[notsophy]

I have a Tumblr account, and I hate almost everything about it.

I originally made this account a few years ago when I started my weight loss journey. I came here to just talk about my journey, post pictures of my progress here and there, and follow people I like and that are on the same journey as I am. I liked the feedback I was getting on a few of my personal posts and pictures, it really helped me boost my confidence then and made me happy.

The thing I hate about this place is the fucking crazies who are so vile and disgusted at you for agreeing with something they don’t agree with. For ex. (This happened at 2013, I deleted some posts because of the backlash) I post a gif and tag Onision, someone comes in and replies with “Nobody cares”. I remember even being called a bitch once for sharing the “cutters” video. I know it’s only the internet, so I really try to not take things personally. But holy shit, some of those girls were so fucking persistent on hating on somebody over a video they agree with. 

I’m only talking about this because I was really bored and this just came to mind. If I do get anyone who responds to this harshly, you’re being ignored. Only just speaking my mind, not here to stir up more drama.

[notsophy]

Back again

I’ve pretty much fell into a shitty depression followed by no activity whatsoever and emotional eating. I went back to 170, which hurts me to even think about. I’m done talking about what I want to do about it, and now I will fucking do it. Not going to lie, I’m still in a pretty messed up mindset. I will push myself until I get myself back into the swing of things. There’s one thing in my life I can’t stand and it’s not having control with my own actions. I need to quit making promises I can’t keep, and just do it. 

I’m currently filling out a calendar of my workouts that I’m starting off tomorrow till November 19th 2015. (Exactly 90 days from tomorrow) There’s nothing stopping me now. I’m probably not posting till then. We’ll see.

[notsophy]

Changing up my routine just a little bit today

I'm going to skip my morning face wash and just do a regular rinse. I want to see how my skin reacts to this change. I haven't skipped a day since October 2014..

[notsophy]

Graduated high school finally

I know I gained about 10 pounds but there's a silver lining.. I've finally graduated and got rid my severe acne... I couldn't be any happier. My skin will probably never be the same as it was before but Ill definitely try to get it back to what it use to be. As of right now, I'm in the middle of Ramadan so trying to lose weight rn is hard. So my plan is to atleast get my motivation up to how it use to be. I've been so lazy, I have little will power now too... I'm still quite happy though. Minus the weight gain.

[notsophy]

LMAO

I gained 12 pounds this past month. HOLY FUCK. I'm in so much shock, I'm laughing cause I don't know how to react to this, I haven't been in the 160s in almost over a year and I gained that weight so fast. I got caught up in a bit of school work, I've been stressed and I deal with it by eating a shit ton and neglecting my exercise. I'm working out tonight because I can't let this just slide. I've been avoiding the scale for this long because I knew how much I fucked up.

[notsophy]

I noticed that my posts just involve a lot of blabbering and they can be all over the place. It’s usually when I’m in a bad place first thing I go to is a friend or online and speak my mind. It’s a trait I’m really bad at anyway, it takes a long time for me to properly express my thoughts and emotions. Whereas in tumblr, I feel like I don’t have to do that at all, I just throw up a bunch of nonsense into one post. Without proof reading or fixing my grammar. It’s quite sad and unusual for me 😂.

Anyway, now that I’ve gotten that out of the way. I’m really lazy rn and I’m suppose to be working out. But I’m not. So I’ll go on ahead and do that right now. Bye.

[fuck-yoga-pants]

Kelli from fitnessblender

[alecsarchive]

[toptiertrash]

[notsophy]

Lol

I'm leaving school early for the Mario Kart 8 update + I might have switch out of my class anyway..

[notsophy]

I took this on Friday April 17th in my room. I weigh about 153 pounds and I'm 5'7 (or 5'6 1/2) I set another 15 week goal to hit 135 by July 31st exactly. Im cutting out candy, chips, soda, pizza and burgers (except homemade burgers) completely out of my diet unless it's Friday which I chose to be my only cheat day. My goal is to workout 5 - 6x per week. I'm starting off slow and I'm working out 20-30 mins a day and I walk long distances as well. ps. I use to weigh about 190 2 years ago to be exact and I lost the bulk of weight and gained it back cause I was starving myself. But I officially started on August 4th 2014 at 170+ . I'm feeling motivated already.

[notsophy]

Going to start my 15 week goal again

This way I can take pictures of my progress (weekly) so I have a better reason to stay on track. I have from today to July 31st to reach a specific goal that I'm going to make up soon and make sure that I reach it through diet and exercise.

[notsophy]

I've been doing absolutely shitty

This sucks so fucking bad. I really wasted the past few months doing nothing about my journey and not trying hard enough. I'm getting serious today and I'm starting my day with a workout just to avoid making excuses.

[notsophy]

Yeah I haven't really gotten serious with my weight loss mostly because my body refuses to NOT be sick for a short period of time. However, I have not gained any weight (atleast I don't feel like I have) I don't really feel like weighing myself until I get better. So for the meantime I still exercise when I'm sick but not everyday or 5-6 x a week. I try to avoid eating outside too much as well. I don't drink pop or have too much chocolate.

[notsophy]

Lmao

Today I saw an old 'ish' crush at my school today and to my surprise he talked to me and asked to chill for lunch and ended our talk with a hug. Lol I was so shocked for many reasons, he didn't come to school for over a month and the first time I see him he finally gave me more than some small talk. After all of that, my anxiety started to kick in, I was so nervous during class and couldn't stop smiling and thinking about it. I had the butterflies and everything.. I was so nervous that I wasn't sure if I even wanted to be with him without my friend. Unfortunately she was in a bad situation so I had to take care of it. Either way, if he's really serious about coming to school more often then I'll have no problem seeing him and actually getting to know him. He seems nice, just caught me totally off guard today. lol

[typicxlbitch-deactivated2021062]

[jakegyllenhaal]