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19 (she/her)

[robinsteves]

leatin you will always be famous

[wrenhavenriver]

why must reductress hurt me in this way

[cl3rks]

Burn Notice. [S1.E1: Pilot.]

[platypusisnotonfire]

This is legitimately how I’ve broken into a thousand places like just act like you’re meant to be there and if someone actually ends up calling you out on it just be super confused

[platypusisnotonfire]

#I would be an excellent pentester and actually have considered it as a job many a time#when I was a kid (7-14ish) my grandmother was in the hospital a lot and I was a bored kid that no one was really watching#and we spent days and days at the hospital over the course of those years#so I’d wander around and it became a challenge to see where it could get into without gettting caught#and the answer is basically everywhere#like ther is no legit reason for an 11 year old to be in the morgue but I was tall for my age and I would carry a cup of coffee#and look irritated to be there like someone woke me up for this#and no one would question me#people would ask where are you headed and if you just exhaustedly point through a security door 97% of the time they will swipe their card#-and open it for you

I want to add that I don’t make a habit of this now that I am a law abiding adult, but recently I accidentally did this again. Having been used to having my run of hospitals and walking basically anywhere as a child, I was visiting a friend in the hospital just before covid and I was legitimately exhausted and carrying a coffee cup cuz it was like 5:30am or something dumb, and I went to leave and get to the bottom floor and i’m like “this is not the lobby” and I walked around for a bit and people kept holding doors for me so I traveled through many corridors, and nothing looked familiar, and then I realized every single door was a key card swipe and everyone had mag-stripe badges with varying security levels and I realized I had gotton onto a staff elevator with the staff, who had swiped their card to go down into a high-security area of the building, and people had just been letting me through all these security doors.

So then I had to out myself and be like “Um I accidentally broke into you high-security wing, please show me the door, I’m literally just trying to leave this hospital” and I had to get like searched and stuff. 

And what was funny was that while I was blissfully walking around assuming I belonged, No one questioned ANYTHING and in fact, were violating protocols left and right to let me through, but the VERY SECOND I realized I was not where I was supposed to be and let that show on my face, like three people in the hall confronted me. 

So the take away is, be confident that you belong, look exhausted and like you don’t want to be there, and carry a cup of coffee. It will open pretty much all doors.

@clutchkuza I feel like you need to hear this lol

[i-am-corbin-dallas]

No joke, Burn Notice is a great show. If you like Leverage, give Burn Notice a try (its available on Hulu and Prime iirc) and frfr, confidence and an excuse are all you need to get around places

[disasterlarper]

This works I accidentally broke into someone’s whole ass home a month or so ago and uhhh it went fine because I’m short white and VERY CONFUSED

[echodrops]

One time while I was in Rome, I was busy admiring the ruins and not paying attention to signage, got lost, and ended up in some kind of archaeological dig or restoration. Not knowing it was off-limits (having missed all signage, as previously stated), I started peeking around all the stone stuff, wandering off the path, and most importantly (to this story), poking around in a hole that had been dug into the ground. I was careful not to touch anything, but still, clearly (to anyone who wasn’t as oblivious as me) this was not a place a tourist was meant to be.

I finally attracted the notice of someone who was meant to be part of this restoration project when I came back up from the hole. He quickly came over to ask me, in Italian, what I’m sure were the very normal questions of “Who are you?”, “What are you doing here??”, etc.

Problem: I do not speak Italian.

My brain’s solution: Quick, what language do we speak that’s close?! 

And that is how I wandered up out of a hole in a Roman ruin without warning and began speaking ancient Latin to an archaeologist.

This man’s face went through 15 different absolutely floored expressions in ten seconds, like you could physically see him going through the thought process of “Have I encountered a ghost from ancient Rome? No, ghosts aren’t real. But if ghosts not real, how Latin??? Fellow researcher??? Supposed to be here???”

So this is the story of how I was allowed to walk away without issue at all after blatantly trespassing upon the ruins of ancient Rome, because if you speak Latin, where else would you belong?

[randomslasher]

Every story in this thread is amazing

[stupidcoffeebaby]

yeah mom im ok i just dont want to be alive haha

[caroldanversenthusiast]

This is one of the best lesbian movies i’ve seen and it’s a fricking car commercial

[ldolised]

*falls in love with someone who was nice to me in my dream*

[wonderland0darkforrest]

Stay with me?

[one-time-i-dreamt]

the OG himbo - and how he won Survivor

[one-time-i-dreamt]

So for the people who’ve never seen Survivor - it’s a reality tv competition show where people are placed in tribes and can win different kind of benefits and privileges while doing different kind of challenges each week while the losing groups have to vote one person out until there are only the finalists left, and then the jury, comprised of the voted out contestants votes for the winner. So, the person who plays the best game, has the best tactics and alliances wins it all (including a cash prize of a million dollars).  The man above, Jud Birza (nicknamed Fabio for his glowy locks), entered the 21st season at only 21 and fell under everybody’s radar. I’ve seen him called a golden retriever soul in a human body, blond surfer dude, silly etc. He was positive, hardworking and extremely goofy. Everyone severely underestimated him. Some of the contestants even mocked him behind his back and to his face because they perceived him to be nothing more than what he outwardly presented. What they failed to see was that he was so much more than just that, and the entire time he was playing an amazing game. Sure, his actual personality is not much different than how he acted in the show, but he hid his intelligence well and showed an image of a man just having fun and not having a thought or care in his mind. The other contestants kept him on the show because they thought he had no chance of winning but was great at helping them win group challenges. The moment they realized, hey, the rest of us here are pretty unlikable and except for Jud, we all orchestrated plots that helped eliminate everyone else who will now be in the jury deciding our future, which means Jud has a huge chance of winning, it was already too late. He won sole immunity three times in a row and qualified for the finals in his own right and ended up winning the whole show, defeating a bland player and the villain of the season in the finals. He used to his advantage the fact that people always underestimated him for being easygoing and positive and deservedly won the game. So, he used people’s prejudice and wrong assumptions about him as his strategy to getting himself to the finals because he knew if people realized how perceptive and smart he really was, they’d know he was their biggest competition, and he did all that while remaining a great guy with integrity. Well-played.

[phatimahh]

Stages of Tumblr :

1. You create account 2. You don’t understand 3. You don’t visit for few months 4. You return 5. You become addicted

[dxactivatxdusxr]

A group of rough looking boys walked past me today and all I heard of their conversation was “he’s got that anxiety disorder bro so I went with him so he’d be more comfortable” and it made me realise the world isn’t all that bad

[fitzefitcher]

#this is team skull

[its-just-a-phage]

The pet store I worked at had a pen with rabbits near the front door. On every side of the pen were huge signs saying “You can pet me, but don’t pick me up!” One day two absolutely huge guys came in and one immediately reaches into the pen to grab a rabbit. Before i could say anything his friend grabbed his arm and asked him “did you see the sign?” He said “yeah! it says that you can pick them up but don’t pet them!” Then he went quiet for a moment and softly said “I didn’t read it right did I?” And his friend just puts his arm on his shoulder and said “its ok, i know you’ve got that thing where words get mixed up. Let just pet these cute lil shits” And I still haven’t gotten over that interaction.

[yallmightt]

I was walking my dog through Boston bc he likes the likes car rides. He’s a little thing tbh we call him short and long. So this huge scary man with a full beard approaches me like “hey can my buddy and I pet your dog? He gets nervous around dogs but your’s is so small I think it’s a good place to start.” Ofc I was like “yes he’s very friendly!” So this guy brings his equally big friend over and they sit on the floor while this man looks terrified of my tiny dog so big man number one asks “can I pick him up?” And i say yes so he picks him up and puts him on man number two’s lap and man number two is abt to freak out and his friend straight up just goes “hey man, it’s okay just relax I’d never let anything hurt you. He’s a good boy.” I’ll never forget it ever bc I know that man looked at me (5'3 , glasses, probably wearing a sweater vest) and my dog (kinda goofy looking little thing) and was like ‘ah yes the two least intimidating living things I’ve seen in Boston all day he’ll feel relaxed around them’ and went out of his way to help his friend. It makes me so happy

[mintycoolnessisrelevant]

A good post, pure.

[homerlaw]

This post generator is surprisingly coherent 

“the difference between crows and ravens is that crows romanticize sin”

[thebibliosphere]

“let’s get down to business to kinkshame werewolves”

I’d say that’s surprisngly on brand, but lets be honest, it’s the opposite of my brand.

[spacegaysss]

(wearing a black and red corset with a black leather skirt and black fishnet stockings with combat boots) i get along with others despite differing opinions about goats

[nowlivingisthis]

(leading u on a secluded path thru the woods) yeah i guess you could say i buy perfume that smells like knives?

[blasting-silence]

Amazing Nature Phenomenons

ᴋᴀᴡᴀʜ ɪᴊᴇɴ (ʙʟᴜᴇ ᴠᴏʟᴄᴀɴᴏ) ɪɴᴅᴏɴᴇsɪᴀ

ᴛᴜʀǫᴜᴏɪsᴇ ɪᴄᴇ: ʟᴀᴋᴇ ʙᴀɪᴋᴀʟ-ʀᴜssɪᴀ

sᴜᴘᴇʀᴄᴇʟʟ sᴛᴏʀᴍ

ɢʀᴇᴇɴ ғʟᴀsʜ sᴜɴsᴇᴛ

sɴᴏᴡ ᴄʜɪᴍɴᴇʏ: ᴍᴏᴜɴᴛ ᴇʀʙᴜs-ᴀɴᴛᴀʀᴛɪᴄᴀ

sᴋʏ ᴘᴜɴᴄʜ

sᴛʀɪᴘᴇᴅ ɪᴄᴇʙᴇʀɢs:ᴀɴᴛᴀʀᴛɪᴄᴀ

ʟɪɢʜᴛ ᴘɪʟʟᴀʀs

sᴀʟᴀʀ ᴅᴇ ᴜʏᴜɴɪ (ʀᴇғʟᴇᴄᴛɪɴɢ ᴅᴇsᴇʀᴛ) ʙᴏʟɪᴠɪᴀ

ᴍᴀᴇʟsᴛʀᴏᴍ

ᴇʏᴇ ᴏғ sᴀʜᴀʀᴀ:ᴍᴀᴜʀɪᴛᴀɴɪᴀ

ғɪʀᴇ ʀᴀɪɴʙᴏᴡ

ᴘᴏʀᴏʀᴏᴄᴀ (ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴇɴᴅɪɴɢ ᴡᴀᴠᴇ) ᴀᴍᴀᴢᴏɴ ʀɪᴠᴇʀ-ʙʀᴀᴢɪʟ

ᴀᴜʀᴏʀᴀ ʙᴏʀᴇᴀʟɪs

ɢʀᴇᴀᴛ ʙʟᴜᴇ ʜᴏʟᴇ:ʙᴇʟɪᴢᴇ

ʀᴀɪɴʙᴏᴡ ᴇᴜᴄᴀʟʏᴘᴛᴜs ᴛʀᴇᴇs

sᴛᴏɴᴇ ғᴏʀᴇsᴛ:ᴍᴀᴅᴀɢᴀsᴄᴀʀ

ᴄᴀᴛᴀᴛᴜᴍʙᴏ ʟɪɢʜᴛɴɪɴɢ (ɴᴇᴠᴇʀᴇɴᴅɪɴɢ sᴛᴏʀᴍ) ᴠᴇɴᴇᴢᴜᴇʟᴀ

ᴍᴀᴍᴍᴀᴛᴜs ᴄʟᴏᴜᴅs

ᴡʜɪᴛᴇ ʀᴀɪɴʙᴏᴡ

ᴜɴᴅᴇʀᴡᴀᴛᴇʀ ᴄʀᴏᴘ ᴄɪʀᴄʟᴇs

ʙɪᴏʟᴜᴍɪɴᴇsᴄᴇɴᴛ ᴡᴀᴠᴇs

ᴍᴏʀɴɪɴɢ ɢʟᴏʀʏ ᴄʟᴏᴜᴅs

ᴠᴏʟᴄᴀɴɪᴄ ʟɪɢʜᴛɪɴɢ

ɴᴀᴄʀᴇᴏᴜs ᴄʟᴏᴜᴅs

ʀᴀɪɴʙᴏᴡ ᴍᴏᴜɴᴛᴀɪɴs:ᴄʜɪɴᴀ

ʟᴇɴᴛɪᴄᴜʟᴀʀ ᴄʟᴏᴜᴅ

[thegodskeepwinning-deactivated2]

wow

[constant-diablerie]

HEY TUMBLR WHAT’S WITH THIS HMMM

[bloominhibiscus-deactivated2022]

FUCK YOU I’M REBLOGGING THIS

[lesbianlenas]

Lex turning Lena into the villain that has tried to kill the supers with the book of destiny, but Lena has an identity crisis every night thinking to herself “why do I have this nagging feeling that deep down I used to be good and that I don’t hate Supergirl?”

ok ur MIND. that wouldve been GREAT. lena choosing to be good in the end bc at her core she ALWAYS has been and even lex’s magic book couldnt change that….kara still trying the defend lena when the entire world sees her as nothing but a villain…….kara saying to lena “lena this isnt you youre GOOD” and lena being like “no im not and i never have been. you dont know me we’re ENEMIES” and kara saying “we havent always been. we used to be friends. you just dont remember but lena we used to love each other. i STILL love you. i always will.” and lena just spiraling and being like “no. no thats not true youre trying to manipulate me”  but deep down she knows it’s true bc she FEELS it and she has the whole time…….god that wouldve been some good shit!

[31st]

obsessed with this girl in my bio class who always brings a full litre bottle of coke to every lesson, today she said “im just genuinely not a nice person” to my bio teacher when he asked her why she swore so much. In year eleven before one of our gcse exams as we were lining up outside the exam hall she came up to me and said “what exam is this” and when i told her physics she said “yeah i think i can do that” and got in line

[heavyweightheart]

in addition to the fact that people just have different natural rhythms, a big reason why we can’t seem to go to bed as early as we “should” is that nighttime is, for many of us, our safest and most fulfilling time of day. we don’t have to work, we won’t be contacted by bosses or insurance companies or collection agencies or other suffocating life business… we’re likely only to be contacted by our friends, or by no one at all. night time is release; it’s ours. we can rest or recreate. we can do things we actually want to do. who would choose to cut that short?? just to usher in the next morning when our lives are not our own again? nighttime is precious and nothing could be more normal than the desire to embrace this

[deluxeloy]

So, y’all remember that post that said animals in urban areas slowly became nocturnal to avoid encounters with humans? Apparently that includes humans.

[femaleheroes]