handsome squidward but with a la la land aesthetic

eh, i'll figure it out

[imviotrash]

"Kill them with kindness" Nah, fuck that, CRICKET BAT 🏏 🏏🏏🏏*SMACK* 🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏

[the-haiku-bot]

“Kill them with kindness”

Nah, fuck that, CRICKET BAT 🏏 🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*

🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏*SMACK*🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[swagdinner]

don't listen to the haters haiku bot you got everything perfect

[the-haiku-bot]

don’t listen to the

haters haiku bot you got

everything perfect

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[laurenillustrated]

Mystery Inc. but it’s the 1890s

Who had late Victorian Scooby Doo on their 2024 bingo card? Hmm?

The idea came to me when I was thinking about Sherlock Holmes and then remembered the iconic mystery solving gang hehe

[hunklet]

people are like "no one wants to work anymore" when every job application is like upload your resume and cover letter. okay now manually type out your resume and cover letter in our text boxes. okay now answer these 10 riddles. okay now take a rorschach test. okay now upload a photo of your childhood bedroom and explain the relationship between its layout and the adult you are today. okay now show us your youtube watch history. okay now define the color "red." okay now walk into a patch of poison ivy and take a selfie of you holding up a paper saying "i <3 ivy." okay now wave your hands in the air if you just don't care. that one was a trick to cull the applicants who don't care. okay now choose a loved one to sacrifice. great! thank you for submitting your application we will not be calling you

[soufre-de-paris]

Some fairy tales may be 6000 years old

Study traces history of some of our favorite folk stories

GUYS THIS IS AMAZING

SERIOUSLY

6000 YEARS

STORIES THAT ARE OLDER THAN CIVILIZATIONS

STORIES THAT WERE TOLD BY PEOPLE SPEAKING LANGUAGES WE NO LONGER KNOW

STORIES TOLD BY PEOPLE LOST TO THE VOID OF TIME

STORIES

[soufre-de-paris]

GUYS LOOK AT THIS

OH MY GOD YOU GUYS

GUYYYYYSSSS

[dwarven-beard-spores]

“Here’s how it worked: Fairy tales are transmitted through language, and the shoots and branches of the Indo-European language tree are well-defined, so the scientists could trace a tale’s history back up the tree—and thus back in time. If both Slavic languages and Celtic languages had a version of Jack and the Beanstalk (and the analysis revealed they might), for example, chances are the story can be traced back to the “last common ancestor.” That would be the Proto-Western-Indo-Europeans from whom both lineages split at least 6800 years ago. The approach mirrors how an evolutionary biologist might conclude that two species came from a common ancestor if their genes both contain the same mutation not found in other modern animals.” 

[yuk-tepat]

How do they control for stories that were borrowed, which almost certainly happened?

[gacorley]

“ Unlike genes, which are almost exclusively transmitted “vertically”—from parent to offspring—fairy tales can also spread horizontally when one culture intermingles with another. Accordingly, much of the authors’ study focuses on recognizing and removing tales that seem to have spread horizontally. When the pruning was done, the team was left with a total of 76 fairy tales.”

This article doesn’t say how, but I bet those methods are in the paper.

[science-of-noise]

For this, they used a library of cultural traits for each culture a fairy tale occurred in, and then measured the likelihood that trait t occurs in culture c due to either phylogenetic proximity (inheritance) or spatial proximity (diffusion), using autologistic regression:

(Autologistic regression is a graphical model where connected nodes have dependencies on each other, except instead of an undirected graph, ALR is a special case that requires sequential binary data and assumes a spatial ordering.  In this case, the binary data are the cultural features).

Cultural traits states are generated using Monte-Carlo simulation and phylogenetic or spatial influence are fitted as local dependencies between the nodes in the graph representing cultural traits.  I can’t find this in the paper (though it may be mentioned in the citation of the method they used), but presumably if the spatial influence exceeds the phylogenetic influence by a certain threshold, the trait is removed.

The full paper is here.

[elenorasweet]

THE GRATEFUL ANIMALS IS OLDER THAN DIRT!!! I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!

[greenjudy]

happy to reblog this version with paper attached!

[dduane]

Story… survives. :)

[prettycolors]

[djedspence]

22 grown men chasing after a ball you have to admit the whole thing’s a bit silly

[mapsontheweb]

Forest cover map of Canada.

by @researchremora

[wormsical]

RATING: NOT CUTE

this girl does NOT want to work. she wants to go back to bed because she is sososososo tiredd. she wants no responsibilities either please.

[prettycolors]

[owleyed374]

speaking to smo online

it goes great

then you tell them your ethnicity

the vibe completely changes

:(

[owleyed374]

I’m in love :)

[owleyed374]

nvm, let’s not do that again for a hot second lmfao

[owleyed374]

I’m in love :)

[ageofgeek]

the special relationship is as strong as ever, lads

[writing-prompt-s]

You died and found yourself revived as your max level character in your favourite game. But centuries have passed and the land has undergone a renaissance and nearly everything you know is outdated - including the new max level. You’re going to need to grind back up to survive in this new world

[prettycolors]

[prettycolors]

[prettycolors]