i would like to sincerely apologise and take responsibility for my actions and stubborn behaviour.
after logging back in after having some time to reflect, i understand now that my behaviour has deeply upsetted and confused many of you – followers and not – and that i’ve disappointed lots of people. i am truly sorry for that.
i acknowledge i’ve made a huge mistake, but i’d really appreciate if you stopped sending me death threats and telling me to kms. i am also a human being with feelings and lots of lessons yet to learn.
after posting this, i shall delete the fic and i will be logging off for a while to reflect further on my behaviour.
i by no means intended to come off as racist, as someone that lived as an immigrant in another country i should’ve known better as i’ve grown up around people telling me and my family to ‘go back to my country’ and other racist things, which i won’t mention because this isn’t about me rn.
again i am very very sorry, i don’t expect my former mutuals nor followers to forgive me, but just know that i have learned what i’ve done wrong and will never do anything like this again.
sending love and apologies to the people that were affected by my actions.
tw: themes of su*cidal thoughts.ᐟ loneliness.ᐟ depression.ᐟ
“i mean, what’s the point..” you let out a soft sigh without lifting up your gaze, you couldn’t stop the heavy feeling you had in your chest. the one that you’ve had for ever since you could remember.
“everyone always leaves.. forgets.” your lips trembled as you held back your tears. you knew the moment you’d look him in the eyes would be when you’d break, so you focused your gaze on your hands as you were scratching off your black nail polish, making it all cracked and patchy.
“have i or dean ever forgotten about you?” he asked softly, shifting in his spot, his brows frowned but eyes soft, looking at you with that typical worried puppy expression.
“you eventually will..” you sniffled, giving away that you’re on the verge of bursting into tears. “just like the rest.. it’s inevitable.”
darkness surrounded the both of you as you two sat at the edge of what seemed to be an abandoned bridge you found, legs hanging down, swinging loosely. the only source of light was the waxing gibbous moon and the accompanying stars spread out across the night sky.
sam found you here, alone. after running away from the motel room you, sam and dean shared. the location wasn’t far from.
now he was trying to convince you to stay, that you had reasons to continue moving forward, that you weren’t a burden or a problem like you always claimed to be due to your shitty upbringing.
he sat here with you to remind you that life was indeed worth living because you had him and dean by your side, supporting and helping you through whatever demons you were battling inside. the kind of demons you couldn’t simply defeat with salt and an exorcism.
Hii you seem like a nice and interesting person to talk to. I am not a well-known writer on here or anything I am not even a writer, but I am looking to make some friends on Tumblr and get to know more people on Tumblr. So would it be okay if I send you a message? If you don't feel comfortable with that it's okay I totally understand
hiii of course you can message me hun! <3
let’s make this clear; you don’t have to be a writer in order for you to yap with me (i’d hope that’s the case for most writers here but i can’t promise that)
so please don’t be shy to reach out if you wanna talk or yap about anything.
summary: ben gets this diabolical idea to tease and embarrass you in front of your friend hughie, as a way to remind you who you belong to
cw: 18+.ᐟ suggestive.ᐟ slight crack.ᐟ soldier boy being highly inappropriate & filthy.ᐟ ‘meat’ jokes.ᐟ vegetarian fem!reader.ᐟ
word count: 535
masterlist | taglist
soldier boy’s eyes lurked your way as he heard the sound of your laughter and chatter, which naturally meant you were having a lunch break with your best friend, hughie.
he felt a sharp pang of jealousy deep inside his chest. you were laughing, cutely giggling even – and that was thanks to another guy, the cumguzzler.
he was no real man, and definitely not your man. so how dare he make you laugh like that.
his eyes darted at hughie with hidden envy before letting himself silently observe you munching on your rabbit food – a salad with falafels or some shit like that.
he took a long drag of his cigarette before blowing out the smoke that curled around his personal space.
he had to step in somehow, to show the younger fella who you belong to, to mark his territory like a god damn dog that pisses everywhere.
soldier boy cleared his throat, sitting more comfortably in his seat, legs spreading apart to claim as much space as possible. after all he sees himself as an alpha male, and alphas claim everything right?
“y’know sweetheart, you’re not a real vegetarian you know that right?” soldier boy suddenly spoke, a half smoked cigarette resting between his fingers.
the odd and completely off-topic remark caught both you and hughie by surprise. both of you turning your heads to the older man.
“what are you talking about?” you raised a brow with a confused smile, sitting up in your seat.
“vegetarians don’t like meat, right?” soldier boy continued.
“yeah.. so?” you asked obliviously, taking a sip of your iced tea, your eyes darting from hughie to soldier boy.
“well you very much like mine inside ya.” he shrugged, his words making you choke on your drink, iced tea all over the table. mm’s gonna kill you if you don’t clean that up the way he likes, but that wasn’t your concern at the moment.
hughie’s eyes widened, hoping he misheard whatever soldier boy had spoken, but knowing the vulgar and unhinged granny fucker’s vocabulary – mishearing shit like this was very unlikely.
“what the fuck ben-“ you coughed, still choking on your drink.
the smugness of this man was unbelievable, the smirk plastered across his stupid face was so annoying, he’s lucky he’s handsome – and knows how to screw your brains out.
“just sayin, not very vegetarian friendly.” he added, taking another puff of his cigarette, lip curled into a smirk.
“but hey at least you’re gettin some of your daily protein the way we raw-dog it, ain’t that right darlin?” soldier boy chuckled and you covered your face with your hand out of pure embarrassment.
“y’like your holes creampied.” he grinned, as if he was proud of what he was doing, saying – because unironically, he was.
“oh my god–will you shut the fuck up?” you murmured, picking up the falafel ball from the container and throwing it at him. “asshole.”
“tried that already n ya liked it.” he added despite your reaction.
“took some convincing but in the end, you let me ass-fuck you.” he winked your way before standing up and casually leaving.
“m’ out of cigarettes, i’ll be back in five.”
thank you so much for reading! feedback and reblogs are always deeply appreciated by us writers <3
you've created and given me the type of comfort no one ever has, helping me push through everyday despite wanting to disappear. every single day my adoration and respect for you grows a double, and i see you as a blueprint as to what kind of person i wanna grow up to be. i love you jensen.
colour: forest green
season: autumn
chosen word: outcast
ʚଓ٠࣪⭑ your weapon is a sleek katana, blade polished to a mirror shine, wrapped in forest green silk at the hilt. it's precise and shows you discipline. it belongs to someone who learned control the hard way through chaos. someone who cuts clean instead of loud.
ʚଓ٠࣪⭑ dean doesn't laugh at you when you say you'll never be the good guy. instead, he lays his arm around your shoulders, fingers gripping gingerly at your forearm, tugging you closer. he sees you as someone who's trying to survive; steady and far stronger than what you think.
Autumn lays cool and gold over the city, wind tugging at your jacket as you sit cross-legged on the rooftop. The katana rests across your lap, its forest-green wrap dark against your hands.
“You ever think,” you say, eyes fixed on the stars, “that some of us just aren’t built to be the good guys?”
Dean leans back on his palms beside you. “That’s a hell of a leap.”
“I fight it,” you murmur. “But I still feel like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Sooner or later, people see teeth.”
He studies you for a long moment.
“Yeah,” he says quietly. “Wolves have teeth.”
Your throat tightens.
“But they protect their own. They run in packs. They survive.” His shoulder nudges yours. “Doesn’t make ’em villains. Makes ’em loyal.”
The city hums below. The stars don’t judge. Dean’s hand finds yours, steady and warm.
“Far as I’m concerned,” he adds, softer, “you’re in my pack.”
due to my current writers block and lack of motivation, i will be taking a break from this app as it has become very mentally draining for me.
i am not entirely sure when i’ll be back, as i also have stuff behind the scenes going on which i won’t get into.
but i hope to be back for spring time or so, i still have some drabbles & headcanons from last year sitting in my drafts so i might just post those in the meantime of my break, we shall see.
thank you for all the love and support this account receives from yall, it does keep me going knowing that there are people out there enjoying my work… but i just need some time away, that’s all.
and once i’m back i’ll dive into all your requests, i promise i haven’t forgotten nor am i ignoring them.
seeing how the disease has lowkey taken eric dane’s spark away and how exhausted he was…
it’s one of the worst ways for an active person to die..
“a dancer dies twice – once when they stop dancing, and this first death is the more painful.” — martha graham
it’s just truly heart breaking to witness as an active person myself…
but he fought to the very end despite it all – which is extremely admirable.
he was (and still is) a great example for his family, friends and fans — to never give up and to fight to the very end no matter what, even if there is no hope.
eric you will be truly missed and most importantly never forgotten. you’ve left behind a legacy that will stay with us.
you get sucked into the last movie you watched. How fucked are you?
last movie i watched was disney’s turning red
so i’m fine i think… just don’t go to a 4*town concert :))
i’m interested in everyone else’s so imma tag you @castielscaplan and then @hunterstieller @starlacore @dean0rin0 @cantchooseafav @classic-cevans @impala-dreamer @pieandflannel + anyone else
just wanted to say a HUGE THANK YOU to everyone that has engaged with this silly little project of mine.
i am forever grateful for all the love my work gets from yall, it’s never taken for granted! 🫶
and i sincerely apologise for not being able to tag some of you (that asked to be tagged) dumblr doesn’t allow me to tag certain accounts for god knows what reason even when they have the proper tagging settings on. i tried privately messaging some of you but it wouldn’t allow me that either.