mun here! this is a ribbit blog (duh). they use they/them and she/her (if you saw he/him.. shshsh no you didn't). a minor runs this blog, so be mindful of that. i will not do nsfw roleplays and i never roleplay in dms.
you can ship ribbit with whoever you want! i will do ship roleplays but again no nsfw. you can roleplay with her before or after they abstracted (as in she's haunting your character). roleplays with OC's are allowed but please be aware she will have no idea who you are.
age is around 20-25 for them i haven't decided yet. if you are roleplaying with them after they abstracted then she will very likely have mood swings as she is unstable.
It’s crazy that her character flaw is thinking that if she ever expresses a negative emotion everyone will dislike her and yall immediately proved her right. Goddamn.
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
The warmth, the calm. He was inches away once again. So close to freedom- Jax?
It snaps him back, his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer, his brain ripping apart, and his eyes in a bright blurr. It all lasts for only a moment, but when it ends is when the irritation starts. The anger. Its almost blinding, causing him to storm to his door and swinging it open. Unaware the tears staining his face once he's in front of Ribbit.
Ribbit subconsciously steps back when the door is swung open. Her first instinct is to bite back, but that's never worked out well for either of them. She steels herself with a deep breath, letting her arms hang by her side.
“I was just coming to make sure you were okay.” She mutters, raising an eyebrow in confusion at the outburst. And the tears. And the- well, everything.
Jax felt himself shake, and was glad most of him was covered by the dark of his room. He stares at Ribbit as a new sudden wave of guilt hits him all at once. It makes him wince and look away.
"I'm... great." He mutters through his teeth, his tone dialed down now. "You guys really need to stop worrying about me. Just... go."
“Wh- I'm not just gonna go.” Ribbit snaps, holding the door before Jax even has a chance to try shut it. They miss their friend, and they're tired of talking to themself. “You literally just screamed at me for knocking. You're not ‘great’.”
She hesitates, before pulling on the door firmly. “Let me in.”
Jax doesn't speak at first, only letting Ribbit give him an ear full. But once the tension on the door favors Ribbit's hand, it makes him tense up again.
"Stop!" He presses back, not enough to slam on Ribbit, but enough to keep it where it was. "I don't need to be coddled and looked after! Like, come on, the others probably love it! Just let it happen!"
His eyes now staring into hers, pupils shorter and perhaps even a little scribbled. "I've hurt you, I've hurt Kaufmo, I've hurt Pomni and Ragatha and Gangle and god knows who else! Just let me go!"
Ribbit pulls on the door again, slowly getting more frustrated and slightly desperate. They have a sneaking suspicion that they know what's going on, and it does absolutely nothing to make them want to leave. It just makes them more desperate to stay.
“Let you go? Go where?” She asks, trying to wedge herself in the doorway. She knows. She wants to be wrong, but she knows she isn't. She just wants to hear him admit to it.
He lets out a weak laugh, his grin turning weaker and forced as the tears slowly come back. "Where else?! Where I should have went from the f%$#ing beginning!"
His yells only grew louder, more desperate in itself. He tried to keep the door from opening any further, from letting Ribbit it. But his flooded emotions made his strength seem far less intense. He took a step back, but still tried to keep Ribbit out. "Where I should have went instead of you and Kaufmo!"
A sob hitches in his throat, catching his breath in his chest. "I can't... Ribbit, I can't..."
Ribbit makes a frustrated noise as Jax keeps fighting her, but she pauses at the admission, standing still in the doorway. She stays quiet for a few moments, listening quietly and wondering to herself, how did we get here?
“Jax..” They start, gently tugging on the door. She hasn't got it in her to be angry anymore. In fact, she's just scared. They've never been good at being the emotional support, and they know that they simply can't mess this up. She doesn't want to be alone.
Jax stares back, tears stinging his eyes and wetting the floor around him. His breath hitches again, causing a hiccup before he collapses to his knees, completely given up keeping ribbit out.
His breath began to hyperventilate and his body shaking much more violently. Hands now rushing to hold his own head, as if in any way it would stop the spinning thoughts. "I-I-I c-can't, I can't d-do this! I can't keep doing this!"
Ribbit slides into the room and closes the door as soon as she can. They want to go over and help, but seeing their friend like this makes their own eyes burn a little. She bites her lip and looks away, trying to keep herself calm before she approaches.
They take a few shaky steps closer, unsure of what to say. Instead, she just guides the rabbit's head against her chest, resting her chin between his ears.
“I'm sorry, bunny..” They mumble, because what else can they say? All they wanted to hear when this happened to them was a sorry.
He does stop the hands guiding him, he doesn't stop the arms now around around his body, only continuing his sobs that now had no way back inside. And the words only made the last but of wall crumble into dust.
Did he even deserve a sorry? Did he deserve such care and love? The voices in his head screamed no, while his guilt of existing could only agree with them. It makes his sobs break harder, forcing all his weight down into Ribbit's chest.
"Ribs.... Ribs I'm sorry! I can't even say it to him! I- god!"
Ribbit shuts her eyes tight, breathing deeply to keep herself composed. She can feel his tears against her, and it just breaks her heart even more. They squeeze the rabbit in their arms.
“I know, I know you're sorry. It's..” She trails off, hesitating. She can't say that it's okay. It's not. “I'm sorry it has to be this way.”
They sigh softly, deciding to try and wait the tears out. Maybe that'll help. She hopes it does, because it's all she can think to do right now.
The hesitation, he knows they can't accept his apologies. He knows he can never make it better, no matter how many times he tries. The damage was there, and despite returning, it was still forever. They'd never be the same, the way they'd goof around or cause pranks on others. The way everything felt right. It would never be the same since that day.
The tears don't stop, but they calm enough to settle down. He gently places a palm against Ribbit, and pushes them away carefully. He doesn't meet her eyes, he couldn't.
The silence swallows them for minutes, dragging out far too long for his comfort. His arms hold each other, while his eyes remain on the floor.
"I know you can't forgive me. I know you can't... I know we can never be as close as before. I don't even know if you like being around anymore, or if its just familiar at this point..." he finally speaks, but his voice is quieter. Softer. "So why do you care so much... if I want to take your place, Ribbit?"
Ribbit almost protests when she's pushed away, but she decides to stay quiet and listen instead. Their hands hang limply by their sides, and their eyes don't leave the rabbit, listening intently.
“Because I still care about you.” She answers once he's finished. She sighs and sits down, folding her hands on her lap. She can't believe they've made it this far without a conversation like this. They'd laugh if it were a different situation.
“Yeah, you said some really horrible things, but it was only a coincidence that I just.. wasn't doing well at all when you said them. And, no, it doesn't excuse it, and things have changed, but it doesn't just- erase everything good we had. It's still there. And I really, really wish I could just put it all past us and make things normal again, but I can't.”
They pause for a moment, before continuing quietly. “.. I don't want you to die, Carrots. I really, really don't.”
Jax listens, as much as he didnt want to hear the words. They were both reassuring, and terribly heart breaking. Not like he wasn't seeing it coming, though still kinder than he'd expect.
"I could be a jerk at times in the real world... I know that all too much, but... but I was never like this. I never made the same life altering mistakes, I'd step away when things got too much I-" he pauses, then sighs while closing his eyes. "I feel so, so trapped Ribbit. Like I'm cornered and I'm... I'm so scared." His words grew into whispers as he trails off.
"And now, even though I'm so so happy you're back, every time I see you I just... I feel like my gut gets punched with guilt every time..."
Ribbit listens quietly, tentatively leaning her head on her friend's shoulder. They hate this place for doing this to them. She really wishes she could exist without being a reminder of everything they've lost.
“I know. This place doesn't give us any time to breathe, huh?” They let out a quiet, bitter chuckle, hugging themself. “It's not your fault that you can't cope. I mean, it doesn't make things okay.. but I get it. We're basically in Hell. Of course things aren't going to be pretty.”
She shudders, swallowing down her tears. It doesn't work. “Please, Jax. Please let me help you. I don't- I can't lose you. You're my best friend.”
Jax breaks again hearing Ribbits words. He leans forward toward the floor, sobbing harder than he's had in a very long time. He screams and sobs to himself before turning to Ribbit finally, and fell into their arms instead.
He sobs, this time with no words. They cry together, until there was no energy left for Jax to cry. Then, he sits there in his friend's arms until the quiet grew deafening. Only then he'd tear himself away. Still exhausted, still looking deeply ashamed, but the air felt lighter. A lot lighter.
Jax stares at the floor one last time, taking a long breath in before finally meeting Ribbit's. The circles under eyes own deep and dark, but his pupils were steady and back to straight. He gives a weak smile, and gently pushes Ribbit's shoulder.
"Not the first time we've had a break down on this floor huh? Wouldn't say this bad but... weird that it keeps happening."
Ribbit lets out a choked, hysterical giggle, scrubbing at one of her eyes. This poor bedroom floor has seen a lot. “Yeah.. I think we're long overdue a breakdown, though. I've been needing this for weeks.”
She flops down onto her back and stares at the stars on the ceiling, relaxing a little more. The whole thing has left them feeling a little shaky and oddly giddy, though that's just what you get when you let so many feelings out, they guess.
They sigh quietly. “I bet Kaufy is laughing at us from the cellar.”
Jax layed down beside the other, stretching out their limbs as he let his emotions settled back to calm. He needed that, despite never wanting it. He needed that out there.
He lays with Ribbit, letting the silence grow from deafening, to comforting. The mention of Kaufmo made his chest sting, but part of him felt thats just how it'll be from now on.
"You know, I actually miss his terrible jokes." Jax grins a little while his eyes scan designs in the stars. It brings him back, to times the three of them did this for no reason. "Some of them were so bad it made them funny."
Ribbit snorts softly. “Honestly, half the time I didn't even know what he was on about. He'd say something and I'd never be able to tell if he was being stupid on purpose or if he genuinely didn't know how jokes worked. That was the fun of it though, I guess..”
They go quiet for a while, simply staring at the stars. She wishes she got a chance to say goodbye to him. She wishes she got a chance to say goodbye in general.
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
The warmth, the calm. He was inches away once again. So close to freedom- Jax?
It snaps him back, his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer, his brain ripping apart, and his eyes in a bright blurr. It all lasts for only a moment, but when it ends is when the irritation starts. The anger. Its almost blinding, causing him to storm to his door and swinging it open. Unaware the tears staining his face once he's in front of Ribbit.
Ribbit subconsciously steps back when the door is swung open. Her first instinct is to bite back, but that's never worked out well for either of them. She steels herself with a deep breath, letting her arms hang by her side.
“I was just coming to make sure you were okay.” She mutters, raising an eyebrow in confusion at the outburst. And the tears. And the- well, everything.
Jax felt himself shake, and was glad most of him was covered by the dark of his room. He stares at Ribbit as a new sudden wave of guilt hits him all at once. It makes him wince and look away.
"I'm... great." He mutters through his teeth, his tone dialed down now. "You guys really need to stop worrying about me. Just... go."
“Wh- I'm not just gonna go.” Ribbit snaps, holding the door before Jax even has a chance to try shut it. They miss their friend, and they're tired of talking to themself. “You literally just screamed at me for knocking. You're not ‘great’.”
She hesitates, before pulling on the door firmly. “Let me in.”
Jax doesn't speak at first, only letting Ribbit give him an ear full. But once the tension on the door favors Ribbit's hand, it makes him tense up again.
"Stop!" He presses back, not enough to slam on Ribbit, but enough to keep it where it was. "I don't need to be coddled and looked after! Like, come on, the others probably love it! Just let it happen!"
His eyes now staring into hers, pupils shorter and perhaps even a little scribbled. "I've hurt you, I've hurt Kaufmo, I've hurt Pomni and Ragatha and Gangle and god knows who else! Just let me go!"
Ribbit pulls on the door again, slowly getting more frustrated and slightly desperate. They have a sneaking suspicion that they know what's going on, and it does absolutely nothing to make them want to leave. It just makes them more desperate to stay.
“Let you go? Go where?” She asks, trying to wedge herself in the doorway. She knows. She wants to be wrong, but she knows she isn't. She just wants to hear him admit to it.
He lets out a weak laugh, his grin turning weaker and forced as the tears slowly come back. "Where else?! Where I should have went from the f%$#ing beginning!"
His yells only grew louder, more desperate in itself. He tried to keep the door from opening any further, from letting Ribbit it. But his flooded emotions made his strength seem far less intense. He took a step back, but still tried to keep Ribbit out. "Where I should have went instead of you and Kaufmo!"
A sob hitches in his throat, catching his breath in his chest. "I can't... Ribbit, I can't..."
Ribbit makes a frustrated noise as Jax keeps fighting her, but she pauses at the admission, standing still in the doorway. She stays quiet for a few moments, listening quietly and wondering to herself, how did we get here?
“Jax..” They start, gently tugging on the door. She hasn't got it in her to be angry anymore. In fact, she's just scared. They've never been good at being the emotional support, and they know that they simply can't mess this up. She doesn't want to be alone.
Jax stares back, tears stinging his eyes and wetting the floor around him. His breath hitches again, causing a hiccup before he collapses to his knees, completely given up keeping ribbit out.
His breath began to hyperventilate and his body shaking much more violently. Hands now rushing to hold his own head, as if in any way it would stop the spinning thoughts. "I-I-I c-can't, I can't d-do this! I can't keep doing this!"
Ribbit slides into the room and closes the door as soon as she can. They want to go over and help, but seeing their friend like this makes their own eyes burn a little. She bites her lip and looks away, trying to keep herself calm before she approaches.
They take a few shaky steps closer, unsure of what to say. Instead, she just guides the rabbit's head against her chest, resting her chin between his ears.
“I'm sorry, bunny..” They mumble, because what else can they say? All they wanted to hear when this happened to them was a sorry.
He does stop the hands guiding him, he doesn't stop the arms now around around his body, only continuing his sobs that now had no way back inside. And the words only made the last but of wall crumble into dust.
Did he even deserve a sorry? Did he deserve such care and love? The voices in his head screamed no, while his guilt of existing could only agree with them. It makes his sobs break harder, forcing all his weight down into Ribbit's chest.
"Ribs.... Ribs I'm sorry! I can't even say it to him! I- god!"
Ribbit shuts her eyes tight, breathing deeply to keep herself composed. She can feel his tears against her, and it just breaks her heart even more. They squeeze the rabbit in their arms.
“I know, I know you're sorry. It's..” She trails off, hesitating. She can't say that it's okay. It's not. “I'm sorry it has to be this way.”
They sigh softly, deciding to try and wait the tears out. Maybe that'll help. She hopes it does, because it's all she can think to do right now.
The hesitation, he knows they can't accept his apologies. He knows he can never make it better, no matter how many times he tries. The damage was there, and despite returning, it was still forever. They'd never be the same, the way they'd goof around or cause pranks on others. The way everything felt right. It would never be the same since that day.
The tears don't stop, but they calm enough to settle down. He gently places a palm against Ribbit, and pushes them away carefully. He doesn't meet her eyes, he couldn't.
The silence swallows them for minutes, dragging out far too long for his comfort. His arms hold each other, while his eyes remain on the floor.
"I know you can't forgive me. I know you can't... I know we can never be as close as before. I don't even know if you like being around anymore, or if its just familiar at this point..." he finally speaks, but his voice is quieter. Softer. "So why do you care so much... if I want to take your place, Ribbit?"
Ribbit almost protests when she's pushed away, but she decides to stay quiet and listen instead. Their hands hang limply by their sides, and their eyes don't leave the rabbit, listening intently.
“Because I still care about you.” She answers once he's finished. She sighs and sits down, folding her hands on her lap. She can't believe they've made it this far without a conversation like this. They'd laugh if it were a different situation.
“Yeah, you said some really horrible things, but it was only a coincidence that I just.. wasn't doing well at all when you said them. And, no, it doesn't excuse it, and things have changed, but it doesn't just- erase everything good we had. It's still there. And I really, really wish I could just put it all past us and make things normal again, but I can't.”
They pause for a moment, before continuing quietly. “.. I don't want you to die, Carrots. I really, really don't.”
Jax listens, as much as he didnt want to hear the words. They were both reassuring, and terribly heart breaking. Not like he wasn't seeing it coming, though still kinder than he'd expect.
"I could be a jerk at times in the real world... I know that all too much, but... but I was never like this. I never made the same life altering mistakes, I'd step away when things got too much I-" he pauses, then sighs while closing his eyes. "I feel so, so trapped Ribbit. Like I'm cornered and I'm... I'm so scared." His words grew into whispers as he trails off.
"And now, even though I'm so so happy you're back, every time I see you I just... I feel like my gut gets punched with guilt every time..."
Ribbit listens quietly, tentatively leaning her head on her friend's shoulder. They hate this place for doing this to them. She really wishes she could exist without being a reminder of everything they've lost.
“I know. This place doesn't give us any time to breathe, huh?” They let out a quiet, bitter chuckle, hugging themself. “It's not your fault that you can't cope. I mean, it doesn't make things okay.. but I get it. We're basically in Hell. Of course things aren't going to be pretty.”
She shudders, swallowing down her tears. It doesn't work. “Please, Jax. Please let me help you. I don't- I can't lose you. You're my best friend.”
Jax breaks again hearing Ribbits words. He leans forward toward the floor, sobbing harder than he's had in a very long time. He screams and sobs to himself before turning to Ribbit finally, and fell into their arms instead.
He sobs, this time with no words. They cry together, until there was no energy left for Jax to cry. Then, he sits there in his friend's arms until the quiet grew deafening. Only then he'd tear himself away. Still exhausted, still looking deeply ashamed, but the air felt lighter. A lot lighter.
Jax stares at the floor one last time, taking a long breath in before finally meeting Ribbit's. The circles under eyes own deep and dark, but his pupils were steady and back to straight. He gives a weak smile, and gently pushes Ribbit's shoulder.
"Not the first time we've had a break down on this floor huh? Wouldn't say this bad but... weird that it keeps happening."
Ribbit lets out a choked, hysterical giggle, scrubbing at one of her eyes. This poor bedroom floor has seen a lot. “Yeah.. I think we're long overdue a breakdown, though. I've been needing this for weeks.”
She flops down onto her back and stares at the stars on the ceiling, relaxing a little more. The whole thing has left them feeling a little shaky and oddly giddy, though that's just what you get when you let so many feelings out, they guess.
They sigh quietly. “I bet Kaufy is laughing at us from the cellar.”
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
The warmth, the calm. He was inches away once again. So close to freedom- Jax?
It snaps him back, his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer, his brain ripping apart, and his eyes in a bright blurr. It all lasts for only a moment, but when it ends is when the irritation starts. The anger. Its almost blinding, causing him to storm to his door and swinging it open. Unaware the tears staining his face once he's in front of Ribbit.
Ribbit subconsciously steps back when the door is swung open. Her first instinct is to bite back, but that's never worked out well for either of them. She steels herself with a deep breath, letting her arms hang by her side.
“I was just coming to make sure you were okay.” She mutters, raising an eyebrow in confusion at the outburst. And the tears. And the- well, everything.
Jax felt himself shake, and was glad most of him was covered by the dark of his room. He stares at Ribbit as a new sudden wave of guilt hits him all at once. It makes him wince and look away.
"I'm... great." He mutters through his teeth, his tone dialed down now. "You guys really need to stop worrying about me. Just... go."
“Wh- I'm not just gonna go.” Ribbit snaps, holding the door before Jax even has a chance to try shut it. They miss their friend, and they're tired of talking to themself. “You literally just screamed at me for knocking. You're not ‘great’.”
She hesitates, before pulling on the door firmly. “Let me in.”
Jax doesn't speak at first, only letting Ribbit give him an ear full. But once the tension on the door favors Ribbit's hand, it makes him tense up again.
"Stop!" He presses back, not enough to slam on Ribbit, but enough to keep it where it was. "I don't need to be coddled and looked after! Like, come on, the others probably love it! Just let it happen!"
His eyes now staring into hers, pupils shorter and perhaps even a little scribbled. "I've hurt you, I've hurt Kaufmo, I've hurt Pomni and Ragatha and Gangle and god knows who else! Just let me go!"
Ribbit pulls on the door again, slowly getting more frustrated and slightly desperate. They have a sneaking suspicion that they know what's going on, and it does absolutely nothing to make them want to leave. It just makes them more desperate to stay.
“Let you go? Go where?” She asks, trying to wedge herself in the doorway. She knows. She wants to be wrong, but she knows she isn't. She just wants to hear him admit to it.
He lets out a weak laugh, his grin turning weaker and forced as the tears slowly come back. "Where else?! Where I should have went from the f%$#ing beginning!"
His yells only grew louder, more desperate in itself. He tried to keep the door from opening any further, from letting Ribbit it. But his flooded emotions made his strength seem far less intense. He took a step back, but still tried to keep Ribbit out. "Where I should have went instead of you and Kaufmo!"
A sob hitches in his throat, catching his breath in his chest. "I can't... Ribbit, I can't..."
Ribbit makes a frustrated noise as Jax keeps fighting her, but she pauses at the admission, standing still in the doorway. She stays quiet for a few moments, listening quietly and wondering to herself, how did we get here?
“Jax..” They start, gently tugging on the door. She hasn't got it in her to be angry anymore. In fact, she's just scared. They've never been good at being the emotional support, and they know that they simply can't mess this up. She doesn't want to be alone.
Jax stares back, tears stinging his eyes and wetting the floor around him. His breath hitches again, causing a hiccup before he collapses to his knees, completely given up keeping ribbit out.
His breath began to hyperventilate and his body shaking much more violently. Hands now rushing to hold his own head, as if in any way it would stop the spinning thoughts. "I-I-I c-can't, I can't d-do this! I can't keep doing this!"
Ribbit slides into the room and closes the door as soon as she can. They want to go over and help, but seeing their friend like this makes their own eyes burn a little. She bites her lip and looks away, trying to keep herself calm before she approaches.
They take a few shaky steps closer, unsure of what to say. Instead, she just guides the rabbit's head against her chest, resting her chin between his ears.
“I'm sorry, bunny..” They mumble, because what else can they say? All they wanted to hear when this happened to them was a sorry.
He does stop the hands guiding him, he doesn't stop the arms now around around his body, only continuing his sobs that now had no way back inside. And the words only made the last but of wall crumble into dust.
Did he even deserve a sorry? Did he deserve such care and love? The voices in his head screamed no, while his guilt of existing could only agree with them. It makes his sobs break harder, forcing all his weight down into Ribbit's chest.
"Ribs.... Ribs I'm sorry! I can't even say it to him! I- god!"
Ribbit shuts her eyes tight, breathing deeply to keep herself composed. She can feel his tears against her, and it just breaks her heart even more. They squeeze the rabbit in their arms.
“I know, I know you're sorry. It's..” She trails off, hesitating. She can't say that it's okay. It's not. “I'm sorry it has to be this way.”
They sigh softly, deciding to try and wait the tears out. Maybe that'll help. She hopes it does, because it's all she can think to do right now.
The hesitation, he knows they can't accept his apologies. He knows he can never make it better, no matter how many times he tries. The damage was there, and despite returning, it was still forever. They'd never be the same, the way they'd goof around or cause pranks on others. The way everything felt right. It would never be the same since that day.
The tears don't stop, but they calm enough to settle down. He gently places a palm against Ribbit, and pushes them away carefully. He doesn't meet her eyes, he couldn't.
The silence swallows them for minutes, dragging out far too long for his comfort. His arms hold each other, while his eyes remain on the floor.
"I know you can't forgive me. I know you can't... I know we can never be as close as before. I don't even know if you like being around anymore, or if its just familiar at this point..." he finally speaks, but his voice is quieter. Softer. "So why do you care so much... if I want to take your place, Ribbit?"
Ribbit almost protests when she's pushed away, but she decides to stay quiet and listen instead. Their hands hang limply by their sides, and their eyes don't leave the rabbit, listening intently.
“Because I still care about you.” She answers once he's finished. She sighs and sits down, folding her hands on her lap. She can't believe they've made it this far without a conversation like this. They'd laugh if it were a different situation.
“Yeah, you said some really horrible things, but it was only a coincidence that I just.. wasn't doing well at all when you said them. And, no, it doesn't excuse it, and things have changed, but it doesn't just- erase everything good we had. It's still there. And I really, really wish I could just put it all past us and make things normal again, but I can't.”
They pause for a moment, before continuing quietly. “.. I don't want you to die, Carrots. I really, really don't.”
Jax listens, as much as he didnt want to hear the words. They were both reassuring, and terribly heart breaking. Not like he wasn't seeing it coming, though still kinder than he'd expect.
"I could be a jerk at times in the real world... I know that all too much, but... but I was never like this. I never made the same life altering mistakes, I'd step away when things got too much I-" he pauses, then sighs while closing his eyes. "I feel so, so trapped Ribbit. Like I'm cornered and I'm... I'm so scared." His words grew into whispers as he trails off.
"And now, even though I'm so so happy you're back, every time I see you I just... I feel like my gut gets punched with guilt every time..."
Ribbit listens quietly, tentatively leaning her head on her friend's shoulder. They hate this place for doing this to them. She really wishes she could exist without being a reminder of everything they've lost.
“I know. This place doesn't give us any time to breathe, huh?” They let out a quiet, bitter chuckle, hugging themself. “It's not your fault that you can't cope. I mean, it doesn't make things okay.. but I get it. We're basically in Hell. Of course things aren't going to be pretty.”
She shudders, swallowing down her tears. It doesn't work. “Please, Jax. Please let me help you. I don't- I can't lose you. You're my best friend.”
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
The warmth, the calm. He was inches away once again. So close to freedom- Jax?
It snaps him back, his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer, his brain ripping apart, and his eyes in a bright blurr. It all lasts for only a moment, but when it ends is when the irritation starts. The anger. Its almost blinding, causing him to storm to his door and swinging it open. Unaware the tears staining his face once he's in front of Ribbit.
Ribbit subconsciously steps back when the door is swung open. Her first instinct is to bite back, but that's never worked out well for either of them. She steels herself with a deep breath, letting her arms hang by her side.
“I was just coming to make sure you were okay.” She mutters, raising an eyebrow in confusion at the outburst. And the tears. And the- well, everything.
Jax felt himself shake, and was glad most of him was covered by the dark of his room. He stares at Ribbit as a new sudden wave of guilt hits him all at once. It makes him wince and look away.
"I'm... great." He mutters through his teeth, his tone dialed down now. "You guys really need to stop worrying about me. Just... go."
“Wh- I'm not just gonna go.” Ribbit snaps, holding the door before Jax even has a chance to try shut it. They miss their friend, and they're tired of talking to themself. “You literally just screamed at me for knocking. You're not ‘great’.”
She hesitates, before pulling on the door firmly. “Let me in.”
Jax doesn't speak at first, only letting Ribbit give him an ear full. But once the tension on the door favors Ribbit's hand, it makes him tense up again.
"Stop!" He presses back, not enough to slam on Ribbit, but enough to keep it where it was. "I don't need to be coddled and looked after! Like, come on, the others probably love it! Just let it happen!"
His eyes now staring into hers, pupils shorter and perhaps even a little scribbled. "I've hurt you, I've hurt Kaufmo, I've hurt Pomni and Ragatha and Gangle and god knows who else! Just let me go!"
Ribbit pulls on the door again, slowly getting more frustrated and slightly desperate. They have a sneaking suspicion that they know what's going on, and it does absolutely nothing to make them want to leave. It just makes them more desperate to stay.
“Let you go? Go where?” She asks, trying to wedge herself in the doorway. She knows. She wants to be wrong, but she knows she isn't. She just wants to hear him admit to it.
He lets out a weak laugh, his grin turning weaker and forced as the tears slowly come back. "Where else?! Where I should have went from the f%$#ing beginning!"
His yells only grew louder, more desperate in itself. He tried to keep the door from opening any further, from letting Ribbit it. But his flooded emotions made his strength seem far less intense. He took a step back, but still tried to keep Ribbit out. "Where I should have went instead of you and Kaufmo!"
A sob hitches in his throat, catching his breath in his chest. "I can't... Ribbit, I can't..."
Ribbit makes a frustrated noise as Jax keeps fighting her, but she pauses at the admission, standing still in the doorway. She stays quiet for a few moments, listening quietly and wondering to herself, how did we get here?
“Jax..” They start, gently tugging on the door. She hasn't got it in her to be angry anymore. In fact, she's just scared. They've never been good at being the emotional support, and they know that they simply can't mess this up. She doesn't want to be alone.
Jax stares back, tears stinging his eyes and wetting the floor around him. His breath hitches again, causing a hiccup before he collapses to his knees, completely given up keeping ribbit out.
His breath began to hyperventilate and his body shaking much more violently. Hands now rushing to hold his own head, as if in any way it would stop the spinning thoughts. "I-I-I c-can't, I can't d-do this! I can't keep doing this!"
Ribbit slides into the room and closes the door as soon as she can. They want to go over and help, but seeing their friend like this makes their own eyes burn a little. She bites her lip and looks away, trying to keep herself calm before she approaches.
They take a few shaky steps closer, unsure of what to say. Instead, she just guides the rabbit's head against her chest, resting her chin between his ears.
“I'm sorry, bunny..” They mumble, because what else can they say? All they wanted to hear when this happened to them was a sorry.
He does stop the hands guiding him, he doesn't stop the arms now around around his body, only continuing his sobs that now had no way back inside. And the words only made the last but of wall crumble into dust.
Did he even deserve a sorry? Did he deserve such care and love? The voices in his head screamed no, while his guilt of existing could only agree with them. It makes his sobs break harder, forcing all his weight down into Ribbit's chest.
"Ribs.... Ribs I'm sorry! I can't even say it to him! I- god!"
Ribbit shuts her eyes tight, breathing deeply to keep herself composed. She can feel his tears against her, and it just breaks her heart even more. They squeeze the rabbit in their arms.
“I know, I know you're sorry. It's..” She trails off, hesitating. She can't say that it's okay. It's not. “I'm sorry it has to be this way.”
They sigh softly, deciding to try and wait the tears out. Maybe that'll help. She hopes it does, because it's all she can think to do right now.
The hesitation, he knows they can't accept his apologies. He knows he can never make it better, no matter how many times he tries. The damage was there, and despite returning, it was still forever. They'd never be the same, the way they'd goof around or cause pranks on others. The way everything felt right. It would never be the same since that day.
The tears don't stop, but they calm enough to settle down. He gently places a palm against Ribbit, and pushes them away carefully. He doesn't meet her eyes, he couldn't.
The silence swallows them for minutes, dragging out far too long for his comfort. His arms hold each other, while his eyes remain on the floor.
"I know you can't forgive me. I know you can't... I know we can never be as close as before. I don't even know if you like being around anymore, or if its just familiar at this point..." he finally speaks, but his voice is quieter. Softer. "So why do you care so much... if I want to take your place, Ribbit?"
Ribbit almost protests when she's pushed away, but she decides to stay quiet and listen instead. Their hands hang limply by their sides, and their eyes don't leave the rabbit, listening intently.
“Because I still care about you.” She answers once he's finished. She sighs and sits down, folding her hands on her lap. She can't believe they've made it this far without a conversation like this. They'd laugh if it were a different situation.
“Yeah, you said some really horrible things, but it was only a coincidence that I just.. wasn't doing well at all when you said them. And, no, it doesn't excuse it, and things have changed, but it doesn't just- erase everything good we had. It's still there. And I really, really wish I could just put it all past us and make things normal again, but I can't.”
They pause for a moment, before continuing quietly. “.. I don't want you to die, Carrots. I really, really don't.”
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
The warmth, the calm. He was inches away once again. So close to freedom- Jax?
It snaps him back, his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer, his brain ripping apart, and his eyes in a bright blurr. It all lasts for only a moment, but when it ends is when the irritation starts. The anger. Its almost blinding, causing him to storm to his door and swinging it open. Unaware the tears staining his face once he's in front of Ribbit.
Ribbit subconsciously steps back when the door is swung open. Her first instinct is to bite back, but that's never worked out well for either of them. She steels herself with a deep breath, letting her arms hang by her side.
“I was just coming to make sure you were okay.” She mutters, raising an eyebrow in confusion at the outburst. And the tears. And the- well, everything.
Jax felt himself shake, and was glad most of him was covered by the dark of his room. He stares at Ribbit as a new sudden wave of guilt hits him all at once. It makes him wince and look away.
"I'm... great." He mutters through his teeth, his tone dialed down now. "You guys really need to stop worrying about me. Just... go."
“Wh- I'm not just gonna go.” Ribbit snaps, holding the door before Jax even has a chance to try shut it. They miss their friend, and they're tired of talking to themself. “You literally just screamed at me for knocking. You're not ‘great’.”
She hesitates, before pulling on the door firmly. “Let me in.”
Jax doesn't speak at first, only letting Ribbit give him an ear full. But once the tension on the door favors Ribbit's hand, it makes him tense up again.
"Stop!" He presses back, not enough to slam on Ribbit, but enough to keep it where it was. "I don't need to be coddled and looked after! Like, come on, the others probably love it! Just let it happen!"
His eyes now staring into hers, pupils shorter and perhaps even a little scribbled. "I've hurt you, I've hurt Kaufmo, I've hurt Pomni and Ragatha and Gangle and god knows who else! Just let me go!"
Ribbit pulls on the door again, slowly getting more frustrated and slightly desperate. They have a sneaking suspicion that they know what's going on, and it does absolutely nothing to make them want to leave. It just makes them more desperate to stay.
“Let you go? Go where?” She asks, trying to wedge herself in the doorway. She knows. She wants to be wrong, but she knows she isn't. She just wants to hear him admit to it.
He lets out a weak laugh, his grin turning weaker and forced as the tears slowly come back. "Where else?! Where I should have went from the f%$#ing beginning!"
His yells only grew louder, more desperate in itself. He tried to keep the door from opening any further, from letting Ribbit it. But his flooded emotions made his strength seem far less intense. He took a step back, but still tried to keep Ribbit out. "Where I should have went instead of you and Kaufmo!"
A sob hitches in his throat, catching his breath in his chest. "I can't... Ribbit, I can't..."
Ribbit makes a frustrated noise as Jax keeps fighting her, but she pauses at the admission, standing still in the doorway. She stays quiet for a few moments, listening quietly and wondering to herself, how did we get here?
“Jax..” They start, gently tugging on the door. She hasn't got it in her to be angry anymore. In fact, she's just scared. They've never been good at being the emotional support, and they know that they simply can't mess this up. She doesn't want to be alone.
Jax stares back, tears stinging his eyes and wetting the floor around him. His breath hitches again, causing a hiccup before he collapses to his knees, completely given up keeping ribbit out.
His breath began to hyperventilate and his body shaking much more violently. Hands now rushing to hold his own head, as if in any way it would stop the spinning thoughts. "I-I-I c-can't, I can't d-do this! I can't keep doing this!"
Ribbit slides into the room and closes the door as soon as she can. They want to go over and help, but seeing their friend like this makes their own eyes burn a little. She bites her lip and looks away, trying to keep herself calm before she approaches.
They take a few shaky steps closer, unsure of what to say. Instead, she just guides the rabbit's head against her chest, resting her chin between his ears.
“I'm sorry, bunny..” They mumble, because what else can they say? All they wanted to hear when this happened to them was a sorry.
He does stop the hands guiding him, he doesn't stop the arms now around around his body, only continuing his sobs that now had no way back inside. And the words only made the last but of wall crumble into dust.
Did he even deserve a sorry? Did he deserve such care and love? The voices in his head screamed no, while his guilt of existing could only agree with them. It makes his sobs break harder, forcing all his weight down into Ribbit's chest.
"Ribs.... Ribs I'm sorry! I can't even say it to him! I- god!"
Ribbit shuts her eyes tight, breathing deeply to keep herself composed. She can feel his tears against her, and it just breaks her heart even more. They squeeze the rabbit in their arms.
“I know, I know you're sorry. It's..” She trails off, hesitating. She can't say that it's okay. It's not. “I'm sorry it has to be this way.”
They sigh softly, deciding to try and wait the tears out. Maybe that'll help. She hopes it does, because it's all she can think to do right now.
I have a theory that Ribbit and Kaufmo are much older than Jax. And when Jax appeared in the digital circus, he was crying and in great despondency. And it was Ribbit and Kaufmo who pulled him out of this state. Jax considered them not only his close friends but also as an older siblings figure. They both supported Jax, often visited his room, having tea parties, and the three of them had fun in adventures. They even came up with the name of their bond: "Chill Fellas". Ribbit and Kaufmo did everything to distract Jax from terrible memories from real life.
hello tadc bastards. i have spent way too much time on a theory. would you like to hear it?
ive seen people talking abut how pomni is red and blue, and caine is red, and kinger says to cut the blue wire. but theres more than that:
caine: all red. please love me. please stay with me. one blue eye. if he could see what he was doing to them, he would regret it. one green eye. more on that at the end. small details in yellow. more on that at the end.
pomni: half of each. details in yellow. new here. doesnt know what to believe yet.
gangle: red. scared. doesn't want to leave the unknown. "are- are we still gonna be friends, when we're... out there?" but all episode, her blue tears are present on her mask. a little bit of hope for freedom. a better future.
ragatha: mostly blue. her red hair could nod to her hesitancy as a character, but ultimately she wants to get out.
kinger: deep purple. he understands the circus well. blue eyes- he could find the way out, possibly. he thinks better in the dark... where colours dont matter?
jax: light purple. has a decent understanding of the true nature of the circus, but not nearly as good of an understanding as kinger. his overalls look pink, but they're more of a light red, when put in an art program. doesn't want to leave. details in yellow.
gummigoo: green and yellow. the room he (literally) found himself in, was dark blue, but for the brief time he had sentience, escape or staying didn't matter. it was about trying to figure out who he was, and if he should tell his friends.
kaufmo: yellow. details in blue and red. didnt escape.
queenie: red. didnt escape.
exit door: red. fake.
chinese room door: red. fake.
jax says "follow your heart, pick your favourite colour" when pomni is trying to disarm the bomb, and she automatically goes to cut the red (with red wire cutters), when kinger cuts in and says his favourite colour is blue; "it being closest to black and all." possibly something to do with the dark, or queenie's abstraction? pomni's president suit is blue. she's later put in charge of pressing the right button, and she wants to escape, even if she's confused.
when abel's telling his story, the background is in purple and red. he may have been telling the truth for some of the company backstory.
based on gumigoo, and the small details in the other's designs, my interpretation is that green represents figuring out yourself, and yellow represents figuring out your connections with others. i think there may be something as well with white being tied to the empty nothingness of the void, and black & the dark to the overwhelming everything of abstraction (and truth?) but i'm still working on that.
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
The warmth, the calm. He was inches away once again. So close to freedom- Jax?
It snaps him back, his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer, his brain ripping apart, and his eyes in a bright blurr. It all lasts for only a moment, but when it ends is when the irritation starts. The anger. Its almost blinding, causing him to storm to his door and swinging it open. Unaware the tears staining his face once he's in front of Ribbit.
Ribbit subconsciously steps back when the door is swung open. Her first instinct is to bite back, but that's never worked out well for either of them. She steels herself with a deep breath, letting her arms hang by her side.
“I was just coming to make sure you were okay.” She mutters, raising an eyebrow in confusion at the outburst. And the tears. And the- well, everything.
Jax felt himself shake, and was glad most of him was covered by the dark of his room. He stares at Ribbit as a new sudden wave of guilt hits him all at once. It makes him wince and look away.
"I'm... great." He mutters through his teeth, his tone dialed down now. "You guys really need to stop worrying about me. Just... go."
“Wh- I'm not just gonna go.” Ribbit snaps, holding the door before Jax even has a chance to try shut it. They miss their friend, and they're tired of talking to themself. “You literally just screamed at me for knocking. You're not ‘great’.”
She hesitates, before pulling on the door firmly. “Let me in.”
Jax doesn't speak at first, only letting Ribbit give him an ear full. But once the tension on the door favors Ribbit's hand, it makes him tense up again.
"Stop!" He presses back, not enough to slam on Ribbit, but enough to keep it where it was. "I don't need to be coddled and looked after! Like, come on, the others probably love it! Just let it happen!"
His eyes now staring into hers, pupils shorter and perhaps even a little scribbled. "I've hurt you, I've hurt Kaufmo, I've hurt Pomni and Ragatha and Gangle and god knows who else! Just let me go!"
Ribbit pulls on the door again, slowly getting more frustrated and slightly desperate. They have a sneaking suspicion that they know what's going on, and it does absolutely nothing to make them want to leave. It just makes them more desperate to stay.
“Let you go? Go where?” She asks, trying to wedge herself in the doorway. She knows. She wants to be wrong, but she knows she isn't. She just wants to hear him admit to it.
He lets out a weak laugh, his grin turning weaker and forced as the tears slowly come back. "Where else?! Where I should have went from the f%$#ing beginning!"
His yells only grew louder, more desperate in itself. He tried to keep the door from opening any further, from letting Ribbit it. But his flooded emotions made his strength seem far less intense. He took a step back, but still tried to keep Ribbit out. "Where I should have went instead of you and Kaufmo!"
A sob hitches in his throat, catching his breath in his chest. "I can't... Ribbit, I can't..."
Ribbit makes a frustrated noise as Jax keeps fighting her, but she pauses at the admission, standing still in the doorway. She stays quiet for a few moments, listening quietly and wondering to herself, how did we get here?
“Jax..” They start, gently tugging on the door. She hasn't got it in her to be angry anymore. In fact, she's just scared. They've never been good at being the emotional support, and they know that they simply can't mess this up. She doesn't want to be alone.
Jax stares back, tears stinging his eyes and wetting the floor around him. His breath hitches again, causing a hiccup before he collapses to his knees, completely given up keeping ribbit out.
His breath began to hyperventilate and his body shaking much more violently. Hands now rushing to hold his own head, as if in any way it would stop the spinning thoughts. "I-I-I c-can't, I can't d-do this! I can't keep doing this!"
Ribbit slides into the room and closes the door as soon as she can. They want to go over and help, but seeing their friend like this makes their own eyes burn a little. She bites her lip and looks away, trying to keep herself calm before she approaches.
They take a few shaky steps closer, unsure of what to say. Instead, she just guides the rabbit's head against her chest, resting her chin between his ears.
“I'm sorry, bunny..” They mumble, because what else can they say? All they wanted to hear when this happened to them was a sorry.
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
The warmth, the calm. He was inches away once again. So close to freedom- Jax?
It snaps him back, his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer, his brain ripping apart, and his eyes in a bright blurr. It all lasts for only a moment, but when it ends is when the irritation starts. The anger. Its almost blinding, causing him to storm to his door and swinging it open. Unaware the tears staining his face once he's in front of Ribbit.
Ribbit subconsciously steps back when the door is swung open. Her first instinct is to bite back, but that's never worked out well for either of them. She steels herself with a deep breath, letting her arms hang by her side.
“I was just coming to make sure you were okay.” She mutters, raising an eyebrow in confusion at the outburst. And the tears. And the- well, everything.
Jax felt himself shake, and was glad most of him was covered by the dark of his room. He stares at Ribbit as a new sudden wave of guilt hits him all at once. It makes him wince and look away.
"I'm... great." He mutters through his teeth, his tone dialed down now. "You guys really need to stop worrying about me. Just... go."
“Wh- I'm not just gonna go.” Ribbit snaps, holding the door before Jax even has a chance to try shut it. They miss their friend, and they're tired of talking to themself. “You literally just screamed at me for knocking. You're not ‘great’.”
She hesitates, before pulling on the door firmly. “Let me in.”
Jax doesn't speak at first, only letting Ribbit give him an ear full. But once the tension on the door favors Ribbit's hand, it makes him tense up again.
"Stop!" He presses back, not enough to slam on Ribbit, but enough to keep it where it was. "I don't need to be coddled and looked after! Like, come on, the others probably love it! Just let it happen!"
His eyes now staring into hers, pupils shorter and perhaps even a little scribbled. "I've hurt you, I've hurt Kaufmo, I've hurt Pomni and Ragatha and Gangle and god knows who else! Just let me go!"
Ribbit pulls on the door again, slowly getting more frustrated and slightly desperate. They have a sneaking suspicion that they know what's going on, and it does absolutely nothing to make them want to leave. It just makes them more desperate to stay.
“Let you go? Go where?” She asks, trying to wedge herself in the doorway. She knows. She wants to be wrong, but she knows she isn't. She just wants to hear him admit to it.
He lets out a weak laugh, his grin turning weaker and forced as the tears slowly come back. "Where else?! Where I should have went from the f%$#ing beginning!"
His yells only grew louder, more desperate in itself. He tried to keep the door from opening any further, from letting Ribbit it. But his flooded emotions made his strength seem far less intense. He took a step back, but still tried to keep Ribbit out. "Where I should have went instead of you and Kaufmo!"
A sob hitches in his throat, catching his breath in his chest. "I can't... Ribbit, I can't..."
Ribbit makes a frustrated noise as Jax keeps fighting her, but she pauses at the admission, standing still in the doorway. She stays quiet for a few moments, listening quietly and wondering to herself, how did we get here?
“Jax..” They start, gently tugging on the door. She hasn't got it in her to be angry anymore. In fact, she's just scared. They've never been good at being the emotional support, and they know that they simply can't mess this up. She doesn't want to be alone.
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
The warmth, the calm. He was inches away once again. So close to freedom- Jax?
It snaps him back, his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer, his brain ripping apart, and his eyes in a bright blurr. It all lasts for only a moment, but when it ends is when the irritation starts. The anger. Its almost blinding, causing him to storm to his door and swinging it open. Unaware the tears staining his face once he's in front of Ribbit.
Ribbit subconsciously steps back when the door is swung open. Her first instinct is to bite back, but that's never worked out well for either of them. She steels herself with a deep breath, letting her arms hang by her side.
“I was just coming to make sure you were okay.” She mutters, raising an eyebrow in confusion at the outburst. And the tears. And the- well, everything.
Jax felt himself shake, and was glad most of him was covered by the dark of his room. He stares at Ribbit as a new sudden wave of guilt hits him all at once. It makes him wince and look away.
"I'm... great." He mutters through his teeth, his tone dialed down now. "You guys really need to stop worrying about me. Just... go."
“Wh- I'm not just gonna go.” Ribbit snaps, holding the door before Jax even has a chance to try shut it. They miss their friend, and they're tired of talking to themself. “You literally just screamed at me for knocking. You're not ‘great’.”
She hesitates, before pulling on the door firmly. “Let me in.”
Jax doesn't speak at first, only letting Ribbit give him an ear full. But once the tension on the door favors Ribbit's hand, it makes him tense up again.
"Stop!" He presses back, not enough to slam on Ribbit, but enough to keep it where it was. "I don't need to be coddled and looked after! Like, come on, the others probably love it! Just let it happen!"
His eyes now staring into hers, pupils shorter and perhaps even a little scribbled. "I've hurt you, I've hurt Kaufmo, I've hurt Pomni and Ragatha and Gangle and god knows who else! Just let me go!"
Ribbit pulls on the door again, slowly getting more frustrated and slightly desperate. They have a sneaking suspicion that they know what's going on, and it does absolutely nothing to make them want to leave. It just makes them more desperate to stay.
“Let you go? Go where?” She asks, trying to wedge herself in the doorway. She knows. She wants to be wrong, but she knows she isn't. She just wants to hear him admit to it.
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
The warmth, the calm. He was inches away once again. So close to freedom- Jax?
It snaps him back, his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer, his brain ripping apart, and his eyes in a bright blurr. It all lasts for only a moment, but when it ends is when the irritation starts. The anger. Its almost blinding, causing him to storm to his door and swinging it open. Unaware the tears staining his face once he's in front of Ribbit.
Ribbit subconsciously steps back when the door is swung open. Her first instinct is to bite back, but that's never worked out well for either of them. She steels herself with a deep breath, letting her arms hang by her side.
“I was just coming to make sure you were okay.” She mutters, raising an eyebrow in confusion at the outburst. And the tears. And the- well, everything.
Jax felt himself shake, and was glad most of him was covered by the dark of his room. He stares at Ribbit as a new sudden wave of guilt hits him all at once. It makes him wince and look away.
"I'm... great." He mutters through his teeth, his tone dialed down now. "You guys really need to stop worrying about me. Just... go."
“Wh- I'm not just gonna go.” Ribbit snaps, holding the door before Jax even has a chance to try shut it. They miss their friend, and they're tired of talking to themself. “You literally just screamed at me for knocking. You're not ‘great’.”
She hesitates, before pulling on the door firmly. “Let me in.”
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
The warmth, the calm. He was inches away once again. So close to freedom- Jax?
It snaps him back, his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer, his brain ripping apart, and his eyes in a bright blurr. It all lasts for only a moment, but when it ends is when the irritation starts. The anger. Its almost blinding, causing him to storm to his door and swinging it open. Unaware the tears staining his face once he's in front of Ribbit.
Ribbit subconsciously steps back when the door is swung open. Her first instinct is to bite back, but that's never worked out well for either of them. She steels herself with a deep breath, letting her arms hang by her side.
“I was just coming to make sure you were okay.” She mutters, raising an eyebrow in confusion at the outburst. And the tears. And the- well, everything.
From dark and cold, to bright and warm. Jax's head had been flooded with memories both from outside and inside the circus. It was changing him, so much it had even caught the attention from others. His once bright, obnoxious jokster self had been dwindled down to a dark husk.
He had been locked away in his room for two days now, staring at nothing but shadows and turned away photos. Until it happened again. The lights, the gentle music, the warmth and sense of belonging again. He closes his eyes, hoping this time, begging that this time, he wouldn't be interrupted.
Ribbit has been hovering around Jax's room for those two days. Sometimes she just sits outside of his door and talks for a while, even if she knows that he probably isn't listening to her. She wants to ask how she can make it better, but she never bothers, because she already knows the answer. It plays in her mind over and over again. You can't.
However, they've never been the most patient person to exist. And they're getting pretty tired of waiting. So, once she's sure everyone's occupied with eating dinner, she excuses herself from the table and walks down the hallway towards her friends door.
She raises her hand and knocks loudly. When she doesn't get an answer, she knocks again, more insistently this time. “Jax?”
*Someone new had appeared in the digital circus, it was a 13 year old girl, sporting messy brown hair that had bright cyan highlights and that faded into a cherry sorta color, a bright purple and gray striped shirt, purple pants that seemed a bit small on the girl and had scrapes on her feet, she also had a pretty big backpack that was dragging across the ground while the girl wore it that’s how big it was, she was very confused, looking around where she’d just…appeared into-*
@the-plushie-friendships
Ribbit is the only one around, the others all gone on an adventure. They've so glad they don't have to do those anymore, being a ghost and all. He almost jumps out of his skin when someone appears out of nowhere.
At first, they consider disappearing and leaving the girl to figure it out, but they're honestly intrigued. There's never really been a kid in the circus, or at least, not one as young as she looks. He sighs and creeps closer, not that his footsteps make much noise anyways.
“How did you manage to make a doll of someone you don't- you know what? Nevermind.” Ribbit shakes their head, before grinning again. “I can show you around, if you want. You just gotta keep it a secret, ‘kay?”
“Alrighty!” Ribbit grabs her arm and starts walking down the hall. “This is where everyone's rooms are! No one actually needs to sleep here, but it's nice to do it anyways. The doors with crosses on are people who have-”
She pauses, slowing to a stop. “... Do you have plushies of everyone here..?”
Ribbit stays silent for a few moments. She seems to be distracted by a door with what looks to be a clown's face crossed out. Their shoulders droop momentarily, before they take a deep breath and straighten up.
“Right, where were we-? Oh! Yeah. Rooms. Uhhh-” She looks around, before leading them both down a different hallway. “There's a bunch of random rooms around here. Try not to explore too much, some of them have jumpscares.”
Ribbit eventually leads them both outside, squinting in the light. It isn't actually that bright.
“There are the- um. Grounds. There's a bunch of stuff that no one's ever really explored, um..” She looks around, shielding her eyes with a hand. “We have a playground. You- you like playgrounds, right?”
