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Discord server

hey guys! I know I haven’t been active on here. but its because i’m running a server on the side.

the server is a good little hangout if you wanna chat with me and others! the server itself has quite a few things to offer.

for starters, we have a large selection of image channels, built for anybody who likes certain kinks.

we also have a few bots to keep the server entertained, as well as a few channels to talk about games. including, if you’re into it. card games as well!

it’s also a good spot to catch me talking about upcoming characters and help create them with me. of course, the same goes for anyone in the server. we do share ideas too.

its also a good way to get to know me, and maybe perhaps even get to become my friend. if you want that of course

if you’re keen to join you can do so here if you want: Click this to join

prokopetz

Some day I’m going to have to come up with a crack headcanon about what exactly is up with the body types in Hyrule’s royal family.

I mean, yeah, it’s probably just dramatic license, but if you take it as fully diegetic, King Hyrule is a straight up beast of a man.

Ganondorf is Gerudo, so there’s at least some textual justification for him being a lanky ogre-man, but what’s King Hyrule’s excuse?

He’s like eight feet tall, and about three feet broad at the shoulder; his fist is the size of an ordinary man’s head!

And yet his daughter consistently has totally average proportions.

There’s something funny going on with the royal bloodline, is what I’m saying.

prokopetz

@dovsherman replied:

Zelda is very young. Give her another ten or twenty years and she may grow to look a lot more like her father.

Okay, this is hands-down my favourite response, even if it is facetious. I absolutely need to see fanart of a thirtysomething Zelda who’s inherited her father’s inhuman proportions.

fledgling-witch

We’re thinking all wrong here. This has nothing to do with family bloodline:

In Zelda games, fully grown adult rulers are just bigger than everyone else. You gain a position of authority, and you get big.

The kings of Hyrule? Great big fellas. Ganondorf? Huge. The Zora kings? Gargantuan. The zora queen’s ghost? Far bigger than any living zora in Twilight Princess. Headmaster Gaepora of the Knights’ Academy in Skyloft? Towering. King Bulbin? Absolute unit. Kaneli, the owl leader of the Rito? Biggest bird in the village. The leader of the ancient robots or the Parellae? Literally dragons. Midna, once restored to her throne? Statuesquely tall. Elderly Impa? The largest Sheikah if you include her hat, which is a moral imperative.

So a Zelda who takes the throne WILL be larger than other Hylians, but not because of genealogy, but because it’s part of the job description. The only possible alternative is that I’m confusing cause and effect and Zelda will never gain political power because of her lack of extreme girth.

Here’s a quick comparison of a typical species member:

And here’s a leader of the same species:

prokopetz

Now there’s a fun idea. I wonder if you gradually grow into it, or whether our hypothetical Queen Zelda will just don the crown and instantly “power up” to full imperial stature, like Mario picking up a mushroom?

prokopetz

@ultimatwilight9001 replied:

*looks at r34* well internet, you know what to do

Nah, Rule 34 artists would screw it up – either they’d give her biceps-like-sacks-of-boulders bodybuilder physique, or else they’d just make her really fat. Neither of those particularly reflect the Standard Hyrulian Imperial Build, at least not for Hylians.

silvysartfulness

Did anyone say giant, middle-aged Queen Zelda? Because that is a delightful concept.

And for the record, biceps-like-rocks and/or fat sounds awesome too, and I’d love to see it drawn!

linaxtic

All I wanna do

Is see you turn into

A giant woman

creativerule34hentai

The Hylian succession is decided by fistfights. The bigger and stronger wins. One day Zelda will enter her father’s throne room, he will ask: “What are you doing, Zelda?”, and she’ll reply in a grave voice: “Succeeding you, faw-ther!”

I kinda wanna try being a camwhore for girls...

Anyone else ever get that feeling?