if you ever want to support someone with bpd, keep this in mind.
Its hard to put into words our inability to feel like a real person. not in a dissociative identity disorder type of way, but in a -you never commit to anything because frequent triggers sidetrack your ideals, ambitions, preferences, and you never know who the fuck you are -type of way. even if we can’t articulate it, our version of “confusion” and “feeling bad” is having our persona/mood suddenly change based on how rough or kind the day has been. we aren’t entitled to let our moods dictate our behavior, but it would help tremendously if we knew our experiences were validated rather than questioned or scrutinized, that when we say ‘i feel bad and want to die’, you don’t think we’re looking for pity or justification for our shitty decisions. we’re saying it because we would rather dissolve than feel like a terminally ambivalent little parasite. We’re saying it because we want to escape the overwhelm. We’re saying it because we don’t know how else to tell you “i’m not a real person.”
