im not a pheasant plucker

im lydia and i don't watch dan and phil anymore

[labias]

[virgoassbitch]

she can fuck both me AND my man for 700k 

[obsessedwithfiction]

[fapitalism-deactivated20120910]

[raisemysonbootlicker]

This is the money Patrick. Reblog so money will come your way

[gvldenhour]

“I’m getting back in line.”

[sniggadoodles]

OKAY but i just reblogged this last night and guess what i got today from my workplace’s self-audit!

THANK YOU PATRICK FOR FREE MONEY

[musinvenusian]

BLESS ME PATRICK

[slavery]

My kink?

A hug… maybe holding a hand

[svzannebrown]

all that anyone needs to know about my time in japan

[sushinfood]

i am proud of this bear and i implore everyone applaud this man and the actual pain on his face delivering those lines for the teddy

[meezy7-deactivated20210917]

Fuckin Hi Quality Content

[inkskinned]

me looking at the person i like: i am enamored even with the way your fingers move, with the way the light plays on your skin, with your freckles and your smile and your laughter, with your voice, with how you get around the things you love, with your humor,  me aloud: what’s up asshole

[fuckoffidiots69-deactivated2021]

everyone talks about minding their business on tumblr and I reblog the posts and shit but I’m a fake. I’m the nosiest bitch on the planet I will beg for info I wanna know the full story with details

[teuer]

[senseitive]

do u ever zone out but ur aware that ur zoned out but ur too lazy to zone back in

[baetology]

Describe your perfect date in detail.

[sonypraystation]

ideal date: it happens

[bibliotechno]

What is my perfect date? I break into Tiffany’s at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It’s priceless. As I’m taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It’s her father’s business. She’s Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don’t trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he’s the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris, by the Trocadero. She’s been waiting for me all these years; she’s never taken another lover. I don’t care, I don’t show up. I go to Berlin. That’s where I stashed the chandelier.

[ithelpstodream]

[bob-belcher]

[awesome-picz]

Dangerous Dogs Behind “Beware Of Dog” Signs.

[foodfightme]

Joey has killed more than you can imagine.

[ms-mazarin]

Words to replace said, except this actually helps

I got pretty fed up with looking for words to replace said because they weren’t sorted in a way I could easily use/find them for the right time. So I did some myself.

IN RESPONSE TO Acknowledged Answered Protested

INPUT/JOIN CONVERSATION/ASK Added Implored Inquired Insisted Proposed Queried Questioned Recommended Testified

GUILTY/RELUCTANCE/SORRY Admitted Apologized Conceded Confessed Professed

FOR SOMEONE ELSE Advised Criticized Suggested

JUST CHECKING Affirmed Agreed Alleged Confirmed

LOUD Announced Chanted Crowed

LEWD/CUTE/SECRET SPY FEEL Appealed Disclosed Moaned

ANGRY FUCK OFF MATE WANNA FIGHT Argued Barked Challenged Cursed Fumed Growled Hissed Roared Swore

SMARTASS Articulated Asserted Assured Avowed Claimed Commanded Cross-examined Demanded Digressed Directed Foretold Instructed Interrupted Predicted Proclaimed Quoted Theorized

ASSHOLE Bellowed Boasted Bragged

NERVOUS TRAINWRECK Babbled Bawled Mumbled Sputtered Stammered Stuttered

SUAVE MOTHERFUCKER Bargained Divulged Disclosed Exhorted

FIRST OFF Began

LASTLY Concluded Concurred

WEAK PUSY Begged Blurted Complained Cried Faltered Fretted

HAPPY/LOL Cajoled Exclaimed Gushed Jested Joked Laughed

WEIRDLY HAPPY/EXCITED Extolled Jabbered Raved

BRUH, CHILL Cautioned Warned

ACTUALLY, YOU’RE WRONG Chided Contended Corrected Countered Debated Elaborated Objected Ranted Retorted

CHILL SAVAGE Commented Continued Observed Surmised

LISTEN BUDDY Enunciated Explained Elaborated Hinted Implied Lectured Reiterated Recited Reminded Stressed

BRUH I NEED U AND U NEED ME Confided Offered Urged

FINE Consented Decided

TOO EMO FULL OF EMOTIONS Croaked Lamented Pledged Sobbed Sympathized Wailed Whimpered

JUST SAYING Declared Decreed Mentioned Noted Pointed out Postulated Speculated Stated Told Vouched

WASN’T ME Denied Lied

EVIL SMARTASS Dictated Equivocated Ordered Reprimanded Threatened

BORED Droned Sighed

SHHHH IT’S QUIET TIME Echoed Mumbled Murmured Muttered Uttered Whispered

DRAMA QUEEN Exaggerated Panted Pleaded Prayed Preached

OH SHIT Gasped Marveled Screamed Screeched Shouted Shrieked Yelped Yelled

ANNOYED Grumbled Grunted Jeered Quipped Scolded Snapped Snarled Sneered

ANNOYING Nagged

I DON’T REALLY CARE BUT WHATEVER Guessed Ventured

I’M DRUNK OR JUST BEING WEIRDLY EXPRESSIVE FOR A POINT/SARCASM Hooted Howled Yowled

I WONDER Pondered Voiced Wondered

OH, YEAH, WHOOPS Recalled Recited Remembered

SURPRISE BITCH Revealed

IT SEEMS FAKE BUT OKAY/HA ACTUALLY FUNNY BUT I DON’T WANT TO LAUGH OUT LOUD Scoffed Snickered Snorted

BITCHY Tattled Taunted Teased

[writing-reigns-deactivated20200]

reblog to save a writer 

[nichelle-my-belle-deactivated20]

excellent resource

[80slesbiab]

Kate McKinnon getting her hair pulled by a pornstar

[pink-rabbits-deactivated2017011]

i actually cry at this

[rexpinn-deactivated20190705]

tag yourself. I’m Kate

[kermapippurisaatana]

Jesus almighty Christ I´m 2000% Kate.

[motherearthsign]

what is the difference between falling in love and having a crush

if they get a haircut and they’re ugly it’s a crush

[weezley]

that’s a weirdly valid point

[neilcicierega]