Overcoming Binge Eating

Working my way through this book. One meal at a time.

[overcomingbingeeating]

The training is going well. As always the eating isn’t. I’m the thickest I’ve ever been now because the eating and the training have collided.

I want muscles, sure, but not like this.

What do I need to do to finally change the way my brain operates?! How do I beat this for good??

[overcomingbingeeating]

Finally broke my plateau! All this hard work is paying off. The extra food is actually starting to feel good. I doubt I could maintain the training at the amount I used to eat (and thought was healthy!)

More little muscle definition appears every week and I’m just enjoying not being obsessed about food. It’s the nicest change.

[overcomingbingeeating]

Four months of heavily structured and consistent gym work and today I noticed more little muscles starting to show up in my arms and shoulders when I'm just moving around. My weight remains pretty stagnant, which is upsetting for sure, so the appearance of muscle is a comfort. I just keep telling myself to stick at it and eventually the bigger results will come in.

[overcomingbingeeating]

Just finished my second week of the challenge and first week of the new gym program. My hip hurts but I feel good. My stats are showing that my fitness and strength are increasing so far this year and that makes me so happy. The bloating from my (approved!) two days or reckless eating is still around, so no weight loss this week. I haven’t taken photos, weighed myself, or measured, but I think that’s okay. I’m working so hard that it would be silly to do them when I know they’re going to make me feel like I’ve failed. A few more days and it will all correct itself so I will wait until then.

I am so proud of the improvements in my fitness though. I’ve really needed this.

[overcomingbingeeating]

The level of muscle fatigue I have today is telling me that I’ve been working hard and earned a day off. Everything hurts in that good way. Two big days of weights and hill climbs in a row.

No weight loss this week and I’m bloated, but it’s okay. I know my energy output has exceeded what I’ve been eating and I’ve made sure to stick to my target calories every step of the way.

It’s only Friday so I may see a drop before Sunday (the end of the program week) and I’d be so happy if that was the case. If I don’t, it’s okay. I know I’ll keep going anyway. My focus is slowly switching from being thin to being strong and athletic.

[overcomingbingeeating]

Day 7 of the second James Smith Academy challenge for the year.

It's been surreal watching the muscles in my arms and shoulders slowly start to reappear after all this time. My baggy jeans are on today. They're baggy, so they always sit low. But today is the first day that my singlet has started to look good with them. I'm starting to get shape where there hasn't been for awhile.

It's my birthday tomorrow, so I plan to have some treats. Okay, probably a lot of treats. But I don't want this to derail my for a whole week or anything. I want to take my day of celebration and then settle straight back into this. There is so much good food in my diet day to day that it feels like this is the first time it might actually be achievable.

The progress is coming and I feel so damn proud after fighting for it for so long now.

[overcomingbingeeating]

Food makes me so happy at the moment.

I get four decent size meals a day that are both healthy and tasty. I enjoy them so much as I’m eating them and then get such a strong feeling of contentment afterwards.

I hope so much that this feeling lasts.

[overcomingbingeeating]

Day 5. I'm bloated and sore from my period, but still nowhere near as miserable as I normally am. Going into my period without additional bloating from poor food choices and snacking has been a game changer. I have my regular jeans on, not my upsized period jeans.

The definition is slowly starting to emerge in my arms. It isn't there at rest, but if I reach for something or pick something up there's a little muscle that shows. I'm so ridiculously happy about this. My arms have been haunting me for over twelve months now. I haven't worn any singlets or tanks in that entire time - not even on the hottest days of summer!

It's still early days - it's only April, after all. The goal was to go a whole year sticking to this. I've made it so much further than I ever expected and to be finally able to see changes from that work has been so nice. My weight hasn't changed, but so many other (more important?) things have.

[overcomingbingeeating]

Day four of this challenge but 13 weeks in overall.

I saw myself in the mirror at the gym today. I look more athletic.

Finally!

[overcomingbingeeating]

Day 3 starting okay. I just weighed in the lightest I have in about six months. It’s still 4kg above the healthy weight target I’ve been given but I still feel like it’s an accomplishment.

I’ve agreed to the slight calorie increase to stop myself snacking and yesterday it went okay. Have similar prepped for today and trying a new (healthy) recipe for dinner after the gym, so hopefully the day continues to be successful.

[overcomingbingeeating]

Starting this challenge 2kg lighter than the last one gives me hope - this might mean I could lose another 2kg in a healthy sustainable way and finally be back to being close to a healthy body weight.

Day 2 has started on a positive even though it was after 2am when I fell asleep and I was back up at four. It helps that my gym day was yesterday so I know I can get home and sleep all afternoon.

[overcomingbingeeating]

Day 1 of a new 12 week challenge today.

I’m really happy with how the last one went. I didn’t lose huge amounts of weight, but I made some significant non-physical changes. I saved so much money by not buying takeout. I quit drinking. I learned heaps of new recipes. I built muscle. My back pain has reduced heaps. My mood are more stable and my anxiety has significantly decreased. I really can’t complain about those wins.

This time I’m hoping to keep all that going and also see some bigger changes in my body.

Day 1 done!

[overcomingbingeeating]

My weight went up again this week. I’m bloated. I also have a UTI.

Sigh.

I guess this means I have to work harder next week.

[overcomingbingeeating]

I’m still here!

There have been some significant challenges with food but 8 weeks into the program and 9 weeks since starting I am still going strong in the gym. I’ve progressed from two sessions a week to four sessions per week. I’m also dancing at least once a week and doing a minimum of 10000 steps per day. I’m the most active I’ve been since 2018 and I feel good for it.

Because my eating hasn’t been great there hasn’t been a massive change in my body. The muscle is starting to show again but I’m not any smaller or thinner. It’s nice to be feeling like I have more muscle mass though.

Still no takeaway and I never buy lunch at work. I’ve had once glass of wine in 9 weeks and it took me two hours to drink. I don’t know that I’m healthy yet but I am the healthiest I’ve been in years. It feels nice to be back on the path.

I just wish I could get the eating under control…

[overcomingbingeeating]

[overcomingbingeeating]

I’m still here! I’ve averaged 300g of weight loss/week. It’s not a lot and it’s so slow it’s not noticeable at all, but I’m still here. Until this week my sleep has improved dramatically, but there have been a few issues this week.

Food has been more challenging lately than it was at the start but I’m still doing mostly okay. The exercise is going well though. I hadn’t expected to get so sucked back into lifting weights but I have and it’s now not uncommon to go to the gym four days a week.

So it’s very slow progress, but it’s still progress.

[overcomingbingeeating]

Saturday morning at the gym. I get such happiness being here these days. Getting stronger has been so much fun.