It takes a lot of courage to pack up and move away from the thing you love. To say 'no fuck this, I love it but it's hurting me' to something you've been doing for a large portion of your life. The blogs that have done that, that have moved onto different forums so that they could continue doing what they love, they're courageous. I admire them.
But I don't feel courageous. I feel lonely and lost and more importantly, pissed the fuck off.
And there's no reason I should be feeling this way because of a fucking online community. I am a nationally acclaimed debater, a gold medalist swimmer, and an amazing writer. My life is going in the right direction at the moment. There is no reason I should be stressing the fuck out, worried who's going to leave next, who's going to throw a death threat at who, or who's going to commit suicide. I don't need that on my plate, and frankly nobody does. Nobody should be driven to that point in the first place, and nobody should have to clean up that mess those reactions create.
I joined this community because I wanted to get notes on the stuff I made, I wanted to meet people who I could learn from, I wanted a place to escape when I was stressed out or back in a depression.
Instead, for the past month, I've come on to new drama each week. It's like a contest, at this point. Who can make the most drama in a week wins the douche of the year award, or something.
I've been thinking about this for a while, but the straw that broke the camel's back was the simblr-hate blog. Yeah, it's messed up to create a blog that points out other's flaws, but you know what's worse than that? The amount of backlash that blog received. The amount of hate that blog has in return received. Again, two wrongs don't make a right, here. It's never okay to hate someone because they hate you. The environment that this community lives in is a festering, infected wound. Who in their right mind would stay in, or near something like that?
This isn't one of those problems that my usual solutions can fix up. This isn't something that can be ignored, because frankly, it's unhealthy. It's unhealthy to allow myself to stay somewhere where clearly people aren't mature enough to treat others like human beings, regardless of the way their fucking sims look, or if they choose to create and share or create and keep, or any other number of bullshit causes of fights lately.
My health is my top priority, and I refuse to allow myself to continue to be attached to a community where I feel unsafe.
I am going to leave simblr, and find somewhere else to do what I love, with more mature people. And if I don't find somewhere better, somewhere more mature, then I'm going to make my own damn forum where I can control who and what goes on.
Thank you to everyone who has helped me on here, and thank you to all of the people I've met just in general. I'm going to miss the ease of tumblr's interface when it came to sharing shit, but that's something I will gladly give up a thousand times if it means getting the fuck outta here.
izzy806
gummygunk
jbbartram-illu
snowghoul