Okay, so here is my official post. It is really difficult for me to do this. Today, I was discharged–without warning–from my PHP program AND my psychiatrist. I am supposed to start treatment at an ED Clinic once my insurance approves a single case agreement. Once that happens (the clinic said maybe a few weeks), medicaid will cover the Intensive Outpatient Program (hopefully), but I will have to commute by car for two hours Monday through Friday, which will cost a lot in gas. My therapist (Carl) has encouraged me to go ahead and make this post because he said if I cannot get into treatment at the ED Clinic, he will have to refer out because he has no experience treating eating disorders. I think I have become a liability and CB says that is probably why the hospital and my psychiatrist discharged me today. They did not even tell the rest of my treatment team (my therapist, CB, etc) that they were discharging. They just did it.
The hospital has been telling me for quite some time now that I am going to die without treatment (this particular hospital that I have been at does not treat EDs) because the Anorexia has progressed so rapidly and is severe. I would give an example, but I do not want to trigger anyone with this post and I want it to be recovery oriented. The ONLY ED clinic in my state is the one that I have been referred to. On Friday, at my assessment, they even mentioned possibly putting me inpatient for the ED in another state. As of today, they are trying to get me approved through medicaid for intensive outpatient (the Monday through Friday thing). If they DO end up putting me inpatient, I will find a way to let you all know so that donations can be paused.
My mom originally said she would help with one tank of gas per week, but has since told me that she is not going to help. She is not very dependable and she is abusive, as reported by the hospital more than once. I am relying on my friends here to please, please, PLEASE help me. I am so devastated beyond words with what happened today and the last thing I want to do is resort to begging for help but, here I am.
Even on a reduced sliding fee scale, I will have to pay $25 per session, plus the cost of gas to get to and from the clinic. Once insurance (hopefully) approves the intensive outpatient, I will be paying for just gas every day to get there and back home.
I love to paint and I have a new art notebook full of watercolor paper (but honestly, I use acrylic and water both) and I would love to paint you a quote in exchange for a donation if you want. I really am not good at painting anything other than quotes but I am pretty good at that, I think.
It would really mean a lot to me if you would please, please donate and then if you do want a painting (on the art paper), please just message me and I will get it to you. I am in desperate need. Anorexia has taken over my life and I am scared.
My Venmo name is Grace-in-recovery
I have everything set to private, so transactions are not going to be visible to the public (unless you want them to be and then Venmo says I can change the privacy settings?).
Below is a recent painting that I did in my art book!
