Sassy, Passive Aggressive Pie

HMSLusitania|| Hayley || Technically an adult || I write sometimes 

[jackyoufool]

bro have yall read the mechanics of poetry?

[eglantinewynne-baugh]

@hmslusitania

[omgericzimmermann]

Nursey, that’s not an appropriate way to tell Dex you want to knock him up

[zimmerdouche]

y’all remember when we thought nursey and dex were getting the attic

[fifty-shadesofgay]

do you think the drunk Canadian scientists ever got even drunker and explored each other's bodies?

[omgericzimmermann]

I don’t remember if we collectively as a fandom made up Tango being from Jersey or not

[omgericzimmermann]

I don’t remember if we collectively as a fandom made up Tango being from Jersey or not

[halfabreath]

It is 2025 CE and Holster is currently crying about:

physical asia (he is saving to go to Mongolia)

Wicked part 1 (“it’s fucking art, Jack, you could never understand” “i said I liked it” “NOT ENOUGH”)

Wicked part 2 (who the hell has ever wanted to just see act 2 of wicked?? the critics had the EXACT same critiques when it opened - Justin are you listening to me)

heated rivalry (he’s currently re-recording the audiobook as a side project, he had notes on the accents in his initial listen)

Jack’s upcoming playoff run (but no one can know)

67 (the kids are all right)

Being in his 30’s

The tiny box he found in Ransom’s sock drawer that’s identical to the tiny box hidden in his desk drawer

[omgpoindexter]

i’m listening……..

[coachzimms]

hey guys how are we feeling

[omgpoindexter]

guys if we have nurseydex canon in 2026 you will never be able to shut me up. we’ll be so back. it’s never been so back

[omgericzimmermann]

Adam "Holster" Birkholtz would be extraordinarily unwell about Ted Lasso you can't change my mind

[omgericzimmermann]

I’m talking like updated his glasses to match Trent Crimm’s. Ugly cried over Roy and Keeley’s break up. Keeps spinning out the Roy/Keeley/Jamie poly situation conspiracy theories to anyone who will listen. He once said to Ransom “we’re just like Ted and Beard with how we finish each others’ thoughts and know each other so well!” and Ransom had to be like “Adam we’ve been married for three years what the fuck are you talking about.”

[omgericzimmermann]

Adam "Holster" Birkholtz would be extraordinarily unwell about Ted Lasso you can't change my mind

[gutsybitsies]

I think Jack Zimmermann would hate Ilya Rozanov, but Bitty would adopt him so fast.

He's feeding him, he's sending him care packages, he's sending him recipes for Shane that he's using on Jack. The two of them are discussing how to get their husband/fiance to dress nicely and chill

Zimbits will be going to a private resort and Jack will see Ilya there bitching with Bitty about the latest hockey gossip. And Shane's just there at the side, watching a hockey game on his phone, selfishly ignoring the fact his fiance is hogging Jack's husband.

And when, finally, Shane feels like leaving and taking Ilya with him, Ilya convinces Bitty to book a make your own pasta session that night instead of their planned "activities". And Jack has to live with the fact that Hollanov are definitely fucking like bunnies right now while he and Bitty listen to the longest lecture cooking pasta and Italian history.

[omgericzimmermann]

Adam "Holster" Birkholtz would be extraordinarily unwell about Ted Lasso you can't change my mind

[zimmerdouche]

may year 5 bring a huddle 4 amen

[hmslusitania]

“It’s gonna be a normal length fic. Quick even,” I said, predictably lying to both myself and my loved ones

[hmslusitania]

We're up to 14.5k and only like 1k of that is me being geeky about historical figures <3

[zim-tits]

Omgcp Anniversary Week - one of my favorite moments from the Twitter 😂

[omgericzimmermann]

Huh completely forgot about that time I wrote a shit post ficlet about Ollie and Wicks being secretly married literally days before we got an extra confirming that they were together