PareidoliO

I write poetry to heal, to align and to transform.

[pareidoli0]

Be here now.

[pareidoli0]

I was riding my bike and realized how to fly...

I had to forgive others and me.

For every painful situation weighing me down there was an opportunity for a beautiful lesson.

My soul grew wings and I flew into bliss. 

[pareidoli0]

La dignidad viene de lo pequeño. No de ser poderoso y estar empoderado. La dignidad nace al ser humano, al ser vida. Al ser hombre, mujer o élle. Al ser uno. La dignidad es la idea de que una persona o algo tiene un valor inherente que merece ser respetado. La dignidad no se gana con títulos, ni medallas. La dignidad es algo que los demás deben reconocer en ti más no algo que te regalen. Ella vive en tu vivir, en tu respirar. La dignidad crece al actuar respetándote . La dignidad es decidir valorarte aun cuando otro te ha lastimado. El narcisismo sale muchas veces de una sensación de haber sido desprovistos de dignidad alguna vez en la vida. Es como si aquello que no le han dado, uno lo toma y lo exalta. Pero la dignidad  no tiene cuantificación. Es una y es de todos.

[pareidoli0]

A soul dances in the abyss of life and death.

Not old nor young, in essence, one with all.

Deattached of the mind, unwind all it knew.

The soul flew up, then chose where to fall, to reconcile time again and life.

An ego climaxed underneath the bed sheets. An orgasm created the living.

A young girl  playing in the mud, walking in the rhythms of the leaves that serenade the green Forrest floors.

Looking for elves, looking at birds. Collecting samples of nature to pass time, to understand the living.

Longing to grow old.

The empathy of a child’s eyes is so pure.

Why me? Why could I eat and not them, I asked my mother.

She replied that some where blessed and that was a responsibility.

Years passed, trauma built up, addictions became temporary solutions. And then came sexual abuse. 

The common unspoken trauma.

It was only until I felt like my dignity had been taken from me, that the real question came up.

What does it mean to be a woman?

Before it meant to be admired by my beauty but all of the sudden I feared this power. I no longer saw innocence in being called angel by strangers.

Stranger danger.

So what did it mean? To bring life and thus because my body can create it I am obliged to protect it, yes.

Woman, the word does no justice to who we are. We are without men many times brave.

Woman, an expression of life covered with love and generosity.

An opportunity to educate the future on compassion.

A being of energy that aligns with the moon.

Woman, a person, with fear to say no to men.

A person who dreams for a safe world. 

A person who dreams to be heard in a room for her voice, not her looks.

Woman beyond beautiful! We think, we feel, we dream, but mostly we love.

I love to love life and express myself, I am freedom of expression.

I am proud to be a woman today that knows that being a woman means changing this word.

[pareidoli0]

My luck was my taste

Ouch,

A weight in my core,

The tension of silence.

As I hear the owls pass,

I feel my heart cracking.

To sit down with sorrow,

To write to find light,

In the darkness.

It’s been a month over a year,

Where depression entered mine and around.

Sometimes I would hide under my bed hoping everyone who loves me would forget.

Depression makes you a terrible friend.

Teacher to master self friendship.

To sum up the tales, a broken mind broke my heart.

A broken heart took me away from the sun, I ended where I started, except this time I was a prisoner of the desire to create a family I lost, with an abusive narcissist.

Jealousy, threats and broken doors.

At that point I had feared one before, add one more, 2.

2 times my safety had been violated.

So away I went again,

I have nothing against leaving,

Again and again.

The beauty of the gypsy is to find strength in the unknown city landscapes.

Like a cat,

Another life.

Like a bat,

Another blind forest to navigate.

Yes, solitude hates company .

How could I start a company inside a green eating machine.

Make green with a green conscious system. But I felt weakened. I felt cold and isolated amongst a million green eating zombies.

Sex led to attachment, and attachment led to de attachment.

My luck was my taste and I learned of rich beautiful men only bitter taste came.

I learned not to live with anarchists.

I learned that I wanted to learn about feminism.

I learned to learn of silence.

Abandon the beauty ship,

Abandon the macho ship.

Decided to shift to search for value.

I quit fast fashion and devoted my time to brilliant minds who jumped up from the pages to inspire.

I quit drugs on the regular.

I quit God as male.

To the roots, deep and under to orient the spirit and align the purpose.

A week into my mother jungle I met another stranger disguised as an angel.

Love to me is a first sight.

Devoted too quickly protecting the dream to grow together.

Vegetarians bring out my emotional slut.

Black the night,

Black the memory.

It all got so dark.

Another love broken by substance,

Illusion meets expectation then meets misconceptions of poor communication.

A radical mind in disbelief of female abuse.

A man who does not carry a rack of double Ds knows not of being cornered.

And of the silver lining?

This poem and a movie of the myths behind sexual abuse.

In the dark we create.

Fuck this tabu culture, silence permits defeat.

And I shall not be defeated and we shall not stay quiet.

He closed the chapter with me through a friend, I could describe you many synonyms of coward.

Or I could go onwards to analyze the reptilian mind.

A grown man attached to his mom’s chest calling a woman who shows her breasts to hear his breath . Crazy.

Scary conversations beyond ego could heal us.

How weary to end love with blocking.

But I loved and so I thank, the time shared and even in tears, I attempt to remember him smiling.

I wonder if true love will come back again,

I wonder if I’ll be ready then.

For now sobriety defends my safety .

3.

Caved in thought for the only reptilian mind I will puzzle is my own.

To conclusion: I am not a victim but a soldier for equality.

Hello to the silence.

Hello to the poetry stalkers.

Do you write to the ghosts?

Do you pray to the spirits?

To go through it, to release it.

To accept it.

To feel it.

True love.

Is the love to understand human nature.

Ouch, this life.

Guiding me to surf the gray zones.

Oh how much more I love knowing we all suffer.

[pareidoli0]

Black

Black,

A serpent may not repent.

Of vitality, the air asficciates.

Lying over shivering memories,

Of Black.

A body aching, an ego shattered.

A soul found at the bottom of a lake.

Drowning alcohol, dark waters.

Who would believe? A slivering snake dressed like a prince.

A man made of just desire.

For her curse was disguised as charm.

And her fault was trust.

Awake and in fear, where am I?

Why am I naked?

Who was here?

Blue.

Fear of betraying your love,

A rage only misfortune knows.

When some feel panick they attack,

Maybe I was a weaker one,

Maybe I was cursed with an aura of sex.

I froze and the snake came.

Blood Clatt.

Red.

Like a dirty dog pushed to roam streets,

The ride home was blurry.

Techno held my ears.

I walked up to hear my baby crying, she had missed me.

Black then Green.

Green the plant who soothes the broken.

Green helped me sleep.

I slept what felt like an hour turned to a day. Time needed to be gone.

God? God wasn’t there.

All that was here, was guilt.

I showered an eternity to wash invisible dirt.

Sabotage broke up with the man I love.

How could he love a woman like me.

A used woman.

Black take me back and drop me home.

[pareidoli0]

[pareidoli0]

[pareidoli0]

Oops I fell into black on black,

Left dark lipstick  on her neck, and fork.

No  jacket no umbrella, under the stars I felt like black pepper.

I think I sold my soul to a techno song,

Faithful diesel keeping me through the week.

I was hopeless and it gave me purpose.

Was I late ?

He challenged me at the door, told me nothing could taste the same.

Broke my heart around town, to reconcile underground.

And now it was all sound.

When I fall in love

http://archives.ckut.ca/64/20170906.22.00-23.00.mp3

[pareidoli0]

He brave be brace

The boundaries of society are set by predetermined judgement I too felt disciplined to underestimate those that grew less fortunate What an idiot I was to push away lessons The lesson was to listen openly and lovingly For the day a man that earned a tenth of my salary Sat me down to share his food and talk about a joy I couldn't buy with my card full of money I saw that the recent we lived in Colombia Was fired by fire to protect the oligarchy I would leave that island learning if I had been given the chance to live lavishly This meant responsibility! For with knowledge comes the ability to solve social problematics Wisdom said knowledge was power some politicians followed the KISS mentality some are here doubting Closing their ears to the shouting Counting losses even creating them to lower taxation Oil and currency implementation But as long as I breath the revolution in me persists They tell me tax cannot be avoided But then I read about open seas Not for ideals of communism that was utopia Not with dictator ambitions those were ego But with serenity in mind Eternal inner balance in combustion That all my actions will be guided for what analytically I perceive as good. For so long I questioned what good and bad meant This current obsession with positive and negative vibes as if occurrences came with a plus sign some things just are Some things don't reveal the impact other than with linear passing of time. born into chance born to be held Who holds us? Mother Mother Earth Mother of compassion The land where we can free dance in coexistence. by your hand let your fingers be gentle A touch be beyond midas A hand of a healer Vain in pain Faith for fair tomorrow Where we all can achieve to be ourselves In our purest and most beautiful form United in harmony The winning definition of Good the benefit for the majority But we are lonely islands of minorities Alone Alone All one No one to trust with forever Too dark and deep to share my clever They don't care they don't care I ran away From bad habits Blamed the night Blamed the money Guilty was never my favourite feeling So I ran towards liberty Blaming is lame Be brave be brace How far and long can I run? Running from ghosts Competing with thyself I won't know time will tell All is well for now... The goals are set And it ain't jet set It's not about wealth It's about sharing health A race of no race where we win when we embrace

[pareidoli0]

Lust to dust

He keeps calling at 2 in the morning From booty calls to apologies He knows well when I walk He is left with just talk Of how good I was to him

Shined bright universe light within routine In mind that was only my duty To share what in between love and life I stared, suffered and understood Return to you What I receive

I apologized for losing myself in him This cyber invades and the hacks are cracked To hurt thyself with truths of the needs Attention whores, Gore sold as gold

And in between I and purpose Lied lies and life’s crossings Lazy dependency Challenged to get down from the high Addicted to the sky Addicted to the pain I regret the time wasted But nothing is really wasted when it tasted so sweet For what was is, Delicious Illusions We were lovers craving freedom Fresh To create

Now you come back promising a new track Blocking each other like wack It wasn’t what you did it was how What matters now is growth I moved away in search of greener days And here I am building new discipline

Yet when I hear you, I still smile For I see in you what i dream in me. You always had a way to inspire

But truth be told I’m still done with you I don’t have time to trust you We are misbehaved friends We are lust, We are dust.

By Ío Shyama

[pareidoli0]

For I was born from love and held life by dreaming, I spent my time thinking of ideas that kept us feeling, Researching within nature to discover the mechanics of movement, Transitional forms. Moments so special as the hearts that beat in that tic toc. Grooving in change, dancing under the moonlight. But mostly, Smiling at you, so you know that I accept you as you are, as you come, and as you go. For I am here in constant reconstruction. Following peaceful reaction 

[pareidoli0]

“A human being is part of a whole, called by us the ‘Universe’ —a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts, and feelings, as something separated from the rest—a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.” Albert Einstein says it best.

Einstein

[pareidoli0]

When I look at water, I am reminded that purity is magical. I see it and I learn to flow, for it starts with what passed and ends with what will come yet all it has is the present presents. It connects us, creates us, and we must protect it. When we swim in water, what keeps us from drowning is letting go, relaxing, and when we dive in water, well there is nothing better, for we loose ego and gain courage, oneness with nature under pressure.  "Water is the driving force of all nature." Da Vinci says it best.

[pareidoli0]

The Mask You Live In - Trailer

From the team behind Miss Representation. Coming in 2014, an exploration of American masculinity. http://facebook.com/themaskyoulivein

The masculine identity is raised by a desensitized ethical perspective. Sons of Capitalism and followers of woman objectification, to man up, to human up you must connect to your emotions. As a woman it is hard to date so many men so scared to feel. My dad Camilo Gómez Durán identified himself as a feminist, and for years I judged for my eyes were blinded my trends where men, had a role of strength, and us woman had a role of beauty. As I grow more into my skin and deeper into a consumerist- quo- system- culture, I see the urgent need for my father's work, to change this gender idealism at root, at childhood. He plans on doing a documentary where all gender inequality issues are addressed proposing educational strategies to combat them. I desperately dream of living in a world of gender equality, where woman are encouraged to be intellectuals who worry less of their image, where men can be hugged and can say I am sad without being seen as weak, where domestic violence, and human trafficking are no longer crimes that frequent our court rooms.   But the process starts within, freeing our own minds from the media-tic  idealism of beauty, power, and the flash life, something that far too often we fall victims of. Support those who have the courage to change the world, keep that revolutionist in your heart alive, active.

[pareidoli0]

Living is the art of loving. Loving is the art of caring. Caring is the art of sharing. Sharing is the art of living. If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.

  Booker Washington

[pareidoli0]

Some will try to dim your light, because you shine too bright in their eyes. Let them, you know your sparkle comes from core, and if you love right that will stay golden .