Nostalgic Writing

Feel free to critique or give your thoughts of my writings. You can send me your own writings and I will post them.

[nostalgicwriting]

'Is it so hard to be happy?

Apparently so.

It's impossible for me to just be happy

I'm also stressed, anxious, hurt,

But I dont show these feelings.

I keep them bottled up in me,

Even though I want to let them all out,

Or at least tell someone, anyone.

And yet the one person I want to tell them to,

Is too busy dealing with their own problems,

As is everyone else in this world.

So I keep them all inside me,

Hoping one day, you'll listen to me,

Just as I've listened to you all this time.'

thequotingselenophile

~I’m sorry this is a little over due, I haven’t been on much for a while, but great work!

[nostalgicwriting]

The night that never ended

I still have nightmares about that night. The night that you took something from me I will never get back. I never thought you had it in you. To take my pride; my dignity. And to leave that night tattooed in my memory forever. That night... Such a vulnerable night for me. Your words haunt me every second of my life. Words that now have an entirely new meaning to me. “It’s okay” “Just let it happen” “promise I will make you feel better” I remember saying over and over “Please stop, I don’t want to do this” While the thoughts in my head were, “Why me? What did I do to deserve this?” As much as I begged you and fought for you to just let me leave, You wouldn’t let me go. And you wouldn’t stop, I went numb, It felt like it would never end. Which, it never did.. Not for me at least. You changed me. Now I look over my shoulder when I am walking somewhere. My heart beats faster and faster when I feel like someone is following me. I never feel safe, sometimes not even in my own bed because that’s where I am haunted by the nightmares of you that never end. You laughed; I cried. You were proud; I was numb. You told everyone; I told no one. You had sex; I was raped.... ~nostalgicwriting

[nostalgicwriting]

“If we meet, I beg you, don’t look me in the eyes. You see I have this problem with attachment, and if your eyes are blue, I beg you, do not look me in the eyes for they will remind me of the ocean and I will be so intrigued that I wont be able to tell wether you care and I am being surrounded by the peaceful waves of your love or wether I am being swallowed by the water filling my lungs, drowning me in mistaken feelings. And if your eyes are green I ask you to look the other way. The emerald color will cause bright green vines to grow around my heart, I will be so distracted by the beauty of the plant to even realize if there are thorns growing, causing my heart to bleed, don’t look me in the eyes. Please if you would be so kind as to save me the ache. But oh, brown the color of depth, reminding me of unfathomable secrets, the dark color housing the agony of despondency. The brown representing the shroud of an old leather book that vows a story of an ever lasting love and loyalty. But I will get so caught up in my eagerness to flip the page that I wont be able to recall the destruction I skimmed over on the previous one. So I beg you please, if we meet, if we love, don’t look me in the eyes. Don’t let me drown in your blue eyes. Don’t let my heart become strangled by the thorn filled vines your eyes grew around it. And please, please don’t let your eyes promise me a story of unfulfilling love and care like my mothers big brown eyes did to me.” *I accidentally messed up when I tried to reblog this when someone submit it to me and now their submission is gone. I can’t even see who wrote it. I love it though and I hope whoever submit it to me see’s it so i can know who wrote it s give credit where credit is due.

[nostalgicwriting]

Sometimes the only way to express yourself is through a pen and paper

[nostalgicwriting]

The worst kind of love

Sometimes I think about you.

Sometimes I miss you.

Sometimes I want you.

And sometimes I need you.

But sometimes I remember how toxic you were. You made every issue in life disappear. You made me feel like nothing in this world could get me down. You made me feel like everything was going to be okay. You were all I had at one point. But slowly it was harder and harder to get you to come around. Sometimes I wouldn’t see you for days and that’s when I would hurt the most. Reality would set in again. The agonizing pain would come back. The demons in my head would come back to haunt me. My own thoughts would taunt me. Then, you would step right back into my life as if you never left. You would come and go as you pleased. You didn’t care about the permanent damage you left on me or anyone else. You ruin lives. Yet you don’t care. You changed my life. But most of all, you’re a murderer. Even when someone has had enough of you, you never fail to come back. I can tell when you’re around. I can tell when you have someone else stuck in your hold with a gun pointed to their head playing Russian roulette with every hit they take.

~nostalgicwriting

[nostalgicwriting]

I never would have thought it would be you

To be the one to leave a mark on my heart forever

Although I knew the moment I saw you

You would be the one to change my life forever

I knew I would fall for you, and because of that

I fell apart because of you

Everywhere I go I see you

Even though I know you're not really there

You were once my lover; my life partner

My one and only; my forever and always

Now you are a stranger

The only thing I am left with is a memory of you

A lesson learned; a story

A dream of the plans we once made

The hope that my future holds something as great as what it once held for you and I

But now I am moving on

Because to hurt like this; for this long

Is not okay anymore

You have had a toxic hold on me

One that I wasn't able to let go of

But now I am freeing my myself from you

A bad word will never come from my mouth about you

I will only have good words to speak about you

I will always remember the best of you

And the best of what we once had

Because that is what I think of you

You were the one; the one that got away

But now it is time

To take in every second of this thing called life

To be the better version of myself

To live for today; not yesterday

Because I love you; I am letting go

~nostalgicwriting