Maximum Shekels

N is for no shekels like I do maximum shekels is for what we all wish we were.

[polishingmirrors]

[kant-deactivated20190908]

parents at my deathbed: shouldnt you be studying 

[nahel-argama-deactivated2016051]

you dying cause you on that phone

[siegfriedandroy]

i found this story googling parrot memes and my dumb ass has been laughing ever since  

[movingtotwitter-at-hazymazepone]

DAMN SON

[h0ld-back-the-night-deactivated]

parrot is already pulling receipts on Keith

[le-sad-demiurge]

I don’t care that it’s possibly fake it’s a perfect story

[thebelfry]

good fucking bye

[thebelfry]

[tastefullyoffensive]

Phony Stark. (via pace_picante66)

[memewhore]

[tastefullyoffensive]

(via webster)

[tastefullyoffensive]

Yes you are. (via javareallysucks)

[yellonolang]

never forget your roots

fanfiction.net before they removed the NC-17 stories

going to fanfiction.net at all

going to adultfanfiction.net in the fallout of the great “purge”

figuring out that ain’t nobody actually monitoring NC-17 stories there anyway so just rate it “M”

“please R&R! concrit appreciated!”

warning: lemon

though it may be more on the limey side of lemon

“summary sux just read it”

replying to reviews in the author’s notes

author’s notes in which the characters talk to each other and the author

[angelinthefire]

#DOES ANYONE REMEMBER SONG FICS #FICS WITH SONG LYRICS INTERSPERSED THRUOUT PARAGRAPHS FOR THE WHOLE THING

[tastefullyoffensive]

(via emgalasso)

[pi4nobl4ck]

[nshekel]

*sees a newborn puppy*

me: PUPPY!

*sees a full grown german shepherd*

me: PUPPY!

*sees a hell hound*

me: PUPPY!

*sees Clifford*

me: PUPPY!

*sees Cerberus*

me: PUPPY!

[pdlcomics]

Gateway Beverage

[emchant3d]

literally nothing is more annoying and obnoxious than someone demanding you do something that you were already planning on doing. Do you know how likely it is that I do the thing now? Zero. Zero likely.

[clish-moved-deactivated20210119]

youre kidding me

[best-of-turnblr]

when my friends say theyre happy i exist

[sketchshark]

Wellness.

[tastefullyoffensive]

(via masipopal)