One (1) Whole Birb

All things re: eating and exercise and wellness. Whole30. primary personal/fannish blog: @coaldustcanary

[onewholebirb]

Pesto chicken and Alfredo zucchini noodles. (All w30-compliant, and really good.)

[onewholebirb]

So, day 31. Drinking a smoothie with my protein powder in it and god it tastes like straight sugar even though it only has a few grams of fructose. I may have to find some truly unsweetened protein powder - I’m thinking something like Bob’s Red Mill pea protein/chia seed blend, since it’s one of the few things I can find totally unsweetened. Collagen peptides are another option, and one that’s technically W30 compliant, but, eh.

Down 14 pounds from my max weight sometime in April, probably 12 pounds lost during the W30, most of it within the final 10 days. That’s good.

“Non-Scale Victories” in the W30 parlance are a bit trickier. I don’t feel better. I don’t feel worse. I feel...OK. I’ve been dealing with a lot of stress, illness, and the lingering effects of being off my meds. My face is definitely less puffy, and that’s nice. But overall...I definitely don’t feel energized, my skin is actually pretty rough at the moment, and in general...eh.

As discussed in my previous post, aside from being a bit low key about things like dressing ingredients or cooking with butter when eating out, I’m going to continue to eat Like This for the foreseeable future. Hopefully the weight loss continues, since that’s my focus right now.

[onewholebirb]

Whoops I skipped some days. As you maybe know if you follow my main tumblr, I’ve been sick as all hell the past few weeks with an absurdly awful sinus infection. This made the W30 kind of a pain in the ass, and I’m not ashamed to say there were a lot of mashed potatoes (compliant, with ghee and coconut milk) and smoothies. Everything has been ingredient-compliant with W30 rules, however, and I’ve lost about 10 pounds and my face is way less puffy. (If I could figure out what specifically makes my face puffy I would never eat the thing again, even post W30, because it is bonkers noticeable to me.)

I have one more day of the 30, and then...I don’t know. I think I’m going to basically keep eating the same on Thursday except:

1. Be less anal about ingredients (like the possibility of sulfites in salad dressing or vegetable oil as a cooking agent) so I can eat out somewhat more flexibly.

2. Add my protein powder (which is gluten and soy free but has pea protein in addition to a bunch of technically w30-compliant ingredients) back to my breakfast smoothies.

I know the point of the w30 is to get you eating “proper breakfast” but goddammit I like breakfast smoothies with my protein powder, banana, almond milk, almond butter, a sprinkle of frozen fruit, and whatever greens we have in the fridge, usually spinach. Is it as healthy as eggs and sauteed greens? IDK, I doubt it, but wevs. The fruit is probably too much of a sugar hit but IDGAF I don’t like to eat meat or eggs at breakfast, and I need protein.

I may also add legumes (besides my pea protein) back in down the line, or at least test to see if I can add them without getting puffy or slowing weight loss, because I love black beans and cannelinis and chickpeas, but I’m in no rush - it’s summer and every goddamn vegetable is ripe and abundant and I can do without.

Honestly, I could use a bit more of the natural fruit sugar hit in the mornings, because I’m off ADHD stimulants AND trying to curb my caffeine intake, so I’m floundering a bit at the energy/attention stuff. If the weight loss slows, I’ll re-evaluate.

[onewholebirb]

I’m so hungry and mad that I’m hungry and mad that I planned poorly for food today ughhhh fml.

[ghost-house-upkeep]

Grilled hamburgers, sausages, asparagus, and beets.

[onewholebirb]

Dinner of champions.

[onewholebirb]

I’m mad and wanting to eat things (but not hungry, definitely not hungry) and god is that an annoying feeling to have.

[onewholebirb]

Whoops, I’ve been bad at posting here. Today’s W30D8 and things have been going well on the ‘doing the thing’ front, though I’m cranky as hell and feeling sugar cravings. Not for chocolate (though I’m currently in my office and across the room is a huge bucket of candy) but for fruit. And a little bit for booze. But I can resist well enough.

I’m really tired and distractable, though. Being both off my ADHD meds AND off sugar is wrecking my ability to can. It’s like a one-two punch of bullshit. I just have to get through the end of the semester, but I still have so much to do this week.

[onewholebirb]

Midday update

Breakfast was a hamburger patty, green beans, and the leftover grilled potatoes, and coffee with Califia creamer. I was actively hungry for breakfast (super-rare for me) and I enjoyed eating it.

Lunch was an RX bar because I am just not hungry for anything else right now. I know I should be forcing myself to eat something because of the whole “retraining your hunger/appetite/metabolism” part of W30 but it’s the only part of the program I’m not 100% on board with, because it’s the part that for me might flirt with disordered eating. I will not eat what is brutally unappetizing (either due to content or lack of appetite) just for the sake of following a plan. Also, breakfast was big and relatively carb-heavy with the potatoes, so I’m not too worried.

I honestly feel really good and energetic. I can already tell in just 3.5 days of different eating patterns my swelling/water retention has lessened significantly. I’m overall feeling better than I have either of the last two times I did a W30. I’m cautiously optimistic that this is the right thing to be doing for me right now.

[onewholebirb]

Dinner: butter chicken (made with ghee and coconut cream in the Instant Pot) and sauteed squash. Lunch was leftover buffalo chicken casserole, pineapple, and a Larabar.

[onewholebirb]

Breakfast - an Aidell’s chicken sausage link, leftover potatoes and onions, leftover mayo/lemon/basil sauce. And 2 cups of coffee with almond/coconut milk. Carb-heavy, yes, but we’re getting there.

[onewholebirb]

Lunch of leftover buffalo chicken casserole. (Not pictured - 3 slices of compliant turkey breast.)

Dinner: Aidell’s chicken sausage link, hamburger patty, grill-roasted potatoes, and green beans. The sauce is mayo mixed with lemon basil dressing.

Feeling pretty OK physically, just annoyed by that constant feeling that something’s missing. Whether that’s actually missing cheese on the burger or sugar in ketchup OR it’s just part and parcel of being conscious of limiting my food choices, I’m not sure.

[onewholebirb]

Day 2. This is fine. (This is not fine.) My stomach is murderously unhappy, but I’ll manage.

Breakfast was a green smoothie and an RX bar. I know. I KNOW. But considering how close to being physically ill simply brushing my teeth made me this morning, it wasn’t going to be anything more advanced than that. Just gotta make it through the adjustment period. And have more time to make plain protein to keep around.

[onewholebirb]

Behold - Buffalo Chicken Casserole. This shit is god-tier delicious, so much so that it makes me tear up a bit. And I didn’t even put guacamole on it. (Tho I seriously recommend putting guacamole on it, or a sprinkling of blue cheese crumbles if that’s your bag, though obviously the cheese would not be W30 compliant.)

It stores and microwaves well, and is one of my favorite things to pack for lunch. I slightly increase the veggie ingredients and use a bit more mayo as well as the biggest spaghetti squash I can find, and I find that it makes closer to 6 2-cup servings, not the 4 indicated on the recipe. I have eaten 1/4 of the recipe before for a dinner, but only when I was ravenous. I just ate the 1/6 seen above and am comfortably full.

http://paleomg.com/sneak-peek-recipe-from-juli-bauers-paleo-cookbook-buffalo-chicken-casserole/

[onewholebirb]

Lunch: A salad with roasted turkey, prosciutto and balsamic dressing, plus that whole package of riced cauliflower and sweet potato. Cup of watermelon chunks just visible beyond.

I grabbed the riced veggies on the way to work today - gotta say, I’m impressed by the variety of plain riced or “zoodled” frozen veggies available these days. I really hate doing that kind of prep, tbh, so it’s nice to have the option. I also generally find “riced” cauliflower offputting, but I didn’t mind it mixed with the sweet potato, as long as it wasn’t pretending to be actual rice.

Tonight I’ll be making a batch of buffalo chicken casserole (one of my favs) and maybe also a batch of "butter” chicken. Not sure which one will be dinner, but I need a stock of breakfast and lunch options for the next few days.

[onewholebirb]

it’s gonna be may

Sooooooooo.

I feel like shit. 

I’m at my highest weight ever. It’s not the number on the scale that gets me, tbh. But…moving is hard, I don’t fit in my clothes, I can’t find anything to wear that’s comfortable, my legs swell up most days, and my hands and feet are so swollen that I can’t wear my wedding band or half my shoes comfortably.

My body hurts all over. Probably related to the above, moving is not just hard but sometimes painful. My knees are sore a lot, sometimes sharply so after sitting on the couch. My back and neck often ache, and I can’t get comfortable at night to sleep.

My appetites are all over the place. Raging sugar cravings interspersed with “eat all the things” interspersed with periods when all food is unappetizing.

There’s a bunch of other minor physical stuff to boot (bad skin, bad sleep, bad digestion, resurgent chronic heartburn) plus my headspace is kind of a hellscape of stress and anxiety right now. I’m off my meds (ADHD stimulant and an anti-anxiety drug) because I’m trying to get pregnant and both are contra-indicated for pregnancy. But I’m also not likely to get pregnant while feeling like such utter shit, and even if I did, I’m really…not set for a healthy or fit pregnancy right now. I worry pointedly about gestational diabetes and a host of other complications.

So I’m taking somewhat dramatic measures and starting a Whole 30 tomorrow. The last one I did had me compliant by the letter but not in spirit, and I didn’t see much effect. The previous attempt I made was more successful, because I was quite strict about the rules overall. This time I’m going full-tilt for fully compliant in both letter and spirit for at least 30 days. I am hoping that I’ll be able to continue for longer, as summer offers me a lot of schedule freedom to cook and plan both meals and exercise much more effectively than during the academic year.

I just turned 37 and I feel pretty determined to fix this. I’m also afraid, I’m not going to lie, because I hate feeling so bad and I really worry about not being able to get pregnant, not being able to be comfortable in my body, or not even being able to live past middle age. But it’s time to try.

I’ll be posting meal pics at minimum and I’m going to try to keep a record of how I’m feeling to try to get a handle on my moods. Beyond that, we’ll see.

[batteredrugosa]

Hey, I am following you here,  100% support for  this.  I have been where you are, I know how scary and terrible it feels. I was at my highest weight ever last summer and sick as a dog all the time, swelling,  having to  take more meds,  buy new clothes,  constantly in pain. Then I had the double PE and ended up in the hospital for a week ( caused by hormonal birth control, but I’’m sure weight did not help:/).  The wake up call of the hospital  and the whole 30 after was the start of big changes, and a year later I am still fat but much healthier with it. I wish you so much luck with everything.

[onewholebirb]

Thanks babe, much appreciated. <3

[onewholebirb]

Breakfast, Day 1:

Ha, so about that “compliant in spirit” thing...a bit less-so than expected. Yes, that is a smoothie in the background - a double-handful of power greens, some frozen pineapple and strawberries, and some orange juice and almond milk. Eh. I didn’t feel like cooking the greens, sue me.

Plus leftover asparagus, roasted potatoes, prosciutto, and turkey breast.

Plus coffee with almond/coconut creamer.

Lunch is going to be similarly a bit hinky (compliant lunchmeat and a big salad, plus some steamed veggies) because it won’t be until tonight that I have time to do a big cook. Still, feeling good about this. Doing the thing.

[onewholebirb]

it’s gonna be may

Sooooooooo.

I feel like shit. 

I’m at my highest weight ever. It’s not the number on the scale that gets me, tbh. But...moving is hard, I don’t fit in my clothes, I can’t find anything to wear that’s comfortable, my legs swell up most days, and my hands and feet are so swollen that I can’t wear my wedding band or half my shoes comfortably.

My body hurts all over. Probably related to the above, moving is not just hard but sometimes painful. My knees are sore a lot, sometimes sharply so after sitting on the couch. My back and neck often ache, and I can’t get comfortable at night to sleep.

My appetites are all over the place. Raging sugar cravings interspersed with “eat all the things” interspersed with periods when all food is unappetizing.

There’s a bunch of other minor physical stuff to boot (bad skin, bad sleep, bad digestion, resurgent chronic heartburn) plus my headspace is kind of a hellscape of stress and anxiety right now. I’m off my meds (ADHD stimulant and an anti-anxiety drug) because I’m trying to get pregnant and both are contra-indicated for pregnancy. But I’m also not likely to get pregnant while feeling like such utter shit, and even if I did, I’m really...not set for a healthy or fit pregnancy right now. I worry pointedly about gestational diabetes and a host of other complications.

So I’m taking somewhat dramatic measures and starting a Whole 30 tomorrow. The last one I did had me compliant by the letter but not in spirit, and I didn’t see much effect. The previous attempt I made was more successful, because I was quite strict about the rules overall. This time I’m going full-tilt for fully compliant in both letter and spirit for at least 30 days. I am hoping that I’ll be able to continue for longer, as summer offers me a lot of schedule freedom to cook and plan both meals and exercise much more effectively than during the academic year.

I just turned 37 and I feel pretty determined to fix this. I’m also afraid, I’m not going to lie, because I hate feeling so bad and I really worry about not being able to get pregnant, not being able to be comfortable in my body, or not even being able to live past middle age. But it’s time to try.

I’ll be posting meal pics at minimum and I’m going to try to keep a record of how I’m feeling to try to get a handle on my moods. Beyond that, we’ll see.