i wish i was a jellyfish

[lifeafterpsychiatry]

"Is it normal to-" Doesn't matter. Do it weird if it isn't hurting anyone

[alexander]

subway employees when i tell them i want a sub:

[world-heritage-posts]

world heritage post

[997]

[swiminjello]

ooo…. lady gagita

[smoqueen-deactivated20251108]

does anyone know if you can get in trouble for feeling weird

[faggottt]

90% of my day is me being nervous

[zooophagous]

Earlier I was scrolling Reddit and I come across a post in r/shrooms, a sub reddit dedicated to psychadelic mushrooms and frequently featuring entries from users who are posting during a trip.

A guy posts, freaking out, that the delivery person who dropped off his food had a huge snake wrapped around his neck and the snake was talking to him and tripped him out.

He shares a picture ne sneakily took of the delivery driver.

The delivery driver actually does, in fact, have a live 7 or so foot long boa constrictor draped across his shoulders.

Can you fucking image. Being blasted out of your gourd on hallucinogenic substances, getting a random knock at the door and the guy has a live gigantic snake just chilling. Your head would explode

[furiousgoldfish]

Dealing with my fear of rejection by never asking for anything, and my fear of being a burden by never doing anything that involves other people. Foolproof.

[dankmemeuniversity]

[caralarm-bicycles]

You can really sense the tumblr userbase aging

[todaysbird]

when i was 9 i was banned from editing the muscovy duck wikipedia page because i kept editing any mention of the flavor of their meat to say things like “they taste like dirty dishwater” because i had pet muscovy ducks and couldn’t bear the thought of them being eaten, so i tried to run a smear campaign on duck meat

[stuckinapril]

don’t be a stranger! (please linger near the door uncomfortably instead of just leaving. please forget your scarf in my life and come back later for it)

[ruinedchildhood]

[sacred-portal]

[tangledbeast]

If it makes you feel any better, he hated it too.

[gayserblast]

This is the funniest and saddest sentence I've read all week

[medievalthymes]

bro your whimsy. you forgot your fucking whimsy. your solemn and somber attitude is scaring the hoes

[dyrdeer]

Why are streaming services these days all named shit like Fubi and Hehu and lala

[dyrdeer]

like what do these words mean 😭

[dyrdeer]

what the fuck is happening

[mousegard]

[blackbelles-world]

[niixell]

[samtheviking]

Both of these

[whitmerule]

[the-bafflement-of-scotland-yard]

I’m sorry, it had to be added

[aquilacalvitium]

Every single discussion about a good villain/hero dynamic ALWAYS comes back to these two

[sioltach]

[heycollage]

@onenicebugperday

[jeanjauthor]

"My deity has been spending much more time with me... He has given me food, water, shelter, things to chase and things to bite, a paradise to explore and be safe within... I sense my time is drawing near, and I am comforted by the presence of my deity. They sense my end is drawing near, and they show me how they, too, bite into their prey. Together, we share a holy meal of understanding, between my small self, and their colossal, incomprehensible, mostly unknowable existence.

"Perhaps we aren't all that different from the gods...and as my life draws to a close, I find that thought comforting.

[quaculaarchive]

tje original pic of this was of him holding a bleach bottle and i said hmm. thats not safe for ducky to drink so i put a nice tastey baja balst instead

[1337n00b-deactivated20210119]

this is really good I love Donal Duck and I love baja blast so basically great post