Me, after coming out of a decade of depression

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sheepfilms

titsay

shark vs the universe
Peter Solarz
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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roma★
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Cosimo Galluzzi

⁂
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
taylor price
One Nice Bug Per Day

tannertan36
cherry valley forever
YOU ARE THE REASON
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Keni

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@papyterier
Me, after coming out of a decade of depression
JaJAajajajjajaaa
someone: do you speak french
me: I have seen a few scenes of that candlestick speaking in beauty and the beast
i wanna take your clothes off… ;) and then replace them with something else because that outfit is ugly as hell
most parents : afraid their child will find their gun and get hurt
me: afraid my son will find my protein powder and get too strong and then he has to be my dad
Friend: Dude wtf why did you put glitter in my coffee I was going to drink that?
Me: aesthetic
me before shaving: Ugh
me after shaving: I am smooth and perfect. I am sleek. I am the dolphin, I am the rider of ice. nobody can touch me, I cannot be touched. I am so fast. nobody could ever touch me
if karl marx was real he could beat you up, effortlessly. karl marx could rip your little twig body asunder
i have like half a foot on him and know all of his weaknesses
wait, “if karl marx was real”…. is he… made up?
reblog if you believe
just to avoid accidentally using offensive language i’m going to start using 90s surfer dude slang because inadvertently offending someone is totally bogus dude
people might not want to be called dude
you are radically right and that is so not tubular my friend i apologise
I find your poor grammar and spelling to be offensive to my eyes.
watch me catch this gnarly wave of i don’t care
i honestly have no idea why anyone would ever want to be a famous celebrity or an “““influencer””” for a career in today's world because i, speaking as the dumbest person i know, would not be able to handle seeing all my half-brained decisions put out on display to the entire world. like i would not be able to read a tmz article about me being in the grocery store for three hours and leaving with nothing but cranberry juice and paper towels. or the time i ran straight through a roundabout because i thought it was a speed bump….and stan people on twitter would be dissecting my every move like “this must be an outward manifestation of inner turmoil from a complex mind” like no!!! i’m dumb!!! none of this goes any deeper than me just being my normal dumb self!! anyway what a nightmare
It’s fun to chant “Bloody Mary” into your car’s side mirror three times and watch her jog and try to keep up.
Being a dick even to demons
Me reading academic papers: incoherent nonsense. Bullshit. I could write better than this in my sleep
Me writing academic papers: this sentence is 206 words long and contains 19 commas & a semicolon, fuck you
You either die with a bachelors degree or you stay in college long enough to watch yourself become the villain.
me
me realizing my experiences with sewing have been a lie this whole goddamn time:
I don’t know about human surgeons, but that’s a suture pattern I use to close skin all the time and you can see why.
I forgot vets existed for a moment and that comment made me wonder what Cryptid had gotten a doctorate and was performing surgery.
im going to the forest does anybody want anything?
pined cone
bring back hozier
dont cry because its over smile because it happened
wait, so what replaced it?
Oh
this is so sad Alexa play Gangam Style