Okay. So, I know nobody reads these, but this seems worth posting anyway. Iâve done a bit of research on Systems on the way they function after being introduced to the topic by my sister (A System themselves, actually.) I find it to be a very interesting subject, and with the way the human brain functions, a very possible reality. While most any doctor or psychologist would definitely have an array of disorders to diagnose for Systems, I donât believe it is in any way a disorder or dysfunction as being a System has no disadvantage. As a matter of fact, having oneâs own self split into multiple personas would (theoretically) have many advantages. For example, by categorizing the various opinions, thoughts, functions, and emotions that make up a person into âPilotsâ - As I do not know the proper term for team members - A System may be much more rational, intelligent, and in-touch with oneself. With the many personalities that make up a human being separated into individual Pilots that can communicate with one another, decision-making could possibly be computed at mental paces that would simply confuse the average person. For example, there are three Pilots that make up Example One, who I will refer to as X. X is with their friends, and one of them proposes to go to the store for snacks. The friends discuss this between one another, each of them having various opinions. However, in the time it would take for the group to decide on what store to go to, what to purchase, or if they even want to go, a /System/ could communicate between pilots and decide exactly what they want based on each Pilotâs personal opinions. Pilot One wants doritos, Pilot Two doesnât want to go, and Pilot Three is hungry but indecisive. The System decides what /they/ want based on each Pilotâs opinion, and with each opinion having already been stated and delivered to the Hostâs decision-making area, the decision is already made and the Host knows, subconsciously, what they will want from the store long before the group can even make it to the car.
This is definitely a strange way to look at this topic, but Iâm trying to put it in terms that even the most basic of people will understand. Now, having already stated that categorizing emotions and such into conscious Pilots would have many advantages, I have taken it upon myself to put together a small team of my own Pilots. Though I do not consider myself a System, I believe this will reap many benefits, as I am constantly at battle with myself. This is purely for the purpose of having fun and trying to understand more about Systems, and is not intended for anything other than knowledge and to have higher contact with myself.
To begin, I will immediately take the most obvious of my traits - My mental illnesses - And form them into a Pilot. This Pilot is named Andrew, and is the source and backbone of my depression and anxiety. Andrew keeps to himself as he finds most human beings as annoying, cruel, or generally unpleasant. When Andrew is fronting, (Were I a System,) I am much more withdrawn from society. I tend to harm myself and remain isolated until the front changes or I am forced to leave my room.
The second Pilot, and the other less-pleasant one, is Anna. Anna co-fronts with Andrew a lot, as they have much in common. Depression is a very obvious trait when Anna fronts, and the primary dysfunction that makes Anna so unpleasant is her eating disorder. Anna is the source of my EDNOS, restricting, purging, and weight obsession. Anna criticizes herself all the time, and tries to remain out of the center of attention whenever possible, as she doesnât like subjecting others to herself, as she finds herself ugly, disgusting, and unpleasant.
The third Pilot is a much more...interesting one. Lilly is the carefree, happy, spontaneous side that I wish would come around more. She believes in doing  whatever makes herself the happiest and has little care for what others think of her. Lilly enjoys parties, loud music, fun, being social, sex, and most of all; Drugs. Lilly is my inner junkie, and whenever Iâm smoking, snorting, or on any form of drug whatsoever, you can almost guarantee that Lilly is holding the controls. She doesnât have any specific preferences when it comes to dress, but typically enjoys looking cute. Lilly is the most feminine of the Pilots and is 100% female. She is the one whoâs always cracking jokes and trying to make others happy, and though to anyone who doesnât know her she would appear as an irresponsible or even stupid girl, she is very empathetic and sensitive towards others. She canât stand seeing others, especially her friends, in emotional or physical pain and will do anything to prevent it. Although I perceive Lilly to be between sixteen and twenty, she acts childish at times, and can turn almost any situation into something positive.
Second to last, we have Lauren. Lauren is genderfluid, and while all the other Pilots are pansexal, Lauren is strictly attracted to women. Lauren fronting the majority of the time, and is rational, intelligent, and mature. However, Lauren is moderately unstable, as it is easy to anger them. They /love/ to fight and hate bullshit, but if they have a chance to throw a punch, wonât turn it down. They are the oldest of the Pilots, as I like to think of them as around thirty years of age due to their maturity. They tend to not get along with Lilly and keep their distance from both Anna and Andrew, as the negativity is generally frowned upon. Lauren is aggressive, though compassionate to those they care about. If Iâm in a fight, writing, working, or holding a gun, Lauren is the one fronting.Â
Finally, we have Chris. I wonât even go there, as he is far too difficult to describe. He tries to keep the team organized, and though he often influences the Host directly, doesnât often clash with other pilots as he is extremely independent.Â
There we have it. My mind, divided into a System. Writing this has opened my eyes to quite a bit about myself and given me a new perspective on many things. As always, Iâm NotSoAnonymous, and Iâll see you around.
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