Slightly Flying

dream team

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VSCO girl “and I oop” is midwestern “Ope” erasure. 

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I think the rates for Uber and Lyft and other ride services should be proportionate to how far a person has traveled in their life.

Like, if you’ve lives in one state your whole life, the rate is high bc the distance, proportionally to your experience, is high.

But if you’ve flown to different countries your perception of distance is different, so the rate should be lower given the subjective view of the distance being traveled.

In this essay it will be proposed...

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Some vintage Self defense Manuel photos

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TWO DUDES CHILLING IN A HOT TUB 5 FT APART CUZ THEYRE NOT GAY

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In a herculean feat of laziness, I found a spot for my soda can while showering. Check mate.

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If your goal is to crush people's dreams, but you're bad at it, and so don't crush anyone's dreams, then you fail. But in failing, you've crushed your own dream, and are therefor good at it, and have succeeded. Should you be happy or sad?

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I always see posts about self-care and little things you can do to brighten your day when you're feeling down. I also always see people saying that often it's not a matter of deciding: depression and anxiety are powerful incapacitating forces, making it hard to do the little self-help things that are recommended.

Personally, I've found a happy medium. When I'm in a good place, I do the little things (face washing, hair brushing, showers, little food treats, etc.), despite them not being necessary, as I'm in a good place. They're easier to do when I'm in a healthy mindset, clearly. 

Then, they become a habit.

Habits are easier to continue if they're second nature, muscle memory, than if they're one off self-care attempts. When things are bad, it's hard to do the little things, but it's a bit easier if its already part of my daily routine. 

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Halloween

Halloween is weird. It's like a remnant of some sort of ritual of passage or certification of adulthood, or straight up militaristic training. Like, it's a ritualistic traumatization (haunted houses), practice in disguise and active on the spot lying (costume and character application/acting) and mandatory distribution of rations.

"Z'glan: You're telling me you disguise your offspring as mutants or dangerous criminals, send them out into the night to be traumatized, harassed, and buffeted by strangers in exchange for high caloric rations?" Human Joseph: "I mean...yeah? But also no..."

Followed by someone shouting from another room of the ship Human Sharon: "Z'glan don't be so judgmental! Your species sends members to fight to the death on every major seasonal fluctuation!" Z'glan: "yes, but they are mature members, not infant offspring"

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So, no lie, this happened. I was at the Renaissance Faire and they have a show called the Washer Wench, where it's an audience participation gag. They called up three men and told them that they would each receive a rose to give up their girlfriends IF they completed a dare. The first two guys did the ridiculous tasks (one had to run across the grounds screaming like Tarzan, the other had to put on a pair of underpants over his pants in less than 15 seconds) and then they got to the third guy. The cast joked with him, teased him, etc, as they were want to go, asking him "Did he love his girlfriend? Was she his only girlfriend? Would he do anything for her?" The guy took it well, laughing and answering. When they finally gave him the rose he walked back to his seat and handed the rose to the guy he had been sitting with. Needless to say the crowd went buck wild, and it was awesome. I talked with him after, and he was there with his girlfriend, but it was an epic moment nonetheless.

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It's been very dry lately where I live ( California. I know: shocking that it's dry) and I've had a cold, so my nose is rather irritated. My mother, who just spent the last 10 minutes quietly singing "penis and vagina" at me while I tried to order food, noticed that my nose had started bleeding. Her response was to laugh so hard that she spewed chip shrapnel at me, stabbing me in the eye and further incapacitating me. True maternal love.

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Water in early spring

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