Ask Ellie Goulding how she feels about her fourth album, Brightest Blue, and the singer responds by exhaling deeply. âOh my gosh, itâs like a new world,â Goulding. âWhen I listen to these songs, I feel proud of them.â Ask the same question of its predecessor, Deliriumâthe polished pop record Goulding released in 2015âand she isnât quite as gushing. âI very quickly realised that when I was performing the songs, I was finding it cringe. It was like, âThis is not what I want. This is not what I wanted to do.â I was in such a bad place on that album, and Iâm never afraid to admit that.â After a much-needed break (âI had to stop touring, stay in one place for a few months and spend some time with myselfâ) and a brief foray into a Beach Boys-inspired sound (âI watched a film about them and was like, âOh my godââ), Goulding landed on the idea of releasing a double album. On its first (and central) part, âBrightest Blueâ, Goulding showcases her singer-songwriter credentials, drawing together euphoric choruses, pounding basslines, string arrangements and piano ballads. The album's second partââEG.0ââsees the singer delve into her bag of pop hits, with collaborations from Diplo, Lauv and the late Juice WRLD. âI've always been a vocalist and a musician and a songwriter, but I think sometimes that's got lost and blurred a bit,â says Goulding. âThat's why I want to release both sides of this album. I do really appreciate the songs [on âEG.0â]âI love their lightheartedness. But actually, I think Iâm a lot more than that.â
âBrightest Blueâ is Gouldingâs most powerful (and empowered) work to dateâa raw, vulnerable and thrilling exploration of the âchaos and corruptionâ of her twenties. Here, Goulding ruminates on eye-roll-inducing dates with narcissists (the pulsating, prowling âPowerâ), exes she canât quite shake (âFluxâ, âBleachâ) and growing into womanhood. Such themes might not be quite what you expect from a singer who, in 2019, got married to art dealer Caspar Jopling. âWhen I got married, I think everyone around expected me to suddenly start writing about the joy of being in love,â she says. âBut my relationship feels separate from what I do. There was so much unravelling for me to do over the last 10 years that I have a real backlog of things to talk about. You wonât be hearing any songs about marriage anytime soon.â What you will hear, by the serene final track, is resolutionâand Goulding the most in control sheâs ever been. âI think writing this music has made me feel a new kind of confidence in my songwriting ability and believing in myself for once. Itâs really cool when you feel like youâve got to a point where youâre starting to be the artist you always were.â Here, let Goulding walk you through the 13 songs that make up âBrightest Blueâ, one at a time.
Start (feat. serpentwithfeet)
âI remember opening Delirium with âAftertasteâ, which is big, kind of hypnotic, a bit tribal. I'd start all my festivals with that song. On this album, I was conscious that I wanted to start with something that was still hypnotic, but which didn't quite give away what the album was going to be. I got serpentwithfeet on the track because I wanted there to be a kind of beautiful disruption and I just had this instinct that I wanted him on the first track. Itâs so special and he nailed it. I think I always end up associating things back to a person. But when I say âI can start a truce for anyone but youâ on this song, maybe it's not a person. Maybe it's a figment of my imagination. Something that holds me back or something that pulls me forward. So when I say âyouâ, it's not necessarily about a person. It's just about an enigmatic thing.â
Power
âThe bass here is just so sexy. It reminded me of a mix of George Michael and Annie Lennox and that kind of â80s sexual thing. There was something about it. I did so many different bits and pieces with [English songwriter and producer] Jamie Scott. We did folk songs. We did ballads. We did dance records. Then it ended up just being this strange, disjointed track that was very synth-heavy. It has this really big chorus that's almost celebrating something that, ultimately, is pretty depressing. It's like a first date where youâre completely uninspired in some bar somewhere. Just kind of being sick of this superficiality of everything, which I think has been driven by things like InstagramâI think it's a real thing. I suppose I also like the idea of a woman feeling empowered while singing this song, even though the lyrics suggest that she's been weakened by this unknown guy. The lyrics say, âKeep making me need a new fix,â like I need something more and more. Youâve got me addicted to you like a drug. It's a sexual thing as well.â
How Deep Is Too Deep
âI think I have licence to say things [in music] that I perhaps wouldn't say in real life. I would never say to someone, âI can do so much better than you,â which is a lyric in this song. I just wouldn't. But at the same time, I feel like so many women need to be empowered with things like that, and need to understand not to settle for someone just because you need someone. Honestly, when I say things like that, I want to protect women, and I want them to sing out a line and be like, âOh, you know what? I'm with this guy for the wrong reasons, and actually he just makes me feel like shit.â I think that I definitely went through situations in my teens and my twenties where I was always desperate for something to be deeper and deeper, but then I couldn't really figure out what that was. I guess all along, it was because I wasn't actually feeling real love. I was just trying to make something more than what it was, and give it more substance. Itâs really a song about passion and lust for someone that, actually, is just screwing you over.â
Cyan
ââHide and Seekâ by Imogen Heap changed my life. When I first heard it, I was like, âDamn.â Iâd never heard anything like it before. I was really inspired by the fact that she could create such a powerful song with just her voice. This track is the moment where I explain the next one, âLove Iâm Givenâ. At the beginning of the track, you hear me speaking. I'm trying to summarise why I think the way I do and everything that's made me who I am. That was a very honest moment there. I think I've always found it easy to be very honest and open about my feelings. Not necessarily in person talking to people, but I've always been able to write things down well.â
Love Iâm Given
âThis does touch on impostor syndrome a bit. What I'm trying to sing about is that I don't think I've always treated people right, and I think that there's been some times in my life where I've been troubled and it's affected the way that I treat people, and the love I give people. I was destructive, and I think it was based on coping mechanisms of trying to pretend to be this person who was the most resilient about what was going on, and that the personality and the love, everything that I gave with that, wasn't right. I donât know, maybe everyone goes through this kind of self-realisation. All I know for me is that it affected my jobâI was performing well, and I was selling records, and I was doing all that stuff, but as an artist I felt like I wasn't really giving my purest self. In âLove Iâm Givenâ, I think I had this moment of redemption. Or trying to rid yourself of sin. Vindication. Absolution. Those are the words I associate with this song. I'm just like, âRight. I feel like I've redeemed myself now, and it's time to move on.ââ
New Heights
âI wrote it in a studio in Soho, in New York. I was by myself, and I just came up with these piano chords. The song feels like a waltz. But to me it felt like a waltz where you're just dancing by yourself. It was about reaching this point where youâre just like, âOh my god, Iâve found this ultimate independence and security in myself and my love for myself.â It just felt like it had to be that kind of sound because it feels hypnotically joyful. It feels like a resolution. Like you've really found this amazing peace. This is one of my favourite songs on the album. When I say, âLove without someone else feels so bright,â I think at the time I was just thinking about this immense independence, and I was shouting from the rooftops because I was like, âThis is amazing. Who knew that life could be so great by yourself?â Because I spent all my time doting over these guys, and actually, really, the answer was in myself all along.â
Ode to Myself
âI felt like, on this album, I really had to try and acknowledge myself. I've always taken up quite a lot of my album space for singing about other people. And I was like, âWell, what happens if I actually just write for myself?â I thought it was a good moment for people to understand where I was coming from with this album.â
Woman
âThis is meant to be a song with just me and piano, but I slightly manipulated it to make it flow with the album. I know that I'll be performing this song so much, and Iâm looking forward to hearing it in its purest form. But I also made sure that the production didn't take away from the song in any way. Itâs me really singing about my honesty and my place as a woman and how I'm feeling, and the feeling that I still need to figure out where I stand and what's next for me. It was the most simple way that I could really describe coming into womanhood. I love the lyric âIâm done listening to another manâs music, so Iâm leaving with another drink in my hand.â I think that's one of my favourite lines on the album. Itâs me expressing that I know for a fact that male artists have been favoured over me for thingsâregardless of their quality or success. Naturally, that bothers me, and I think that instinctively, for all female artists, they feel like they've always had to try that bit harder or go that bit further, when in a fairer world that wouldn't have to be the case. I think people are finally waking up and there's a lot of change happening. I love the image of me walking out the bar with a drink in my hand and just being like, âSee ya!ââ
Tides
âI had so much fun writing this song. This wasnât a dance record, but I was listening to people like The Blaze and Jamie xx at the time and wanted to make something that was an anti-dance record. I loved sampling my voice all over the place, and then singing and saying things like âTake those elbows off the tableâ and shit that your parents used to say to you. And then just talking about my time in New York and telling this fairy-tale story about meeting this person. I also love that sentimental stuff here, like, âI want to stay with you tonight. I want to go against the tide. I want to be with you even if it means sacrificing something.â This song wasnât really about anyone. I was listening to The Blaze, and they have such empty lyrics, but at the same time, they're so meaningful. They just sing random lines that you would probably find in old pop songs, like ABBA songs. And then they would just put it over this really simple beat with a really euphoric sense. I love that idea. I've had quite a few people tell me that this is their favourite song on this record.â
Wine Drunk
âThis is my inner dialogue. It's me just talking, and it reminds me of when I've been drinking wine and I just roll out thoughts. That's usually how I end up with lyrics. I just say what I think. I remember just reflecting on feeling like there was something missing and I finally discovered it.â
Bleach
ââBleachâ is about going back to my old habits of being like, âI want to write about how I literally can't erase someone from my brain.â Thereâs a few songs on this album, like this one and âHow Deep Is Too Deepâ, that do suggest somebody treated me badly. I like the simplicity of this song, but also how severe it is, especially the lyric âHow can I bleach you?â [That feeling] is something that so many of us have been through. You feel like you have to literally erase that person to not think about them. Obviously I don't feel like that now, but I still think about exes. And I'm really open with my husband about this. I wrote this song in LA, and there were a lot of these kinds of songs on the radio. I think I got it from that. Iâm always influenced by the things I hear on the radio.â
Flux
âI think this is really confronting something quite uncomfortable: thinking about what would happen if you'd stayed together. To me, it's quite indulgent, because it's absolutely not good for you to do this. Itâs not good for growth. But songs like this are great to sing along to and great to indulge in grief and sadness and your ex and all that kind of stuff. So I suppose I used that licence a little bit to write this. And I just thought it was heartbreaking when me and [UK songwriter] Jim Eliot, who Iâve been writing with for years, wrote, âI'm still in love with the idea of loving you.â It's quite sad, really. It's not even like, âI still love you.â It's âI'm in love with the idea of youâ, which I think also happens quite a lot in life. Musically, Iâve spent so much time the past few years listening to classical music. There are these textures and layers in classic music, and it's so beautiful. I had this guy called Ola Gjeilo, who is a Norwegian composer, play at my wedding. And he just makes such like beautiful musicâstuff that really hits the soul. I don't know, it kind of appeals to the human in you. âFluxâ had something to do with that. It definitely is the most raw song on the album, and probably the saddest song Iâve ever written.â
Brightest Blue
âI talk about âthe blue evolutionâ in this song. I think itâs my version of a happy, peaceful place. Itâs about getting yourself to a place of harmony where even when bad stuff does come along and you find yourself in hard times, you can deal with it in a very different way because you've discovered this harmony in yourself. I was also conscious when I was writing this album that we were doomed and something was happening and the world was changing. I think a lot about the natural world and about how much we've destroyed it. For this song, I envisaged things connected with nature and flowers and all the beautiful things we associate the outdoors with. It was like a utopiaâkind of like reaching this place of incredible enlightenment. I think the most poignant lyric on the album for me is âMaybe because we're doomed, we're whole.â So it's just sort of accepting fate and just being in a state of like harmonious kind of acceptance. Then thereâs the lyric âYouâre my greatest revelation,â which, again, wasnât necessarily referring to a person, more to an energy. Like my greatest revelation was like the fact that I've reached this point of ultimate independence. It's so crucial and it really is a recurring theme of the album. And I was in such a good place that I think that it was like a hyper kind of happiness.â
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