Long-Term & Long-Distance in College
My partner and I met during the summer before sophomore year of high school, and quickly developed feelings for each other. I definitely made mistakes: I didn't talk to friends much; I sacrificed sleep and sometimes studying to talk for hours every night; I was easily upset at the idea of not seeing my partner for a couple of days, or if our phone calls had to be cut short. I was afraid of being alone. I became dependent on my partner for my self-confidence and my happiness.
I slowly (finally) realized that I deserved to feel better, that I would be lovable even if I wasn't in a relationship, and that I needed to come up for air and do things to make myself happy. And it worked. I focused on school; I spent more time with my friends and my hobbies again; I felt happier and healthier, as an individual and as half of a couple.
When my partner and I started applying to colleges, we half-joked about going to the same school. We discussed that no matter where we ended up, we loved each other enough to make it work. When we both accepted offers from our dream schools, and realized that they were only an hour and a half away from each other, I felt a little more at ease at the thought of being apart.
We've now made it through two and a half years of college, and of "long-distance." (A couple trains away in the same state is definitely a shorter distance than the separation other couples endure.)
Especially because I have a history of dependency issues, dealing with the distance can still be a challenge. But my partner is very supportive and helps me feel positive. Instead of complaining about how we can't see each other again for two or more weeks, I enjoy the time that we get to spend on the phone or in person. Instead of going to a college just to follow a relationship, I'm happy that I get the opportunity to learn new things and have new experiences, attend interesting events, and make new friends on this beautiful campus. I am maturing and developing myself as an individual, which makes my relationship better. I get to experience college while feeling love and support from my high school sweetheart who is also experiencing college.
It takes a lot of trust, love, patience, dedication, commitment, snapchat, texting and sexting. But some relationships can survive long-distance. Love leaves you vulnerable. Monogamous and long-term commitments are hard. And being apart from that person is even harder. But if you want that kind of commitment, if you're with a pretty great person, if you have fun together and feel safe with them; if you and your partner are patient, trusting, caring and communicate well; then it feels easier, and is definitely worth it.
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