hello

hi, i'm elle and i'm from portland, oregon

[fairycosmos]

me in my head at the supermarket: nobody is ever going to fucking love me. omg 25% off

[whatwhiteswillneverknow]

Stay safe out there.

[switchbladesounds-deactivated20]

Jay Pharaoh’s John Mulaney impression

[butchmachine]

Holy shit

[thetaxidermy-ofyouandme]

That wasn’t an impression John Mulaney possessed him

[pettycentral]

[boeing747]

NO MORE NEGATIVE SELF TALK. I AM CRAZY AND THATS COOL AND SEXY OF ME

[tomfordvelvetorchid-deactivated]

Grow the FUCK up and learn how to communicate

[toxictiktoks]

[yuyuuyuyuu-deactivated20230726]

2020 i trust you bitch

[yuyuuyuyuu-deactivated20230726]

ok fuck you

[niknak79]

[bpdjayjay]

new person: hi!

me: my personality for you will arrive in 5-7 business days once I figure out what makes you happy and how I feel around you

[fuks]

[benepla-deactivated20200506]

i hate airpods dude id rather be broke than have two lil tiny things to keep track of. “oh there’s like a carrier” muh muh muh like i’ll remember the carrier when im barreling out of my door with the bus coming in 2 minutes. an airpod falls out and falls into a storm drain. i fling my head around to watch it fall and the other one flies out into the street and my bus crushes it. i scream in agony and run up to it and the bus just barrels straight over me bc bus drivers in chicago have 3 kill allowances a year

[bruce-slutsteen]

John Oliver makes a plea for all those who are able to social distance themselves for the good of the vulnerable and the tireless healthcare workers.

[fffcuk-deactivated20120605]

[apricotshark]

b99week - day two - favourite cold open

only the best and most infamous scene in the entire show

[softlenaluthor]

[thegunlady]

#every year he doesnt have an emmy is a sham

[i-couldnt-think-of-one]

they rob him EVERY YEAR

[jillianleedy]