition as usual. Conditions and thickens.
Every night dip your feet into a peppermint bath. Relieves tired feet and if you add a drop of cinnamon oil men go crazy. The witch said cinnamon's a natural aphrodisiac. Ever know a man to turn down a hot cinnamon roll? Number two: Take chances during the week of a full moon. Number three: When he's not looking, stick a raw carrot in his shorts. Bleach your mustache once a week. Keep your legs together until he proposes marriage.
Mama's Peppermint Pep-Me-Up
At Mama's age how you you feel is almost as, if not more, important than how you loo. Which is why she's been a big fan of Epsom salts for a long time. I can remember Mama coming home from a grueling day of cleaning houses—vacuuming, scrubbing, running around picking up other people's trash—and pulling out the milk carton of salts. What she didn't know then is that peppermint is a wonderful stimulus for tired feet. Combined with Epsom salts and warm water, this peppermint foot soak of hers is both relaxing and exhilarating. Now all you need to do is flip out the footrest on the BarcaLounger and turn on Wheel of Fortune.
2 cups Epsom salts
1 gallon warm water
2 peppermint tea bags
1 cup boiling water
1 or 2 drops cinnamon oil (depending on your mood)
Brew two peppermint tea bags in one cup of boiling water. Let sit 10 minutes and remove bags. Meanwhile, dissolve Epsom slats in warm water in a tub large enough for both your feet. Mix tea with the Epsom-salt bath and stir. Add cinnamon oil. If water is too hot, add a little cold water. Soak for 15 minutes. Feet will feel exhilarated and tingly. Great for removing foot odor.
Martin's Friday Night Pedicure
I was completely clueless when Sandy mentioned Martin's love of the pumice stone. What was she talking about? Well, I asked Martin, and he scribbled down his no-fail system for a perfect pedicure. I followed his instructions and became an immediate convert. I don't know which step I relish the most, the warm soak, the refreshing salt scrub or the soothing lotion massage. Put them all together and Martin's Friday Night Pedicure is heavenly. Feet feel and look beautiful. Plus there is something enticing about having someone of the opposite sex running their fingers through your tootsies. Now, if only I could get Mel Gibson to give me one.
Liquid soap or shower gel, preferably one with mint
Tub for soaking feet
Two towels
Toenail clipper
Manicure stick
Pumice stone
Sea salt rub (can be found in "foot section" of drugstore, along with pumice stone)
Nail file
Buffer
Lotion
Nail polish (red is classic)
First, mix a dollop of soap in with a gallon of warm water. Soak feet for 15 minutes. Remove and dry. Clip toenails and push back cuticles. File nails so that they are square. While one foot soaks, rub the other with a sea salt rub to remove excess skin. Rinse foot. Wet pumice stone and rub on heels and balls of feet, anywhere there are calluses. rinse again. Dry and massage in nice-smelling lotion, rubbing from the calf down. Pay special attention to the tops of feet and toes. Wrap foot in hot towel. Repeat on other foot. Buff nails and apply polish.
Sandy's Coffee, Rosemary and Vinegar Rinse (for brunettes only)
You'd expect someone who runs a beauty salon to experiment with radical hair color or the latest fashionable haircuts. Not Sandy. She is perhaps the most conservative, down-to-earth person on the face of this earth. Her clothes are either practical polyester uniforms or simple cotton dresses. Her hair has been the same since we were in high school—short and curly. She has worn the same shade of lipstick—Mostly Mauve—for fifteen years. So when it comes to touching up a few of her gray hairs, Sandy doesn't take any chances. She sticks to coffee. Specifically, coffee mixed with vinegar in a spray bottle. She swears that it works, is a wonder on brunette hair and, best of all, eventually washes out. I have to admit that her hair does look spectacular after one of those rinses, rich and shiny. I wonder if there is an equivalent for bottle-bright blondes.
1/2 cup boiling water
1 teaspoon rosemary leaves
1 cup very strong coffee cooled to lukewarm
1/4 cup vinegar
2 vitamin E capsules
1 plastic misting bottle
Steep rosemary leaves in boiling water and let cool to lukewarm, about a half hour. Mix the rosemary solution with lukewarm coffee and vinegar in a spray bottle, the kind you might use to mist plants. Break open the vitamin E capsules and squeeze their contents into the bottle. Close cap and shake. Wrap a towel around your neck and spray rinse completely over hair, making sure the mix penetrates down to the roots. Let sit for a half hour. Rinse. Shampoo and condition.
