why

18 | England

[linda-belcher]

remember when you used to go over to your friend’s house and you’d go down to the “computer room” to the dad’s old shitty desktop computer and sit on the giant black leather computer chair and your friend would show you charlie the unicorn and epic rap battles of history type of stuff on youtube while their younger siblings bugged you for a turn to use the computer

[wildernesswitchery-deactivated2]

…this is so specific but… yes I do remember.

[unabating-deactivated20190408]

Holy shit how much does that cat weigh

[erarg]

sneeze on your knuckles before a fight in order to inflict poison damage

[shittyidea]

Drive too fast for speed cameras to take a photo of you

[unshrink]

last night I heard my mom telling my dad, “I have two children, stop being the third”.

[userboxed]

[arsonsara]

[stability]

[nicotinesan]

[dulect]

“Sorry I’m so bad at replying! I’ve just had such a busy day!”

[siobhanblank-deactivated2019011]

cishets: LGBT ppl are so easily triggered by harmless jokes

LGBT ppl: this imaginary person is a lesbian

cishets:

[shittyidea]

Wasp Olympics

[capacity]

I really just ignore phone calls. Like leave a message. I don’t check those either but like

[just-shower-thoughts]

“Finally” is pronounced as ‘final - e’ but “finale” is pronounced as 'fi - nally’

[peenroyalty]

some asshole: “Why do you even like that character?”

me: “Because they’re a great character.”

asshole: “But they’ve done so many shitty and problematic things, you can’t just excuse-”

me: “I said a GREAT CHARACTER not a GOOD PERSON you imaginationless wet napkin, this character is an asshole and a human disaster who deserves everything coming to them but they c a n s t i l l b e m y f a v o r i t e”

[acclamatorsgrandad]

[neurocripple]

someone: *asks me a yes/no question* me: huh? what did you ask? them: i said- me, finally processing the question: yes

[guy]

im so lonely