Love Begins
Cosmic Funnies
Lauren Shippen
Game Changer & Make Some Noise
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr
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d e v o n
Fai_Ryy
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@phelanxroen-blog
IT'S HAPPENING
Unintentional Second in Command
So much faith
ZOMBIELAND: DOUBLE TAP (2019)
please imagine with me: grace on erid, malnourished to hell and back, stuck in the eridians constructed medbay while they synthesise his nutrients.
the eridians have assembled the best medical team erid has to offer (under threat of rocky) and they are just. ecstatic. to have the opportunity, the /honour/, of caring for and studying an alien this close up.
so they do their research with the human portable thinking machine rocky has given them, doing their utmost to find out absolutely everything that would make their resident human more at ease with them.
says here humans find comfort in faces? hm yeah i do suppose it might be unsettling to not make eye contact with someone who's speaking to you.
cue: grace lying on his med bed, and a small army of rock people walk into his hospital ward, saying, "hello grace we're your recovery team you're in good hands" and they just. fucking stuck googly eyes onto their carapaces and sharpied a smile underneath in the approximation of a face. the googly eyes rattle as they walk. on one of them, the eyes are misaligned. on another one falls off with an audible /splat/ onto the floor.
one of the interns was super enthusiastic and just put a face on every side of their carapace, because, quote, what if i turn away? i want human grace to be comforted regardless of which way im facing!
grace would not stop cackling. he's already starving and probably hallucinating and this is the funniest shit he's seen in weeks. essentially a temu version of 'be not afraid'.
rockys mad at everyone involved, especially grace, because it's not that funny.
one time I went over to a friend's house and their housemate was making paper in the living room, and we saw this big tub full of water they were using to dissolve old scrap paper into a slurry, and everyone was immediately like "oh, you need scrap paper?" and started turning out their jacket pockets and producing expired coupons and bus tickets and crumpled receipts and old shopping lists and whatever else they'd been carrying round with them for no good reason, and passing it all to the paper-making housemate to make sure it was suitable before it got torn up and dropped into the tub, while people took turns stirring the slurry with a big wooden stick. it was strangely ritualistic, like presenting an offering to some kind of temple elder for inspection before placing it in a watery shrine to be devoured and reformed. pulp for the pulp god.
For a little while I was making these dudes (I called them sneefters), but they kept breaking or falling over in the kiln. Maybe sometime I'll try some more that are sitting like the strawberry & crying ones.
I am so tickled by this chochloma mug i madeeeeee
Chochloma is a traditional slavic folk art style usually done on dark wooden dishes and spoons. Illustrating motifs of stuff you can find in a forest.
yaknow, it occurs to me that rocky didnt realize how tall Grace was until they turned the gravity on.
Rocky: Oh cool, this (alien) has a similar bodyplan to mine. 5 protrusions from a carapace. they seem to favor two for manipulating items and another two to steady themselves, while the last one appears for observation and brain storage. interesting! i bet they walk around on all fours instead of eridians on 3 legs. super neat!
rocky watching Grave balance on two legs walking around the hail mary at a height at least triple his own: what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck
seething about the fact that i will never experience photosynthesis in my own useless cells. i bet it feels so good when the light of the sun both warms you and fuels you at the same time. a bone-deep satisfaction mixed with a heated sugar-rush and endless brightness. not that i would fucking know
going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room
Blue Lois
can i help you
Red Marge
jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack
World Heritage Post
i deserve a medal for this post. not because i was particularly funny but because i survived an onslaught of nearly one hundred gimmick blogs in the wake of this post popping off, and the fact that i didn’t try to track any of them down and snuff them out with my bare hands is a testament to my immeasurable strength and should be rewarded. at one point i had “the official letter h” add on to this post. you wanna know that blog’s gimmick? the really funny and original and worthwhile gimmick the official letter h blog had? yep you guessed it they just gave me the god damned letter H and then fucked off. only jesus knows the suffering i endured over that harsh winter, and he wept for me
Cosmic alignment…
Fuck all of the good luck posts out there. Reblog this to immaculate your vibes
Can I get seconds of that stew...
For those of you looking for these recipes, they're from Cooking for Engineers. Which should shock nobody. But it's a great site. Sadly seems to be defunct, but I can personally vouch for the recipes being presented in a foolproof* manner. Not only is the card layout great (honestly, just having the oven temperature right there instead of having to keep trying to find it in the recipe is a game changer), but every step has a photo. None of this "until done" rubbish, it'll have a photo of "yeah, here's how it should look, and no, this photo isn't overly produced".
And unlike most cooking blogs, the commentariat substitutions are generally competent!
If you're still not sold on the site, may I add that he once took a pair of calipers to Chili's to test their claim that "their new Smokehouse Bacon Burgers [...] have 'the thickest bacon you've ever seen'."
Unsurprisingly, his verdict was:
(on Friday, April 13, 2008 at the Chili's in Santa Clara, California) they served bacon that was (to an accuracy of 1/128th of an inch) 3/16 in. thick (4.75 mm ± 0.2mm) after cooking. [...] Does it truly hold up to its claim that it's the "thickest bacon you've ever seen"? My guess is that for most people that's true, but for me it was most definitely not the case.
So yeah, definitely check out his website, whether you're a novice or experienced cook, whether you're an engineer or someone who didn't even know what a caliper was before you started reading this. I highly recommend starting with the shepherd's pie (yes, it's the same one from Joy of Cooking), and either the creme brulee or the biscotti for dessert. The recipe image OP used was for espresso brownies. Presumably roasting your own beans is optional, though.
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*It's me. I'm the fool. I'm proof that even a fool can follow the recipes.
i need to see him swimming. stat!
like this
or like this (?)
or maybe, the secret third option...
