5 easy steps to build community
In recent years, community has become an often used buzzword. everyone wants community, and everyone wants to be part of a great community. Now we can debate what community is for a real long time, and that would be fun, but after hours, days, we'd still have ways to go.
So to save us from that, lets get right to it, and let's start by jumping into the "How we can build community"
Here are some simple steps I have found really important. And some of them are harder then I toughed when I started this journey to create intentional, deeper community.
1. Community is not about you
This was a hard one for me to understand, and yet, it's true. Despite of what you may think, despite the many benefits a great community provides to you. Community is not about you! It's more the opposite. It's about asking yourself, what do I have to give and how can I contribute to the community, rather than receiving from it.
2. Community is not about them either
Building community is not easy. And being with people is, well...., being with people. we all have experienced frustration and hurts from people closest to us. We often tend to approach community from our western mind set of right or wrong. And of course, we're [a;ways] right, and they are [always] wrong. This view often leads us to make community about "them". We judge, we gossip, we get distracted by others, and loose focus on the real thing. We need to work hard to not let that happen, and to genuinely develop love for the people we're in community with.
3. Don't make friends just to make friends
My son is now almost 7 years old. The other day my wife Emily and I were wondering how a little guy can be cool, handsome, funny, smart, and talented all together. We pretty much agreed that usually there is the smart kid, the funny kid, or the cool kid (among some). Well, Dylan is all of the above. Yes, I probably am a bit biases, but he is pretty cool, and funny, and handsome, as well as smart and talented. Everyone in his class wants to be his friend, and everyone wants to come over and play with him. And yes, hey, that's cool and makes us super proud. But it also made me think how easy it is to loose track of what's important. It's easy to build a tribe or community with many friends. It's harder to build a community based on intentional, authentic, and genuine friendships. Unfortunately we don;t really have the right words to describe this in English. I mean, who wants to say: "hey, your my acquaintance." That's just wrong. But, friendships and community, not build on genuine and authentic relationships, will fail, and will cause harm and pain to everyone involved.
4. Express happiness
Now this is an easy one, right! Be Happy. Go all out in showing your tribe that you love to be in community with them. Yes there are days when you;re totally not feeling up to that. But especially on those days, expressing your happiness about others, can make community come alive for you, and help you overcome your frustration. You don't even have to be in real life contact with everyone, all the time, to express your happiness and gratitude to them. After all, we're living in the most connected of times, ever! So send of a tweet, text or email. Place that call. Or even better, go and visit your friends and show them how happy you are about being in community with them.
5. Connect
Always be aware of the needs of your community and ways you can help and participate. Make connections where ever you go, and make sure that everyone stand to benefit. Remember, much good comes from these relationships. And keep 1. and 2. in mind and remember not to expect or get anything in return. Just know that you are spreading goodwill for your community.
These are a few starting points that I am still working on for myself, but that have helped me already to participate in community and to build my tribe.










