Will give free head(pats)

Independent roleplay blog for Lewd Dimension!Noire from Hyperdimension Neptunia. Warning: Will contain NSFW themes. Will still tag them, of course. Will not RP smut for the time being. This blog was previously problematiclesbiansaki.

[paelliciusdea]

4:20 AM

Noire has passed out. Please call again later.

[paelliciusdea]

"You are such a child. Stop making the banana into a dick."

“I’m not childish!” Noire points the banana at IF accusingly. “You’re childish.”

[paelliciusdea]

planeptuneswindwalker:

“And… what do you propose you do with your… culinary carving, then? Suck on it? Lick it suggestively? …Put it in your navel?”

“Actually, I was just going to eat it. If that’s what you want me to do, though...”

[paelliciusdea]

gamindustriorigin:

“Mmmm….” Robin’s fluffy ears twitched a few times before she finally spoke up. “I can allow that.”

“By the way? When did you change clothes? Not that it doesn’t look really good on you. Just curious.”

“Sweet!” Better hope she doesn’t try somehow carving a vagina into a carrot.

“Oh, but... what? I’ve been wearing these clothes for a while now.”

[paelliciusdea]

gamindustriorigin:

paelliciusdea started following you

“My carrots are not for carving Noire… So help me God if I see you turning them into something phallic I will denounce all feelings I have towards you and I will throw you head first into Silent Hill!”

“...Yikes. Um, what if it’s a non-phallic carving?”

[paelliciusdea]

"You are such a child. Stop making the banana into a dick."

“I’m not childish!” Noire points the banana at IF accusingly. “You’re childish.”

[paelliciusdea]

planeptuneswindwalker:

“…And I’m so supposed to be jealous, because…?” IF isn’t going to put up with your crap, Noire-

“...Because I’m better than you. At carving food. I can make really good-looking dicks, okay?”

[paelliciusdea]

"You are such a child. Stop making the banana into a dick."

“I’m not childish!” Noire points the banana at IF accusingly. “You’re childish.”

[paelliciusdea]

planeptuneswindwalker:

“Says the one who spent ten minutes carving the banana to look like what it is now.”

“Oh, admit it. You’re just jealous of how impressive my food-carving skills are. Jealousy is childish, IF~”

[paelliciusdea]

"You are such a child. Stop making the banana into a dick."

“I'm not childish!” Noire points the banana at IF accusingly. “You’re childish.”

[paelliciusdea]

Breakfast Gone Wrong Starters

"Are eggs supposed to bleed?"

"You are such a child. Stop making the banana into a dick."

"I know we've been having some issues, but buying sugar free syrup is going a bit too far."

"Will you stop letting your conquests stay overnight? We can't afford to keep feeding people!"

"Why is there puke on this plate-- Oh. Eggs."

"My pancake is black. Like, goth kid wardrobe black."

"How do you fuck up making a waffle?"

"I'm going to pretend you did not just say the words 'breakfast stew.'"

"I don't care if it tastes like Satan's balls, the kids made breakfast and you will eat it."

"Buy your own damn cereal and stop stealing mine!"

"Ah... Yeah, your pancake art looks... great. I think."

"You're not supposed to put hash in hash browns!"

"Your roommate just passed out in their cereal."

"Did someone piss in the coffee machine?!"

"I wouldn't call the milk chunky. More of a solid."

"I know I made a real mess last time, but listen, I kept the batter off the ceiling this time!"

"I'm pretty sure that smoothie is radioactive."

"Why would you even make this many pancakes?"

"All we have left are some crackers and beer. Eat up."

"One strip of bacon left--"

"Do you know how to get flaming toast out of the toaster?"

"I found you curled up in the shower trying to eat an omelet. That drunk."

"Tequila is not a part of a balanced breakfast!"

"Do they deliver pizza this early? Because I am not feeling it."

"You just-- You just poured ranch all over your eggs."

[cittastarters-blog]

Undertale Starter Meme

“After a great meal, I like to lie on the ground and feel like garbage.”

“Anything can make a good story with enough spin!”

“Aren’t you excited? Aren’t you happy?”

“Beautiful. Why don’t you write a book?”

“Be good, alright?”

“Didn’t you read the sign?”

“Did you hear what they just said?”

“Did you know I love to ‘get owned?’”

“Disgusting. I’d love to try it sometime.”

“Don’t you have anything better to do?”

“Don’t you know how to greet a new pal?”

“Excuse me, do you want to know how to beat me?”

“Finally, someone gets it.”

“Forgive me for this.”

“Golly, you must be so confused.”

“Goodbyes aren’t allowed in my town.”

“Haven’t I done a great job protecting you?”

“Haven’t you ever seen a cooking show before?”

“He flexed himself out of the room!”

“Heheh… The old whoopee cushion in the hand trick. It’s ALWAYS funny.”

“Hey, lighten up, bucko! I’m just joking with you.”

“Hey, that’s my emptiness, not yours.”

“I am just a silly little lady who worries too much!”

“I am only protecting you, do you understand?”

“I can’t afford not to care anymore.”

“I can’t go to hell. I’m all out of vacation days.”

“I could make friends with a wimpy loser like you any day!”

“I don’t like you the way you like me.”

“I don’t need friends! I’ve got KNIVES!”

“If I were you, I would’ve thrown in the towel by now.”

“I found a gun in a dumpster!”

“If you weren’t my houseguest, I’d beat you up right now!”

“I just want to have handsome, bishonen eyes.”

“I knew you had it in you!”

“I’m gonna need some dog treats for this!!!”

“I’m just a dozen away from a double digit follower count!”

“I’m nineteen years old and I’ve already wasted my entire life.”

“I’m not ready for this to end.”

“In this world, it’s kill or be killed.”

“I really should have killed you when I had the chance.”

“Is (the sound a baby makes) an emotion?”

“It’s not wrong. It’s just my headcanon.”

“It’s rude to talk about someone who’s listening.”

“I’ve heard they have things called bathrooms.”

“I want you to be happy, too.”

“I will bathe in a shower of kisses every morning.”

“Never interact with attractive people.”

“Now’s your chance to accept my mercy.”

“Now you’ll see my true power: relying on people who aren’t garbage!”

“Oh no! You’re meeting all my standards!”

“Plants can’t talk, dummy.”

“Quick, behind that conveniently-shaped lamp.”

“Really not feelin’ up to it right now. Sorry.”

“Remember how I said NOT to shoot at me?”

“Revenge won’t bring anybody back.”

“Sorry, can’t talk. I’m busy being popular on-line.”

“So what if a few people have to die?”

“Stop plaguing my life with incidental music!”

“Studying history sure is easy when you’ve lived through so much of it yourself!”

“Thaaaaaat’s politics!”

“That’s the trash can. Feel free to visit it any time.”

“That was fun. Let’s finish the job.”

“The only joke here, is how strong my muscles are.”

“They come. They leave. They die.”

“This is just a friendly, um, killing between acquaintances!”

“Time for our union-regulated break!”

“Too intimidated to fight me, huh?”

“Watching someone on a screen really makes you root for them.”

“Were those two robots making out?”

“What a terrible creature, torturing such a poor, innocent youth…”

“What do you think of my secret style?”

“Where are the knives.”

“Where is this? Where can I see the Anime.”

“Who knew that all I needed to make pals was to give people awful puzzles and then fight them?”

“Who needs arms with legs like these?”

“Why would I ever be friends with you?”

“Will anyone like me as sincerely as you?”

“Would you smooch a ghost?”

“You aren’t gonna tell my parents about this, are you?”

“You can’t spell ‘prepared’ without several letters from my name!”

“You can’t understand how this feels.”

“You didn’t need my help, which is great, ‘cause I love doing absolutely nothing.”

“You do not dislike cinnamon, do you?”

“You just wanted to see me suffer.”

“You think I’m just gonna stand there and take it?”

“You’ll never see ‘em again.”

“You’re filled with determination.”

“You really hate me that much?”

“You’re giving me a real workout.”

“You’re gonna have a bad time.” 

[paelliciusdea]

home - ask - submit - archive - about

not a smut blog

[paelliciusdea]

problematiclesbiansaki --> paelliciusdea

character change. i don’t really want to delete the few rp posts i made as saki, though, so i’m just making this post so people know to disregard all previous rp posts.

[paelliciusdea]

blastingfusetothisworldsend :

   “Hm… well, I know how to make cake, so I think we just need to throw some chocolate in the mix and it’ll be fine.” Clearly, Star had no qualms about experimenting in the kitchen. “If there’s no cake called ‘Apocalypse by Chocolate’, then we’ll just need to make one! Let’s see… would two pounds of chocolate be too much?” Star Breaker had a lot of chocolate around, for some reason, and she seemed like she might add literally all of it to the batter if left unchecked. It may as well be just chocolate in a bowl at that point!

“E-Eh!? Two pounds!? Wait, c-cooking doesn’t exactly work like that…!” This was going to be a disaster if Saki didn’t intervene now, she was certain. “S-Sure, there’s nothing wrong with trying something new, but you shouldn’t be so reckless!”

“I-I’ll show you how to make a chocolate cake properly! We can adds lots of chocolate, but please don’t waste everything… Oh gosh, you’re using Suguri’s food ingredients, too, aren’t you?”

So much for being quiet for the others’ sakes.

[blastingfusetothisworldsend]

   “Hmm… baking… baking…” Star Breaker apparently didn’t consider baking with someone else before. Well, she’s never done it aside from with Sweet Breaker, so… “…Oh, baking! Yes, yes, we can do that! You like to bake too, no? Here, come on over. You’re going to help me bake a chocolate cake!” Star Breaker hesitated not in grabbing Saki’s arm and dragging her over to the kitchen proper. 

   “I wanted to make a chocolate cake, but I’m not sure how chocolatey it should be. Milk chocolate? Dark chocolate? A bit chocolatey, or a lot of chocolate? Maybe even Death By Chocolate cake? Murder by chocolate? Genocide by chocolate? Apocalypse by chocolate? It’s hard to decide.” 

[paelliciusdea]

Saki let out a little squeak upon being pulled forward, but she allowed herself to be led-- or dragged, really-- in.

“That sounds, um, interesting... I don’t think a cake called ‘Apocalypse by Chocolate’ exists, but Death by Chocolate doesn’t sound bad... as long as you don’t take it too literally. Ah, do you have any recipes or something?” The other things that Star Breaker had made didn’t look bad, Saki thought as she took another glance over them, so maybe she knew what she was doing... Still, she couldn’t help but be somewhat worried. Star Breaker didn’t exactly seem like someone who would be careful in a kitchen...

[blastingfusetothisworldsend]

   “Fufu… what was that?” Star Breaker giggled as she kept walking closer. Uncomfortably so, at that. She had no respect for personal boundaries, especially not when she was feeling like tormenting someone, which was most of the time. “Do it together? You’ll have to be more specific about what you mean by ‘doing it’, girlie~”

   “If you’re hungry for something sweet, I have things already baked over there, y’know. Of course, you’ll have to offer me something first, if you want one of my sweet treats.” 

[paelliciusdea]

“Ueh? What else would I...” Wait.

“O-Oh, gosh, baking! I was asking if you wanted to bake something together, o-of course! I-- It’s fine if you don’t want to, but...” Saki poked her index fingers together, Star Breaker’s joke(?) and closeness really doing nothing to put her at ease. “O-Or do you want something in return for letting me do that, too?”

[noodle2thedoodle]

hey lets play how hot is that character

[newtscarf]

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY

[chameleon-cryptid]

DO IT. For any of my characters. Submit is open (should be anyway if it’s not working lemme know).

[blastingfusetothisworldsend]

   Star Breaker had sneaked into Suguri’s house late at night to start baking, thanks to an impulse that made her want to do so. Thankfully, Suguri’s windows weren’t too secured, so she easily got inside after breaking one. She wasn’t too sure what she wanted to make, so she decided to just make a little bit of everything. There was already a few cupcakes, some pancakes, several sweet rolls and a pie lying around, with Star Breaker laughing to herself as she prepared to bake even more. 

   “Hmmmm~?” Star Breaker turned to look at the person intruding on her as she was about to bake some chocolate cake. “Oh, Saki! Here I was enjoying my time here, baking, and my favourite little souffre-douleur walks right in~ Ahaha~” Star Breaker wasn’t being quiet at all. Also, she set aside the batter and walked a few steps towards Saki. “So, what are you doing in my kitchen at this hour, girlie~?“

[paelliciusdea]

...Oh, dear. Saki shifted uncomfortably, words lost on her for some time before she managed to speak up in reply to the other’s question.

“Uh... Kinda funny. I came to bake, too... H-Haha, I felt like eating something sweet. Wait, your...?” No... Better not to ask. Saki held back a sigh and considered just giving up and going back... Star Breaker wasn’t the easiest person to spend time in the company of, after all.

No, she could still make this work. Maybe.

...She’d try, at least.

“Is it okay if... Do you wanna do it together?”

[paelliciusdea]

So what's Saki's deep, intricate backstory like?

“Please don’t patronize me, sir or ma’am.”